beck eleven

@beckeleven

Professional mincer of words. Listens to people speaking. Regurgitates it on a keyboard. Freelancer. Feminist. Felines. Columnist in The Press.

Christchurch, New Zealand
beckeleven.co.nz
Joined December 2009
6,162 Photos and videos Photos and videos

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  1. Pinned Tweet
    13 hours ago

    If you are a rubbish time manager, like me, and wondering how to get the best out of your day, here's my column this week on a new book. Brazenly nicked from an RNZ interview. Fascinating stuff on the science of when to do things.

    1 reply 3 retweets 17 likes
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  2. Retweeted
    5 hours ago

    Vi Hart always fascinating Hexaflexagons

    7 replies 13 retweets 22 likes
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  3. 4 hours ago

    "You disgusting, despicable … farthead!'" Couples. divorced but still living together.

    1 reply
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  4. 5 hours ago

    Wtf? I’m on my porch and I can hear two passers by luring PussPuss in “come here beautiful boy”. And they got a touch!

    6 replies 19 likes
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  5. 7 hours ago

    Probably shouldn’t have eaten 6 greengages. I guess we’ll find out.

    4 replies 8 likes
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  6. Retweeted
    8 hours ago

    The plural of beef is beeves.

    33 replies 16 retweets 138 likes
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  7. Retweeted
    11 hours ago

    This is Honey, her owner is taking her on a road trip of NZ cos sadly she has untreatable cancer, say hello if you see her cos she’s a honey and loves pats.

    6 replies 28 retweets 126 likes
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  8. Retweeted
    11 hours ago

    The tomatoes are coming along nicely

    3 replies 8 retweets 63 likes
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  9. 13 hours ago

    On Sunday is staying but I’ll be away, so that rips my nightie - however these guys are THRILLED.

    9 replies 56 likes
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  10. 13 hours ago

    Happy birthday may you ROLL STING in our lives forever. But also, just have some time with friends and family, if you must.

    1 reply 21 likes
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  11. Retweeted
    19 hours ago

    Is it finally time to bring dental care into the free health care system? - cartoon by about dental care inequality in today's Press:

    22 replies 71 retweets 164 likes
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  12. 14 hours ago

    Hello. I am the woman walking around going “ouch, ow, yeowwww” every few minutes at the supermarket because today the shelves and I are exchanging a lot of electricity.

    16 replies 36 likes
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  13. Retweeted
    Feb 8

    This was tough to write, over-considered if anything. I was trying to address trolling without sinking to that level:

    11 replies 6 retweets 28 likes
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  14. Feb 9

    Love is...patting Judi as she’s crouched in the loaf position in the hallway and saying “you’re such a good loaf. You’re the Vogel’s of loaves”.

    17 likes
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  15. Feb 9

    Totally recommend watching all over again but this time with subtitles so you don’t miss all the great lines. Such as “why the here...” instead of “why the hell...”.

    6 replies 16 likes
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  16. Feb 9

    Love is....angling your laptop so your cat can rub her cheek on it properly even tho it means you can’t see the screen as well as before.

    2 replies 2 retweets 50 likes
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  17. Retweeted
    Feb 9

    My bit on Katie Hopkins's turn as a ketamine-fuelled foreign correspondent in South Africa

    167 replies 402 retweets 1,540 likes
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  18. Retweeted
    Feb 7

    Yes, so I wrote a thing. It’s pretty personal, so be nice. And if you can’t be nice, do it elsewhere.

    Love this essay on life in a fat body by the brilliant . Heaps of relatable “oof” moments in here but this one hit me hard - at high school a boy who liked me told me other people thought I was “fugly” lol what a charmer 😅
    54 replies 37 retweets 270 likes
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  19. Retweeted
    Feb 8

    Buddy, the bar for your return was set SO low. The only instruction was to “stay away from the corpses for awhile, bro.”

    152 replies 2,677 retweets 7,610 likes
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  20. Retweeted
    Feb 7

    After ’s old opiate habit unexpectedly came back via pain meds and he had to kick one more time, he retched, shuddered – and wrote this about the folly of running down our addiction services. Kia kaha.

    1 reply 17 retweets 37 likes
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