Beastly

Holy fuck, are you ready to fall in love with an obscure bit of punkified metal from the bullshit state of New Jersey? This gem was released in 1983 on the great Mutha Records, the concern that brought the world the brilliant Chronic Sick EP Cutest Band In Hardcore. The Beast were often associated with the Metal scene due to their contributions to the early Megaforce comp Born to Metalize, and while The Beast's material on that record are decent enough, they are by no means as awesome as the four blazing tracks on this EP. In fact, this isn't too far from what Chronic Sick were laying down. The opening track "The Beast" is the band's mission statement, it establishes The Beast as a no bullshit crew of leather jacket wrapped Jersey toughs who simply don't give a fuck, but can still lay down the hooks. This becomes more and more evident over the course of the next three songs. The secret weapons here are the absolutely charm slathered vocals of Scott Ruth. The guy is Danzig without the fanboy horror nerdisms, Rollins without the Manson/Jim Morrison affectations, but still remains Scott Ruth, Long Branch badass wise guy. Seriously, my words can't do this justice. This is one of those rare records that almost makes you ache this band didn't record more material. The amazing Devil Dick over at The Devil's Music Blog wrote a great and informative piece on The Beast and Mutha Records here, I'm going to shut up now, my ramblings shouldn't keep you from this bit of genius any longer.

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Iscariot

Iscariot were a gaggle of Heavy Metal hopefuls from Portland, Oregon. A bullshit town known mostly for  craft beer and rain. In 1985 the band cranked out one cassette demo and it's not bad, not bad at all. Traditional Heavy Metal is served here with tinges of classic Doom. Dragons, kings, and demons provide lyrical inspiration and keep the proceedings fairly orthodox in the approach. I have asked a few Portlanders I know if they have any info on Iscariot, what became of them?  But, alas, the info is as scarce as the eye teeth of a unicorn.

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Stay True Or Die!!!

THIS BLOG IS NOT DEAD!!! Okay with that out of the way allow me to introduce you to a band I recently stumbled across who just blew me away with a youthful vigor and unyielding love for real Heavy Metal. No retro cool, no ironic facial hair, no tattoos, just five baby faced bangers from Daly City calling themselves Hell Fire. These duders are just barely out of high school and already outplaying many of the seasoned Shreddy Roosevelts out there, and doing it on some right crappy gear no less. Kind of sounding like the classic German bands Grave Digger and Helloween, Hell Fire also inject a bit of Bay Area dirt head thrash in their trip. They were cool enough to flow me this cool CDR demo with a the humble caveat that this is a bit outdated and may not be the best representation of the band. I tend to agree, the drums are a bit "suspicious" sounding and this piece of plastic can in no way truly convey the sheer joy of playing and charm Hell Fire overflow with in the live setting. Seriously, support these kids, they absolutely deserve it. 

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Metallic Storm

I think it's about time for another obscure compilation of spotty Heavy metal. Metallic Storm first dropped in 1982 courtesy of Ebony Records out of the UK. As far as I can tell, Ebony's sole output was a myriad of slapdash samplers of lesser known NWOBHM and Hard Rock, usually peppered with a few hidden gems, Metallic Storm, however, packs a lot of rough diamonds, and an early appearance by a young band from Denmark calling themselves Mercyful Fate. Following the King and his plucky pack of Danes comes the Econo-Judas Priest via Sunset Strip coke pablum from Tantrum, no thanks. Scimitar deliver an awesome charmer of a NWOBHM style tune called "That's The Way I Want It To Be." The unappealingly named Tarot Sutra contribute a clumsy 70's rocker that brings to mind images of wood -paneled dens, dirt weed and high school talent contests. Mean Machine are a hot mess of AC/DC-esque biker drool. I fucking love them. Confessor (not that one) are up next with an oddball keyboard and flange-slathered number that kind of comes off like W.A.S.P. meets The Stranglers. Jury show up in a glittery coke chariot of AOR schmaltz, but still not terrible. Wells Fargo (the band, not the bank) are pretty bad all around, but still better than Tantrum, they sound kind of drunk, I dig 'em. Mercinary are the blandest of the bunch, no real magic. Wykkyd Vikker are as corny as their name would indicate.  Pentapus kind of sound like the younger brothers of those dirtbags in Mean Machine with their very NWOBHMish bath tub amphetamine scooter bitch rock. Detroit border on some cummy booger sugar mean street meandering with a confusing number called "USA Light," but even this one is pretty enjoyable, sleazy, poorly recorded... what's not to like. Moby Dick aren't nearly as heavy or dicky as their name might indicate, but their peppy AOR inspired pop metal is pretty infectious. All in all, Metallic Storm is a ridiculously fun listen, with every band (with the exception of Tantrum) offering something of value in their material. Also it almost seems that every band (with the exception of Mercyful Fate) are drunk. Metallic Storm may be a great album to get absolutely blotto blackout with. I fucking love this record. I think you will too.

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Mystery Girl

Storyteller, a rather low rent NWOBHM concern managed to eke out one awkward one single called Mystery Girl.  The A-side is a catchy but utterly inane song about a mysterious female that you see at a party and a nightclub, she dances, you see her, she disappears. Nobody knows her, she's a fucking mystery. For a band called Storyteller, they completely fail to spin any kind of tangible yarn with this song. The B-Side is a neon-beer sign scorcher called "Easy Living." Storyteller dropped this little bit of generica in 1985, a bit late in the game for the NWOBHM scene. No real mystery why Storyteller didn't rocket to superstardom.

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Doomsday

Doomsday for the Deceiver was Flotsam and Jetsam's debut and the only album to feature some guy named Jason who soon after became a millionaire with a terrible haircut. Flotsam and Jetsam were one of those bands that sat on the fence between Heavy Metal and the new Thrash, sometimes being referred to as "Speed Metal." Doomsday for the Deceiver is a plucky energetic album full of razor-sharp riffing and top notch performances from all involved, particularly the Jason kid. It is easy to understand why that rich band would want to snatch this kid up and totally mix him out of their albums. My only beef with Doomsday... is the songs seldom shift outside of the formula, plaguing a great album with a bit of sameness and lack of dynamics. But fuck if this band wasn't already at the top of their game on their first album, these dudes did their homework. This is a great for careening down a highway or ripping a drained pool on your stick. The pace is relentless. Protect your neck, son.

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Trippin'

Rock Clef were a hopeful young band of Southern California suburban stoners who chipped in and pressed their own little scorcher of a single in 1983. The A-side is a somewhat generic AOR rocker, but the payoff is the B-side "Trippin'" a somewhat NWOBHM slunkster about getting fucked up. Strange thing about this one is that both songs seem to fade out at awkward places, giving the impression that Rock Clef only wanted to give you a sampling of their rocking prowess. Maybe the only reason to make this was to catch the attention of some shrewd record industry assholes, but needless to say, that didn't pan out.

Trip Out

Solid Rock

Bollweevil's contribution to the growing list obscure NWOBHM relics by bands that only released one single is this plucky little gem. The A side is a rookie rocker with great fuzzy tones and lyrics about rocking. The B side is a more 70s hard rock number with a mellow intro. Bollweevil have an amateurish charm in their clumsy and overly stiff playing. Rock Solid!!!

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Shakespeare

Shakespeare were from the bullshit town of Eskilstuna Sweden known mostly for stainless steel and handball. You know the drill, these Svenne youth release one fucking amazing single, fail to rocket to superstardom, and go back to working at the Volvo factory. Meanwhile an incredible record drifts further and further away into legend.

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Breakout!

Here's an absolutely essential bit of hard rocking metal from a sadly overlooked Australian band called Taipan. The band released a single, couple of EPs and then called it quits in 1986. However, Taipan resurfaced in 2007 and has since released three albums. This EP sometimes called Taipan and sometimes called Breakout was released in 1984, and contains four catchy NWOBHM inspired rockers. Seriously mandatory.

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Smokin'

Smokin' Roadie had a stupid name and were often associated with the NWOBHM scene, but musically, these guys played pretty awesome AOR/Power Pop with fantastic hooks. Their short run only yielded this great single and an incredible demo. Then the band opted for a better name (Tempest) for one more single before calling it quits. If anyone has that Tempest EP, please please please upload and send a link. Midnight just may be one of the greatest NWOBHM singles ever. Don't take my word for it.

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Lord Ryur

Here's the one and only release from Montreal band Lord Ryur, and Jesus fuck, what a record it is. This obscure single contains two of the coolest Heavy Metal songs you will ever hear. Excellent hooks, and vocal melodies and enough interesting moments to fill an entire LP. You will probably want more Lord Ryur, but you won't get it. Enjoy.

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Powers Court

Powers Court is a long running traditional Heavy Metal band from Illinois. The centerpiece of the band's sound is the amazing vocals of Danie Powers. Powers toggles effortlessly between a King Diamond shriek into lower registers (I swear at times she sounds like Mr. Scarface from the Geto Boys as well as a dozen others) Sure, this debut suffers from some sort of oddly flat production, but couple that with the vocal acrobatics of Ms. Powers, and you have another compelling piece of bizarro metal born of the love of steel. Their is a purity-of-intent to Powers Court that makes them a thousand times more interesting than all your Hammerfalls and Rhapsodys combined. Seriously, don't blow this opportunity to spend a little time with one of the strangest and most sincere bits of true American Heavy Metal. Powers Court rules.

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Pray For Metal

Never mind the crazy cover art depicting a topless barbarian princess holding a weird axe in one hand, and precariously balancing a skull in the other while she dances seductively in front of a giant Menorah. There is so much more to this album than all that, well maybe not. You do, however, get four pretty rocking Heavy Metal anthems delivered somewhat sloppily by some spirited lads from Linkoping, a bullshit town known for volleyball and making Saabs.

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This Just In

The Wizard of the second most awesome blog on the interweb, is easily one of my favorite people on earth. We have shared a room, risked life and limb on tour together, and laughed heartily at one another's farts. Today he writes me:

Hi dude. Hope you are well.I got this record in Brasil, shit rules. Bought it from a street vendor who pulled out a bunch of metal when we walked up...well, at least he said it was metal but it was a pile of hopelessly partied on pop punk. I gave up, and then a local dude said I should check this out, said they were the first speed metal band from Brasil, and that they came from Belém, where we were. The vendor put it on, and I was hooked from the drum intro.Not sure what the deal is, but the record appears to have been released (or sponsored) by Pepsi, and please check out how fried (or disabled) Pedro is at the bottom of the band photo - that guy is responsible for these Deep Purple meets Motorhead licks. Tough to scour for info on a band called Stress, but there's a quote on Metal Archives from the singer about how he thinks that they should be considered the true speed metal pioneers since this LP came out a year before Kill 'em All. Pretty ballsy.

The Wizard went on to say that this may be up the alley of The Hearse riders and urged me to share this rare gem of Pepsi-sponsored Brazilian Dirt Metal weirdness. I have already listened to it three times, it is fucking awesome bit of fuzzy guitars, captivating hooks, and just plain out great rocking Heavy Metal. Already know this will be in heavy rotation in the next few weeks. What an amazing find. Thank you Wizard, once again you prove most badass.

STRESS!

Savage Killer

Here's another rare as hen's teeth NWOBHM EP for you. The band Burner hailed from the bullshit town of Ashby-de-la-Zouch, Leicestershire, a town known mainly for leather (cool) and hula hoops (not cool.) Fortunately this little one off record negates the hula hoop thing a bit. The a-side is typically fun NWOBHM rocker about a killer who is savage in his killing. And thankfully Burner doesn't puss out with a ballad on the b-side. Rather the band issues forth another clunky charmer (very similar to the a-side) called "Lay Down Your Arms." Yeah nothing mind-bending here, it's not really hard to understand why Burner couldn't contend with the Maidens and Leppards of the day really, but this still is not without its merits. Cool.

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After Dark

You need some NWOBHM right about now, I can sense it. Your bird ain't right, your boss is a fucking cunt, and even the berks down at your local boozer got you a bit mithered. Fear not, you bloody minge bags, After Dark is here to make everything pukka once again, with their one and lonely little record, a real roister doister of a disc for your bloody saft earholes.

Crikey!

Sin and Mass

Eugene, Oregon isn't exactly a place you would equate with epic Heavy Metal. You might think of drum circles, smelly Anarchists, and Ken Kesey, but probably not the mustached metalions known as Lazarus Sin. Shame really because Intracranial Mass, the band's one and only release is a veritable treasure trove of steely, melodic, metal that deserves more attention. Perhaps the location or the Christian lyrics kept these guys out of the spotlight, who knows?

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Sacred Alien

Here's a rare NWOBHM single that is sweet as diabetes and hotter than a poop. Sacred Alien hailed from the bullshit town of Manchester. A town known mostly for football hooligans and Joy Division. Both songs on this single are worthwhile rockers made better by the charismatic voice of a jerk named Sean Canning. This is one of those rare instances where both sides leave me wanting more. Shame these lads didn't make a full length.

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Kick Me

This self=released single by an obscure Heavy Metal band might be just the thing to cure your blues. There isn't a whole lot of information about Satin Steel coursing through the tubes of the ol' interweb, but my searching did yield this: "The only website dedicated to the '80s rock band from Erie, PA....Satin Steel." The site has plenty of information regarding the history of the band, some great photos, and even a track that didn't appear on this single, the only official Satin Steel release. The a side "Kick Me Where It Hurts" is a slunky, hooky rocker. The b side kicks it up a notch with the oddly titled "Let's Not Die." Despite releasing a great little record that got some airplay and critical acclaim, and a move to Hollywood, Satin Steel never cracked the big leagues. Seriously, bro/sis, I know shit has been getting to you lately, just sit back, pop open a brew, and let Satin Steel make it okay.

KICK ME