H Versus the WoDAs of Friday, 7:30 a.m., no word yet on the novel contest. I should be anxious and frustrated, but as I wrote to Jeff in an email, something has changed in me. I’m still eager for the chance to write the book, of course, but it’s different now. Less edge to the emotion, perhaps. Less panicked drive.
I think it has something to do with prior commitments. I have a campaign setting that needs my attention. The words are all there, but – and forgive me for bringing this up – there is a spiritual component as well, a force of will that needs constant exertion lest the project fall to the wayside. If I start to focus on another mammoth project before the first is truly finished, I’ll have failed in my task as a writer.
I’m looking at the last paragraph and it reads like goobly-gook. Out of context, which I don’t have time to provide right now, it doesn’t make much sense. You’ll have to trust me on this one, at least until I can free up the hours to explain it.
Suffice it to say that Harley is a greedy, greedy writer. He wants every project, every spare word he can get. But he also believes, perhaps mistakenly, that everything he works on is imbued with a living spirit of sorts. And if that spirit is neglected, the work suffers for it.
It’s not a matter of getting a project it up to word count. I can do that blindfolded. It’s a matter of investing enough time and energy to ensure that a work is full-bodied, developed, and healthy.
If you’ve read some of my writing, you know that I fail at this on a pretty regular basis. But that’s due to a lack of skill, not for wont of passion, effort or time. Right now I have enough work to take me through to Summer, 2006. I’d jump at the chance for a 1st novel, but baring a major change in lifestyle, it would be negligent and irresponsible to take on a 90k project due in April.
When the rejection comes down I’ll be bummed, for certain, but I’ll also be writing.
PS. To Lara, Jaleigh, and everyone who has clicked over to the WW forums, or checked in on Choose Death because they were thinking about me. You guys are better friends than I deserve.
For me, that’s the real lesson. Thank you. I won’t forget it.