The OnionVerified account

@TheOnion

America's Finest News Source.

theonion.com
Joined March 2008
25.3K Photos and videos Photos and videos

Tweets

You blocked @TheOnion

Are you sure you want to view these Tweets? Viewing Tweets won't unblock @TheOnion

  1. Pinned Tweet
    Mar 2

    Report: We Don’t Make Any Money If You Don’t Click The Fucking Link

    249 replies 3,071 retweets 13,018 likes
    Undo
  2. 10 minutes ago

    Eagles Hang Beer-Drenched, Charred Super Bowl Banner

    8 replies 72 retweets 277 likes
    Undo
  3. 41 minutes ago

    White House Counsel To Step Down In Fall ?

    4 replies 161 retweets 770 likes
    Undo
  4. 1 hour ago

    Praying Mantis Hesitantly Agrees To Try Girlfriend’s Sexual Fantasy Of Eating His Head During Intercourse

    27 replies 394 retweets 1,949 likes
    Undo
  5. Retweeted
    2 hours ago

    Heartwarming: When This Subway Employee Had To Walk 20 Miles To Work Because He Couldn’t Afford A Car, The CEO Of Subway Drove Alongside Him To Cheer Him On

    10 replies 296 retweets 1,288 likes
    Undo
  6. 2 hours ago

    Political Scientists Reassure Americans That Stripping Minorities Of Citizenship Usually Where Descent Into Fascism Peters Out

    11 replies 504 retweets 1,240 likes
    Undo
  7. 3 hours ago

    Ryan Zinke Calls For Legislation To Slow Down Destruction Of Wildlife So He Can Truly Savor Every Minute Of It

    11 replies 194 retweets 859 likes
    Undo
  8. 3 hours ago

    Do The Buccaneers Regret Bringing In A Sexual Predator To Mentor Jameis Winston?

    8 replies 41 retweets 202 likes
    Undo
  9. 4 hours ago

    NRA Praised For Decreasing Stigma Of Mentally Ill Acquiring Firearms

    24 replies 199 retweets 997 likes
    Undo
  10. 4 hours ago

    Woman Who Has Been Let Down By So Many Leave-In Conditioners Can’t Bear To Put Herself Out There Again

    16 replies 151 retweets 1,013 likes
    Undo
  11. 5 hours ago

    Man Wishes There Was Some Sort Of Sign He Could Put On His House To Let Visitors Know He Has Gone Fishing

    10 replies 141 retweets 1,301 likes
    Undo
  12. 5 hours ago

    Report Finds Poor Often Hit Hardest By 18-Wheelers

    21 replies 131 retweets 911 likes
    Undo
  13. 6 hours ago

    Nick Foles Reveals He Turned Down Big Volunteer Opportunities At Church To Remain With Eagles

    8 replies 110 retweets 621 likes
    Undo
  14. 6 hours ago

    White Supremacist Living Fulfilling Racist Life Since Getting Kicked Offline

    22 replies 135 retweets 917 likes
    Undo
  15. 7 hours ago

    U.S. Judge Bans 3D-Printed Gun Blueprints ?

    5 replies 44 retweets 361 likes
    Undo
  16. 7 hours ago

    Report: Female Interns Earn Only Three-Fourths Of College Credit That Male Counterparts Do

    10 replies 109 retweets 819 likes
    Undo
  17. 8 hours ago

    Shoddy Chinese-Made Stock Market Collapses

    9 replies 61 retweets 525 likes
    Undo
  18. 9 hours ago

    5-Year-Old At Underfunded Kindergarten Enjoying Last Few Weeks Before Achievement Gap Kicks In

    17 replies 303 retweets 2,032 likes
    Undo
  19. 10 hours ago

    Today's Weather Report

    6 replies 49 retweets 260 likes
    Undo
  20. 17 hours ago

    Investigators Blame Stupidity In Area Death

    17 replies 128 retweets 970 likes
    Undo
  21. 18 hours ago

    National News Highlights

    11 replies 42 retweets 226 likes
    Undo

@TheOnion hasn't Tweeted yet.

Loading seems to be taking a while.

Twitter may be over capacity or experiencing a momentary hiccup. Try again or visit Twitter Status for more information.

    You may also like

    ·