TOTP 25/12/77 (tx 24/12/12): no Beatles, Elvis or Rolling Stones in 1977('s Christmas Day TOTP)

Well, that's another year done with. Let's start with the six most read posts of 2012 to date, inevitably affected by events but with a heartening end:

6 TOTP 7/4/77 (tx 19/4/12): boxing clever: two clips from Soul Train do some of the legwork, but the central conceit is Legs & Co's boxing exhibition to Love Hit Me. In the comments Brendon's bassist posts PDFs of two TOTP shooting scripts.

5 TOTP 12/5/77 (tx 24/5/12): bee sharp: bees, steel drums, streamers, wine bottles, orchestras, Billy Paul having to recreate his own samples, Lee Brilleaux... the maddest show of the year, where Jimmy comes on quarter of the way through in a wig and suit professing to be his brother Percy and in context it seems perfectly normal.

4 TOTP 22/9/77 (tx 18/10/12) open thread: the first Pops after the series of unfortunate events, emotional balm provided by working out whether Hank The Knife was wearing a wig, why dry ice was so upsetting Jean-Jacques Burnel and whether Stardust's singer was Paul Whitehouse in disguise.

3 The disappeared: 17/11/77: the first skipped show for which video evidence could be provided, featuring Noosha Fox, Brighouse and Rastrick's finest and Bob Geldof's noogieing. Numbers boosted by being linked to from all over the place, including David Icke's forum.

2 TOTP 25/8/77 (tx 27/9/12): your super soaraway show: Legs & Co take to the catwalk in Elvis' honour, Noel sports a Boomtown Rats badge and the Adverts fall prey to the soundman. A record 131 comments, bolstered by outside influences.

1 Contempt breed familiarity: despite everything this was a comfortable winner, a potted history of the one band the internet knew nothing about before appearing on these shows. Don't know how this ended up so popular, apart from one link on doyouremember it doesn't appear to have been linked from anywhere.

Of course were this a more representative look back at 1977 Contempt would have taken pride of place, alongside Joy Sarney, Danny Mirror, Brendon, David Parton, Trinidad Oil Company, Martyn Ford Orchestra, Honky, the Carvells, Page Three, the Foster Brothers, Hudson-Ford, Neil Innes, Gene Cotton, Dead End Kids, Jigsaw, The Banned, Peter Blake, the RAH Band, Berni Flint, John Miles' command of the talkbox, Danny Williams, the Steve Gibbons Band and the Mah Na Mah Na Legs & Co routine with a live feed from the living room of Sue's children, plus Diddy interviewing Michael Nesmith. Instead the ever unimaginative BBC LE department decided to honour the biggest hits of the year instead. Pschaw.

So before we start here's how it fitted into what some say was the greatest Christmas evening's telly of all time, featuring the two most watched Christmas Day light entertainment shows of all time, and the one that received the most viewers isn't the one everyone thinks it is (and wasn't as big as is commonly quoted):

8.55am Star Over Bethlehem
9.55am Playboard
10.10am Michael Bentine appeals on behalf of Wells Cathedral
10.15am Christmas Worship from All Saints Parish Church, Kingston-Upon-Thames
11.13am Weatherman
11.15am The Bear Who Slept Through Christmas animation
11.40am National Velvet
1.40pm Are You Being Served?
2.10pm Top of the Pops
3.00pm The Queen
3.10pm Billy Smart's Christmas Circus
4.10pm The Wizard Of Oz
5.50pm Basil (Brush) Through The Looking Glass
6.20pm Evening News
6.25pm Songs Of Praise
7.15pm The Generation Game
8.20pm Mike Yarwood Christmas Show
8.55pm Morecambe and Wise Christmas Show
10.00pm News
10.05pm Funny Girl
12.30am Weatherman
12.31am Closedown

The best ITV could do? The Christmas Stars On Sunday and nearly three hours of Young Winston.

Back to business, with an intro screen which features previous footage of those who we'll see over the following fifty minutes in the middle and chart slides of others along the side. This is the closest Barry Biggs, Berni Flint and, remarkably, the Sex Pistols get to the end of year spectacular. 'Part One' - well, it couldn't be comfortably edited out, I suppose - has Noel and Kid in charge, the former in the widest bank manager-style tie he could find, the latter in a purple suit, huge bow tie and ruffled shirt giving him the look of a school leaver on work experience at The Comedians. Noel hopes "the pudding isn't lying too heavy cos there's a bit of dancing to do today, I reckon". Not with most of this lineup there isn't. Maybe that's the idea.

Showaddywaddy – You Got What It Takes
Not a lot of new performances given the auspicious occasion but the 'Waddy are always available with a combination of colours to suit all occasions. They start with their backs turned, as per rock and roll showbiz tradition, but it doesn't work if they're initially being filmed from behind the stage left drumkit. Under a variety of large balloons Dave Bartram, who appears to have a large car key for a medallion, struts in allurring electric pink while nobody else at all mimes the prominent sax part. We know from last year that they like a visual gag, so the performance is cut into with shots of them at a large dining table re-enacting the last supper (or having a false Christmas dinner, one of the two) Buddy liberally pours out wine and makes merry, as you'd expect. Romeo looks unenthusiastic pulling a cracker, as you'd expect. Al James sits at the end on his own and looks utterly fed up.

Deniece Williams – Free
Tip: when being shot in artful half-darkness, don't wear a dark coloured dress. At least they've given her a proper stage this time. Lit by spotlight from the front and one in-shot overhead light, Deniece is definitely made out as the centre of attention which enhances her emotive heights of performance that by the end almost reach Minnie Riperton levels, though the only other people in the studio on that side of camera are a discreetly placed well back orchestra. Still applause at the end, obviously. They've got a pretence to keep up.

Brighouse & Rastrick Brass Band – The Floral Dance
Kid comes up with a corker: "1977 certainly saw a lot of new names in the charts, none more outrageous than this." Really, Kid? In the year of punk, something you'd previously indicated you were well across, and the decade of rock excess a traditional brass band were "none more outrageous"? This is a repeat of their regular year performance but it hasn't been on BBC4 before, though with the audience waving balloons, tiny bits of material on large sticks behind them you might be forgiven for thinking it was a special party mood performance.

Emerson Lake & Palmer – Fanfare For The Common Man
Kid challenges Noel to name an act with three names, and Noel dodges the future editing bullet. "Carol Bayer Sager? Andy Fairweather-Low? Value Added Tax?" He actually did that same rule-of-three line when Bayer Sayer was on, but Christmas schedules are famed for repeats. Legs & Co time, and what better physical illustration of the concept behind the title than Musketeer doublet and hose? Maybe Flick was expecting Mike Oldfield to be picked or something. On the plus side it means plenty of knicker shots, which may be the partial point of the exercise. Lots of hat doffing work ensues around Christmas trees with Pauline both opening and on a central plinth from where she gets a solo that amounts to turning round in a circle

Leo Sayer – When I Need You
Noel seems to have a thing with Bayer Sager, specifying that she wrote this song. A repeat of his performance when it reached number one, where Leo in a bare, dark studio models a large ice hockey shirt, sticks his hands in his pockets and lets the director pick up the slack with multiplication visual effects.

Manhattan Transfer – Chanson D'Amour
Or as Kid still calls them "the Manhattan Transfer Company". He ends his intro to the same film clip as original showing on an odd upward inflection as if he's unsure about the chanson's actual properties after all this time.

Hot Chocolate – So You Win Again
Even though he doesn't deliver the punchline this link has the handiwork of Noel all over it as he asks Kid which bands he's not liked this year. "You mean apart from Hot Chocolate?" Kid replies before being bundled almost to the ground, and of course there they are just across the way. Of course Kid called this OK You Win when he first introduced it, so maybe there's truth in there. As usual Errol sings right to us while moving hesitantly to the rhythm while the rest of the band swap glances and knowing grins.

David Soul – Don’t Give Up On Us
Abba – Knowing Me Knowing You
Space – Magic Fly
Johnny Mathis – When A Child Is Born (Soleado)
Four repeated videos in a row, this portion notable only for a shot halfway through Soul of a large group of audience members who don't appear at any other stage of the programme dancing to Toppotron™ - that may be a straight repeated clip from a previous show, which is confusing given they clearly have a clean copy of the proper video to show - and before Space Noel reading out a purported card dedication: "Christmas comes but once a year and when it comes it's very exciting, but Top Of The Pops is always fun especially when done by crew 19". This is apparently so vital Noel never actually introduces the clip, which with its visual effect assault, men in helmets and synth oddness must have left family members baffled nationwide.

Stevie Wonder – Sir Duke
"Legs & Co have invited a special friend along" smiles Kid and that can only mean one thing - Floyd! Dressed as Santa! Well, if you want someone to willingly move and strut with absolute dedication and excitement while in a silly costume you may as well call for the acknowledged expert. Not that the girls are stinting, dressed as they are as trotting reindeer insomuch as they have antlers on their furry hoods, albeit bedecked in holly leaves plus little tops, microshorts, gloves and boots in matching shiny silver. Santa Floyd, who hardly ever breaks his look at the camera, has the human reindeer on a leash, which brings all manner of unsubtle allusions to the fore. Even that shrinks in the egregiousness stakes, however, compared to the fact someone's added to Stevie's precision funk with sleigh bells. It doesn't improve the mix. Eventually Floyd ostentatiously disappears down a model chimney and his flock wave him off. Patti seems to be blowing him a kiss, which adds yet another layer.

Kenny Rogers – Lucille
Noel stumbles forward mid-link. "I've got a loose heel here..." is his punchline. Christ, even the Barron Knights had done that one already by then, and Kid either feigns despair or is genuinely despairing. It's a video but not the one we've already seen, as Kenny is by an empty bar festooned with bottles and instead of leaping over and going mad chooses to sit without a drink and tell his story. When he sits down there's an audible creak. He doesn't seem to be singing live but no foley artist would be so moved, would they?

Baccara – Yes Sir I Can Boogie
Another act returning to the studio, so the director chooses to start with 25 seconds essentially of just red filtered lights before the proper spotlighting is set upon the duo. Uncomfortable shifting and a couple of rehearsed spare hand movements ensue.

Wings – Mull Of Kintyre
Kid predicts the McCartneys will be "celebrating up in Scotland". What, nothing else? It's not like they'd have a turkey, I suppose. The same performance as we last saw, which isn't from Yarwood as previously stated, instead just seeming to be a second, maybe slightly cheaper video perhaps just to show off Linda's tartan socks. Kid manages to get a lengthy outro link out in one breath before Noel cues in "probably the biggest selling Christmas record of all time", White Christmas. That's no excuse. Sadly Kid doesn't wish us "merry Christmas and merry love", just the first half, but, overlaid over a slowly circling camera shot of the studio ceiling that eventually alights on some tinsel and baubles in kaleidoscope-vision, the credits are in Star Wars scrolling type and font. Influential already.





This is quite a long post, isn't it? Let's make it a little longer but simultaneously easier, as thanks to Neil again here's the Boxing Day show, not complete as UK Gold cut out repeats (we assume) of Brotherhood Of Man, Billy Ocean and Joe Tex, featuring a handful of new performances - Boney M with Bobby Farrell still having to sing his own parts and an unwelcome intrusion to mime the news report bit, Heatwave, an Elvis montage, a rather literal Legs & Co routine for Silver Lady and, erm, Showaddywaddy's hit that was already going down the charts when 1977 started. It also starts with the same title sequence as the previous day so you can see what I meant.

The disappeared: 22/12/77

A forty minute show three days before Christmas, because that's what they did back then. Why not play Fantasy BBC4 Editing? Again provided by Neil Barker, who taped it onto VHS in the Sky analogue days so quality is less than perfect:



How serious Osibisa's singer seems compared to the rest of the band, and indeed Jimmy, who seems to have worn that unique vest on special occasions for about a decade and a half in total. They're one of three studio performers whose song won't appear again, as with Scott Fitzgerald and Yvonne Keeley plus friends and a debuting... well, it was released as 'Lol Creme & Kevin Godley' but Jimmy's taken the less associative elements, plus the songs by Yannis Markopoulos and Donna Summer, to whom Legs & Co pay tribute by inventing Tetris. Sadly Jimmy doesn't stop to explain who the men in matching jumpers behind him before Gordon Giltrap's Holiday theme are, nor why the one second from left is the spit of Stewpot. And at the last link, before the Muppets' version of Don't Dilly Dally On The Way, the bloke to Jim's right - we've seen him before, haven't we? He's not Irresistible Dennis, I know that.

TOTP 15/12/77 (tx 20/12/12): Thursday night's alright for charting

Let's get down to brass tacks, it's your special guest host Elton John! Sporting a cap, because any port in a storm, and a jacket with red lining that's probably far more expensive than it looks, plus in an interesting development no glasses. The other Donna Summer single, I Love You, goes behind the rundown.

The Dooleys – Love Of My Life
Of course we (points at comments box) have seen this twice already but they (points at viewing public) haven't, which means they miss out on the transmogrification and join the Dooleys as their transformation into all-pearly grinning supper club entertainers with ideas above their station is complete. Jim of the flowing mane has an open-zipped Evil Knievel castoff of a top and a pair of white trousers that are hitched so far up his body, with the aid of a thick belt, he surely couldn't walk properly. Anne and Kathy are more properly dressed than first time around, in fact one of them not far from Catholic girls' school chic. The keyboard player, taking Jim on at his own game despite being stood right next to a large circle, has gone for the open jacket over bare chest. The bassist is standing right next to Jim on stage, which is building up your part somewhat given the usual vocal arrangement.

Jonathan Richman & The Modern Lovers – Egyptian Reggae
Elton's body language is all over the place, a ten second link sees him bobbing, weaving, shifting from foot to foot and sticking out his right elbow like he's trying to balance on a ball. Maybe because nobody could believe it first time round, "the fantastic" Legs & Co's meisterwork gets a second airing.

Carl Douglas – Run Back
It's now we can clearly see Elton has some sort of small reflective pendant on, could be diamond, could be glass. Should never leave home without one. As the camera pulls over to Carl we can see about a third of the audience are watching Elton instead. Not unsurprisingly, given his relative stature, but you're there for the music, dammit. And maybe for Douglas' dad clothes, a cream fleece for the larger figure and far too tight light brown cords. He's enthusiastic enough when it comes to improvised fist clenching and taking a step down to the lower part of the stage and when he spots a lurking lens it's little eyebrows and pretend surprise all the way. Then, right on the big brassy first note of the chorus, he delivers an over the top comedy wink. He knows alright. He also knows nobody else knows what melisma is yet as he arches backwards and delivers a big note, and then spoils it with another chorus to which he bounces jauntily about on the spot. There are, we note, two sailors down the front. Wrong week!

Julie Covington – Only Women Bleed
We lose Dooley Wilson's As Time Goes By for film rights reasons and pick up as on tape Covington stands, backlit, and sings to two different cameras from various distances in exactly the same way Bowie does in the Heroes video.

Darts – Daddy Cool/The Girl Can’t Help It
"Time to move yourself about a bit now". Here at the halfway point you begin to understand the problem with this show. It's not that Elton isn't entirely comfortable with performance to camera - ah, how times change - or that he starts every link looking at the floor followed by an "OK!", it's that this is the very famous Elton John and he's doing nothing other than 'that was, this is'. Nerves may be coming into play on that front, but why have a big name present the show - not even the last one before Christmas, by the way - and give him no room for manoevure? Anyway... Darts are back in town, Rita's in her most comfortably fitting leopardskin and Den's wearing a jacket that might be made out of discarded carpet material and what looks like adapted white dungarees underneath, looking for all the world like the lost Dr Who. Clearly the third wheel of the arrangement, Bob Fish tries to make up for it by proffering his fists as big chorus punctuation as if he's offering everyone outside, which may well have been the case. Hegarty then inevitably escapes, and after hurredly untangling his mike cable settles his chin upon one of the big set design rings, which suspiciously seems to be much lower and nearer than usual. It's when he puts his whole bodyweight upon the hanging structure and tries to swing forward on it that Griff Fender, who has up to now been miming along with Hegarty's lines, looks slightly worried. As they face off at the end the pair resemble teacher and problem child. Maybe that was the plan.

Elvis Presley – My Way
Some commotion can still be just about heard in the background as Elton brings in Legs & Co again. I can't work out whether this was thrown in at the last minute, as the unfitting pink dresses and last minute choreography involving lots of turning and arm waving during which a member gets out of sync at least once suggests, or planned so they could get Patti - at least we're led to assume it's her as she's not otherwise involved - into silhouette in wig, turned up jacket collar and guitar strummed in profile despite there being no acoustic guitar on the track.

John Otway & Wild Willy Barrett – Really Free
Finding himself among the audience for the first time all night Elton gets really out of whack, referring to this "making its debut on Top Of The Pops, for the charts anyway". Mind you, knowing what was coming, wouldn't you be stutteringly apprehensive? No amp climbing or place losing from Otway this time but he does do a few laps of the tiny stage with a suitcase amp in the middle, tear open his shirt just as nobody's expecting or requesting it and have to be pushed back towards the mike by Barrett to start the last verse. Four people down the front headbang vigorously. The rest look confused, not least the next band briefly glimpsed on the other stage.

The Emotions – I Don’t Wanna Lose Your Love
What must they have told people back home about their experience on Britain's famous pop show? Elton rates Best Of My Love as one of his favourite songs of the year, which doesn't stop the orchestra's blaring brass crashing in early and his having to shout over them. Whichever Emotion is taking lead almost immediately exerts the audience to clap their hands. Two people, one of the sailors inclusive, do so. Nevertheless she's pushing on with energy, grabbing the mike and completely foregoing her bandmates' routine with a series of shoulder exercises and playing to the front row. Fine work.

Wings – Mull Of Kintyre
Different clip this week, from the Mike Yarwood show, with Paul standing alone in the middle of a pretend forest clearing, namely one very plastic tree, some dry ice and an old painted backdrop. It must be catching, even Elton's calling it "the number one sound", and to add to the general DLT-ism he adopts a Yorkshire accent introducing the Floral Dance outro, stumbling over the name as he goes. Does he say anything to acknowledge this very famous and characterful pop star has been your guest host for the night? Of course not. Was he doing it under heavy duress?

TOTP 8/12/77 (tx 20/12/12): Christmas double issue

Tony Blackburn in his casual golfing top welcomes us, Donna Summer's Love's Unkind takes us down the countdown, and we all get to admire the inch-perfect skill of the designer.



Generation X – Wild Youth
A close-up of a guitar? With Tony around are we in A Bit Of That Sort Of Rock mode? We're certainly in the bleach'n'sneer department for Gen X's second appearance but the first we've seen on telly, though Billy, gloves to match his leather jacket, really has to try and gain the gaps where he can do that lip snarl thing. The guitarist meanwhile has the drooping blonde fringe that the Police would sport for a bit and Birdland would later take up. (Hands up who thought Birdland would get a relevant reference on here?) Tony James on bass manages to break his strap and has to perform some running repairs in the break. By the end Billy's just shouting and James has abandoned the instrument almost completely, lifting it high on the punch-along beat.

Hot Chocolate – Put Your Love In Me
"Here's a group that never made a bad record" Tony avers. It's another triumph of the directorial art, using both fish-eye lens and fading shots of the band members in turn up over a long shot of the stage before Errol gets to do his straight-faced, big-collared thing in closeup. Then on the way towards the end the effects budget gets blown for another week as everything briefly goes into flickering psychedelic colours, violins cascade, Errol hits a falsetto note or two and then things just continue as if nothing untoward had happened.

Chic – Dance Dance Dance (Yowsah Yowsah Yowsah)
Or as Tony calls them, Chick. No Francophile he. Nile Rodgers tells a story of coming to TOTP in 1975, we think with Labelle, and having only known genre divided radio up til then was surprised to find following them on stage at the recording of what he'd been told was this big modern pop show was Mike Reid's telling of The Ugly Duckling. He's not here, it's Legs & Co in their showgirl outfits, shiny boob tubes/small tops and pants each with a trailing set of feather boas like psychedelic Pepe le Pews and a matching armband. Dancing under a set of geometric shapes hung from the ceiling that wobble occasionally just as the girls move under them there's very much a flapper dancing vibe going on, though you can't really get away with much else dressed like that.

Manfred Mann's Earth Band – California
"I was in California a little bit earlier on this year, and to sing all about that here's Manfred Mann's Earth Band". Either the song actually is about Tony's holiday, which seems unlikely if not overdoing it, or it's not the greatest holiday destination tip I've ever heard. The guitarist, looking like a lost member of 10cc, opens by strumming his guitar unconvincingly before his singing colleague, who with beard and woolly hat seems to be a prototype for Badly Drawn Boy, except in a barely forgiveable rainbow jumper that even a Playaway host would pass by, exudes. It sounds like American country rock, as so many tried to back then. It turns out, though, that it's the drummer we should have been watching, as not only is he wearing a massive headband despite being bald but he bursts out laughing at the guitar solo, surely something he'd be used to by now.

Bonnie Tyler – It’s A Heartache
The show seems to have been edited by pinning the 3.5" videotape to a wall and firing a staple gun at it. Bonnie's back, a vision in a country singer white suit. No room for band theatrics this week with a tiny stage, but she sounds like she's getting used to her new voice. Tony makes sure to credit her as being from "beautiful Wales".

The Bee Gees – How Deep Is Your Love
"Number five in our sensational chart", they're under the lights again. This time with audio wobbles!

Graham Parker & The Rumour – New York Shuffle
The smallest man in pub rock returns! Still in shades, as expected, the Rumour run through some rhythm and blues (as opposed to rhythm and rock) enlivened when Parker joins in the guitar solo by mouthing it right at camera with a circular mouth as if he were a particularly rock-conversant goldfish, all while pumping his right arm to indicate some form of excitement. We lose Bing Crosby's White Christmas here presumably for film rights reasons, though it used to be a staple of TOTP2's festive show. Still, we jump straight on to a song that's just as legendary...

The Banned – Little Girl
Yeeeees. In all senses of the drawn-out sucking of air through teeth. The Banned were members of prog rockers Gryphon chancing it for the quick buck - their past members list on Wiki includes such delights as Rick Mansworth, Ben Dover, Tommy Steal and naturally John Thomas - though with their clipped, reedy riffs, Mockney singing drummer, skinny ties and cheap shades they actually seem to have accidentally invented new wave. Halfway through drummer Paul Sordid - that doesn't even work! - in his cream scarf runs to the proper mike and with the beat merrily carrying on regardless he goes through the motions of pointing and glaring through the shades. The audience look appropriately bemused. "I love that one" Tony lies.

Wings – Mull Of Kintyre
Tony slings his arm around a woman who seems less than enthused about the prospect and introduces a clip we're just going to have to get used to. The gift that keeps on giving, Belfast sees us out.

The disappeared: 1/12/77

Again, the combined forces of Neil Barker and UK Gold When It Was Good fill in a blank:



Geldof seems to have had a thing about ripping up literature, as we'll hopefully see in more exalted circumstances in late 1978, and note too some swapsies in the band, though the new keyboard player doesn't seem entirely accurate in his miming. "Amazing", Dave? Really? Can man really admire both the Rats and the Dooleys with equal excitement? As with the last DLT show we missed there's no songs bar Legs & Co's routine, which is entirely based around the first line of the song, we don't see in another show. That said, pride of place surely goes to a performance that's gone down in a sort of history, John Otway and Wild Willy Barrett very much taking their chances with an audience who are the very definition of not being able to turn away. Something inevitable about DLT introducing Mull Of Kintyre with a Scottish accent.

TOTP 24/11/77 (tx 13/12/12): all the fun of the pharoah

If I knew earlier that a TOTP that wasn't shown would be so much more immediately popular than discussing so many that were, this blog might have taken a different course. Regardless, onwards.

Kid, wearing the sort of mid-length jacket-cum-robe that goes best with a long cigarette holder, a chaise longue and a louche disposition, welcomes us to "the hit music scene". Belfast under the charts, which at 29 includes The Tubes (White Punks On Dope - no, curiously TOTP didn't go near it) with a photo featuring loads and loads of people, surely including people who weren't in The Tubes - on the Old Grey Whistle Test set! Caring and sharing, that's the BBC. Meanwhile Wings are lumbered with the single sleeve, which with the fading of the distinction between photo and photo-in-photo looks on screen like the worst Photoshop you've ever seen.

The Carvells – The LA Run
I don't know what image comes to mind when you try to imagine a song from the mid to late 70s called The LA Run, but I doubt it's this. It may well start with a close-up of a bass, metronomic drumming and some Moog squirting, but before long it's headlong into the world of early Beach Boys pastiche we go, leading-on bass vocalist and everything. Except... about skateboarding. In fact the Carvells, nom de rock for prolific backing singer Alan Carvell, have a board and helmet on the amp and keyboard, called 'their' subsequent album Skateboard Rampage and this is one of only two tracks on that album without the word 'skateboard' in the title. Fad cash-in much? Almost all clad in white trousers they're apparently a three guitar band without sounding anything like one, but they won't let us see the guitar solo as we cut to some stock footage of skateboarders doing their underdeveloped thing next to Tower Bridge - which, you may know, isn't in LA - on parapets and in bowls. And ny sheer amazing coincidence someone in the crowd has brought a skateboard with them! Lofting it above their head they resist any temptation to either try out some moves or chuck it at them. The director gets bored with the overlong outro and puts the skater footage back on, after which we see the keyboard player dancing with the board. You know how Dennis Wilson was the only Beach Boy who could surf - was he the only Carvell who could skateboard?

Wings – Mull Of Kintyre
"A long, long way from the skateboard scene" comes Paul near a cottage, then near a beach, then pipers on a beach. Macca gets up just as Linda approaches so he can go on a wander with Denny Laine. He must have had some explaining to do after that. "That must stand a big chance of being this Christmas' number one sound" Kid predicts, accurately by the show's standards in a stopped clock way, while surrounded by the apparent winners of a Brotherhood Of Man Dress-alike contest.

Bonnie Tyler – It's A Heartache
We've seen Bonnie before on here but this is the first appearance since throat nodules gave her the full cement-gargling treatment. "That sad sweetheart from Swansea", as an onomatopoeic Kid is keen to point out, Bonnie's voice actually seems to be rougher even than we've become accustomed to, borderline laryngitis. Footballer-resembling keyboard player in green T-shirt aside her entirely functional backing band are all in different shades of classic mid-70s brown, keeping it low key for now until the John Milesalike guitarist gets his solo and goes for his moment including a foot up on a non-existant monitor. A very odd moment right at the end, as while Kid confidently states her to be "my tip for success in 1978" - she didn't have another top 30 single until 1983 - Bonnie's voice on its own suddenly appears at seemingly louder volume than during the song for two and a half words, literally cutting off mid-syllable. Cut like that it can't have been a live vocal mistake, but surely a pre-record would have played in the whole band. Curious.

Darts – Daddy Cool/The Girl Can't Help It
"Those darlings of the doo-wop" have their first visit, falling Hegarty and all, repeated. Kid vouches for their live reputation, as if we hadn't just had a taste of it.

Leo Sayer – There Isn't Anything
Kid chooses to deliver his link not so much with his arm round a young woman (stop it) as restraining her with his forearm round her throat. Is she gurning and glancing round the studio out of choice or for assistance as the oxygen depletes? A carefree Kid tries her out as straight woman regardless of her situation. "There isn't anything... isn't it?" is his question to her at the end, again trying to work that particular charm of his, to which she can only say "no" and laugh because the question doesn't make sense without the song. Leo's on his own, as he has been before, a service we've only recently seen granted to Queen. To think there was a time when both would be of the same level of prestige. A blacked out studio highlights the brightness of his top and also the fact that he's basically trying to recapture the big ballad emotion of When I Need You only to find his big notes are just shouting before, using the magic of perspective, he wanders into a large picture frame towards a mike stand. He is, of course, on a part of the stage well behind the frame. What the point of that little sojourn was isn't clear but it keeps us guessing a little. Afterwards he's with a different woman, the stud, making a pointed remark about "beautiful Britain". No, Kid. Not now.

Jonathan Richman & The Modern Lovers – Egyptian Reggae
Ah, paydirt. Kid cracks it's "the music a few English football managers are dancing to these days". Presumably that's a Don Revie joke, but he went to the United Arab Emirates. Still, all the same to Kid, isn't it? Anyway, the quixotic Richman instrumental gets the Legs & Co treatment. Treatment is the operative word. No words can do justice.



I described this on Twitter a couple of weeks ago as Legs & Co's equivalent of Pan's People's Get Down, not only in that it's probably the most likely of their routines you'll see on nostalgia clip shows but it's also people doing what on the face of it is a quite stupid looking routine with a great big animal-based elephant in the room with absolute poker faces and total commitment to their craft. In case you were wondering, according to the former it's Sue front end, Lulu at the back, and you have to say that Ms Cartwright's let the side down a little at the end there, assuming her end tableau position half a bar early while Sue's still wobbling her/its head, though she's also half a second late in the climactic head drop. And see the venomous power of that snake! I really have no idea how Pauline didn't run cowering. Or alternately piss herself laughing. "I'm sure Jonathan Richman would like that" Kid says, giggling. Well, he might.

Hot Chocolate – Put Your Love In Me
The graphical wizards have already moved on from their rainbow coloured circles and seem to have constructed an oval out of coloured lights and wires to project close-up shots of instruments into the middle of. A little moving about and the effect is quite psychedelic for the 20p budget's allowance, though the CSO framing could do with some steadiness. Errol's ever emotionless face mostly gets the full screen treatment, of course, but after he's started there's some judicious wipes from the centre so we can be reminded who's boss round here. There is an audience at this taping, but they're only glimpsed once in a long shot in complete silhouette. Eventually they end with a pan to the lights, like they want to finish already.

The Bee Gees – How Deep Is Your Love
The intro to the video, the one with all the spotlights you're probably aware of, sees Kid take to the Egyptian set and hoists a hitherto unused novelty tiger head print stole over his shoulder. With it in place he tries an Eric Morecambe routine and gets it wrong. Honestly, we shouldn't expect that sort of prop-based fallacy from anyone. Apart from DLT.

Santa Esmeralda & Leroy Gomez – Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood
Odd demarcation, given "high stepping", as Kid refers to him, Leroy Gomez was the singer in the group Santa Esmeralda. It's Gloria Estefan And Miami Sound Machine before its time. Perhaps in protest Santa Esmeralda haven't shown up, which means fewer people to take issue when Kid in voiceover tells us they're "from the land of flamenco guitars, the group Baccara and Manuel". Just say Spain, Kid, we've heard of it. Leroy's up for it regardless, doing some frantic clapping as an intro before a full stage shot reveals it to be him plus three dancing girls - I don't think they're Legs & Co members, though I stand to be corrected, from other European TV performance clips it seems to be more like Leroy's personal harem - performing a routine big in standing side-on in pleated Spanish-type skirts, just to ram it home. Two of them are in their bras. The other probably counted as the demure offering. Gomez, in his afro, half-shaved goatee beard and half-open shirt with sleeves that resemble the shape of tin foil immediately after it's been removed to reveal the buffet sandwiches underneath, tries his best but it can't be helped that he's been placed out to one side of the stage so the dancers get most of the central space.

ABBA – The Name Of The Game
Still there, still at deadlock in their Ludo game. "The Kid", as by now he's calling himself, is back on that new "exotic "set seemingly surrounded by the entire audience, some of whom are in ties, some in rollnecks. Ahead of the Jacksons' Goin' Places he has only one thing left to wish us - "good week and good love!" What? Don't mess with a winning formula!

The disappeared: 17/11/77

By sheerest coincidence, because the cycle hasn't changed, all the lost/skipped shows this year (so far) have coincided with Thursdays off. Unlike the last two this one was on UK Gold many moons ago though, so (cheers, Neil) we have this, enter at your own risk etc...



Brighouse and Rastrick represent! Imagine if you were watching at the time and previously had no idea what that was. The only songs we won't see anyway are the Boomtown Rats - luckily given that ever-popular 'present climate', one might argue - and Noosha Fox. Note also a different edit of Live In Trouble, this time in "loose heel"/"chip shop in Walthamshow" mode. For the record Fox had gone their seperate ways at the start of 1977, a couple turning up in 1978 as the prime of Yellow Dog, one joining Whitesnake and Noosha inevitably going solo with a song written and produced by Fox majordomo Kenny Young - and before you say it Andrew Sachs' targeted granddaughter is Georgina Baillie, this is Georgina Bailey, wide difference - which seems to be a pastoral companion piece to big recentish hit The Killing Of Georgie (without the murder, admittedly) and a band who seem in a cartoonish way to have taken the French element of the lyric to heart. Noosha meanwhile has gone that oh so common fashionista route, the country headmistress. It made number 31 but that wasn't good enough for the label to persevere and Noosha never got to do an impromptu knee raise again. By the way, I wonder wonder what Legs & Co's theme is supposed to be. Stone Age, you'd guess from song selection and general setting, but if so that's really not much effort on the costumes. Or set. Or set stability.

You'll also notice Jimmy didn't say Showaddywaddy much differently from anybody else. YOU HAVE LIED TO US, HUGH DENNIS.


**THERE NOW FOLLOWS INFORMATION ABOUT CHRISTMAS AND NEW YEAR SCHEDULING. IF YOU WANT TO KEEP EVERYTHING A SURPRISE UNTIL THE RELEASE OF THE CHRISTMAS RADIO TIMES (OTHER LISTINGS MAGAZINES ARE AVAILABLE) THIS WEEKEND PLEASE STOP READING**

While we're all gathered here, let's get in order the run of things from here until Epiphany. As expected the one remaining DLT-fronted show is being skipped so there's three normal TOTPs left in 1977 - one next week, two in a row from 8pm the week after. Boxing Day, being DLT-heavy, has also gone for a burton so just the one Christmas show is being repeated, 7pm on Christmas Eve, followed by a ten minute filler up to the hour only listed at present as 'Top Of The Pops: A Christmas Cracker'. Your guess is as good as mine. The programme gets a Christmas Day repeat at 10.15pm.

In further BBC archive ransacking there's ...Sings James Bond (BBC4, 14th, 10.30pm), The Christmas No.1 Story (BBC2, 19th, 9pm), Slade At The BBC (BBC4, 21st, 9.50pm), ...Sings Disney (BBC4, 31st, 8pm) and the annual even though you'd imagine they'd have run out by now TOTP2 (BBC2, 22nd, 8pm). They haven't shown Dennis Waterman and George Cole's run through What Are We Gonna Get For Er Indoors? yet. Just dropping that in there. Normal TOTP 2pm Christmas Day as per and a New Year's Eve companion programme complete the set.

And then... Friday 4th January, 9pm, The Story Of 1978! Followed at 9.50pm (don't ask me) by Big Hits 1978! Followed by... oh. I do know that the official line from the channel as recently as Monday just gone was no decision on scheduling 1978 had yet been made but you'd have to imagine they haven't commissioned, made and scheduled these for the hell of it.

TOTP 10/11/77 (tx 29/11/12): bursting at the seams

Noel's in a suit so he's in a serious mood. No, wait, that can't be right. The Jacksons' Goin' Places under the charts. Somewhat unfairly the photographer wouldn't wait to let Rita Ray get changed.



Obviously Den always dressed like that.

Tom Robinson Band – 2-4-6-8 Motorway
Not often we've started with a repeat visitor. Maybe Robin was impressed by the numbers punching the air, who respond in kind again along with a good proportion of clapping along at the start - though there don't appear to be a lot of people around this week - as the crane camera, given plenty of runway space, takes off, heads through a big cardboard ring and films Robinson, pink triangle badge again proudly worn alongside scruffy skinny school tie, from above. He seems quietly amused by the directorial concept. As you suspected they would eventually the first chorus sees a cut to a different band member with every number. The band seem to be playing totally live in accordance with the Musician's Union sticker on Tom's bass, going on Noel having to wait a moment or two too long waiting for them to pipe down.

Ruby Winters – I Will
First proper link and, dangerously, Noel's trying out a concept joke. "Here's a lady who used to be in the Four Seasons alongside Donna Summer". Takes a moment. Ruby's in a white room with a white piano, a white big chair, a white dress and, for stylistic variation, a red rose in her hand and a big pot of them next to the piano. "I remember when Bud Flanagan and Julie Andrews used to sing that" coos Noel. "I bet you do" retort a nation.

Roxy Music – Virginia Plain



No, hang on, that's not it. Reissued to promote a Greatest Hits, because reissuing songs that were hits five years earlier was pretty common then - we've only just seen Radar Love, remember - although Noel oddly doesn't mention it this is the iconic 1972 appearance of much costumage and glitter. You know the one.



No, hang on, that's not it either, and YES I CAN SEE HE IS. As well as all that there's lots of unselfconscious dancing from the audience so you can tell it isn't 1972. It gets cut off early, unfortunately. Well, look how many songs they're trying to pack into half an hour. If you count rundown and playout, thirteen!

Boney M – Belfast
And who could possibly pass up the opportunity of seeing this experience - "song" seems too reductive - again? Uniting Catholics and Protestants in common scorn.

Elvis Costello – Watching The Detectives
Or as Noel introduces him "the Red Shoes man", odd given Red Shoes wasn't a chart hit. As with Red Shoes Elvis is in full angry nerd mode, seeking out the camera as early as sees fit so he can stare it down, eventually leering right over the mike with full-on scary googly eyes for most of the second verse as if we committed whatever it is ourselves. Meanwhile Pete Thomas drums extravagantly mid-stage. "Watching all the detectives and things" is how Noel succinctly puts it.

The Bee Gees – How Deep Is Your Love
And then, Legs & Co ahead, Noel just goes for it. "This is where you have to get your rulers out and tape measures and your plumb lines and, ah, get measuring. Feel a bit silly now." What's he going on about? Presumably he's freestyling on the theme of depth, but - and maybe we've all seen too many DLT intros to bring this thought on - the mention of rulers was in an Adrian Mole sense. If it seems it couldn't get more obtuse Legs & Co oblige in what seems to be farmer's market chic - flat caps, waistcoats, check shirts, slacks, sensible shoes. It says here Flick chose the clothes herself to fit the mood, which makes you wonder what interpretation she saw in the song. Gill, Lulu and Rosie do a good line of thumbs jauntily placed into belt loops, I'll say that for the Pauline Sueless routine which involves a lot of conjoined fancy striding and even more pleasant grinning.

Kenny Everett & Mike Vickers – Captain Kremmen (Retribution)
This is the show we would have got had BBC4 not found the rushes for the 1973 show back at the start of October, for this reason. Strange this gets such attention, Kenny was on Capital at the time and didn't start the Video Show until 1978 so it would have meant little to the vast majority of the audience. Noel doesn't even try to place it in proper context, instead working around the theme of Star Trek and - hey! - Patrick Moore. Sadly it's only the video, for which Ken presses some buttons, holds a phone to his ear and hangs on visible wires in a spacesuit. Vickers for his part appears dressed as a WWII flying ace prodding an organ in big gloves. How odd this whole venture seems.

Santana – She’s Not There
"There's an interesting story about this record - you listen to it and I'll tell these two ladies the story" Noel ventures before turning and animatedly miming something to two ladies wearing Tom Robinson Band stickers. It's probably more interesting than the grainy enormodome live clip.

Tina Charles – Love Bug/Sweets For My Sweet
The orchestra sound like they're being chased by bees, which is a good start. Tina's an old hand at this now, when not stuck in the gantry, but with her either recent or ongoing pregnancy she's been forced into a billowing marquee of a black dress. No matter how much of her particular standing on the spot and swaying a bit charm she plays up she can neither hide the nature of the song, which counts as a medley only insomuch as two lines of the latter are inserted towards the end, or the move she really goes for in the later stages of swinging her arms around as if trying to take off like a helicopter. A large number of people at the front of the stage, so in the worst possible position to get quickly to the other stage and see the next act, are wearing the T-shirt of...

Darts – Daddy Cool/The Girl Can’t Help It
Behold, the three fashion styles of doo-wop.



Yes, of course Den's jacket is fully shiny. The editing team are really getting their worth out of their new equipment, this week forming a rainbow-hued small arrowhead which Noel follows around the screen. "Double top! Double top!" he obliges at the last. They're back in the studio with some changes, one being the pianist is actually on the stage this time, another that Den, who otherwise is his usual reserved self, has no room to extemporise for his solo spot, ending up rolling on the floor before towering over the front row. Two girls right at the front by his feet obligingly look, bored, in the opposite direction. One of them, it turns out, is wearing their T-shirt! There's gratitude.

ABBA – The Name Of The Game
Merchandise! Maybe.



"You should have a look what's written on the front" he teases, to which his new friend unknowingly obliges.



Well, that's confusing. "Aw, you let the secret out" Noel laughs for some reason, as if it were advertising or some sort of outrage he were trying to hide, then back to the world's least convincing staring competition. Noel lists all the places we can find him, thinks of a few more ("it's my turn to turn the globe round between programmes..."), and Rod Stewart sees us out.

TOTP 3/11/77 (tx 22/11/12): Peter's out

Well, if nothing else it's already lasted much longer than the last time the BBC tried a Doctor Who repeat run. For the second week running we have to start with bad tidings, this time not legally but broadcasterly. At the weekend a researcher for the programme let on via Twitter that the 1978 documentary and thus repeat run was going ahead, yet just yesterday at a press launch BBC4 controller Richard Klein said he hadn't decided whether it would continue.

Now, public indecision is not a blanket rejection per se and the quotes do smack a little of someone who wasn't expecting to be asked - and let's be fair, scheduling a repeat run is less about budgets, studios and suchlike then it is ordering some tapes from the BBC Worldwide library - but clearly that's not what we want to hear. Klein also mentioned declining viewer figures, which is kind of borne out and in such not due to recent events. Discounting the Kenny Everett night TOTP has been in BBC4's weekly ratings top ten once between mid-April and the last published figures, compared to thirteen times in the same span in 2011, and has topped 400,000 viewers three times in 2012 (the last that mid-April show, the one recovered from Diddy's collection as it goes) as opposed to eight last year. 1977 hasn't really had any different scheduling or any less wide advertising than 1976 had, and this for I think I'm right in saying the only all year round regular programming the station has. I know some argue people will flock back for 1978 because of the music but that's rot - 1977, for its associations with punk and disco, is regarded as one of pop music's banner years, whereas 1978 is Grease and Boney M in similar strata of popular culture. We shall have to wait and see, and then perhaps think of something else to do here next year.

Mind you, never mind BBC4's treatment of the show in 2013, it's BBC4's treatment in late 2012 that's looking precarious. With The Sky At Night confirmed for the 7th and just the one show for the week after, the as yet unpublished schedules for the week before and the two weeks around the festive season mean three* normal TOTPs will have to be fitted in between 16th December and whenever the Christmas shows are scheduled for, which last year was the 20th and 22nd. It's as if someone lost count. Or doesn't care that much, obviously.

(* One of which is hosted by Dave Lee Travis, but I haven't heard anything about whether all his programmes have been pulled for the time being or if last week was a one-off, but his job on Magic AM has been dropped until enquiries are completed)

Still, I'm pretty sure we're here for the rest of 2012 at least, so we must press on, sword of Damocles overhead as it may be.

So what do you think of when you hear of Peter Powell? Shape Up And Dance? Anthea Turner? Five 45s At 5.45? Being director of the management company that act as agents to several ITV prime-time's worth of talent? The Record Race? This? (Not the kites, that was another Peter Powell) Whatever, he'd almost literally just joined Radio 1 (bar three months in 1972) and was reputedly so excited at the prospect of hosting the show of shows he lost his voice minutes before recording. The excitement, it's fair to say, shows, even though all he has to say is hello and welcome. Positively bursting at the seams, he is, and that's not the half of it. And he's wearing a Radio 1 T-shirt tucked snugly into his jeans. The exciting new youthful face of radio, there. ELO's Turn To Stone over the charts.

The Jam – The Modern World
Rickenbacker on high alert, and one going on close-ups with an unreadable address on an affixed label and 'I AM NOBODY' written in Tipp-Ex or similar on its body. This is the sort of performance that could, and for all the show lets on might have been, recorded last time the trio were in, so used are we already to the suits and the stances, though Rick Buckler does chance a grin at the camera looking up at him. Bar the full upper body movement of a chap in a flat cap and the similar motions of a friend who joins him halfway through, perhaps that being the designated punk appreciation side of the stage, it's not convincing too many down the front to move wholeheartedly no matter how much Weller gurns in anguish at society and stuff. Those two, and this man...



He jumps in the air.

HE JUMPS IN THE AIR.

And whoops. "Woo! Hey! Wild stuff from the Jam" indeed.

The Carpenters – Calling Occupants Of Interplanetary Craft
And just to top off this opening link of opening links: "let's just think about those occupants of interplanetary craft, shall we?" Richard and Karen on video in front of shots of the milky way.

The Barron Knights – Live In Trouble
The Barron Knights! THE BARRON KNIGHTS! The group the Grumbleweeds could have been! Stop the rerun now, BBC4, the apex has been reached. "A bigger bunch of loonies you're never likely to meet" is Peter's somewhat overheated introduction, so much so he then goes and gets the title wrong. Live It Up indeed. What were they, Mental As Anything? This is the song with the celebrated reworking of Angelo, chip shop in Walthamstow and all that, in the middle, so obviously that's the bit of the song the producer made them cut for time reasons. Red satin jackets and ruffled shirts are the order of the day and if they look direct from their cabaret act that's because they probably were. Just before he starts singing... the singer does a leap in the air and air guitar. One of the Barron Knights taking the piss out of Paul Weller. Oh, those were the days of levelled impetuousness. The kids of 1977 are either stony faced or seem to enjoy the You Make Me Feel Like Dancing section, especially when... the singer unveils his comedy pinging braces. That just leaves the Float On section, which it's fair to say has not wethered the changes in moral attitudes well, rare as it is to see a man corpse at the weight of his own comedy Irish accent. Towards the end one of them does a spin on the spot. "Can you spin like that?" Powell enquires of a lady in a very thick pink cashmere sweater. She obliges. Powell does likewise, in the counter direction. I, watching this in the future, have no idea what future anyone saw in this. So wrapped up is Powell in this idea introducing the next song is an afterthought.

Queen – We Are The Champions
The live video clip wherein to a crowd of scarf wavers Freddie dons the black and white catsuit of fate. "Best thing since Bohemian Rhapsody" Powell avers afterwards. What, out of absolutely everything?

Dorothy Moore – I Believe You
"And now, a little bit of beauty" says Powell in voiceover in the tone of a Radio 3 announcer, a very grandiloquent way of introducing Legs & Co. Entering through some McDonalds hoops, Flick clearly had some spare bathroom curtain material she wanted to get rid of and got it fashioned into six green and yellow dresses, matched to leggins. It's a neatly worked out routine, the girls positioning themselves between the hoops and dancing around and between them, but given I think we've even seen those props before it looks like they made it for 80p.

Status Quo – Rockin' All Over The World
I cannot make out what Powell says before introducing this performance video - "well, wolvey guy?" is my best go - maybe because he can't wait to get the title out before chatting a bystander up. "Hello blue eyes." "Hi!" "Hi hi! Let's get down to this one. Yeah!" Afterwards he delivers a succinct summary: "Status Quo, you know?"

David Bowie – Heroes
My, is he keen to be here. Powell, not (openly) Bowie. "We're rocking on the very best show on television. This is the biggest party in the whole lar." Well, that's what it sounds like. It's not 'world', it's not 'lot', it's not 'bar', again it's not anything distinct. Peter, you're a radio DJ with years of experience. You're supposed to be a clear, enunciating vocal presence. No wonder Sweater Girl back by his side keeps looking at him with some trepidation. As for Bowie, a repeat the original of which we didn't see, the guitarist is clearly no Robert Fripp in style or effects and the drummer is on begrudging session time (though apparently Tony Visconti popped in to play bass) but Bowie is his charismatic self singing live and committed in a shirt with big floppy cuffs. And yes, he's actually there in his pomp and glory, with a crowd, recorded on a proper studio recording night. Now what's your excuse, Mercury? Although having said that Bowie didn't return to Pops until 1995.

Showaddywaddy – Dancin' Party
And to prove the yin and yang of TOTP is in full effect, keeping us all on our critical toes and all that... this is a repeat to everyone but us as well. A cover that still sounds like a ripoff of Runaround Sue, it starts with everyone bar the drummer huddled over Dave Bartram as he launches a call and response, the latter filmed from the crane camera overhead. So was that all in one take or is some of their famed visual perception trickery in evidence again? All in red suits and black shirts Bartram then takes an immediate step into the crowd as two groups of two behind launch into involved routines, including an awkward chorus line. Before we can consider the likely casualty rate from a TOTP camera and its man following Bartram around an audience given their usual GTA-style success with the trolley our man has spotted two people in massive tinfoil top hats like Isembard Kingdom Brunel misunderstanding Noddy Holder and has purloined one for himself. Stolen off the head, in fact, before delving deeper to find its mate, a couple of others following and finding women to dance with as they go, and whomsoever possesses the twin hat shall be joined forever in matrimony, possibly. The hat has written on one side 'HELLO MUM', this being the 70s when that was nearly original, and on the other 'VOTE FONZIE'. Viral Happy Days advertising/vote rigging? On the BBC? Questions must be asked. Powell challenges those given around him to name one each of their other hits. Interactive in this brand new era too.

ABBA – The Name Of The Game
Back to their glares, their anguished soft singing, their dinner table and their Fla. Powell wishes the best "from all of us here to all of you back home" and because the show can't go a week without them, Smokie play out over a weird graphical effect of wavy coloured concentric circles which is never going to overtake the kaleidoscope of studio lights in the nation's affections, I'll tell them that right now. Were this 1977 you'd be about to see the first Citizen Smith. Were this 1977 and you Peter Powell you'd probably be going for quite the lie down with a cool flannel in a darkened room.

TOTP 27/10/77 (tx 15/11/12): a change to our published schedules

Right.

Well, this isn't the way I expected the impending backlog to be dealt with, at the very least of our present worries. Remember when this was a fun, carefree blog? That was a great eighteen months or so we had going back then, wasn't it?

I don't know if 20/10/77 will be shown again, because it might, you never know - the official word is merely 'postponed', though given he's been bailed til January it now seems unlikely. But in case, here's a Disappeared for that show, which I can skip through because Legs & Co aside every one of these will (technically, pending) be on again or has been on before. If it is eventually shown in some form, pretend you never saw this.

Showaddywaddy – Dancin' Party
Smokie – Needles And Pins
Dorothy Moore – I Believe You
Status Quo – Rockin' All Over The World (video)
The Carpenters – Calling Occupants Of Interplanetary Craft (Legs & Co)
David Bowie – Heroes
La Belle Epoque – Black Is Black (video)
Queen – We Are The Champions (video)
Tina Charles – Love Bug/Sweets For My Sweet
Roxy Music – Virginia Plain (no, really, it was reissued for some reason so they repeated the famous 1972 appearance)
David Soul – Silver Lady (video)


Meanwhile...

Kid! Ah, always trust Kid, even in a complex patterned dad tank top. Santana backs the chart and appears concentrating on a closed eyed solo, which about sums him up.

Slade – My Baby Left Me/That's All Right
We catch Slade on the precipice, endless US touring having cost them their way over here and this their last top 40 single for more than three years. Even with this there's some desperation given it's an Elvis tribute, two of his songs welded together into hard rock shape. To complete the Samsonite illusion, Dave Hill's gone and shaved his head. Even Noddy's luxurious mullet passes by the notice of most, although with the shine eminating from the Hill pate it might just be that people standing at a certain angle can't clearly see it.

Mary Mason – Angel Of The Morning/Any Way That You Want Me
In front of a hoop of lights, which really should have had a dog jump through when the song completely changes volume and introduces big timpani for full effect, Mason is making her own attempt at tonsorial attention, a very tightly wound perm that seems to move independently of its owner and makes her look like a lost member of the Abigail's Party cast. Otherwise it's the sort of performance those with stage experience knock out, Mason gazing lustfully down the camera and pacing away during an instrumental section before a sudden half-turn back when time to sing. Sawing strings, Ladybirds in full voice, the full cabaret arrangement.

Darts – Daddy Cool/The Girl Can’t Help It
Three medleys in a row! Even when the charts went mad for medleys in 1981-82 I doubt TOTP ever did that. "You may not believe your eyes when you see this next group but they're for real" is all Kid can say in advance accompanied by an extravagant wave of the arm, though having been weaned on Showaddywaddy and the like some people singing call and response in a line is highly believable. The pianist - sorry, operator of the "piano machine" - is on the floor next to the audience, which is odd as there seems to be room enough on the stage until Den Hegarty gets going, jumping around on the drum riser before taking over vocals with the sort of malevolent glint which is only leading one way. That way is on top of the pianist, and then falling over trying to retake the stage leading to his having to sing the last line while sitting down. As old rock and roll lags given their moment they're putting as much as you like into it. That said, half the audience can't wait to walk away from the stage, and perhaps not before time. "Wild sounds and scenes" adjudges Kid.

Ram Jam – Black Betty
Even Legs & Co are firing tonight, and while rock has never been a Flick strong point, leading to far too much aimless running about, it allows all sorts of signifiers - ripped black dresses, extravagant hair swishing and air punching, meaningful faces to camera. Of course, not everyone makes good business out of looking hard...



Rod Stewart – You’re In My Heart
"Hit sound number four... hit sound number three, actually". Kid must have been put out by being surrounded by women, knowing what people on Twitter would say 35 years into the future. It's a strange video as Rod and his spiky ladies' mullet sits and mopes in an expensive restaurant before singing into a fancy mirror as the maitre d' improvises a violin solo

Boney M – Belfast
Kid's on the stage looking back over the audience at us, which is strange but not quite as strange as what follows. After January's near death by non-miming they're taking no chances on their first visit since, three extra backing singers in carnival gear resembling bellydancing costumes and massive headgear made from what seems to be leftover material which reaches down to the floor at the back, while Liz Mitchell has donned antenna on top of a full bodysuit. As they've brought the band Bobby in his silver reflective suit isn't even the most expressive man on stage, guitar and bass heads and the heads of their players alike bobbing and waving all over the place. This is, lest we forget, for a song about the Troubles. Most of the audience look baffled, as well they might.

Tom Robinson Band – 2-4-6-8 Motorway
I'm going to embed this because of a) Tom's school tie knot, pink triangle badge and Musician's Union sticker, b) the all over the place air punching on the first chorus and c) the tone of the end of Kid's intro. Excited much?



ABBA – The Name Of The Game
Kid's still too excited for proper words, calling this the "highest chart charter". The video, wherein the couples sit around a dinner table, chat, play ludo and experience differing emotions.

Smokey Robinson – Theme From The Big Time
"It's a bit like the pop family Robinson" Kid inaccurately reckons. Truly, if Smokie weren't available the show had to make do with whatever was closest. Wisely for the full soul-funk sound Smokey's brought his own band with him, the pianist caught in passing close-up playing just above the keys without actually depressing them, as well as an all-aquamarine outfit for his Esther Rantzen tribute. (It's not, it was the title track for a Motown-produced film) Only tentative movement now.

Baccara – Yes Sir I Can Boogie
"Can you? I'd like to watch" Kid asks a female placed next to him. Please, Kid, not now. Not here and now. A repeat of their appearance follows, after which he has a guest. "If you were watching last week" ... er, yeah, Kid, about that... "you'll have seen the back of Radio 1's newest recruit - well, this week we're giving you a full frontal" before revealing... Peter Powell" In a Radio 1 247 T-shirt too, as tradition insists. Kid promises we'll see more of him next week before, surprisingly, the Sex Pistols' current top ten single Holidays In The Sun plays us out. Peter Powell as the way forward for Top Of The Pops in 1977? A cheap holiday in other people's misery indeed.

The disappeared: 13/10/77

Rokotto – Boogie On Up
First of three (not counting the dance) we won't see again are Dundee's own contribution to funk - sounds like some comedy concept, but remember Average White Band - grooving up a storm yet a couple of weeks after Rose Royce had taken the opening spot seeming a little undercooked. Does it look to you like there's a couple of ringers here? Also note TOTP2's usual rigorous caption research.



Rod Stewart – You’re In My Heart
The video, obviously, to the first single from Foot Loose & Fancy Free, which we'll see in a couple of weeks.

Brotherhood Of Man – Highwayman
There can't be many bands who sandwiched a complete, top 50-missing flop between number ones, but even at their greatest moment of consistency BoM managed it. This isn't the performance - it's from Top Pops, in fact - but I can't imagine what was shown was too different. The uploader indignantly comments underneath that they can't be an Abba ripoff because they'd been together since 1973. The sound, the look, even the stances must be sheer coincidence, then.



Rose Royce – Do Your Dance
Repeat of their bravura turn from a couple of weeks before.

Mary Mason – Angel Of The Morning/Any Way That You Want Me
To be reshown in a couple of weeks when the first three songs on the show are all technically medleys.

Nazareth – Love Hurts
Pained rock balladeering as seen the other week.

George Benson – The Greatest Love Of All
As always archived by One For The Dads, featuring no Pauline again and rather too much arm waving in big sheets to count as proper dancing as such. Well, how much better would you have done with the source materials?

Ram Jam – Black Betty
Really, what was that bloke's business being there?

John Forde – Stardance
This has already attracted some debate in the comments about where Forde came from and whether Judge Dread was involved somehow. It's another example of something I referred to last week about the rise of space disco, sounding a good few years ahead of its time in places - maybe it got on because someone thought there was a British Space in the offing? - and it's turned up since in the playlists of the likes of 2manyDJs. No sign of the TOTP performance unfortunately, or even a single edit, though there is the extended 12" version.

David Soul – Silver Lady
David stays atop, his dream machine stays running.

TOTP 6/10/77 (tx 1/11/12): the king is dead

We've covered elements of this week already, as the Radio Times for this week featured this cover and a chat with some prime DJs. Noel wasn't amongst them, odd given he was the breakfast show host at the time. Maybe they thought as he was doing Swap Shop he'd be beneath them. In any case here he is with the show "you can have in any colour as long as it's black". So cue Henry Ford. Not really, La Belle Epoque. They like the music, they like the disco sound.

Ooh, look who's charted! Hope they're on soon!



Meco of previous post discussion fame gets the original drawn poster for Star Wars, dully.

Smokie – Needles And Pins
Feels like they're on every other week with something new, so obviously they'd be down to covers eventually. And roughly seventy seconds in audience member of the week is decided:



Imagine being on the bus to the studio wearing that. Even if it's made out of crepe paper it must still weigh a bit. Not that we're looking for distractions from this fairly straight and anaemic cover of the Searchers hit but VT have bought some new edit equipment in the week that creates rainbow-edged radial and diagonal wipes, the former used in conjunction with fish-eye and that through the bottom of a bottle effect we saw last time Smokie were on, probably not coincidentally. Alan Barton is the only member not on a riser. Certain issues?

The Emotions – Best Of My Love
A return to stealing from Soul Train's bins with all the actually dancing audience members that implies and in doing so shows up our lot somewhat. It's hard to decide who's best - a couple off stage left are doing a very kind of straight-legged foot-in-foot-out routine with both extending their arms out straight while somehow still touching fingers. A gent in a powder blue suit right at the front is bending from the waist. A man stage right is spinning every fourth step. The band meanwhile only take the mikes out of their stands just as they finish. Should have thought about that one.

Danny Mirror – I Remember Elvis Presley
Of course you do, he only died seven weeks ago and you've already been in the top 30 for three. Crooning Dutch grief hawker Danny, like so many, looks a bit like Keith Lemon by way of Mike Flowers, and is wearing a jacket with massive fringed bits and an immense number of shiny buttons on the shoulders with an Elvis T-shirt underneath. The audience are stunned into silence. Noel isn't stunned into silence by the demands of his job but from the way he glances over to the stage he looks about ready to say something.

Giorgio – From Here To Eternity
Noel suggests we get the Christmas decorations out, though what the one down Legs & Co are holding is clearly some sort of mass of shiny streamers. The reason I can't be any more accurate is the whole routine is in silhouette with a projected extreme close-up backdrop, which isn't really reflecting the futuristic nature of the record, electro years ahead of its time, and also fools those who look out for their favourite every week. One of them's Gill. Probably. They do look like they're giving it plenty in terms of energy and exuberance, it's just we can't tell for sure.

Yes – Wondrous Stories
Punk killed prog off in 1977, you know. A live performance video, Jon Anderson clad in an oversized dishcloth, most of the others in adapted Edwardian gear.

Deniece Williams – Baby, Baby My Love's All For You
A lovely lady, according to Noel. No staircase this time so she gets to move about, which for her means sticking one arm in the air and turning round. As the orchestra prove yet again they can ride a coach and horses right through disco if they so choose, sadly Hat Lady looks bored in a sea of interest, turning away from the stage when we catch her. Her friend is wearing a blue beret and what looks like the same top as Jon Anderson, oddly.

The Stranglers – No More Heroes
There's not even that much dry ice down JJ's side of the stage.

Baccara – Yes Sir I Can Boogie
Noel polls two interested ladies on how to pronounce what seems a fairly straightforward name, revealing some thought it was "Bacc-arer". "I thought it was the Osmonds meself!" chortles Noel to no reciprocation. They already did this once on the show and told you in the first verse too.

Steve Gibbons Band – Tupelo Mississippi Flash
Say this for Noel, he gets the audience involved, first chiding them on making noise around him and then sharing reading out the title duties with two women. It's another song about Elvis, one Gibbons, who somehow looks even more craggy than before, begins with some spoken word before falling into rock and roll line. The bassist is wearing a gas station cap and overalls, supposedly signifying trad working man identification. It probably isn't his own.

David Soul – Silver Lady
"Smile! Alright, don't overdo it" Noel commands a whole line of ladies, in his sharp suit looking briefly like a dressed down, swapped sexes version of the Parallel Lines cover. Soul wanders around as before, Leo Sayer sees us out, and in the middle a very strange moment with Noel and a single, unidentified older woman. "Now Kim, tell me about the brand new single you... oh, sorry, we don't have time, we'll find out about that later... she's livid, but it was only a joke. Bye bye." What? How? Why?

TOTP 29/9/77 (tx 25/10/12): goodbuzzingcoolwalkinghightalkingfastlivingevergivingcoolfizzin... Stewpot

An actual recap by me of a show actually that went out! I know!

We start with a close-up of... some sort of robot. It's being held, it turns out, by Ed Stewart, who pretends it actually is Tony Blackburn before hurredly adding before Oxygene drowns him out "Tony's lost his voice, I'm here instead, so welcome!" It must be some tonsil problem Tony had as he didn't reappear on the show for two and a half months. Unless there's something else... he did seperate from Tessa Wyatt in autumn 1977*, it says here... As for Stewport we saw him cadging for names for the new dance troupe eleven months ago and he did a wiped show in December '76, but this would be his thirtieth and last TOTP fling before concentrating on Junior Choice and Crackerjack, two shows you'd imagine would require quite some concentration.

(* Tony says the famous on-air breakdown was in October 1976 but he seemed quite chipper doing a show that month, even having time to pop down the T-shirt printers, so who knows really)

Rose Royce – Do Your Dance
So none of them are actually half-cleaned Escorts? I feel I've been lied to. No excuse for a file photo any more, they've come mob handed, big horn section, guitarist and bassist grinning madly at each other, Rose Norwalt/Gwen Dickey - one and the same - and her exotic braids seemingly singing into a rose (do you see?) at first, though it's just next to the mike. Backing vocalists sprout up all over the place, from congas to middle trumpet. There's the mark of a band not taking any chances with the orchestra.

David Soul – Silver Lady
Still no sign of him in this country but he's happy enough walking the streets and hills of... somewhere American. In the grand mid-70s tradition we saw Leo Sayer also uphold last week it's a clip made entirely by pointing a camera at the star and getting him to wander aimlessly, pausing at one point to shake somebody's hand. That's how famous he is, and also how casual he slips into his fame. Like Leo, lipsync and matching the edit to the song's rhythmic pace are for other people. Unlike Leo, he's got a motorbike to swank about on for a bit and some well tended gardens to shepherd his lady through.

Bob Marley & The Wailers – Waiting In Vain
Legs & Co, and nothing says Rastafari irie like some waltzing in dresses made from net curtains. Cream jackets offset all the skirt swishing about and transparency. What this has to do with the song or rhythm... maybe they didn't have too much time.

Peter Blake – Lipsmackin' Rock 'N' Rollin'
Not that Peter Blake, but the one who would go on to play Kirk St Moritz in Dear John. You remember. Introduced as "a newcomer to TOTP" for now he's a stereotypical rock and roll revivalist and one who's aware of what that means at this precise moment too - studded leather jacket, pompadour quiff, vintage Levis - to distract from the fact that he's also a poor second to Danny Williams as a song derived from a drink advert. The audience in the round are for their part swaying gladly and Blake's going to play to them, running his hand through one girl's hair in passing, realising that wasn't the wisest option and seemingly slapping another upside the head. Intriguingly, the verse tune is practically identical to the following year's Greased Lightning, pre-chorus pauses and all. You can definitely sing one over the other. There's even a dubious car reference towards the end. Hmmm...

Ram Jam – Black Betty
"Tomorrow Radio 1 is ten years old and so is Radio 2. Welcome Ram Jam at number 18!" Surely there was supposed to be something in the middle there. TOTP did actually have a special edition for the station's fifteenth birthday, from which show the celebrated DJs dancing to Adam Ant clip comes (and Jocky Wilson Said, actually). As for Ram Jam they're playing in someone's garden being watched by all manner of dubious characters, including two girls on a stationary motorbike, one holding a plastic cup, and one man dancing and clapping wildly above his head who seems to have invegilated himself among the band. He's actually standing next to the drum riser. Ram Jam look much as you'd imagine they would. Just before the end we see two men off to the far side having a chat while leaning against some abandoned amps, apparently unaware that rock is occurring just next to them.

David Essex – Cool Out Tonight
The show's moving at a fair old clip tonight, without apparent extra modern editing we're six songs in after twelve and a half minutes. Playing in front of a humungous glitterball and a two thirds as large baseball David's permanently got his guitar on tonight and the saxophonist still isn't touching the instrument that's strapped to him when there's a tambourine to shake instead. The middle eight sees David's head briefly encased in an oval frame, because that's what successful people get. Probably. Something else that happens to famous people is nobody advises them not to ad lib "ba boom ba dum" mid-line. "A good year for David" Stewpot surmises.

The Stylistics – I Plead Guilty
It doesn't bode well that the orchestra turn the intro into contemporary family sitcom incidental music, I know that much. Stewpot's link is entirely off camera, which kind of fits the commercial and critical downslide the band are on - this didn't chart and they'd never make the top 75 again, though being TOTP they'd be back in the studio once more in 1978. Russell Thompkins Jr still looks permanently surprised but he somehow fits the band uniform of canary yellow better. Incidentally the Stylistics are in the country for the whole of November. Two of these five, not including Thompkins Jr, remain. It's unclear whether the one sporting the same hair and beard arrangement as Peter Sutcliffe is one.

Donna Summer – I Remember Yesterday
What at first looks like a video purely of stills turns into Donna in full white suit with bow tie and top hat doing cabaret dancing on the spot in a spotlight. Her miming clarinet playing would do Flick proud. It's all very nice but this isn't the futuro-diva we were promised a couple of months back.

Golden Earring – Radar Love
"A sound with a difference" Stewpot calls this, which is curious for a show that's already featured Black Betty. They may actually be playing live, there's certainly the ballsy commitment and muso concentration to suggest so as singer Barry Hay thrusts forward in his red wrapround shades. The drummer fancies himself for notice in a Bruce Lee (later Kill Bill) replica tracksuit. Of course the audience are unsure what to make of this rhythm and rock explosion. How's he got his hands wet inside the car? Window broken?

Elvis Presley – Way Down
And this week's iteration of Legs & Co sees Sue and Rosie... not there. Maybe they got bored of the same song again and again after weeks of I Feel Love too. The remaining Legs are paired off, one on the stage opposite Toppotron™, one on the nearer side, all in a very thrown together outfit of pink bra and pants with remnants of a grass skirt attached to the latter. We know they're not averse to digging out old costumes but such is the half-light they're performing in it really wouldn't make a difference here. In the audience one couple embark on what looks like the full American Smooth. There's a couple of others pairing off, but the overall dancing message is confused. And that's it? Not quite, as Stewpot has one last guest, a "young man" responsible for both this week's playout and the chart still of the week:



With a shirt on this time, though. That'll be Giorgio Moroder, then, pleased to report it's "number one in the discos in the States" and mentioning he "found Donna in Munich three years ago" like she was lost property. Stewpot hopes he'll be "doing well with her and yourself" before a tremendously camp "OK? Byeeeeee!" flourish to finish his stint. Somewhere Tony Blackburn opens another packet of lozenges and phones his lawyer.

TOTP 22/9/77 (tx 18/10/12) open thread

I'm not being much help at the moment, am I? Two missing weeks and now being away on 'business' for a few days. So it's another comments box free for all as, having neatly skipped a fortnight's turnaround, we find a load of new-to-BBC4 clips, though the same old number one's there.

Hank The Knife & The Jets – Guitar King
La Belle Epoque – Black Is Black
The Stranglers – No More Heroes
The Emotions – Best Of My Love (Legs & Co)
Leo Sayer – Thunder In My Heart
Baccara – Yes Sir I Can Boogie
The Boomtown Rats – Looking After Number 1
Meri Wilson – Telephone Man
Stardust – Ariana
Elvis Presley – Way Down (Legs & Co semi-repeat)

The disappeared: 15/9/77

Well, sort of. You know the circumstances, let's just get to this one and try to ride out the inevitable flamewar together, shall we?

Dr Feelgood – She's A Wind Up
Despite their previous album success we'll have to wait until 1979 before they crack the top 30 but they'll make a good handful of appearances before then. Lee's bought a new, specially patterned jacket for the occasion.



Yvonne Elliman – I Can’t Get You Out Of My Mind
The video again.

The Dooleys – Think I’m Gonna Fall In Love With You
Don't know whether this is a repeat or not, but if the latter I can't imagine it's going to look or sound all that different.

David Soul – Silver Lady
Video, repeated in time.

Donna Summer – Down Deep Inside (Theme From The Deep)
This Legs & Co routine was on YouTube literally days ago but the account has been closed. Hmm. I can tell you it's Sue's turn for a holiday and the standard seems to be "floaty dresses".

Danny Mirror – I Remember Elvis Presley
Philips, the label which put this out, must have put all leave on hold, Elvis died on August 16th and this entered the top 50 for week beginning 11th September. Mirror was actually a Dutchman by the name of Eddy Ouwens and had co-written 1975 Eurovision winner Ding A Dong. Unfortunately this will be on again.

Elkie Brooks – Sunshine After The Rain
Repeat.

Generation X – Your Generation
Another sole appearance for the song, but far from Billy Idol's only visit (or the band's, come to that) Would the lighting effects here clash with modern strobe/epilepsy warnings?



Patsy Gallant – From New York To L.A.
It seems this is pretty much a French-Canadian equivalent of Cliff going disco. It's said Gallant turned up to introduce this herself, which seems sporting to give someone such a lift on their first and only hit the week it entered the top 30, though it's possible she arrived at the studio and only then found her work permit didn't allow her to perform. She can't have made much of an impression as despite peaking at number 6 we don't see it again. I don't think this is the actual video but it's the best YouTube can do.



Elvis Presley – Way Down
Via One For The Dads. For some reason they're wearing their Roadrunner outfits.

The disappeared: 8/9/77

So we reach the final actually wiped TOTP of them all, unless there's some been misplaced or not left in good condition since then. There's weeks not represented in the TOTP archive in future, whether through strike action (for more on which, wait til 2015) or sporting action - three in 1978, for instance - but from here on the document of pop music is pretty much complete. For now we lose Kid in a pink pinstriped T-shirt introducing first The Emotions' Best Of My Love over the rundown, and subsequently...

The Motors – Dancing The Night Away
Somewhere between rhythm and rock and the kind of Chris Spedding-influenced earnest drivetime fare we're seeing every so often, this would make its, but not their, only appearance. Kind of imagine it'd be a lot of men looking hard.

Space – Magic Fly
Mummy, make the spooky aliens and their funny wavey lines go away.

Rosetta Stone – Sunshine Of Your Love
Yes, that Sunshine Of Your Love. Rosetta Stone were other charges of Tam 'Rollers' Paton and included Ian Mitchell, who'd been a Roller for seven months of 1977. What they're trying to be (Smokie) and what they are (Dead End Kids) are very different things.

Jean-Michel Jarre – Oxygene Part IV
Legs & Co... what do we reckon? Too early for robot dancing and bodypopping, but lots of stiff limb movements and head turning? Lots of blue flourescent light, surely. EDIT: Actually we don't need to ask, as thanks to One For The Dads' Andee Bee here's just under a minute of it and, of course, it turns out to be not much at all of the above.

Blue – Bring Back The Love
For all its TOTP exposure and chummy looks to camera Gonna Capture Your Heart only reached number 18 and this didn't chart at all, becoming the last we'd see of them. More playing to the gallery, that's what they needed. Also, not this song.

The Boomtown Rats – Lookin' After Number 1
And...punch! And back! And...punch!

Meri Wilson – Telephone Man
Not to be confused with Mari Wilson, as even her Wiki page says. Video for post-Chanson d'Amour/post-My Ding-A-Ling trimphone jingle novelty hit which we'll see soon enough.

Black Gorilla – Gimme Dat Banana
Ah, thanks to newfangled technol we've got this one, its only appearance:



See, not as Black & White Minstrel Show-still-on-telly dubious as it sounds, if still proving unlikely to be covered any time soon. Described as 'krautrock disco' on Discogs.com, which is ambitious. A couple of them went on to become prolific session men.

The Rods – Do Anything You Wanna Do
As you see at the end of that clip, Kid's a bit smug about his rhythm and rock predictive skills. Repeat.

Elvis Presley – Way Down
Crowd dancing next to Toppotron™ stills, it says here. You'd expect little less. Good love!

TOTP 1/9/77 (tx 4/10/12): the long one

Tony greets us straightforwardly into a countdown backed by Meri Wilson's Telephone Man. Meri Wilson's Telephone Man! It's unlikely the show ever chose a less comfortably fitting track for a fastpaced chart rundown.

Hudson-Ford – Are You Dancing?
In which two former Strawbs attempt to get hep. Hang on - big curly mass of fair hair and at least developing facial hair, big dark glasses, prominent cellos, hint of disco being taken on board... Jeff Lynne? Is that you? He's got the better look than his colleague, who seems to have pioneered the look of Andy from Little Britain. They actually do go back to back for the instrumental break, but that doesn't hide they have a third guitarist doing the solo. When does he get his name in the business title? Tony announces it'll be Noel's record of the week, just to put the mockers on it completely.

Yvonne Elliman – I Can’t Get You Out Of My Mind
She seems to have been in the top 30 for most of these eighteen months but this video is the first we've actually seen of her. The video format is of course very much in its primacy, hence this is Elliman in all her a-bit-like-Coolidge form, or possibly what Scott Gorham of Thin Lizzy would actually look like as a woman, standing in front of a lightly blowing wind machine in a kaftan, and then during the second verse someone turns the front lights out for a bit.

Elvis Costello – Red Shoes



No, hang on, that's not it. Costello's debut, backed by the Attractions, and I wonder if the TOTP reworking was his first recording with them - they made their live debut with Elvis seven weeks earlier, the US band Clover (most of whom became Huey Lewis' News) back him on the original and they're not on the following single either. Playing in front of what is a white spiral this week, Elvis is the angry nerd of early infamy, staring down the camera sneering and angry as he goes, taking advantage of every close-up and pull shot, as if all this was somehow our fault. Drummer Pete Thomas' T-shirt reads 'ELVIS Original P(something)' and he's in firing mode too, drumrolling and cymbal crashing well into the link out. "Why not? You can't get done for it" claims Tony. About the wearing, not the drumming.

David Soul – Silver Lady
Legs & Co without Lulu or Rosie but with... go on, guess. Yes, silver outfits. Flimsy chain mail skirts and bra tops, in fact. Despite much early promise of bum-waggling it's fairly standard prancing and the two increasingly common move, holding up the arms while moving sideways and striding forward with chest forward like a Tex Avery suited cartoon villain. Tony plugs Starsky & Hutch, Saturday 9pm on BBC1. Don't actually watch at that time in expectation.

Steve Gibbons Band – Tulane
The original is 45 minutes long yet they kept a repeat (the first appearance) of this in?

The Jacksons – Dreamer
A close-up of some lights provides a divider between that film and this video. No Randy, for some reason, and he's not missing a lot as the other four, Michael very much in the foreground and getting to hold a yellow mike that looks like a ball and cup game, sit on stools in bow tie, frilly shirt and blue suits against a green screen backdrop achieved by panning across some stretched out wallpaper patterns. They're all sitting in different ways, interestingly, Michael side-on to be better in the full band shots, one at 45 degrees, one bandy-legged, one with the left leg casually around the side. At no point do they get up from the stools and walk towards the camera. Look and learn, modern bands.

Elkie Brooks – Sunshine After The Rain
Back in her finest overalls. Well, not back per se, as it's a repeat. Tony draws particular specific attention to the melody.

Joe Dolan – I Need You
And you thought Enge seemed out of place in 1973. Big cabaret night pop had a presence throughout the decade and Irish easy listening hero Dolan, whom Tony notes "hasn't had a release out in this country for a long, long time", knows his place when it comes to theatrical stylings. On a stage not long vacated by Costello, for contrast, this essential rewrite of Demis' Forever And Ever is patterned by moments of Dolan bursting into big flamboyant phrases pitched several keys above the tune before experimenting in alarming laryngitis-esque falsetto. Gesturing in the backing vocals, pointing at the camera - he knows his showbiz alright. The audience even look slightly engaged. "Wow, some of those high notes!" Tony muses as the four women around him clap appreciatively in a way we've never seen the people gathered around a presenter do before.

The Dooleys – Think I’m Gonna Fall In Love With You
Repeat. She'll catch her death.

Nazareth – Love Hurts
Soft rock's turn to strike a blow, big Marshall amps and all. Dan McCafferty, clad in white trousers and what can only be described as a flowery blouse, emotes like a man hurt. The drummer in his big beard and shrunk-to-fit-naturally cap sleeve vest seems like he came from central rock casting.

Candi Staton – Nights On Broadway
More flashing lights lead in the video, so even more flashing lights. Consider it a glamorous take on road safety Public Information Films.

Mink De Ville – Spanish Stroll
Tony suggests we've never been to Spain with him. Well, no, Tony. Video again. "I didn't understand a word of that, did you?" Tony mugs afterwards.

David Essex – Cool Out Tonight
Tony has some more plugging to do. "Tuesday, eight o'clock, I want you to remember this, on BBC television, David Essex starts the first of his brand new series of six shows". Yes, but when does he finish it? And again, don't actually watch at that time in expectation. Well versed in showbiz performance as he is, David has full command of matey side-on looks to camera and keeps the power of surprise, producing a rhythm guitar halfway through. Shame he's forced his saxophonist to come along as the man has nothing to do with the instrument despite keeping it strapped on - union getting uppity? - and has to increasingly listlessly shake a tambourine, being positioned right behind Essex's left shoulder in straight on shots not helping his cause much. And one more blow for light entertainment, David's elaborate bow to the audience in the background as Tony starts talking again.

Carly Simon – Nobody Does It Better
A Legs & Co repeat, maybe to prove that they really were well covered after all.

Elvis Presley – Way Down
And a third Legs & Co appearance! It's not so long - months, come to think of it - since they wouldn't let us see more than one dance on the same show edit, possibly thinking we'd all get overexcited, hyperventilate and black out. But here they are again in the same outfits as for Silver Lady, shot entirely from one stage right and from the back with Sue in the foreground, doing at least three different routines at once to begin with before falling into formation prancing, facing a Toppotron™ slide projection of his photos as between those two points kids shuffle awkwardly. At least one teenage male seems to be doing it ironically. It briefly looks like the girls are going to keep going regardless of what the music's doing but they notice and slowly gyrate to a standstill before applauding everyone else for dancing, which is big of them. Tony continues his one man Radio Times recital by plugging his morning Radio 1 show and Magic Fly plus lots of close-ups of lights sees us out.