A picture of Eddie Cochran obviously, said Charity Chic in response to my request for songs with the name Edward, Eddie or Ed in them. And as he wrote obviously rather than "obvs", I went with his suggestion.
Of course, there were many other famous musical Edwards I could have gone with, including the recently departed Eddie Van Halen, Ed Tudor-Pole, Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeroes (from George), Edward Ball, Eddie & The Hotrods, Eddie Vedder, Eddie Floyd, Eddie Boyd, Eddie Jones, Charles & Eddie (from Alyson), Eddie Rabbit, Eddie Kirk, Eddie Fisher, Eddie Holland, Eddie Money (see this week's Saturday Snapshots), Eddie Kendricks... the list goes on and on. But did any of them ever record a song as iconic as this...?
Eddie Cochran - Summertime Blues
All due respect, but I don't think so.
And yes, George, Eddi Reader was disqualified for being a girl. Harsh but true.
Eddi Reader - Patience Of Angels
Oops. How did that get in there?
Also disqualified were any Teds or Teddies... which I take as being short for Theodore. Either way, maybe they'll make an appearance here one day.
Lynchie, however, offers the oddest musical Edward...
Principal Edwards Magic Theatre - Over and Out
Trippy.
Whereas Swiss Adam directs us to Edward Barton, the poet responsible for this little ditty, originally recorded by his girlfriend Jane (long before Opus 3 got their mucky dance paws all over it)...
That's quite lovely.
Anyway, that's not why we're here. We're here to celebrates songs about Edwards (or at least songs that mention them). So let's get cracking, because there's loads to go at...
Let's start with Jim in Dubai...
Nine Steps to Ugly - Eddie Lopez Lives in Slough
John Hegley - Eddie Don't Like Furniture
Does this count?
No, but it's a great tune.
The Medium - Edward Never Lies
Four brilliant suggestions... but, incredibly, they weren't the best Jim had to offer. Keep reading to hear those!
Lynchie, meanwhile, gave us this beauty.
Drive-By Truckers - Where's Eddie?
Jason Isbell's ex-wife, Shonna Tucker, on vocals there. Sadly, she left the Truckers a few years after Jason did.
Rigid Digit, meanwhile, was quite restrained this week, offering only this little gem...
Weird Al Yankovic - My Baby's In Love With Eddie Vedder
And continuing on a pretty-boy rock star vibe, RD added...
Iron Maiden's omnipresent/ever changing mascot is called Eddie. He has given his name to a Maiden-based video game and a compilation album (both titled Ed Hunter)...
Coincidentally, my millennial hipster politico friend, Ben, recommended this (from the album Ed Hunter) as his favourite Maiden track this week.
Ben also put forward this...
...which... well, I hope you'll excuse me if I steal an explanation from elsewhere on t'internet...
This song tells the story of the beginnings of British heavy metal band Iron Maiden, personified as a gay love triangle between original lead singer Paul Di'Anno, Eddie (“Eddie the Head,” the band’s mascot who appears on their album covers, and in this song represents the band as a whole), and Bruce Dickinson, the band’s second singer who replaced Paul in 1981.
Fat Mike explains:
I was just thinking that some of their songs are so good and they were just so cool when they had Paul Di’Anno in the band. Then they got Bruce Dickinson, this falsetto fuck, and for me, it just ruined everything.
Charming. Poor old Bruce D.
Anyway, while we're here with my millennial hipster politico friend, Ben... well, he obviously had some spare time on his hands this week. His short-list was almost longer than mine...
Small Faces - Eddie's Dreaming
(Also suggested by Walter, who seems to have a scarily similar record collection to MHPF.)
Curtis Mayfield - Eddie, You Should Know Better
That was on my list too.
Which was disqualified because it only makes lyrical reference to a watery eddy. And also, I remain unconvinced by Grizzly Bear.
The Vandals - The Legend of Pat Brown
My weekly punk submission.
If you really want to know who Patrick Edward Brown was, you'll have to read this.
Blind Willie McTell - King Edward Blues
If you've not got a ragtime song in your list, is it even a good list?
Are you sure that's not a song about potatoes? I guess I shouldn't be surprised, suggested as it was by a vegan.
Of Montreal - An Introduction for Isabell
I was about to file that with Grizzly Bear, but it wasn't half bad.
Propagandhi - I Was A Pre-Teen McCarthyist
Second punk song and also very timely.
I told you he was a politico. Not a bad song though. However, I think the lyrical reference is to a surname, which are disqualified.
Death Grips - Black Quarterback
Have to live up to this idea you have of me as a hipster!
Is that what hipsters listen to then? My current (not for much longer!) next door neighbour is a hipster and he blasts out Snow Patrol. I'm not convinced hipsters have set musical affiliations. I may be wrong.
Anyway, I have no idea what Death Grips are on about, but there were quite a few Eddies in there. Including the great Ed 'Lou Grant' Asner. God knows why.
Ghostface Killah - Three Bricks
Biggie did this as well but... Wu Tang forever.
Sigh. Millennials.
Edward Scissor hands them grams...
(Walter prefers the Biggie version.)
Ah, but wait, the mention of Edward Scissorhands allows us to zip over to Canada, where Douglas has a related suggestion...
Just one to put forward for your consideration, to prevent the lost from getting out of hand: the always delightful Lucksmiths with the song "Edward, Sandwich Hand". Delightful wordplay and a whistling riff to hook you into the chorus.
The Lucksmiths - Edward Sandwich Hand
Back to Ben's long list...
Almost breaking the Song For Whoever rule, that one.
Bomb The Music Industry! - Bike Test 1 2 3
Any opportunity for Jeff Rosenstock!
Jeff Rosenstock is someone who Ben introduced me to a while back. He produces some very cool tunes (if occasionally a little too loud for these aged ears) and has a strange attitude to the music industry in that he seems not too interested in making any money out of it. For example, you can get his latest collection of songs from Bandcamp... but he doesn't want your money.
Please do not feel obliged to spend money on this music. I do not intend for it to be monetized. Any money that comes in through Bandcamp for these songs will be donated to charitable causes, but less money will get taken out if you just do that directly on your own - which I encourage you to do if you can afford it. And if not, it's cool.
Anyway, there's another Edwards Scissorhands reference in the track above, if you can dig it out.
Which brings us, finally, to Walter, who also appeared to have a bit of spare time on his hands this week...
All I know by them is Radio Africa, but I liked that.
TV Personalities - Bright Sunny Smiles
(That's a little scary.)
Just by Montague street
His friend Eddie he did the respray
So he couldn't drive it all last week
And it cost most of the money
That he had saved up
To pay Eddie's receipt
But he figures it's worth it
Cause the disguise is a must
When they go missing
They're gonna look for the van first
She whispers slowly "it'll be alright"
I took some cash from my building society
And my monthly check came in just right
If only they knew they weren't giving it away
That came very close to making the ten, Walter. As did this...
The Smiths - Suffer Little Children
Tonight will be your very last night
Don't worry though, some of your other suggestions really hit home. But no, Ed fROMOHIO, singer and guitarist of fIREHOSE doesn't get a mention, if only because of his abuse of the CAPS LOCK key.
OK, time to scrap the barnacles off the side of the boat. Here's the rest of the long-list from my hard-drive this week...
Saint Etienne - Edward Undecided
Emmy The Great - Edward Is Dedward
The Divine Comedy - Edward The Confessor
Kris Kristofferson - Eddie The Eunuch
Sucking like a super star
Slicker than a shoe-shine
Quicker than a two-time
Eddie what a thang you are
Eddie makes a damn good livin', baby
Putting other people down
Ah yes, songs hitting back at music critics... there's got to be a Top Ten in that somewhere.
I almost put this one in the Top Ten just to irk the musos.
Jason Ringenberg - Eddie Rode The Orphan Train
The Darkness - She's Just A Girl, Eddie
The Crystals - I Love You, Eddie (but so does Betty!)
Meat Loaf - Eddie's Teddy (from The Rocky Horror Picture Show)
The Teen Queens - Eddie, My Love
Ist - The Wreck Of The Eddie Fitzpatrick
Give that one a spin because it only has 13 views on youtube and it deserves more.
The Glam Chops - Tell Us, Are You Ready, Eddie?
Featuring Eddie Argos from Art Brut and David Devant (minus His Spirit Wife). Only available on MySpace, it seems. (I know, I didn't even know MySpace was still a thing either.)
I would much rather have heard David Bowie singing "A horse is a horse, of course, of course..." Sadly, it was not to be.
Jack Lukeman - Ode To Ed Wood
But which Edwards made this week's Top Ten?
Let's find out...
Let's kick off with this one, as suggested by Swiss Adam, seconded by George, and thirded by my MHPF, Ben.
Quality Fall track, Adam, said George, and who am I to disagree?
DIY? Is this an ode to putting up Ikea furniture?
Maybe not...
9. Heinz - Just Like Eddie / Stray Cats - Gene & Eddie
I'm cheating a bit putting these two together, but Charity Chic suggested them both and they complement each other very well.
Nominated by Swiss Adam.
Ben, added...
Pixies (after they lost the definitive) - Another Toe In The Ocean
7. Wayne County & The Electric Chairs - Eddie & Sheena
Oh and there's 'Eddie & Sheena' by Wayne County & The Electric Chairs, says C, one of the first bands I ever saw down at our little local club when I was 14 (Wayne was quite something to behold, especially in 1978) and they gave everyone a free Eddie & Sheena badge at the door - soon to be defiantly pinned to my school blazer of course!
Top suggestion, C, from the band that also brought us If You Don't Wanna Fuck Me, Baby - Baby, Fuck Off. Which was apparently the first ever record Jools Holland played piano on.
6. It's Immaterial - Ed's Funky Diner
One of my fav songs, love it, says Jim in Dubai.
They didn't just drive away from home, you know!
The tale of Edward Mondrake, the "man with two faces", sympathetically chronicled by Tom.
Jim wins the prize for Best Song I've Never Heard Before Today With The Name Edward In It.
Keep 'em coming, Jim!
3. Billy Joel - Scenes From An Italian Restaurant
I'm always too late here nowadays, says Alyson, so will get in quick with a name-check. Brenda and Eddie - Scenes From An Italian Restaurant by Billy Joel.
A seemingly throwaway suggestion, though in the process Alyson has stuck a pin in one of my all-time favourite Billy Joel songs. (I feel my love of Billy Joel has recently been vindicated by Hughie in The Boys. If you know, you know.)
You have to wait for the tempo change, but Brenda and Eddie play an important role in this song...
I'll obv(iou)s(ly) go for Sleeper - Nice Guy Eddie, said Martin (courting disaster with his barely hidden attempt at evoking the yoof-speak I banned last week), and not just because I'd listen to Louise sing the phone book ;)
Nice Guy Eddie, of course, turned out to be not such a nice guy after all...
Most weeks this would have been Number One, as I share a similar devotion to the divine Ms. Wener as Martin. However...
This week's winner is going to be one of those where I'm biased and play to my favourites, but thankfully Walter was with me...
1. Bruce Springsteen - Meeting Across The River
Amid all the rock 'n' roll bombast of the greatest album of the 70s comes this quiet slice of desperate lowlife storytelling set over a haunting, noirish solo from jazz trumpeter Randy Brecker. And Roy Bittan's characteristic piano playing and another jazz musician, Richard Davis, on double bass.
It doesn't sound like anything else on the album (although lyrically, it follows similar themes), but it's perfectly placed as an intimate pause for breath as the penultimate track on side two before the epic finale of Jungleland.
The obvious E for a girl's name would have been Emily, but it turns out I already did that here...
And so...
NEXT WEEK: OUR TOP TEN EMMA SONGS
