NO REST FOR THE AWAKE - MINAGAHET CHAMORRO

Last month we organized a forum at the University of Guam on nuclear dangers to Guam, both from the nuclear weapons of others, but also accidents involving the nuclear weapons kept on Guam by the US military or the nuclear-powered vehicles that are docked here. It was somewhat disappointing when in a room meant for close to 200 people at the UOG CLASS Lecture Hall, we only had about 40 people in attendance. As one of the speakers on the panel remarked, this is a critical issue, which few people seem to care about. That is one reason why it is so critical. It looms around us, as threats from others or dangers from within, but we don't seem to take it very seriously at all. Robert Underwood once said that living in a colony and not taking decolonization or colonialism seriously is like running a hospital without taking seriously issues of illness and treatment. I would argue a similar thing on Guam in terms of the dangers our heavily militarized existence presents. In 2010 I trav

This is the painting of the saddest person I know.  She lives in delusions and fantasies about herself and paints herself up everyday as if she is perfect and beautiful. Many people accept that surface of her not because they believe it to be true, but because they instinctive find that she offers to little to the world, that there isn't really any reason to consider her further.  I tried to paint that surface that she words so hard to pretend is real, to duplicate the sometimes comforting but also draining and taunting shell that she wishes others would accept as real.  But each time I would try to paint her, the sadness,  the loneliness, the insecurity, the self-hate, the pathetic inability to accept the truth of who she is, would come to the surface of the painting.  It is one thing when someone does not realize that they wear masks and live in fantasies, but she knows the truth, but still stubbornly and fearfully clings to lies. As a result she

Gaige yu' giya Luta gi este na weekend. Dumeskakansa ham yan i nobia-hu guini. Meggai dinimalas yan na'triste gi i finakpo' i sakkan para Guahu. Giya Luta hu kekehagong huyong todu ayu na piniti yan sahuma halom nuebu na fuetsa. Este na ma'pos na sakkan na'yafai para Guahu, lao mas meggai na makkat na cho'cho' hu fafana' gi i mamaila na sakkan Para bai hu honora este na sen gatbo na tano', malago' yu' na bei hu "post" guini magi i palabras para i ofisiat na kanta-na i isla. I na'an-na i anthem Luta "I Tano'-Mami." Estague i palabras:  *********** I Tano’-mami I Tano’-mami I Tano’-mami ti dangkolu na isla, Lao sumen gatbo todu i uriya I manaina yan todu i familia Hu diseseha nah u li’e’. Todu nu hu gofli’e’ Guini gi islan Luta KORU Dikike’ na isla, bensiyon yan bunitum, I ladera-na kahulo’, kulan gua’ot para’isu, Ha fa’t

I hiked to Pagat this morning and it was the perfect experience to start an arbitrary unit of time with. There were light showers throughout the hike. The skies were beautiful and blue. The waters of the freshwater cave were calming and relaxing. After weeks and months of so much chaos and pain in my life it felt like the start that I needed. This morning was a reminder that even if things seem so tough and impossible, the healing touch of sacred waters, the inviting blue of new skies and the freshness of the air mixing with rains, all of it holds the promise that things can get better.