I meant to make this post like a week ago but better late then never I guess! So here’s the Do’s and Don’ts for intersex representation. 

Do: 

1) Have the intersex character be human. This feels like a kind of weird thing to point out, but seriously, almost all the “intersex” representation that we have is of nonhuman, alien, magical creatures who are magically a third sex that doesn’t even exist in humans. This gets really tiring and othering after a while just cause like. Only ever seeing yourself represented as nonhuman starts to make you feel like your intersex condition makes you less then human! So just. please stay away from calling nonhuman/alien creatures intersex.

2) Research an actual intersex condition and give your character an intersex condition that exists in real life. https://www.intersexequality.com/intersex-variations-list/ This link is not a complete list, but it’s a start. Actually look up a real condition, see what the symptoms are, and create a character that could actually exist in real life. 

3) Use the term intersex when referring to intersex characters! This seems like it should be obvious, but so much of the representation I see just either only refers to the intersex character as having their specific condition and never mentioning the word intersex, or by just describing their genitals or body in an invasive way and never mentioning the word intersex! Just use the word intersex to describe intersex characters. It’s not that hard. 

4) Recognize that being intersex is not the same thing as being trans. Many intersex people are trans, but being intersex doesn’t mean that you’re inherently trans. Intersex people often have a complicated relationship with gender, but they can still identify as cis, or any gender identity. 

5) Have an intersex character who’s entire identity isn’t just being intersex. Being intersex is a large part of of a lot of intersex people’s lives, and that absolutely should be represented, but if your character’s only character trait is that they’re intersex that. isn’t good. I would love to see intersex characters who are just existing and doing normal things and they’re also intersex. 

Don’t:

1) Describe your intersex character’s genitals in a weird fetishizing way. You really really don’t need to describe the character’s genitals at all in the vast majority of situations, so just Please Don’t because you’re going to do it wrong. 

2) Treat the medical community like they’re experts on intersex issues. The intersex community and intersex activists have very different beliefs and goals then then medical community, and in fact a lot of intersex activism is against the medical community, especially to do with nonconsensual surgery. 

3) Exploit intersex trauma. Pretty much every intersex person I know has trauma surrounded with the fact that they’re intersex, and many, many intersex people have faced medical abuse. I’m not saying that you should exclude these types of things from intersex stories, because this is a big part of intersex people’s lives and stories, but think critically about the way you include these sort of things and why you’re including them. Also, I’m not sure if I trust perisex/dyadic people to write stories about intersex people who had surgery performed on them at birth, or on the topic of intersex surgery in general, so maybe avoid writing stories where the main focus is intersex surgery, because I don’t think you’ll get that right. 

4) Use slurs to describe intersex characters. Seeing the h-slur thrown casually around hurts a lot of intersex people, and there’s really no reason for it to be included unless the intersex character is reclaiming it, but again, that’s not a viewpoint I feel comfortable with dyadic/perisex authors writing. 

5) Make being intersex seen as only a tragedy. Finding out that you’re intersex can be scary and stressful, but the only intersex stories out there seem to be ones focused on how sad and awful the intersex character’s life is going to be now. I would love to see intersex characters who have intersex pride, who are involved with the intersex community, who do activism, who have people that care about them and a happy ending! Only ever seeing people like you represented as a tragedy with no happy future is tough, and I really would just love to see one intersex story where the intersex character isn’t completely miserable all the time. 

This is just kind of a basic overview of things to keep in mind while writing intersex characters, and honestly my biggest advice would be to research and read stuff written by intersex people! And after you’ve written something, get an intersex sensitivity reader to give input. 

I’m only one intersex person and I don’t have all the answers, so other intersex people please feel free to add on or disagree.