Laurence Fox will receive no support from beard wearers for London Mayor bid
The Beard Liberation Front, the informal network of beard wearers, has said that actor and anti-lockdown activist Laurence Fox will receive no support from the hirsute in his bid to be London Mayor this May.
Fox often wears a rather unkempt beard which is neither a designer or an organic style but appears to be the product of random growth.
The campaigners say that whatever the acting abilities of Mr Fox, his recent activities have clearly brought the hirsute into disrepute.
BLF Organiser Keith Flett said, we stand for a Beard Friendly London. Laurence Fox has an element of facial hair but he is a long way from the inclusive policies which the BLF promotes
The split amongst the ruling class of Ambridge over sheep futures has deepened this week.
Regular readers will recall that at Brookfield while leading patriarch David ‘Earl of Portland’ Archer wants to continue with mixed farming Roooth and Pip have argued that post-Brexit this is not the way forward and that there must be more focus on cattle.
Meanwhile Ben Archer who also supports the Brookfield modernisers has briefed Ruairi on the plan. He, having turned 18, is set to attend his first meeting of the Central Committee of Borchester Land. He has a plan that will allow sheep to be purged from Brookfield while not actually purging the sheep themselves (yet).
Under this plan it is Adam and his sheep farming operation that has got to ago. This will offer significant economies for Home Farm but Adam is concerned that the positive environmental impact of the sheep will be lost. Brian Aldridge who clearly backs the plan points out that in fact they will lease the land to David for the Brookfield sheep. Hence benefits and cost savings can both be achieved.
In short it looks like Adam and David versus the rest…..
Judge Jim
Jim Lloyd, or Jimbo as some call him, has agreed that he might be a little too judgemental at times. He however a Professor and it goes with the job. He should judge on…
Moss pleads guilty
According to Sergeant Knacker Burns Philip Moss has decided he will now plead guilty to whatever he ends up being charged with. No doubt he has a plea bargain in mind involving dropping others in it
Grey Gables crisis worsens
Iain is worried about Grey Gables. There are no guests and it is running out of money. Actually in the real world it shouldn’t be open at all and Tracey should be furloughed. No doubt Mr Sunak’s ‘generous’ Budget will help but as the Ambridge Socialist has reported the first Ambridge Wetherspoons is on the cards.
‘Wenger’s Law’ on football offsides may end VAR beard discrimination
The Beard Liberation Front, the informal network of beard wearers, has said that it believes that the new ‘Wenger’s Law’ on football offside decisions may have the important impact of stopping VAR discrimination against players with beards.
The rule change is currently being trialled in China.
At the moment if any part of a player that could score a goal-and that clearly includes the beard-is found to be in front of an opponent than they are judged to be offside.
Under the new Wenger’s Law if any part of the player that score a goal is level with an opponent they will be on-side. Since the beard will invariably be one aspect of the player that is at the forefront of their presence near goal, this will mean that a beard can no longer lead to a player being offside.
The campaigners note that there could still be some scope for VAR ambiguity however. Under Wenger’s Law there must be clear daylight between a player and an opponent for them to be judged offside. However if a player’s beard appears to be close to an opponent while the rest of them is not there may well still be an issue.
BLF Organiser Keith Flett said, Arsene Wenger has never worn a beard but we think on balance this change to the offside rule may help hirsute footballers.
The Campaign for Real Ale is 50 years old on 16th March (I’ve only managed 46 years membership). Its one of the larger voluntary organisations in the UK and like most the membership is ageing somewhat (myself included).
Still, the last year notwithstanding, people now live longer and are active for longer so this is not quite the statement it might have been decades ago. CAMRA has also made considerable efforts to ‘modernise’ and attract younger people who care about beer and pubs. Its not been without success but its work in progress.
At the moment its engaged in essential campaigning activity around the future of breweries and pubs and lots of related issues which if you are a pub goer you’ll be more than familiar with.
Against all this the Murdoch Times (6th March) has decided to publish a story about some on-line arguments between some members about various contentious issues. I cant usefully link to it because its paywalled. I happened to scan the story in the print edition.
CAMRA is genuinely, like the pub itself, a broad-brush thing, so opinions can vary but as CAMRA’s finance director Ben Wilkinson quoted in the piece notes whatever the disagreements, all are united in the need to defend and promote good beer and pubs.
As someone who remains actively involved in the labour movement and the left I’d say that while disagreements and arguments can be infuriating and time consuming they are sign that people care and are engaged. If all is quiet- and I’ve sat in those kind of meetings-it simply tells you people’s thoughts are elsewhere.
Hopefully before long the discussions can move off-line and back into the pub. And if you’re telling me Greene King renaming pubs called the Black Boy is ‘woke’ you’re wrong by the way.
Will Tottenham Cake feature on the new series of Celebrity Bake Off
A new series of Celebrity Bake Off starts on Tuesday 9th March and the big question is clearly whether the proletarian patisserie known as the Tottenham cake will feature. It was last on the main Bake Off show in 2013.
It has featured in the Guardian this week(below) and it remains on sale in bakeries in North London although possibly not those near the Emirates stadium. There is of course no comparable Arsenal cake.
It may be a little sweet for modern tastes and chilli version might go down well.
Tottenham pudding as Martyn Day notes is not something for human consumption. Just as now during World War two weekly collections of food waste were made in the area. At that time they ended up at the Down Lane refuse site at Tottenham Hale (very close to my abode) where they were turned into animal food as part of the war effort
It is important not to confuse the school dinner offering Tottenham cake (Pass notes, 3 March) with Tottenham pudding, an industrially produced boil-up of waste fruit and vegetables for consumption by chickens and pigs.
Martyn Day
Twickenham, London
Guardian Letters 6th March
How did school dinner cake first become associated with school? That’s unclear, but the recipe bears more than a passing resemblance to Tottenham cake. Although Tottenham cake traditionally has pink icing, whereas school dinner cake is traditionally served with a weirdly thin, pink custard.
I presume Tottenham cake comes from London. From the early 20th-century bakery of the Quaker Henry Chalkley, to be precise. The cake was handed out free to schoolchildren when Tottenham Hotspur first won the FA Cup in 1901.
BRITISH PIE WEEK: STEAK & STILTON VOTED CLASSIC BEARD FRIENDLY PIE
The Beard Liberation Front, the informal network of beard wearers, has said that with British Pie Week running from 1-7th March its annual poll on the most Beard Friendly Pie has found overwhelming support for a Steak, Stilton and ale pie as the classic beard friendly pie.
The hirsute campaign group say that as with many prepared foods the requirements of people with beards are often overlooked when it comes to pies. The outcome of the annual poll often reflects that with traditional pies designed for eating ‘on the go’ easily beat leading pie brands.
The BLF says that common issues with pies for those with beards are:
Excessive gravy
Puff or flaky pastry which ends up in the beard not the mouth
‘Deep filling’ making it difficult to avoid contact of the pie with the beard
The campaigners cite some types of the traditional steak and kidney pie as an example of pies which are made without thought for the requirements of the hirsute pie consumer. Such pies often have excessive gravy- and comparatively little steak and kidney- which ends up in the beard.
Unfortunately the same issues tend to apply to many vegetarian and vegan pies too
BLF Organiser Keith Flett said, last year’s winner the Scotch pie polled well but Steak & Stilton carried the day. It’s a tasty combination but also one that comes together well as a pie filling to prevent bits getting caught in the beard.
Rosa Luxemburg at 150.b. 5th March 1871: scourge of bureaucrats, cynics & empty rhetoricians*
It’s the 150th anniversary of the birth of Rosa Luxemburg. She was murdered by German Freikorps on 15th January 1919. Luxemburg was a leading member of the socialist Second International but unusual in the grouping in opposing the First World War.
On the 50th anniversary of her death on 15th January 1969 The Guardian published an appreciation by its then European Editor John Palmer* the first couple of paragraphs I repeat below:
Rosa Luxemburg is a strangely unsung martyr in the official Socialist pantheon. An outstanding leader of the Second International, she has been quietly forgotten by the official Social-Democratic Labour parties. A Marxist theorist and revolutionary on a par with Lenin, she has alternatively been regarded with suspicion and indifference by official Communist historians.
Yet her ideas, along with those of Trotsky, are having a renaissance among the young revolutionary New Left which is making itself felt both west and east of the Iron Curtain. This is no coincidence. In her lifetime Luxemburg was the scourge of bureaucrats, cynics and empty rhetoricians..
BEARD OF IRELAND 2021 POLL SEES COMPETITION BRISTLING
The Beard Liberation Front, the informal network of beard wearers, has said that competition for the Irish Beard of the Year 2021 is officially open
The 2017 winner was politician Colum Eastwood who bearded broadcaster William Crawley for the annual Award.
In 2018 the DUP’s Lee Reynolds shaved writer Dominic O’Reilly for the honour with Colum Eastwood in a steady third place.
In 2019 Lee Reynolds retained the title
The 2020 winner was Maynooth academic Peter Coles
The BLF says that while traditionally a land of predominantly clean-shaven cultures, Ireland has in recent times become something of a centre for stylish and trendy beards.
Contenders for the title in 2021 include a diverse range of the hirsute- a golfer, political activists, journalists, an academic as well as the two Health Ministers in Belfast and Dublin who are both hirsute.
The campaigners say the poll is specifically about the impact the beard of an individual has made in Irish public life and no other factor.
BLF Organiser Keith Flett said, competition for the 2021 Beard of Ireland Award will no doubt bristle with the winner announced on 17th March
There will be two preliminary Beard Off votes between 5-8th March and 9-12th March. The top two from each round will then go on to a Best Beard of Ireland vote between 13-16th March
Campaigners say change of image for Starmer now top priority as Tories take 13% poll lead
The Beard Liberation Front, the informal network of beard wearers, has said that a change of image for Labour leader Keir Starmer is now the top priority as a YouGov poll, mirroring other recent polls, gives the Tories a 13% lead
CON: 45% (+4)
LAB: 32% (-4)
GRN: 7% (-)
LDEM: 6% (+1)
REFUK: 3% (-)
via @YouGov, 03 – 04 Mar
Chgs. w/ 26 Feb
The clean shaven man in a suit image is just not working for Sir Keir. For many the Labour leader appears to be anonymous, rather than having a defining political image.
Previously the beard experts have said that repeated tweaks to Labour’s policy positions are not getting across to voters. They note that Boris Johnson has no set and discernible policies aside from promoting himself and staying in office for the time being.
The Beard Liberation Front has underlined it’s view that the way forward for Starmer is to grow a gravitas adding beard. They note that the Labour leader may be reluctant to do this given it might associate him with the well-known appearance of the immediate past leader of the Party.
However they say there are a vast range of beard styles available and Starmer could easily adopt one that emphasised both a sharp appearance and wisdom.
BLF Organiser Keith Flett said, a Labour Government is by far the most likely to act on beard friendly measures for the workplace and against discrimination in general. It is therefore concerned at Labour’s poll drift and believes that a change of image for Keir Starmer must now be the top priority