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Dating advice
Thousands of happy couples have found each other through Soulmates since we launched in 2004. We've listened to their feedback and advice and gathered the tips to to help get you started:
Online
Creating your profile
People who've had success with Soulmates say that the best approach is to present yourself in the most positive light, without being unrealistic. Try to avoid clichés and generalisations and focus on your individuality. It may sound obvious but try and come across as friendly and approachable.
“Don’t write a profile that you think will appeal to the most number of people, write one that appeals to you, that makes yourself smile. Then marry the one that laughs at your profile!” Jon, success story 2013
You may be tempted to exaggerate or tell a few tall tales but think about how you’d react if the situation were reversed. It’s best to be up front from the start, those few extra inches of height or couple of years off your age will become apparent all too quickly when you meet your date.
Adding photos
It’s a proven way of attracting more interest in your profile. Your profile photograph should be a clear portrait – it will appear as a miniature next to each message you send. Include lots of variety in your gallery pics and choose your photos carefully so they reflect the ‘real you.’
On the Soulmates blog there are more tips from our team on how to choose the perfect profile and gallery pictures to make your profile shine.
Protecting your privacy
Don’t use your real name as your username, and don’t re-use a photo from your workplace or social network page as your profile picture. Take the time to get to know your date before revealing personal information such as your full name or address. To find out more about how to protect your privacy, visit the Soulmates blog.
Be proactive
Get out there, browse profiles, see who catches your eye. Use the ‘Like’ button to indicate interest - you never know, the feeling may be mutual. Don’t be too fussy at this stage… that can come later.
Sending messages
The ‘scattergun’ approach of sending messages reading ‘Hi fancy a drink’ to all and sundry is not a tactic likely to succeed. Once you’ve found a profile you like the look of, read it, then create an email tailored to that person. It’s more flattering that way and more likely to get a response, but if it doesn't try not to get too frustrated; maybe they're too busy or they might not be a good match for you. There's plenty more people out there. For more advice on what you first message should be, see the Soulmates blog.
On your date
Planning the first date
Thinking about your first date can become a bit overwhelming. Try to relax! Dinner and drinks may feel a little like a job interview, so why not visit an exhibition, go to a market, or take a stroll together on your first date? It takes the pressure off, gives you something to talk about, and if sparks don’t fly, at least you’ll have had a fun day out. The blogcan give you more tips for your first date.
First date conversation
Think of five open-ended questions to ask your date; some based on their profile and a couple on current events. If the conversation dries up, use them. Click here for some of our suggestions.
On the day
Try to arrive on time. Make an effort to get to know your date. Unless it’s an emergency - or you’ve faked one because the date is going badly - put your phone away for the evening. It's also important to be prepared to pay your way- don't put yourself in a situation where you feel like you owe your date something or they are indebted to you.
And finally…
Don’t assume that your date is a mind reader. Don’t say "I’ll call you" if you’d rather extract your own teeth than meet again. And if you had a good time, say so! It could be the start of a beautiful romance.
More information
If you're still in need of some tips, the Soulmates blog contains lots more information and advice from the Soulmates team on topics like what to wear on the first date, when you should introduce someone to your friends, and even how much you should drink when you first meet someone.
Good luck and happy dating!