This is the story of Bridget and Annie, who share a flat in London. They have a neighbour, Nick. Nick fancies Bridget. But Annie fancies Nick. That's the way it is until Bridget gets a letter from Argentina. Stand by for Extra. Gigi! Did you get my message? Please, call me. Love, John. PS: Did you get the flowers? Is he stupid? I told you last night it's finished. Sorry. B. (and don't call me Gigi) Yes, John? Yes, I got the cards and the flowers and the chocolates. Yes. And I got the cushion as well. But it's finished. Sorry. But please don't leave me. Don't cry. I love you so much. Goodbye. Oh, and happy birthday. Ah, men! Come on, Charlie. Come on. Post, Bridget. Charlie and I have the post, haven't we, Charlie? Give me the post, Charlie. Give me the post, Charlie. Drop it, Charlie. Oh, good boy! Telephone bill, gas bill, electricity bill. What's this? A parcel for you, Bridget. Good. What is it? Oh, it's from Mother. 'Bridget darling, this arrived for you and I made you this. 'Love, Mummy.' Oh, very you, Bridget. Mother! Ooh, this is from Argentina. Argentina? Who from? What does it say? Erm, it says, 'Hello, do you remember me?' No. 'Seven years ago we was penpals. 'We was…' We were penpals. Oh, yeah, now I remember. It's Hector. Who's Hector? He was my penpal seven years ago. Oh. 'I speak English good now…' I speak English good. I speak English well now… '.. and I am coming to England.' Ooh, Latin Americans! 'I would like to sleep with you.' 'Do you have a bed for me?' Oh, he wants to stay here. But, erm, what about the rules? Ooh, a Latin American here. Ooh, like Ricky Martin! Tall, handsome… Rich. So, erm, when is he coming? Oh, erm, let me see. It says…November 5th. Oh, November 5th. But that's… Today! Oh, it's you, Nick. Hi, babes! Hello, Nick. How are you? Great. Nice muscles. Here's your milk. Our milk? You mean our milk you borrowed three weeks ago? Oh, thanks, Nick. I forget nothing! Would you like a drink, Nick? Would you like a drink, Nick? Uh- huh? I said, 'Would you like a drink, Nick?' Oh! Sorry. No, thanks. Oh, erm, Bridget's friend is coming. Oh, yeah? Uh- huh. From Argentina. Wow! From Argentina! What's she like? She is a he. Huh? Not a girl, a boy. Tough guy, eh? Why don't I show you how to do it properly? Nick, I've told you before, nobody uses my bike. Nobody. Is that clear? Well, why not? Why not? If you touch my bike again, you are out. O- U- T, out. Clear? What? I said… Hello. Hello. I am called Argentina. I am from Hector. You mean, 'I am called Hector.' You are called Hector? Oh, no, no, no. I am called Annie. I am called Annie. No. She means, 'I am called Hector. I am from Argentina.' You are from Argentina? Come in.

• published: 18 Sep 2015
• views: 835