kansascity-marshwiggle:
urbanfantasyinspiration:
I like the idea of a cop character who looks and acts like he’s in the Mob.
>He acts SUPER Italian
>He always has some cousin that can help them out on a case (either as an informant or they can fix up a car or whatever) and they’re all different people, but they’re all named Tony
>Whenever he’s interrogating a suspect he always does borderline mob shit like “it sure would be a shame if something were to happen”.
>Hair and fashion sense are 10/10
>Slugger
>His Captain is requesting background checks on him every few months and while he can’t find any connections, it just keeps coming up
Idk. I think it would be a good running gag
Like, he just happens to have a very extensive, close-knit, well-connected family who have nothing whatsoever to do with the Mafia?
Exactly. And he himself doesn’t do anything illegal, he’s a good cop, but he still has the same rhythms and mannerisms of a Mafia enforcer. Like, he only listens to Sinatra on stakeouts, he has connections out the wazoo in Little Italy, he’s super intimidating and he postures constantly. He has regular dinners with his family, his dad is the patriarch who runs a /completely legitimate/ pizza joint.
And the jokes always come from him saying and doing things that, taken out of context, you would think is mob related. Like “I gotta do a favor for my uncle” and he buys a bunch of saws and hammers and everything, drives away all ominously, except then you find out he’s building his uncle a deck.
Or one of his coworkers has some trouble with their sink and he goes “I got somebody who can take care of that for ya” real intimidating like. And a day later this humongous italian guy (named Tony, of course) shows up and the coworker thinks he’s gonna get whacked, but Tony just holds up a toolbox and goes “I heard you had some trouble with your sink?” really polite and everything.
I’m just in love with how close you could make that without going over the line. He gives his squad a heart attack every few days but he always shows up with fresh cannoli.
His family calls him “Vinny the Mangler” or something, but it’s because he can’t cut up a piece of meat without absolutely destroying it