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I helped host a number of gatherings in the late 90s/early aughts. Anywhere from between 20 to 85 people showed up. It was by invitation/word of mouth only for several reasons. 1) We didn't want to be overwhelmed by numbers in terms of food, shelter, size of space, requirements etc. 2) It ensured some degree of likely intimacy and or affinity. 3) It emphasized meeting people that you could see again to do stuff with because most of them probably lived within a shared geographical region. 4) Helped keep cops out.

These gatherings led to events, projects, friendships, activities, actions and relationships many of which continue to last to today, 20 years later.

I think that informal gatherings drawing primarily from local social webs and simply based around sharing ideas, food and skills are 'better' than book fairs or conferences or national forums/symposiums, especially if the idea is to encourage future anarchic activity and lasting relationships where you live.

PS. (At a more recent gathering one of the very first things that happened was a round intended to give everyone the opportunity to state the pronoun they preferred. This was mostly pointless because there were dozens of people in the space and therefore no way to remember who preferred what pronoun. It was just a leftist ritual. It also set a liberal/Idpol tone that emphasized hostile/competing differences/categories.)