If you ever happen to find yourself in Waskom, Texas, a tiny burg across the Louisiana state line off I-20, a place best described as "twister bait," you might wanna head on over to the Great American Mural that covers the front of the We Buy Houses 123 building in the middle of town. It's a mighty huge thing, what with its portrayal of the Twin Towers at the World Trade Center in a dull, gray New York City; an extraordinarily masculine Statue of Liberty; and images of Waskom's heroes, including the fire chief and Turbo, a local dog who has two purple hearts from his time in Afghanistan. This is not to mention the aircraft and helicopter on there, the Iwo Jima part, and more.
It's charming in a hyper-nationalist way. It looks like if Shepard Fairey went bankrupt and figured he'd grift the rubes for some quick cash.
Yeah, they love them some Uhmerka there in Waskom. I bet all 2200 of the locals just love the fuck out of Uhmerka. And the Waskom City Council decided to prove just how fucking much they love Uhmerka by passing a local law that defies the U.S. Supreme Court, which is absent from the mural.
Yup, the five-white-guy council unanimously voted to ban abortion in Waskom, except in cases of "rape, incest or serious risk to the mother's life." It's obviously a completely unenforceable, utterly useless law. But Waskom won't be shown up by those uppity states like Alabama and Mississippi. The council declared Waskom a "sanctuary city for the unborn," which, get it?, is a totally hilarious slap in the face to sanctuary cities for undocumented immigrants. Take that, libtards.
(Question: If an undocumented immigrant in Waskom is pregnant and a fetus is a person at the time of conception, is the fetus now American? If not, is Waskom a sanctuary city for the undocumented unborn? I need to know the limitations here.)
The country is going through a period of peak madness about abortion rights. I was on the phone with a pal in a deep red part of North Carolina last night who said he generally tries to avoid talking politics down there, but he found himself in a conversation about it with a man, an acquaintance from Virginia. The man said he didn't understand how anyone could vote for Democrats because we allow doctors to take babies who are just born and kill them with a brick.
My response was "Ok, first off, that's fucking insane. Second, a brick? Who needs that mess? Babies are easier to kill with your bare hands."
Apparently, the man explained, New York passed a law that said it was cool to commit infanticide by brick. My pal said to the man, "Yeah, that's not in there. Did you read the New York law?" No, the man said, but he had heard. "That's your problem," my pal explained. "You heard. You don't know."
But no one gives a shit about science and reality. I regularly get people telling me on the Twitter machine that liberals support murdering newborns. That's where the conversation on abortion is right now for too fucking many Americans. In other words, there is no conversation. When people wholeheartedly believe something that is completely, patently, blatantly untrue, your puny facts aren't going to put a dent in that level of delusional stupidity.
Waskom, Texas, doesn't have a clinic that performs abortions. The nearest one is across the state line, in Shreveport, Louisiana, about 30 miles away. It's over 160 miles to the one in Dallas. So no woman is going to get an abortion in Waskom that she doesn't induce herself. And the jury's still out on whether that means Killion's Pharmacy is gonna carry the morning after pill. Either way, abortion isn't a an issue in Waskom.
What is a problem there is meth. They found e coli in the town's water source. There have been at least two murders this year, which gives Waskom a higher murder rate than most of the big cities in the United States, as well as a number of assaults.
Like so many other places in this damned land, the yahoos have been convinced that something that isn't an issue at all must take precedent over real issues. That protecting a fetus is more important than securing the lives of the actually living. Here is how one Waskom resident put it on Facebook: "The Town of Waskom agreed to run the city according to the will of God in regards to the Right To Life. We expect to be challenged but God is on our side so we have faith that every challenge will be overcome with prayer and steady faithfulness to do the Lord's Will."
You gotta know what you're up against. Your Twitter or Insta feeds aren't gonna tell you that. This shit is out there and it's nuts. They think we're bashing in babies' heads with bricks. You're not gonna convince that person that they're wrong. You're not gonna rationalize and present reasonable counter arguments. You gotta write them off for now and concentrate on shoring up the power of the sane people.
6/13/2019
Trump: Let's Do Some Collusion, Motherfuckers
President Chucklefuck McBloatface had multiple reasons for telling ABC News's George Stephanopoulos that he'd gobble up information from a foreign government about his political opponent in 2020 like an eager cum whore swallows jizz at a Pride Month circle jerk. First, if he said that he'd go to the FBI, he'd be admitting that he or Jared "Dead Boy Eyes" Kushner or "good young man" Donald Trump, Jr., did something wrong when they were offered (checks notes) information from a foreign government about his political opponent in 2016. And this vile shithead would never say he was wrong.
This is part of the strategy of declaring, repeatedly, that what was laid out in the Mueller report wasn't a crime on the Trump campaign's part, that whether or not there was "collusion" was besides the point. A few months ago, Rudy Giuliani, pausing while drinking the blood of an infant, stated flatly that taking information from a foreign government, even if that information was stolen, was not criminal. The only reason Mueller didn't charge Dead Eyes or Good Young Man with a crime is because he's pretty sure they were too fucking stupid to know that what they were doing by meeting with Russians was a crime.
One thing Trump said was kind of interesting. He compared getting this information to "oppo research," and that's led throbbing assholes like Lindsey Graham to speciously compare it to the Steele dossier, which brought the connection between Trump and Russia to the FBI's attention (via John McCain). While trying to split this really wide hair (research on an opponent that a candidate contracts someone to do is not the same as Syria showing up and saying, "I've got emails we stole. Let's have a secret meeting and boogie"), Trump said, "I would guarantee you that 90 percent, could be 100 percent, of the congressmen or the senators over there, have had meetings--if they didn’t they probably wouldn’t be elected-- on negative information about their opponent." When pressed by Stephanopoulos on even if the meetings were with agents of foreign countries, Trump said, "Possibly. Possibly. But they don’t call the FBI. You don’t call the FBI every time you hear something that maybe--now, you see the people."
Now, you could look at this as Trump covering his ass after he said he'd commit a crime. But another way to see that comment on members of Congress is as a threat. Because if the only people who can do anything to stop him are in Congress, then you can sure as shit bet that he's gonna let them know that they're gonna go down with him if they gun for him on this. Yeah, I think that was a warning that he's got the goods on (most likely) Republicans and the help they've gotten from other nations. I think that was him saying that they better build a wall with their bodies around him or he'll burn it all down before he takes the fall.
Of course, Trump was also announcing to the world that he's open for business. "C'mon, China and Russia, grab me by the pussy," Trump was saying, "I love it." You only do that shit if you're already in so far deep that it doesn't fucking matter anymore. And you're an idiot. So it's clearly Trumpian.
A couple of Republicans have spoken out to say, "Well, gee, that's not right." And Democrats have fumed a mighty fume and even tried to get a law passed that did something that doesn't matter because it was blocked by sentient turdpile Mitch McConnell.
That last part is particularly galling because Democrats should be going to fucking war today. See, one other thing that Trump did in the interview that hasn't really been reported is that he once again accused Hillary Clinton and Democrats of committing crimes. Yeah, that's right. Right after admitting that he didn't give a shit if he or any politician breaks the law, he got all self-righteous about Clinton again. In one of his verbal diarrhea blasts, Trump said, "She deleted 33,000 emails from--sent by the United States Congress. They gave a subpoena to Hillary Clinton for 33,000 emails. After the subpoena was gotten, she deleted them. That’s called obstruction. And her lawyer should also be looked at because her lawyer--she’s got to have the greatest lawyer on earth because she does that, he did the deleting, supposedly. Not only did they delete, but they acid washed them."
We don't need to go through all the lies in that. And while Trump didn't specifically say that Clinton should be in jail, he did tell Stephanopoulos, "If you did that, you would’ve been put in jail."
Jesus fuck, Democrats, at least have the guts to defend your own.
(Note: If your reaction to this is that the United States interferes in foreign elections and we're just getting payback, well, you are so very smart. Have a cookie. And shut the fuck up because a whole hell of a lot of us think that meddling in other countries' elections is wrong no matter who does it.)
This is part of the strategy of declaring, repeatedly, that what was laid out in the Mueller report wasn't a crime on the Trump campaign's part, that whether or not there was "collusion" was besides the point. A few months ago, Rudy Giuliani, pausing while drinking the blood of an infant, stated flatly that taking information from a foreign government, even if that information was stolen, was not criminal. The only reason Mueller didn't charge Dead Eyes or Good Young Man with a crime is because he's pretty sure they were too fucking stupid to know that what they were doing by meeting with Russians was a crime.
One thing Trump said was kind of interesting. He compared getting this information to "oppo research," and that's led throbbing assholes like Lindsey Graham to speciously compare it to the Steele dossier, which brought the connection between Trump and Russia to the FBI's attention (via John McCain). While trying to split this really wide hair (research on an opponent that a candidate contracts someone to do is not the same as Syria showing up and saying, "I've got emails we stole. Let's have a secret meeting and boogie"), Trump said, "I would guarantee you that 90 percent, could be 100 percent, of the congressmen or the senators over there, have had meetings--if they didn’t they probably wouldn’t be elected-- on negative information about their opponent." When pressed by Stephanopoulos on even if the meetings were with agents of foreign countries, Trump said, "Possibly. Possibly. But they don’t call the FBI. You don’t call the FBI every time you hear something that maybe--now, you see the people."
Now, you could look at this as Trump covering his ass after he said he'd commit a crime. But another way to see that comment on members of Congress is as a threat. Because if the only people who can do anything to stop him are in Congress, then you can sure as shit bet that he's gonna let them know that they're gonna go down with him if they gun for him on this. Yeah, I think that was a warning that he's got the goods on (most likely) Republicans and the help they've gotten from other nations. I think that was him saying that they better build a wall with their bodies around him or he'll burn it all down before he takes the fall.
Of course, Trump was also announcing to the world that he's open for business. "C'mon, China and Russia, grab me by the pussy," Trump was saying, "I love it." You only do that shit if you're already in so far deep that it doesn't fucking matter anymore. And you're an idiot. So it's clearly Trumpian.
A couple of Republicans have spoken out to say, "Well, gee, that's not right." And Democrats have fumed a mighty fume and even tried to get a law passed that did something that doesn't matter because it was blocked by sentient turdpile Mitch McConnell.
That last part is particularly galling because Democrats should be going to fucking war today. See, one other thing that Trump did in the interview that hasn't really been reported is that he once again accused Hillary Clinton and Democrats of committing crimes. Yeah, that's right. Right after admitting that he didn't give a shit if he or any politician breaks the law, he got all self-righteous about Clinton again. In one of his verbal diarrhea blasts, Trump said, "She deleted 33,000 emails from--sent by the United States Congress. They gave a subpoena to Hillary Clinton for 33,000 emails. After the subpoena was gotten, she deleted them. That’s called obstruction. And her lawyer should also be looked at because her lawyer--she’s got to have the greatest lawyer on earth because she does that, he did the deleting, supposedly. Not only did they delete, but they acid washed them."
We don't need to go through all the lies in that. And while Trump didn't specifically say that Clinton should be in jail, he did tell Stephanopoulos, "If you did that, you would’ve been put in jail."
Jesus fuck, Democrats, at least have the guts to defend your own.
(Note: If your reaction to this is that the United States interferes in foreign elections and we're just getting payback, well, you are so very smart. Have a cookie. And shut the fuck up because a whole hell of a lot of us think that meddling in other countries' elections is wrong no matter who does it.)
6/12/2019
Proposal: Stop Being Assholes About Immigration
Admittedly, it was an intentionally provocative comment I made yesterday in a group of people who didn't want to talk about politics. Someone had brought up how she hates Trump, other were telling her to keep it to herself, and so I said, "Well, for me, it comes down to this: You're either pro-babies in cages or you're anti-babies in cages. I happen to be anti. That shouldn't be a controversial position."
"Where are babies in cages?" another woman asked.
"We're keeping kids and babies in camps," I said, surprised that she didn't know this. "The United States. We've put kids in large cages. We just have."
A man said, "What should we do with them?"
For me, the answer was obvious. "Not put them in cages," I responded.
A second man said, "You know how many women get raped by the coyotes who are taking them across the deserts to here? Women and young girls take contraception because they know they're going to be raped." And then he started talking about rape trees, which you can look up if you want.
I said, "What's your point? That migrants are treated shitty when they're trying to get to the United States? That at least we're not raping them? Just because someone else hurts people worse doesn't mean we get a pass on hurting them less. We should be better. Way better." And I went off on how, after the torture of Iraqi prisoners and detainees by American soldiers was revealed, some people would say shit like "You should see how they treat them in Syria or Saudi Arabia," as if the fact that we're not ripping off fingernails excuses our waterboarding.
Basically, though, my point was to stop putting babies or, hell, anybody who hasn't committed a crime in a cage. And let's be as absolutely fucking clear as can be: if you travel to the United States and present yourself at a port of entry to ask for asylum, you are not committing a crime. And if you cross into the US elsewhere and ask for asylum when border agents pick you and your family up, you've committed at most a misdemeanor, illegal entry.
The nihilistic policies of the Trump administration, which basically come down to "Give us money or fuck you," whether it has to do with climate change or with aid to Central American countries, are helping to drive the rise in migrants. In other words, we are fucking up the lives of people whose lives are so fucked up that they would rather face a journey filled with potential violence and being put in a cage or concentration camp than face the starvation, violence, and misery of their homes. They're so desperate that they're crossing the flood-swollen Rio Grande River and canals near El Paso, Texas, and some are likely dying right there at the border.
So maybe we could stop that last part. Maybe we could stop being assholes, at least to the children. Because right now, we're the fucking assholes. That's a choice we're making as a country, to be assholes. We could also choose not to be assholes.
How much are we being assholes? At the Paso del Norte International Bridge in El Paso, over 100 men are being held in what one observer described as a "human dog pound." They're in an open pen in the 100 plus degree heat, and some have been there over a month without a change of clothes or shower. All for not breaking the law.
Kids are supposed to be held for no more than 20 days before being released to family or foster care, but, you know, that's not happening. And professional coprophage Lindsey Graham has proposed extending that to a punitive 100 days on the notion that "the incentives created by our laws will cease to exist;" thus, "This humanitarian disaster will begin to repair itself." Someone tell this milksop motherfucker that people who just walked thousands of miles don't give a fuck about your 100 days.
Again, this is about us. This is about who we are. We are in a situation where the number of migrants has gone up sharply, despite Donald Trump's worthless threats and mad gesticulations and spittle-spraying speeches. We can continue to respond like the assholes we're being by trying to punish our way out of it, opening more and more concentration camps, including a site where Japanese Americans were interred during World War II. We can continue hurtful policies like making migrants wait in Mexico, where they have to stay in crime-ridden border towns and face homelessness and possible deportation if they're forced to stay too long by the backlog of asylum cases in the US.
Or maybe, just maybe we could respond with humanity, with treating them like human beings seeking help and comfort. We could fund the efforts at the border fully in a way that helps migrants. We could act like we're part of a goddamn society and not a bunch of fuckin' savages trying to out-brutal the other savages.
"Where are babies in cages?" another woman asked.
"We're keeping kids and babies in camps," I said, surprised that she didn't know this. "The United States. We've put kids in large cages. We just have."
A man said, "What should we do with them?"
For me, the answer was obvious. "Not put them in cages," I responded.
A second man said, "You know how many women get raped by the coyotes who are taking them across the deserts to here? Women and young girls take contraception because they know they're going to be raped." And then he started talking about rape trees, which you can look up if you want.
I said, "What's your point? That migrants are treated shitty when they're trying to get to the United States? That at least we're not raping them? Just because someone else hurts people worse doesn't mean we get a pass on hurting them less. We should be better. Way better." And I went off on how, after the torture of Iraqi prisoners and detainees by American soldiers was revealed, some people would say shit like "You should see how they treat them in Syria or Saudi Arabia," as if the fact that we're not ripping off fingernails excuses our waterboarding.
Basically, though, my point was to stop putting babies or, hell, anybody who hasn't committed a crime in a cage. And let's be as absolutely fucking clear as can be: if you travel to the United States and present yourself at a port of entry to ask for asylum, you are not committing a crime. And if you cross into the US elsewhere and ask for asylum when border agents pick you and your family up, you've committed at most a misdemeanor, illegal entry.
The nihilistic policies of the Trump administration, which basically come down to "Give us money or fuck you," whether it has to do with climate change or with aid to Central American countries, are helping to drive the rise in migrants. In other words, we are fucking up the lives of people whose lives are so fucked up that they would rather face a journey filled with potential violence and being put in a cage or concentration camp than face the starvation, violence, and misery of their homes. They're so desperate that they're crossing the flood-swollen Rio Grande River and canals near El Paso, Texas, and some are likely dying right there at the border.
So maybe we could stop that last part. Maybe we could stop being assholes, at least to the children. Because right now, we're the fucking assholes. That's a choice we're making as a country, to be assholes. We could also choose not to be assholes.
How much are we being assholes? At the Paso del Norte International Bridge in El Paso, over 100 men are being held in what one observer described as a "human dog pound." They're in an open pen in the 100 plus degree heat, and some have been there over a month without a change of clothes or shower. All for not breaking the law.
Kids are supposed to be held for no more than 20 days before being released to family or foster care, but, you know, that's not happening. And professional coprophage Lindsey Graham has proposed extending that to a punitive 100 days on the notion that "the incentives created by our laws will cease to exist;" thus, "This humanitarian disaster will begin to repair itself." Someone tell this milksop motherfucker that people who just walked thousands of miles don't give a fuck about your 100 days.
Again, this is about us. This is about who we are. We are in a situation where the number of migrants has gone up sharply, despite Donald Trump's worthless threats and mad gesticulations and spittle-spraying speeches. We can continue to respond like the assholes we're being by trying to punish our way out of it, opening more and more concentration camps, including a site where Japanese Americans were interred during World War II. We can continue hurtful policies like making migrants wait in Mexico, where they have to stay in crime-ridden border towns and face homelessness and possible deportation if they're forced to stay too long by the backlog of asylum cases in the US.
Or maybe, just maybe we could respond with humanity, with treating them like human beings seeking help and comfort. We could fund the efforts at the border fully in a way that helps migrants. We could act like we're part of a goddamn society and not a bunch of fuckin' savages trying to out-brutal the other savages.
6/07/2019
Just Stop It: Trump Didn't Rise to Any Damn Occasion in Europe
It's absolutely ludicrous that Donald Trump is getting praise for his appearance at the 75th anniversary of the D-Day invasion in Normandy. Sure, he read a speech that a reasonably eloquent fifth-grader could have written, and he didn't even pause to say how much the property there was worth or how he could have killed Hitler single-handedly with a secret plan he had. Obviously, everyone thought Bumblefuck O'Douchenozzle was gonna saunter up to the lectern, fart into the mic, shit on the gathered leaders, and scream, "Do you love me now, Vladdy?"
But just because he acted vaguely normal, the motherfucker didn't all of a sudden become a goddamn statesman. If our mark of success is now "Oh, good, he didn't teabag the Queen," then nothing really fucking matters anymore.
Besides, in just about every other circumstance, Trump was the blithering cockknob he usually is. He said that the UK's National Health Service would be on the table for trade negotiations (before walking that back since, if true, it would probably end Brexit immediately). He didn't seem to understand that Ireland wasn't part of the UK and that a border wall with Northern Ireland would pretty much lead to an explosion of violence. He insulted Nancy Pelosi and Robert Mueller while talking to Fox "news" by those Normandy graves. And he was fucking obsessed with Queen Elizabeth and the royal family, saying that "There are those that say they have never seen the queen have a better time, a more animated time," and you just think that, if it's true, how fucking awful the queen's life must have been for her first 93 years.
Truly, being royalty who are just figureheads with almost no real power must seem like a dream for Trump. Everyone gives you money and a gold house and all you gotta do is wave from a carriage every now and then? That's a gig. Trump must love that shit.
Hell, in his hell-interview with insufferable twatflea Piers Morgan, Trump fairly jacked off, "I really like the royal family and of course headed by the queen who is a woman like few others." I hope Elizabeth had Her Majesty's Pussy Guard with her at all times to prevent any grabbing.
That interview was filled with weird and ominous and confoundingly dumb things from Trump. At one point, Morgan asked Trump if Prince Charles talked to him about climate change, an issue that Charles has been working on for years. Look at Trump's response: "He's doing this for future generations. He really feels. And this is this is real. He believes that. He wants to have a world that's good for future generations...He doesn't need that. You know he is Prince Charles. He doesn't have to worry about future generations in theory unless he's a very good person who cares about people."
That's some sociopathic shit right there. Most of us would think it's just being a goddamned human being to "worry about future generations." For a narcissistic lump of rotting scrotum skin like Trump, one has to be "a very good person who cares about people" to give a damn what happens to one's descendants.
And, hell, we all know that Trump only views things in his Trumpishly myopic mirror, admiring how incredible he is at all times, but he's so extravagantly narcissistic, like so bad that you'd think every now and then his reflection would say, "Can you give me a fuckin' break for a little while?"
Talking about the military, Trump made it seem like he alone was funding it: "I -- look $700 billion I gave last year and then this year $716 billion." Bitch, that didn't come out of your wallet. We're all fuckin' paying for it.
And when Morgan compared the Trumps to the long history of the royal family and asked, "Would you like to have a 3000-year bloodline?" Trump answered, no shit, "I think it'll be great. I don't know what I'd be doing for the rest of it but I think it would be great." Yeah, he understood the question as Morgan asking him if he'd like to live for 3000 years. God fucking damn, he's dumb.
Trump also reduced everything to money, to how successful people are, to how tough they are as negotiators. Talking about the Vietnam War, which he missed because of (bullshit) bone spurs, he said, "Nobody ever, you know, you're talking about Vietnam and at that time nobody ever heard of the country. Today they're doing very well, in fact on trade they are brutal. They're very brutal." Putting aside the fact that he's admitting he didn't know anything about Vietnam (lots of people had "heard" of it), it's like he wants us to know...what?...now they torture us in trade talks?
The most jarring moment was probably his praise of the gambling ability of the motherfucker who murdered 58 people and injured over 400 in the Las Vegas massacre. The President of the United States said of this white terrorist, "He was actually a pretty smart guy. He was supposedly a good successful gambler and there's almost no such thing as a successful gambler. And he went out and he -- what he did was incredible." I mean, sure, he's one of the biggest mass murderers in history, but, damn, that dude could rock the Texas Hold 'Em table at Caesar's Palace.
Goddamn us for electing this yutz.
Two other things from that bad acid trip of an interview.
First, of course he mentioned his 2016 election. "I had an inauguration, which I have to say was spectacular. And we had a big election night win that was, you know, one of the great evenings," he said. Yes, Gramps, we know. Now tell us again about the time you banged porn stars.
And when Morgan pressed him on banning transgender soldiers from the US military, Trump not only completely upended the supposed (bullshit) justification, which was unit cohesion or some such shit. He punked out and essentially said his hands were tied because of military regulations on drug usage. No, really: "You have very strict rules and regulations on drugs and prescription drugs and all of these different things and they [transgender soldiers] blow it out of the water."
This was one of many, many head-smacking, embarrassing moments on this loony sideshow. Yeah, Trump read a fuckin' speech and didn't accidentally knock over a D-Day veteran. Eisenhower must have been rolling over and over and over in his grave. Patton must have wanted to shove his hand up from the ground and smack Trump's smarmy, wimpy mug. Down in Hell, Hitler must have thought it was good to be represented at the ceremony.
But just because he acted vaguely normal, the motherfucker didn't all of a sudden become a goddamn statesman. If our mark of success is now "Oh, good, he didn't teabag the Queen," then nothing really fucking matters anymore.
Besides, in just about every other circumstance, Trump was the blithering cockknob he usually is. He said that the UK's National Health Service would be on the table for trade negotiations (before walking that back since, if true, it would probably end Brexit immediately). He didn't seem to understand that Ireland wasn't part of the UK and that a border wall with Northern Ireland would pretty much lead to an explosion of violence. He insulted Nancy Pelosi and Robert Mueller while talking to Fox "news" by those Normandy graves. And he was fucking obsessed with Queen Elizabeth and the royal family, saying that "There are those that say they have never seen the queen have a better time, a more animated time," and you just think that, if it's true, how fucking awful the queen's life must have been for her first 93 years.
Truly, being royalty who are just figureheads with almost no real power must seem like a dream for Trump. Everyone gives you money and a gold house and all you gotta do is wave from a carriage every now and then? That's a gig. Trump must love that shit.
Hell, in his hell-interview with insufferable twatflea Piers Morgan, Trump fairly jacked off, "I really like the royal family and of course headed by the queen who is a woman like few others." I hope Elizabeth had Her Majesty's Pussy Guard with her at all times to prevent any grabbing.
That interview was filled with weird and ominous and confoundingly dumb things from Trump. At one point, Morgan asked Trump if Prince Charles talked to him about climate change, an issue that Charles has been working on for years. Look at Trump's response: "He's doing this for future generations. He really feels. And this is this is real. He believes that. He wants to have a world that's good for future generations...He doesn't need that. You know he is Prince Charles. He doesn't have to worry about future generations in theory unless he's a very good person who cares about people."
That's some sociopathic shit right there. Most of us would think it's just being a goddamned human being to "worry about future generations." For a narcissistic lump of rotting scrotum skin like Trump, one has to be "a very good person who cares about people" to give a damn what happens to one's descendants.
And, hell, we all know that Trump only views things in his Trumpishly myopic mirror, admiring how incredible he is at all times, but he's so extravagantly narcissistic, like so bad that you'd think every now and then his reflection would say, "Can you give me a fuckin' break for a little while?"
Talking about the military, Trump made it seem like he alone was funding it: "I -- look $700 billion I gave last year and then this year $716 billion." Bitch, that didn't come out of your wallet. We're all fuckin' paying for it.
And when Morgan compared the Trumps to the long history of the royal family and asked, "Would you like to have a 3000-year bloodline?" Trump answered, no shit, "I think it'll be great. I don't know what I'd be doing for the rest of it but I think it would be great." Yeah, he understood the question as Morgan asking him if he'd like to live for 3000 years. God fucking damn, he's dumb.
Trump also reduced everything to money, to how successful people are, to how tough they are as negotiators. Talking about the Vietnam War, which he missed because of (bullshit) bone spurs, he said, "Nobody ever, you know, you're talking about Vietnam and at that time nobody ever heard of the country. Today they're doing very well, in fact on trade they are brutal. They're very brutal." Putting aside the fact that he's admitting he didn't know anything about Vietnam (lots of people had "heard" of it), it's like he wants us to know...what?...now they torture us in trade talks?
The most jarring moment was probably his praise of the gambling ability of the motherfucker who murdered 58 people and injured over 400 in the Las Vegas massacre. The President of the United States said of this white terrorist, "He was actually a pretty smart guy. He was supposedly a good successful gambler and there's almost no such thing as a successful gambler. And he went out and he -- what he did was incredible." I mean, sure, he's one of the biggest mass murderers in history, but, damn, that dude could rock the Texas Hold 'Em table at Caesar's Palace.
Goddamn us for electing this yutz.
Two other things from that bad acid trip of an interview.
First, of course he mentioned his 2016 election. "I had an inauguration, which I have to say was spectacular. And we had a big election night win that was, you know, one of the great evenings," he said. Yes, Gramps, we know. Now tell us again about the time you banged porn stars.
And when Morgan pressed him on banning transgender soldiers from the US military, Trump not only completely upended the supposed (bullshit) justification, which was unit cohesion or some such shit. He punked out and essentially said his hands were tied because of military regulations on drug usage. No, really: "You have very strict rules and regulations on drugs and prescription drugs and all of these different things and they [transgender soldiers] blow it out of the water."
This was one of many, many head-smacking, embarrassing moments on this loony sideshow. Yeah, Trump read a fuckin' speech and didn't accidentally knock over a D-Day veteran. Eisenhower must have been rolling over and over and over in his grave. Patton must have wanted to shove his hand up from the ground and smack Trump's smarmy, wimpy mug. Down in Hell, Hitler must have thought it was good to be represented at the ceremony.
6/04/2019
Our Government Is a Child Abuser
Of all the terrible fuckery undertaken by the savage cockfleas and cuntmites that make up the administration of awkwardly-dressed dump truck Donald Trump, the most clearly visible, most heinous, most just outright evil is the treatment of migrant children who cross into this country at the southern border. Whether alone or with their parents, they are almost all fleeing horrors - poverty, rape, violence - that are severe enough for them to be sent or taken on the enormous journey from, say, Guatemala to the United States, hoping to God or whoever that they will have a chance to survive in peace.
And while we've never been as high and mighty as our politicians tell us we are, while we've been assholes and fucked up on immigration policy, while we've cruelly been deporting people for minor reasons for years, it was never the actual policy of the United States to abuse children.
Right now, what else can you call the treatment of undocumented migrant children seeking asylum in the United States but child abuse, advocated, aided, and abetted by the federal government?
In the last week, a series of reports has continued to reveal that not only has the Trump administration, especially the Border Patrol, DHS, and HHS, done nothing to reform the mistreatment that occurred previously, but it has continued with the abuse and torture of children under the bullshit umbrella of "detention."
The Washington Post reported that thousands of unaccompanied children, some 12 and younger, are being held in Border Patrol facilities well past the three days that they are supposed to be held before they are released to HHS and the Office of Refugee Relocation to find them places to stay, whether with family already in the United States or foster families. And if you're thinking, "Well, a few extra days won't hurt anyone," here's what the Post said they saw on a visit to the border: "Adults and their toddler children were packed into concrete holding cells, many of them sleeping head-to-foot on the floor and along the wall-length benches....Outside in the parking lot, a chain-link fence enclosure held dozens of women and children, many of them eschewing the air-conditioned tents to lie on the pavement."
The Huffington Post reported that, at one detention facility in Homestead, Florida, according to a lawsuit recently filed, "Immigrant children described being put in isolation for eight days, deprived of physical touch and constantly sobbing." You're not allowed to touch anyone, not even a hug; you are watched by cameras at all times; you get two 10-minute calls with family a week, and tough shit if no one answers. They are living in a prison under prison-like rules without having even been accused of a crime. (Remember: It's totally legal to come here and ask for asylum.)
NBC News reported that documents they've obtained show the utter incompetence and chaos that raged when Trump's DHS was forced to reunify children with parents they had been forcefully separated from under the inhumane "Zero Tolerance" policy. These motherfuckers never had any intention of getting families back together; they wanted to punish people for daring to bring their brown, bedraggled asses to darken our virgin white City on a Hill. It was so bad that, outside one adult detention center in Texas, vans filled with children as young as five were backed up because they didn't have the people to process them. The kids were locked in the July 2018 Texas heat in the vans. "Not until 39 hours later — after two nights in a van — did the last child step out of a van to be reunited. Most spent at least 23 hours in the vehicles," the report says.
This aligns perfectly with the cruel revelation that few records were kept identifying which kids, some of whom are babies and toddlers, went with which families. It's taken nearly a year to get most of the couple of thousand kids reunited with their parents and loved ones. But they still haven't been able to do so for a few dozen. And it's not that their parents are criminals or some such shit. The government just don't know how to reunite them.
And this is not to mention the dead kids.
Or the fact that Trump wants to expand the detention centers into larger, full-fledged concentration camps rather than just release people on their own recognizance, the vast, vast majority of whom do show up for their court dates on asylum.
There's more. There's always more. About newborns separated from their mothers. About sexual abuse of kids in the detention centers. Mostly, it's about treating one category of humans as sub-human. Which, you know, is how racism works.
I'm tired of the quotidian cruelty of our leaders. The blithe assertion of brute power is one of the ugliest aspects of the grotesquely ugly ideology of conservatism. And to assert it over poor, sick, terrified kids in a nation we're constantly told is the richest, greatest, best in the history of the world just means that those leading it are abject, irredeemable dicks.
The faces of these kids should be part of any campaign against Republicans. They should have to answer for it. Because we should demand to not be a part of a country that thinks this shit is okay.
5/31/2019
Two Days After Mueller's Statement, the Path Is Clearer Than Ever
There's one thing that the Democratic Party doesn't get. It's something that individual Democrats understand quite well and they reap the rewards from it. And it goes like this: People want to follow fighters. You can add to that: The fight needs to be absolutely clear. That can be policy based, as in Medicare for All or, if you're a fucking lying prickscab, "Mexico will pay for the wall." But it can also be tactical.
See, Democrats can have all the hearings they want. They can have all the subpoena fights the judicial system can handle. A dozen committees and subcommittees can have witnesses and experts testify about the criminality of the Trump administration. But no one is gonna give a single shit about those things except all the assholes who are constantly checking Twitter to see who "destroyed" who in a 3-minute video. (Note: Yeah, I'm one of those assholes, and it has made me seek the comfort of vicodin and vodka, a V&V cocktail that can straight murder you if you're not careful.)
What people can get their heads around is a single, simple concept: impeachment. It crystallizes all that other shit into a concept that is analogous to "fight." As in, "Holy Christ, Democrats are finally gonna stop being such punk-ass bitches and actually fight this dumb orange motherfucker who is wrecking the joint. About fuckin' time."
I fucking guarantee that as soon as an impeachment inquiry is opened, Democrats will be jizzing themselves so hard that they'll do anything to keep that orgasm going. The excitement it would elicit in the left and a good deal of the center would be akin to a surfer hitting the barrel of a wave just right. Jesus, what a feeling. I fucking guarantee that polling on support for impeachment would go up immediately. That's why it's called "leadership." You go first and others follow. And the right would lose its fucking mind, which would be as delicious as eating whipped cream off an angel's nipple.
Look, there is only one rational conclusion to draw from Special Counsel and not-the-hero-we-needed Robert Mueller's weird statement on Wednesday. I say "weird" because it could seem like he was just casting some bones and telling us to read their prophecies. And he delivered it in a nervous, exhausted tone that said he just wanted to go fishing already. But, still, what he was saying was pretty fuckin' clear: Russia interfered in our elections, and, holy fuckballs, why aren't we doing anything about that? And President Donald Trump sure as shit obstructed the investigation.
I mean, seriously, you have to be willingly obfuscating or so slobberingly brainwashed that you eat and shit MAGA to misunderstand Mueller. Or you have to be guilty. "[I]f we had had confidence that the president clearly did not commit a crime," Mueller said, "we would have said so." And then in the very next part, he said why he couldn't therefore say the president did commit a crime: because of the bullshit Department of Justice memorandum. In other words, the president committed a crime, and so did a lot of others. But he can't just say that.
Why didn't Mueller say, "Fuck it. Impeach the motherfucker already"? Because I fucking promise you they would have punished him. They'd have taken away his pension or some such shit because he violated DOJ policy. It would have been a battle. No matter what globular Attorney General and Man Most Likely to Be Trump's Footrest William Barr says now about how Mueller could have indicted Trump, if Mueller had, they would have done everything in their cynical, foul power to wreck him because that's what they do.
The other thing is that Mueller is a Republican, and he likely honestly believed that Republicans would do the right thing because, and it can't be said enough, the motherfucking Russians interfered in our election to harm one specific candidate, Hillary Clinton, and get another specific candidate, Donald Trump, elected. If Mueller has faith in the GOP to act honorably, then that is his tragic flaw.
But let's return for one moment to the findings of the Special Counsel's investigation. Mueller stated in no uncertain terms, as directly as we would have hoped he could have been on Trump, that they found clear evidence of Russian interference, which led to multiple indictments. That means your vote was manipulated by lies that were amplified by Trump and his campaign. You can lie to yourself and say that Trump didn't "collude" (or, to use the legal term, "conspire") with the Russians, but there is no hedging on the fact that Trump and his goons and lackeys gladly touted the information that was stolen from the Democrats and all the false allegations against Hillary Clinton. Are you good with that? Are you okay with a foreign government using, well, fake news to make you want to vote a certain way? Or perhaps even just hack into voting machines and change your vote?
See, Democrats don't have to go after Trump for conspiring. They can go after his refusal to acknowledge that Russia did what our own investigations say it did. They can go after his refusal to get behind the efforts to protect the vote. They can go after his disturbing faith in Vladimir Putin. In other words, they can go after Trump for dereliction of duty, for violating his oath of office, and for being such an egomaniacal prick that the legitimacy of his election is more important than the legitimacy of our entire democratic system.
Impeachment would tie together so many threads for Americans. And, goddamnit, Mueller should testify before a House committee because we're not a reading people in the USA. Hell, just having Mueller repeat shit like a live podcast of his report would probably do more to turn the tide against Trump than all the printed words they can muster. (And he could answer whether or not he wanted the FBI post that Trump says he wanted.)
And Democrats better do this shit soon because Trump is listening to some nutzoid ratfuckers on this. Not only did he say in his mad rant yesterday that a court wouldn't "allow" impeachment (the Supreme Court has nothing to do with it until the trial in the Senate after impeachment, where the Chief Justice presides), he said to reporters, "Someday, you ought to read a thing called Article 2. Read Article 2, which gives the President powers that you wouldn’t believe. But I don’t even have to rely on Article 2."
Yeah, you can try to stop him now with impeachment or you can wait until he comes up with a pretext to shitcan the Congress while Republicans totally agree they should give him all the power.
See, Democrats can have all the hearings they want. They can have all the subpoena fights the judicial system can handle. A dozen committees and subcommittees can have witnesses and experts testify about the criminality of the Trump administration. But no one is gonna give a single shit about those things except all the assholes who are constantly checking Twitter to see who "destroyed" who in a 3-minute video. (Note: Yeah, I'm one of those assholes, and it has made me seek the comfort of vicodin and vodka, a V&V cocktail that can straight murder you if you're not careful.)
What people can get their heads around is a single, simple concept: impeachment. It crystallizes all that other shit into a concept that is analogous to "fight." As in, "Holy Christ, Democrats are finally gonna stop being such punk-ass bitches and actually fight this dumb orange motherfucker who is wrecking the joint. About fuckin' time."
I fucking guarantee that as soon as an impeachment inquiry is opened, Democrats will be jizzing themselves so hard that they'll do anything to keep that orgasm going. The excitement it would elicit in the left and a good deal of the center would be akin to a surfer hitting the barrel of a wave just right. Jesus, what a feeling. I fucking guarantee that polling on support for impeachment would go up immediately. That's why it's called "leadership." You go first and others follow. And the right would lose its fucking mind, which would be as delicious as eating whipped cream off an angel's nipple.
Look, there is only one rational conclusion to draw from Special Counsel and not-the-hero-we-needed Robert Mueller's weird statement on Wednesday. I say "weird" because it could seem like he was just casting some bones and telling us to read their prophecies. And he delivered it in a nervous, exhausted tone that said he just wanted to go fishing already. But, still, what he was saying was pretty fuckin' clear: Russia interfered in our elections, and, holy fuckballs, why aren't we doing anything about that? And President Donald Trump sure as shit obstructed the investigation.
I mean, seriously, you have to be willingly obfuscating or so slobberingly brainwashed that you eat and shit MAGA to misunderstand Mueller. Or you have to be guilty. "[I]f we had had confidence that the president clearly did not commit a crime," Mueller said, "we would have said so." And then in the very next part, he said why he couldn't therefore say the president did commit a crime: because of the bullshit Department of Justice memorandum. In other words, the president committed a crime, and so did a lot of others. But he can't just say that.
Why didn't Mueller say, "Fuck it. Impeach the motherfucker already"? Because I fucking promise you they would have punished him. They'd have taken away his pension or some such shit because he violated DOJ policy. It would have been a battle. No matter what globular Attorney General and Man Most Likely to Be Trump's Footrest William Barr says now about how Mueller could have indicted Trump, if Mueller had, they would have done everything in their cynical, foul power to wreck him because that's what they do.
The other thing is that Mueller is a Republican, and he likely honestly believed that Republicans would do the right thing because, and it can't be said enough, the motherfucking Russians interfered in our election to harm one specific candidate, Hillary Clinton, and get another specific candidate, Donald Trump, elected. If Mueller has faith in the GOP to act honorably, then that is his tragic flaw.
But let's return for one moment to the findings of the Special Counsel's investigation. Mueller stated in no uncertain terms, as directly as we would have hoped he could have been on Trump, that they found clear evidence of Russian interference, which led to multiple indictments. That means your vote was manipulated by lies that were amplified by Trump and his campaign. You can lie to yourself and say that Trump didn't "collude" (or, to use the legal term, "conspire") with the Russians, but there is no hedging on the fact that Trump and his goons and lackeys gladly touted the information that was stolen from the Democrats and all the false allegations against Hillary Clinton. Are you good with that? Are you okay with a foreign government using, well, fake news to make you want to vote a certain way? Or perhaps even just hack into voting machines and change your vote?
See, Democrats don't have to go after Trump for conspiring. They can go after his refusal to acknowledge that Russia did what our own investigations say it did. They can go after his refusal to get behind the efforts to protect the vote. They can go after his disturbing faith in Vladimir Putin. In other words, they can go after Trump for dereliction of duty, for violating his oath of office, and for being such an egomaniacal prick that the legitimacy of his election is more important than the legitimacy of our entire democratic system.
Impeachment would tie together so many threads for Americans. And, goddamnit, Mueller should testify before a House committee because we're not a reading people in the USA. Hell, just having Mueller repeat shit like a live podcast of his report would probably do more to turn the tide against Trump than all the printed words they can muster. (And he could answer whether or not he wanted the FBI post that Trump says he wanted.)
And Democrats better do this shit soon because Trump is listening to some nutzoid ratfuckers on this. Not only did he say in his mad rant yesterday that a court wouldn't "allow" impeachment (the Supreme Court has nothing to do with it until the trial in the Senate after impeachment, where the Chief Justice presides), he said to reporters, "Someday, you ought to read a thing called Article 2. Read Article 2, which gives the President powers that you wouldn’t believe. But I don’t even have to rely on Article 2."
Yeah, you can try to stop him now with impeachment or you can wait until he comes up with a pretext to shitcan the Congress while Republicans totally agree they should give him all the power.
5/28/2019
The Problem Is That Mitch McConnell Doesn't Give a Fuck About Ethics, Morality, or Law While Democrats Do
You can't understand the Devil until the Devil shows you his works. Oh, you may think you grasp what the Devil is capable of; you think it's all just monstrous acts of sharp object sodomy and the extravagant, cruel lies the Devil uses to justify his devilish fuckery. But what most people don't understand until they see the Devil in action is that it's far, far worse when the Devil abandons lies and gives you the truth. Then you look in the face of an honest Devil and you are utterly lost because you knew what was true. You just didn't think the Devil would grin so broadly when he told it to you.
The reason that Democrats seem so hapless in the face of Republican savagery is that Democrats don't grasp the depth of the moral and ethical void in the center of the GOP. They keep telling themselves that Lucifer was once an angel and he can be one again, ignoring that Lucifer doesn't fuckin' want to go back to boring ol' Heaven. They cling to this pathetic hope like a log in a flood, except they ignore the snake on the log that has no problem biting them to death.
Today, malevolent dry turd Mitch McConnell, who is the goddamn Senate Majority Leader, was at a luncheon at the Chamber of Commerce of Paducah, Kentucky (motto: "Sure, we're filthy with heroin and racism, but we have a quilting museum!"). He was asked, "Should a Supreme Court justice die next year, what will your position be on filling that spot?" See, this is a reference to 2016, when Justice Antonin Scalia died and McConnell declared that the seat shouldn't be filled until after the presidential election so "the people could decide" or whatever fucking excuse he used. Next year will be another presidential election, and I think you know where this is going.
Here's his response: "The leader took a long sip of what appeared to be iced tea before announcing with a smile, 'Oh, we'd fill it,' triggering loud laughter from the audience." Oh, man, that's hilarious. See, he doesn't have any principles. He doesn't give a happy monkey fuck about hypocrisy. All he cares about is winning, fuck everything else. He took joy in saying that shit. It's just so funny.
That a giant hand didn't descend from the sky and squeeze McConnell until he popped like a fat bullfrog under a steamroller is absolute proof that there is no God.
You can't beat Machiavelli by quoting Thich Nhat Hanh. You can't reason with a pack of gabbling hyenas who are tearing up a gazelle by offering them etiquette lessons. Yet that's what Democrats are trying to do with their seeming acquiescence to Republicans when it comes to impeachment. They keep waiting for the political equivalent of Bigfoot to come along: a group of Republicans who will publicly oppose Trump. But that big fucker is never gonna be found.
Look, at this point, Republicans are too far in with Trump. They have more reason to keep him afloat than to put him in cement shoes that they are chained to. With all the shit they've let Trump get away with so far, why bother stopping him now? It's like they all committed a bank robbery; they emptied the safes and shot all the hostages. They're standing there covered in blood, with cash falling out of their pockets. If their leader says, "Ok, let's burn down the bank," well, why get a conscience now? They'll just start setting fire to shit.
McConnell didn't give a fuck about how his reversal on whatever ludicrous principle he pretended to have seemed. He didn't give a fuck about how it seemed when he refused Merrick Garland a hearing and vote. He didn't give a fuck because it's about the win, not how you get it. He didn't give a fuck because the Devil doesn't give a fuck.
And people respond to the win. That's how we got Trump in the first place. More on that and how it applies to impeachment later this week.
The reason that Democrats seem so hapless in the face of Republican savagery is that Democrats don't grasp the depth of the moral and ethical void in the center of the GOP. They keep telling themselves that Lucifer was once an angel and he can be one again, ignoring that Lucifer doesn't fuckin' want to go back to boring ol' Heaven. They cling to this pathetic hope like a log in a flood, except they ignore the snake on the log that has no problem biting them to death.
Today, malevolent dry turd Mitch McConnell, who is the goddamn Senate Majority Leader, was at a luncheon at the Chamber of Commerce of Paducah, Kentucky (motto: "Sure, we're filthy with heroin and racism, but we have a quilting museum!"). He was asked, "Should a Supreme Court justice die next year, what will your position be on filling that spot?" See, this is a reference to 2016, when Justice Antonin Scalia died and McConnell declared that the seat shouldn't be filled until after the presidential election so "the people could decide" or whatever fucking excuse he used. Next year will be another presidential election, and I think you know where this is going.
Here's his response: "The leader took a long sip of what appeared to be iced tea before announcing with a smile, 'Oh, we'd fill it,' triggering loud laughter from the audience." Oh, man, that's hilarious. See, he doesn't have any principles. He doesn't give a happy monkey fuck about hypocrisy. All he cares about is winning, fuck everything else. He took joy in saying that shit. It's just so funny.
That a giant hand didn't descend from the sky and squeeze McConnell until he popped like a fat bullfrog under a steamroller is absolute proof that there is no God.
You can't beat Machiavelli by quoting Thich Nhat Hanh. You can't reason with a pack of gabbling hyenas who are tearing up a gazelle by offering them etiquette lessons. Yet that's what Democrats are trying to do with their seeming acquiescence to Republicans when it comes to impeachment. They keep waiting for the political equivalent of Bigfoot to come along: a group of Republicans who will publicly oppose Trump. But that big fucker is never gonna be found.
Look, at this point, Republicans are too far in with Trump. They have more reason to keep him afloat than to put him in cement shoes that they are chained to. With all the shit they've let Trump get away with so far, why bother stopping him now? It's like they all committed a bank robbery; they emptied the safes and shot all the hostages. They're standing there covered in blood, with cash falling out of their pockets. If their leader says, "Ok, let's burn down the bank," well, why get a conscience now? They'll just start setting fire to shit.
McConnell didn't give a fuck about how his reversal on whatever ludicrous principle he pretended to have seemed. He didn't give a fuck about how it seemed when he refused Merrick Garland a hearing and vote. He didn't give a fuck because it's about the win, not how you get it. He didn't give a fuck because the Devil doesn't give a fuck.
And people respond to the win. That's how we got Trump in the first place. More on that and how it applies to impeachment later this week.
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