VARIOUS ARTISTS - "The Fucking Rice Harvester Compilation" - Tape - 1996

   Rice Harvester was a zine I made for 20 years. A zine is a bunch of paper that someone scribbled on, photocopied for free at a chain store, and then stapled together to hand out on the street so that someone might understand their feelings. For the fourth issue, I compiled a cassette of punk bands to go with the issue. A cassette is a piece of plastic that houses quarter-inch magnetic tape that somehow magically holds music onto it. You put these cassettes into an even bigger piece of plastic or metal with big clunky buttons. These bigger pieces of plastic or metal used to be found for almost nothing at thrift stores or on the street. Anyway, you push down one of those big, clunky buttons and, if everything is right with the world, actual music comes out...or whatever it is that someone recorded onto that cassette.
   SO, like I was saying, I put together a compilation tape that was given out for free with the free zine. I stole every last cassette from chain stores, sometimes just walking right out the front door with a few boxes of tapes in my arms because fuck capitalism and What Is Anything? The tape consists of some local favorites at the time (local at that time meant Huntsville, AL), bands that I wrote to for a song and some far-flung punk bands that were culled from my friend Joey's compilation LP that he never, ever intended to release. Imagine sending off your exclusive song with the intention of having it appear on this cool LP comp, but then it comes out on a free tape with some crappy zine from Alabama. Fuck yeah life!
   THE CRUMBS, from Miami, FL start it off. They were a RAMONES-loving punk band from Miami. They were all fun and everything, but we stopped setting up shows for them once our friend stopped playing drums for them and they said some sketchy shit about women.
  THE SLOBS, from Cincinnati were a weirdly underrated band from the mid-90's and they played sloppy basement punk. They put out a slew of shit, mostly in 1996 and this song, "Politician" did not appear on any of it, as far as I can tell. It's a funny concept for a song. "I don't wanna be a politician!!" Yeah, that's pretty easily avoidable, but a great thing to sing along to.
    JABBERJAW was a Huntsville punk band who always sounded better live than on tape. I saw these three teenagers play a bunch of different shows around town. They were always great, but could never really channel their enthusiasm onto the recording. I asked them to be on this comp and remember being impressed that they knew how to dub a plane crash sound onto their song. I still am. I can't do that shit....still. I love that this song is about being a dead pilot.
   FUN GIRLS FROM MT PILOT were from Nashville, TN and featured four guys who dressed in drag at their shows. The Huntsville scene really liked them, but I was kinda over them by this point. They were really fun and a good band...super bouncy punk and always a good live show, but I just wasn't too enamored like other folks were. What IS interesting is that they broke up and their singer, Cat went on to be a wrestling manager...like total WWF showman style, but on a DIY level. He wrote some articles in zines about it and seeing the similarities to DIY punk was really interesting. This song might be exclusive, but I'm not sure.
   PROPERTY is from Huntsville. They started in 1994(?) and they're still a band. I'm not sure if they've ever left the southeast US. At that time, their shows often included members of the band running headlong into other members of the band and knocking them across the room, completely ending the song. The 5 members of the band brought a lot of styles to the table, but mostly settled into hardcore and catchy punk. They were always great and fun to watch. I bet they still are. I love this song because the teenage singer's voice (Shane) is cracking and the song is just plain great.
  THE GRUMPIES have been discussed at length here, here and here so I will spare you. The two songs on this tape are from their original demo, which I loved so much that I jumped at the chance to be their drummer when the original one quit.
 SWEATER PUNKS were another Huntsville band and their inclusion here is a mystery to me. I don't remember ever seeing them when I lived in town, but their guitarist Seth was always a solid fixture in bands so I probably trusted this new band of his to be good. My friend Jack (also from AL) did some minor detective work (meaning he asked Seth) and came up with this info: The band only recorded once when Jack went over to try out for the band on drums. So, that's him on this recording. The rest of the band was Seth on guitar and vocals and Greg (not me) on bass. This recording never got vocals put onto it, but the song on here was intended as an instrumental. Later, Joey from the 3D's heard this song and asked Seth to join the band. They re-recorded this song as "Spontaneous Human Combustion". Thanks to Jack and Seth for the info!
    THE CRIMINALS were from Oakland / Berkeley and they recorded an exclusive version of their song at Gilman. That's all I'm gonna say because why do you need to know more info about posers?
   JOEY TAMPON AND THE TOXIC SHOCKS was my old band There is more info about the band here.
   WHITE TRASH SUPERMAN wrote the best punk song of the 90's and I asked if I could put it on this tape. They said yes. You can and should find more info about them here and here.
   THE RICKETS were from Olympia, WA and were maybe the only spikey drunk punk band at that point in the town's history. While everyone else was concentrating on twee pop, minimalist punk and feigning pre-teen innocence even though they were pushing 30, THE RICKETS sang about getting drunk, hating their job, destroying Olympia and getting drunk again. Here. they contribute a song about my friend Janelle because it was the 90's and that's what bands did for some dumb reason.
   CHICKENHEAD was a drunken, chaotic machine. This is the last song they ever recorded on the day they broke up. You can find more info about them here.
   That;s it. Enjoy or don't.

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DECATUR! - City Limit - EP - 1995

    Ever since receiving the excellent LP "I've Got the Bible Belt Around My Throat", I've been on a bit of a tear though music from my home state of Alabama. The record is a document of Alabama punk and it is an excellent collection of early punk and hardcore from all over the state. If you see it, definitely pick the record up. It had me going back through recordings by GNP, THE KNOCKABOUTS, THE JAWAS and so many more. One of the bands that never seemed to get any recognition at all anywhere, ever (except one other blog and now, here) was DECATUR! Decatur is a town in north Alabama that is barely a blip on the map and this band was from there, singing songs about their town and their friends. Their theme song has always been my favorite and is so bouncy and fun. I love it when bands sing about where they're from and name specific locations. With lines like "where Randy's mom runs cheap hotels, where all of my friends end up in jail, Decatur!!", you can't really lose. Once, I was listening to this at the punk house I lived at in Huntsville, AL. My roommate walked in during the line "Carl Stratman was our biggest fan, we owe him one because he let us use his guitar" and then my roommate said "Oh, hey, I bought that guitar off of Carl Stratman" and pointed out a beaten up guitar in the corner. My mind was kinda blown.
    This isn't going to mean a lot to a lot of people who download it, but I think it's definitely worth your time. It's a product of the 90's and there are some clear cut nods towards SUPERCHUNK and that era of pop-punk. Here's what Heath, their singer / guitarist had to say about the band (taken from the now-defunct blog Nostalgia Isn't What it Used to Be...
All four of us grew up in Decatur. Then, all four of us went to Auburn (not because of the band. just coincidentally.) When we formed the band, since we were all from Decatur, we thought it would be funny to name the band that. We put an exclamation mark on the name to differentiate ourselves from the town. :) But yeah, your assumptions were pretty much dead on. All of the songs were about Decatur, and more specifically, about the dynamic between the two high schools. Rob, Eric, and I went to Decatur High, and Lisa went to Austin (we had a song that most Decatur people would get called "I Don't Work at the Rockin' McDonalds and You Don't Hang Out at Morningside" talking about it). It was all supposed to be goofy, and we were definitely a part of the early Green Day, Jawbreaker, Superchunk-influenced bands. The 7" doesn't really give a good cross-section of our style or our sound really, but it is what it is. We were a band from Oct. '94 to Oct. 31,1995, when we played our last show ever at the 40 Watt in Athens, GA, opening for our friends from Auburn, Man or Astroman.

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JOKE - "Joke For USA" - Tape - 1993

    Bands like to bill themselves as "inept", but then you hear their tape (bandcamp/8 track/cloud shitter) and they seem to keep it together. It seems like they know how to play real chords. Maybe their drummer can clumsily make their way through a basic time signature for the entirety of a 45 second song. Maybe their drummer even has a drum set!! Alabama's JOKE is clearly inept. and can barely cover any of these bases and that is why I love them. They didn't even know how to play the right chords to their cover of FANG's "The Money Will Roll Right In". Hell, they didn't even know how to approach RORSHACH's "Clenching" (much less spell their name right), so they just made up their own music and sang RORSHACH's lyrics over it. Their original songs are an utter train wreck. Don't have a drum set? Take an old person's walker, duct tape some cowbells and metal to it and hit it with a stick. Don't know how to record your band? Get a cassette at K Mart or tape over your grandpa's sermon on a broken boombox. Play anywhere. Don't follow the script.
     JOKE split their time between Madison and Huntsville, AL in 1993. They consisted of Freud Reia on guitar/vocals and Joey Tampon on drums/vocals. They lasted long enough but not that long. That's about all I know. Joey went on to play in THE SLACKERS, JOEY TAMPON AND THE TOXIC SHOCKS, THE 3D'S, THE RADIOACTIVES and more. Freud later played in THE PERFECT HUMAN EXAMPLE and THE CRIMINALS.

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Their very own Discogs page

Thanks to Jack Saturn for holding onto this tape, digitizing it and sending it over.

RIP Freud Reia

MIX TAPE - 1995

  Besides my old friend, Heather, who I met when I was 5 years old, I only keep in touch with one other friend from the Nascar days of my youth (that reference is so vague that I'm not explaining it...just roll with it). That friend is Angie, who mailed this tape to me at my two room apartment in Huntsville, AL in 1995. No cover, no track listing...just this tape rolled up into a letter, recorded over a battered GEORGE MICHAEL cassingle. Short and to the point. I had no clue that I'd still love every song on this tape 20 years later (20 years!). I had no clue that the Floyd who is mentioned in the first line of the first song would be the same person who now assigns me CD's to review for Maximum Rock N Roll or that that house he made his phone call from (listen to the song) would catch on fire a short distance from where I live now. I didn't know that the third song would still resonate so much harder with me now than it did back then. The last band on the tape, EVERY ALICE ON EARTH, will not be a hit with many (or any) visitors to the blog, but they were a local(ish) band where I grew up and were one the first DIY (I mean this as actual "Do It Yourself", not as an empty slogan used by hardware stores and Pottery Barn) bands I ever saw in my pre-teen years, which made a big impact. In some very, very tiny circles, they are legendary.

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RADIOACTIVES - Tape - 1997

   When I was 18, I played drums in a band called JOEY TAMPON AND THE TOXIC SHOCKS with my friends Joey and Neil. We played for a couple of years, put out some recordings and went on some tours. It was fun. One day, we were practicing in my bedroom and Joey said something to the effect of "I'm bored with this and I don't feel like I have anything relevant to sing about anymore." The band broke up on the spot, but within a week, Joey and I were already practicing with a new band in my room. We asked two sisters named Rachel and Heather to join us playing surf music. I spent most of my teenage years devouring all forms of garage punk and surf but had recently turned my full attention to classic punk and hardcore. The other three members of the band lived and breathed surf music 24/7....or maybe like 23/6.
   Long story short, I wasn't having fun playing surf music and it seemed like the others were really, really into it. I stuck around long enough to play a benefit show (I forget what it was for) and record this tape, but then went on my way. My friend Ben replaced me. He was also playing in RICE HARVESTER at the time and now plays in PINE HILL HAINTS.
   I think the band had plans to record an LP, but that never materialized. Actually, I don't even think they lasted too much longer after Ben joined the band. This tape was recorded on a reel-to-reel four track in the back room of my house on the corner of Dement and Ward* in north Huntsville, AL. Most of it was the first take.

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*When we found the house at Dement and Ward near Five Points in Huntsville, my roommate Elijah and I wanted to move in just because it was on that corner. The house was a shithole. 

HIGHLANDS - "Rear Entry Recordings" - Tape - 2000

   This tape is a companion piece to the DICK VAN DYKES post from yesterday because it was recorded on the same day in the same place with most of the same people. THE HIGHLANDS was our friend, Ryan's home recording project where he played short, fast, catchy songs that rarely, if ever, lasted over 45 seconds. He would include tapes of these recordings with his zine, 5 Minutes of Your Time. We (D.V.D.) encouraged Ryan to play shows with a live band, even though his set would last 5 minutes or less. When we recorded the D.V.D. songs, we got Ryan to play some of his songs with Chrissie and I accompanying him on bass and drums, respectively. It's a little rough, but I like the songs a lot. We even got him to record his epic two-and-a-half minute super pop jam, "Changes Pt 3", which has Bob playing drums and me on bass. If I can track down the original home recordings, I will post those one day, even though you have to turn those up all the way just to hear it.

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7 songs. About 7 minutes of your time. 

DICK VAN DYKES - "Rear Entry Recordings" - Tape - 2000

   THE DICK VAN DYKES started abruptly in the north Alabama bedroom of a teenage boy who went by the name of Bob. Bob started showing up at punk shows when he was nine years old, sporting a 3 foot mohawk and a dress shirt that had the names of punk bands scrawled all over it in Sharpie. Bob was kind of a jerk then, but we all wanted to be his friend and soon, we were.
   By the time this band formed, Bob was 14 or 15. The other members were Blair Menace and myself. We were both in our 20's and being around Bob made us feel ancient. We just formed a band on the spot and wrote all the songs in about 5 minutes, with subjects ranging from receiving postcards about tackling cacti n the desert to the band BLACK DICE to the comedy duo of Don Knotts and Tim Conway. It was bad. We recorded it and went our separate ways.
  Later, I kinda lost my shit and moved away from Chattanooga and into Bob's mom's windowless basement in Huntsville, AL. Our good friend, Chrissie had also kinda lost her shit and moved home to her dad's place in Pulaski, Tennessee, 45 miles away. One night, I drank too much coffee and lost my shit a little more and decided to walk to Pulaski to hang out with Chrissie. When I got there, 8 hours later, my feet were bleeding and I didn't make any sense. Soon, we were both back in Huntsville and Chrissie was in our newly revived band. We decided to spend a little longer writing the songs this time and were happier with the results. Bob was (and still is) the fastest drummer I've ever played with, which was awesome because I only want to play hardcore if it sounds out of control. Oh yeah, we were a hardcore band once Chrissie joined us and began talking about AUS ROTTEN and DS-13. She played bass and sang, I played guitar and tried to yell.

   We never thought we'd play outside of Bob's basement, but we did eventually. We even went on a very short, ill-advised tour in a primer grey, early 80's clunker car that was bought at a police auction. At one of the shows, someone who lived at the house decided that they didn't want a show there, so they locked all the doors and left. The promoter simply broke in and had the show anyway. We recorded this tape back in Chattanooga at Rear Entry (a practice space in the Highland Park neighborhood) with our friend, Ryan. It was recorded live on 2 tracks, mostly in one take and very sloppily. Some songs are good. Some are bad. You can decide which is which. I will point out that our cover of the HIGHLANDS "Changes Pt 1" is just awful. If you don't know who the HIGHLANDS are (and I'm betting that you don't), please check back tomorrow.

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Photo above is by Brontez, live in Huntsville, AL at Stokes St Warehouse. We really were not trying to pose for this pic. It just happened. 

Top drawing by Janelle Hessig

Cellphone hatred pic by Chrissie.

REMOTE OUTPOSTS WEIRDO MIX VOL 2 - Tape - 2013

   This is the second in a collection of songs and random bullshit that doesn't really fit elsewhere. I make no excuses or apologies for sound fidelity. You can find the first installment of this collection right here..
    The intro is the beginning of one of the worst songs of all time. Unfortunately, it got stuck in the heads of Cinque and I when we were working on a farm, picking basil for a few weeks. We would scream out the lyrics to each other across the field at 7 am. One day, I went into town and was looking at the 45 at the record store when the clerk said, "Oh God, please take that record! Just get it out of the store."
  The second is a lost RICE HARVESTER song that never made it onto any releases or into a recording studio. By this time, I had moved from Huntsville back to Birmingham, AL, but was still driving back to Huntsville (around a 3 hour drive, round trip) once a week to practice. I think we intended for this song to be on a compilation of Alabama bands that never got off the ground. It's about a homeless man in Huntsville named Gene who, rather than simply sleeping under overpasses, would build a little shack / house under the bridge in plain view of everyone. I immediately felt weird about writing this song because after talking to him a few times and being only 20 years old, I really had no grasp of the complexities of homelessness and mental illness. It's written from a place of privilege that just embarrasses me now. Luckily, the recording quality is abysmal.
   It's followed up by one of my favorite EFS songs. They were the house band at a punk house that was allegedly above the Black & White Liquors by Ashby BART in the East Bay way back in the dark ages. Following that is a band containing members who have won Grammys and shit. I'm not saying their name because I want to avoid the fiasco of being linked to slobbering fan site messageboards (again). If you listen to melodic punk, you will probably recognize this song, but maybe not this version. Sound quality is total trash. CBDS is after them with a different mix of one of their great songs. Sound quality has deteriorated so badly that you will wonder if there has been a turd stuffed into the cassette.
    Quality takes a step up for the intro to the long lost Alabama rock band, BUCKET FULL OF HERESY. The intro is the best part of their tape. The rest is an endurance test of having to listen to teenagers try to write a song while the tape is rolling. I know that this hasn't stopped me in the past, but I'll spare you the gory details this time. SMEGMAGICIANS are next. They've been a band since 1993, but only played one show in 1994. They're mysterious and choose to stay that way. This song was recorded in 1999.
   Next up is a recording from a FORCED VENGEANCE show that took place on my birthday back in 2000 (?). Details are hazy, but I do know that Harry (guitarist) and I played this show nearly blacked out drunk. This show was also when the proverbial line in the sand was drawn between the towns of Bloomington and Chattanooga because a bunch of Bloomington residents came down to this show and decided that we were some of the worst people to ever exist because my friend Piper (who lived in Bloomington most of the time, mind you) decided to construct a 3 foot long, paper mache cock to hang from the ceiling. I'm sure I'm missing some details here, but instead of talking to us and figuring out that we were not the worst people ever, a lot of folks just decided to go with that story....some of the debris of this show still lingers around to this day (obviously). ANYWAY, This recording comes from the beginning of the set when Harry needed to borrow an amp because his was crapping out. Rather than just wait around for this to happen, Eric (other guitar) and I (drums) started fucking around. Harry, who is usually fairly quiet and shy, took this opportunity to bust out a ridiculous, entirely ad-libbed 80's style rap. When Chrissie (bass) joins in, the whole thing gels together in this way that none of us expected, I'm pretty sure we were all laughing so hard that we cried. I know that I did when re-listening to it. I vaguely remember the audience laughing and dancing.
   Now, we do a 180 and switch gears entirely. DOOMSDAY CAULDRON is the best thing on here. I was never a huge follower of their music, but got a few things passed on to me through mix tapes that blew my mind in different ways. Coming from the background that I do, their songs initially sounded overbearing and unnecessarily serious to me, but as they grew on me, I knew that they meant every word with every fiber of their being. Their song "Song for Sera" is one of my favorites to listen to in the middle of the night on long drives in the middle of nowhere. Coupled with their song "Darkness Is Falling" and THE BODY's "Just Wretched", you can almost perfectly picture the world in the moments just before it explodes and destroys every last bit of life on this planet.
   To close out the tape, I switched gears again and went back to ridiculous. If you grew up in the 80's, you may remember those weird answering machine greeting tape commercials....They advertised tapes that you could buy for your answering machine that sang ultra corny greetings to the tune of Beethoven's Fifth and bad 50's rock. Here's a whole tape of them (2 and a half whole minutes) so that you can confuse people who call your cell now...if anyone ever calls you anymore.

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RANDOM CONFLICT - "Defying the Megadread" - Tape - 1988

   If you've lived in Alabama (or the southeast) in the last 25 years, you've undoubtedly heard of RANDOM CONFLICT. Bill Reeves has been fronting these guys since they first stormed into the armories and shitty bars of northern Alabama, playing hardcore, crossover, and straight-up punk the whole time. They played their first show on August 12, 1988 (that's 25 years ago TODAY) at the Dance Not Destroy fest in Nashville, TN. They suffered through multiple line-up changes throughout the late 80's and early 90's before abandoning their crossover/metal roots and calling it quits.
   They reformed in the 90's with Brian on bass (and he's still with them to this day) and DJ on drums (anonymous reports say he is now in jail). I put them on a lot of shows that I set up throughout the late 90's with BLACK FORK, SHITBOY FROM OUTERSPACE and others. At this point, they vehemently denied that they were ever a metal/crossover band, even though you could still buy their 1991 EP for proof at the local record store. (funny/not funny side story: Sunburst, the record store in Huntsville, always had copies of their first 7" on the shelves and the owner, Jay would complain that no one was buying them. One day, the record store burned down and it sucked, obviously. Still, Jay rebuilt and re-opened. On the first day, I walked in and donated a bunch of records to the store. I said "Hey Jay, look on the bright side. At least those Random Conflict records are finally gone." It was the first time I saw him smile in a while.)
  I moved away from Alabama and RANDOM CONFLICT kept moving forward. The last time I saw them, they were playing a coffeeshop right by my house in Chattanooga in 2001 (there were no flyers. I just happened to see Bill in the parking lot.). They played an excellent set to almost no one. I told Bill I would happily set up a show for them at our all ages punk space where they could play to a room full of appreciative people. Bill said that they didn't believe in cliques or scenes. I asked if they believed in playing shows to people who wanted to see them but Bill maintained that they didn't need any help. So, I never did set up that show for them. A couple of years ago, I stumbled into a show just as Bill yelled "We're RANDOM CONFLICT! Thank you and good fuckin' night!" I turned around and walked right back out the door. They were the only reason I even showed up.
   25 years is a long fuckin time to be in a band, especially on an independent level, but RANDOM CONFLICT is still chugging along. They even put out a new LP that is, in my opinion, one of the best things they've ever put out (along with that first demo). I put the record on, expecting it to be a rehash of their earlier material, but it was all new and fresh. (You can order it from No Profit). If these guys keep moving in the direction that they're going, then I'm really looking forward to the next 25 years. Keep it up!!

DOWNLOAD RANDOM CONFLICT's 1st Tape

Download complete recordings 1988-1992

"Help Me, I'm Trapped in a Ford Festiva" - Compilation - Tape - 1997

    I grew up in a tiny town in the middle of Alabama and discovered punk when I was in 6th grade through a tape of the MINUTEMEN's "Double Nickels on the Dime." Over the years, I tried to start bands with people who either really didn't want to be in a punk band or just had drastically different ideas of what a punk band was. The day after I graduated high school, I moved 108 miles away to a different small town called Huntsville. I lived in my car for those first couple of months and came to discover a whole new world of punk where people were actually playing the loud, fucked up, vibrant music that I wanted to be playing at that time in my life. It was perfect for me. I met people who put out their own records and set up their own shows in houses, parking lots and thrift stores. It was inspiring, to say the least. Within just a few months, I was playing in my own band and going on tour all over the southeast, making friends that I still have to this day. At the time, I wanted to make a compilation tape to show what was going on in my town (and where it had come from) so that other people would know how awesome it was, but honestly, I don't know if this tape ever reached people outside of Alabama.
   The comp starts off with RICE HARVESTER and THE CACA WOMEN FROM URANUS. I've already written about them, so you can click those links above if you're curious. Next up is THE REFILLS, who were a short lived band from the area that consisted of Neil (from JOEY TAMPON AND THE TOXIC SHOCKS and 565 BURNOUTS), Ben (from RICE HARVESTER, SUCKERPUNCH and now in PINE HILL HAINTS) and Bill Conflict (who did and still plays in RANDOM CONFLICT). They played fucking tough, straight ahead punk that was informed by THE FREEZE and D.O.A. I loved them when they were around and their song "Bleed" on this tape still holds up today.

RICE HARVESTER on the 4th of July, 1998. San Pedro, CA.

   Next on the tape is AOA, which was originally a home recording project by my friends Blair and Ramesh. They would get together and record hours of MEN'S RECOVERY PROJECT (and FAT DAY) inspired noise and weirdness at their houses. After a while, they would come over and kind of force me to play anything in their band, like a drum on a bed or some cans. They had tapes and tapes of this stuff (one of which got stuck in my car stereo for months so that it was the only thing I could ever listen to. When I finally removed it, it destroyed the tape and the stereo...a week or so later, the brakes failed at 3 am and I almost totaled a cop car, but that's a different story altogether.) On this recording, we sorta became a kinda normal punk band for a second. I think I played drums, but I also think I played guitar sometimes. Ramesh played bass and sang. Blair sang and played the keyboard maybe. I think a guy named Pube switched up instruments with me. It was a weird time, but I still like "Black Flag is Boring" and the theme song.

AOA in my room. 1996.

   SHITHEAD JONES is a fukkin punk band and you can read all about their saga here. After that is THE GRUMPIES, who weren't technically an Alabama band, but they played there so often that  one might think that they lived there. All of their songs on here (minus one) were later re-recorded for their LP on Recess Records. These early versions are pretty great and it also includes a ripping cover of "Kiss Me Deadly" by Lita Ford.  You can find their demo and other stuff here.

THE GRUMPIES playing in a storefront in Florence, AL.

  GARY COLEMAN BAND were just Blair and Ramesh from AOA playing really minimal stuff. This song was recorded in a porn shop in N Huntsville and is honestly one of my favorite things ever put on tape. The side ends with THE SMEGMAGICIANS, which is my high school punk band that I restarted just to finish out this side of the tape. It sucks. The first song is an AOA cover. I played guitar and sang while my friend Harry played drums. I wouldn't let him hear the song or practice it before recording. The second song is just me playing guitar and drums...and actually it's not too bad.
  Side 2 kicks off with a live set from SHITBOY FROM OUTERSPACE, a band I have already covered here (it's the same set too). They are followed up by the always great 565 BURNOUTS, who have their own entry right here.

A later incarnation of 565 BURNOUTS playing at American Beat Records in Birmingham, AL.

   JOEY TAMPON AND THE TOXIC SHOCKS are up next, playing three songs that I'm pretty sure never appeared on other recordings. Well, two of the songs were definitely on a record, but not these recordings. The first song was never released on anything and it's not that good (but I'm biased...I was in the band). I have no clue where or why we recorded these songs. It could have been recorded in my bedroom or in a "real" studio. No idea. You can find more by the band here.

JOEY TAMPON AND THE TOXIC SHOCKS playing an 8 year old's birthday party in St Mary's, GA. Note that Neil is smoking.

   Joey and Neil from the TOXIC SHOCKS were also in CHEESE ASS CHRIST. They weren't from Alabama. They were from Georgia. You can find possibly everything you ever wanted to know about them here. 

   One of Alabama's first hardcore bands (possibly the very first) was THE KNOCKABOUTS, who come up next on this tape. Their songs on here come from their demo tape-turned -EP from 1982. (well, the demo is from '82. The EP is from '95). You can find more info about them here. The only thing I want to add is that I talked to Ken (owner of Prank Records who released their EP) about them and he said that he might release an LP collection in the future. I guess there's a lot more songs laying around. He's obviously not in a big hurry, but I would be excited if that project ever saw the light of day, Fun fact: The title of this comp ("Help Me, I'm Trapped in a Ford Festiva") comes from THE KNOCKABOUTS. My band (JT and the TOXIC SHOCKS) used to go on tour in my Ford Festiva (with all of our equipment, yes), which is one of the tiniest cars you could possibly own in the 90's. We listened to THE KNOCKABOUTS a lot. When we would listen to their song "Fast Pulse" (included here), we would sing that line instead of the KNOCKABOUTS-penned line of "Help me, I'm trapped in a human body!!"

   MENACE (not really sure if they ever realized there was a classic punk band called MENACE) was a band of teenage punk kids from the burbs who could barely hold it together, but held it together just enough to belt out this rough recording on a boom box. I think I only saw them once and that was only because I drove out to one of their mom's houses in south Huntsville for a band practice. I could be wrong though because I think I have a flyer for them somewhere. One weird thing about this band is that my friend Ramesh sang for them and did not play an instrument, which is ridiculous because he was already becoming a good bass player at that point. Still, you can listen to their song "AUO994" and realize why they got him to sing. 

   THE MACK was somewhat the black sheep of the Huntsville punk family. I believe 50% of that was self-imposed and the other 50 was just punk kids not wanting to admit that they liked pop-punk at some point in their lives. Either way, THE MACK played undeniably tuneful and upbeat pop-punk that was not very popular among the local scene, but I'll bet that they would have been a hit if they had ever managed to go on a tour or two in the mid-90's. Now, you can download this and relive your secret (or not-so-secret) pop-punk past. I will admit now that these songs are good. (Fun facts: THE MACK was the only local band of this era to have an online presence at the time. They are also the only band I've ever "auditioned" for as a drummer...for which I was denied for not being good enough.)

  I'm not talking about the next band. Fuck it. They were from Florida. I was the only one who knew who they were. The first song made me want to learn to play drums. The second song sucks ass.
   15E was an insane sounding punk band that worked as a precursor to THE SLACKERS, SHITBOY FROM OUTERSPACE and most of the crop of 90's punk from Huntsville. The members were Jason (SHITBOY and later XPIA), Joey (JOEY TAMPON, THE SLACKERS, RADIOACTIVES, 3D's, many more and later a born again Baptist preacher), and Mike (SEWER PUNKS and others that flew off my radar). They named the band after the apartment number of the place they shared. This recording comes from a live set at the Tip Top in north Huntsville where the band constantly harangues the audience for being shitty people. Punk. This is all I know about them. They were before my time in that town. If anyone has their demo tape, I will gladly take it.
   The tape ends with local greats THE SLACKERS and THE JAWAS. Everything you might ever want to know about both of those bands can be found here and here. The closing sample is possibly one of the best samples ever committed to tape, in my opinion.

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Re-uploaded 2013

P.S. There's 65 tracks total in this download.
This one's for Ramesh, who was always a fan and supporter of Alabama punk bands.

Now, here's some flyers from that era.

I think this is one of the first punk flyers I ever made, with help from Jason Shitboy. We used to have illegal shows at the Jaycee's Fairgrounds, which was just a gazebo in a parking lot. Sometimes, we paid $100 to use the space. Other times, we just went in and had the show without permission. I think this was one of the illegal times. THE DUMBSHITZ was my old band from Birmingham that I had quit by this point. They didn't show up for this show. Here's a video of them playing in Birmingham after I quit.

This was my birthday show, also at the fairgrounds. PROPERTY was a mainstay of the Huntsville punk scene and I'm confused as to why they're not on the tape. THEE AUTOBOTS was a later band spearheaded by Jack THE MACK that incorporated sax into the pop-punk world.

Great show for $3. Gorin's was an ice cream shop downtown that was dumb enough to let us have punk shows. 

All local bands at Gorin's Flyer by Blair Menace. BLOODY HOLLY was mostly improv-violence. Blair, Jay Kaos and I wore bloody dress shirts and glasses while assaulting people, sonically. I can't even begin to explain the CATATONICS to you. If I can ever dig up their tape (doubtful), it will have its own thing on here.

Another local show at Gorin's. THE SHIZNICS never recorded and I don't remember much about them. THE PANIC BUTTONS should have been on the comp but never got any music to me. They will be featured on the blog one day. Those guys went on to play in THOMAS FUNCTION.

RICE HARVESTER's 1st show. One of the TOXIC SHOCKS' last. PINK COLLAR JOBS were one of the best bands from the southeast in the 90's.

Local times, minus THE GRUMPIES, who might as well have been local. Art by Marsh. Flyer by me.

SUCKERPUNCH - Unreleased LP - 2001

   Back when I posted SUCKERPUNCH's demo tape, I was under the impression that they never recorded anything else. I've always loved that tape and wished they had more music out in the world that I could listen to. Fast-forward life to spring of 2012: RAG RAGE from Chattanooga came out to the Bay Area and their bass player, Chad gave me this CD-R of a full, unreleased SUCKERPUNCH album. Apparently, SP's drummer, Ben had passed it along to Chad to give to someone else, but Chad thoughtfully made a copy for me as well.
   On this recording, the band continually sounds like they are in a tug of war between post-punk and hardcore as filtered through southern living. Hardcore usually seems to win the competition, which is fine by me. There are flashes of 7 SECONDS, REAGAN YOUTH and TEEN IDLES here and there, but for the most part, SUCKERPUNCH's sound is their own. I think this whole album is great, but around the 12th song, it becomes unstoppable. Sixteen songs in all. No song titles listed. Fuckin' do it!

Download SUCKERPUNCH

SHITHEAD JONES - Tape - 1997

SHITHEAD JONES was a teenage punk band from the bowels of Huntsville,AL who were known by very few during their brief existence. Like many teenage punk bands in Alabama, they probably started because this group of friends was bored and there were some instruments sitting around. Ramesh played the bass, Kevin sang, Jay Kaos played the guitar and Ryan (who had the unfortunate nickname "Pube") banged on the drums.  I saw them play shows at Gorin's Ice Cream in downtown Huntsville numerous times, playing to almost no one. Even though it seemed frustrating to the band that no one really wanted to watch them, they played with an energetic determination that I found inspiring. 

     I read once that BLACK FLAG showed up to a show in the middle of nowhere and hardly anyone came to see them. Henry Rollins started complaining about how he didn't want to load their equipment out to play to a handful of people. Chuck Dukowski said that they had to. They had to load out and play their hearts out whether it's 5 people or 500 because that's what they do. They give their all in every performance no matter what. SHITHEAD JONES never had the option of playing to 500 people...maybe not even 50. Still, they played their hearts out to empty rooms and I sometimes think of them to this day when my band is playing a less than stellar show on tour. 

   This download contains everything I know of by the band in all of its falling-apart, ramshackle glory. The first 5 songs are from a random tape they made at home (turn it up fukkin' loud...bad quality) and it is followed by an "interview", where their bass player, Ramesh talks to the singer, Kevin at a show in Huntsville. The last two songs are from a recording "sesh" in Harvest, AL when I asked the band to record some songs for a tape comp that I was releasing. All of the sound quality is pretty awful, but this is what happens when you get 4 broke punk kids together who want to spend absolutely nothing on their band. I love it.

   This is the hard part that I don't wanna write...because I'm sick of writing about dead friends...because it exhausts me to think about all of the things that I (and we) could have done as a community to keep an old friend on this earth a little bit longer. It's too late though. Ramesh Narayanan took his own life a little over a week ago in Chattanooga, TN and it breaks my heart. I met him at a show at the Tip-Top (a bar in Huntsville that let kids in for some reason) back in 1993 (I think) when he was hanging out with his friend, Blair, who I also met that night. I soon realized that being friends with Ramesh meant it was a package deal and I would also spend the same amount of time hanging out with Blair. It was fine with me since they were both fun to be around, usually had good ideas and had excellent musical tastes. There was absolutely nothing to do in Huntsville, so sometimes they would pick me up in Blair's car and we would just drive around town listening to RANCID. I felt like I was part of some weird, secret special pact when they invited me to be in their home recording project, A.O.A. I appreciated it when they would come over to drag me out of my house and go do anything. They were fun to be around.

   Like many teenage friendships, people tend to move away and start doing their own thing. I moved away and started touring a lot. Blair moved to Asheville and did the same. I soon ended up in Chattanooga, sharing a living room as a bedroom with Ramesh. Our relationship became complicated and difficult at times, but he still remained close and one of my oldest friends. Over the years, our paths crossed a lot. I moved a lot and he did too, but we kept in touch where we could. We even started another band together in the early '00's, but we were so scatterbrained that we couldn't even keep it together long enough to play one show. 

   I started trying to reach out a little more to him when I heard that he had moved back to his mom's house to take care of her, but I could never get much information out of him. I couldn't tell if he was embarrassed to move back home or if he was just to busy to talk about it or just thought it was a non-issue. We only corresponded through the internet for the last few years and when I ever returned to visit Chattanooga, the lack of his presence was always felt. When I heard that he was gone, I didn't want to believe it. I still don't. I didn't want to believe that he could feel so alone with such a large community of friends at his disposal, although I know that feeling as well. I don't know what was going on, Ramesh, but I do want you to know that I miss you. I love you. You made a huge impact in my life in a lot of different ways and I wish you would have known how many lives you have altered in this world. Since his passing, a lot of people have gotten in touch...people that I didn't expect and I forget that he knew so many folks: artists, freaks, parents, norms, queers, a rock star who shared the stage with The Boss, gutter punks and more. What can we do to reach out when our friends are in trouble? How can we offer a hand when we feel so far away? I know that I'm going to try harder to let my friends know that I care about them and try to be there when they need me, but what can we all do? It's impossible to always know what is going on in someone's head. I just feel so lost.

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Link updated Feb 2017

With this entry, this blog has been viewed over 100,000 times. Thanks for reading and paying attention to my ramblings as well as listening to all of these crazy recordings that I have. I appreciate it. 

THRASH - "Total Anarchy" - Tape - 1990

   Since the beginning of this blog, I've been dusting off many tapes from my shelves and digitizing piles upon piles of forgotten music from over the years. I love many of the things I've posted on here, but I understand that some of this stuff might be embarrassing for some of the people who played the music on those tapes. I can almost hear them thinking, "Thanks for digitizing that band that I was in for 5 seconds who put out that one awful tape that sounds like shit. Big contribution to the world of punk there. Where's your stupid, embarrassing bullshit tape?" Well, here I am to level the playing field.

    I grew up in a town called Pleasant Grove, which is only notable for being completely wiped out by a tornado last year (to be clear, I'm not meaning to be flippant about it. If you can offer any help or support, that would be great, As Hurricane Katrina and this tornado has proven, the US does not care too much about poor southern people). My parents and I split the cost of a drumset ($100) when I was 12 and we bought it from my cousin, who played in a DEF LEPPARD lip sync band...meaning that they were not a cover band, but were a band who dressed up like DEF LEPPARD and acted like they were playing their songs while dancing to pre-recorded music....like karaoke with too much planning. Anyhow, I got the drums and just hit them haphazardly in my basement for months on end. I did not understand how to make a beat at all. My favorite bands at the time were THE CURE, METALLICA, VIOLENT FEMMES and DREAD ZEPPELIN but I didn't know how to make a drum set sound like any of those things.
   I tried to start a band called WASTED YOUTH (I know...name was already taken) with my friends in 6th grade, but it never got further than coming up with that badass name. Later, we started D.O.P.E., which stood for DEATH OF PREPS EVERYWHERE, but I'm not sure if we ever recorded anything or learned how to play a real chord. Then, at the ripe age of 13, my friends and I decided to start a "thrash band" called THRASH. It was gonna be the raddest band ever. We were going to play at our school and fucking kill people. We were gonna have the coolest songs with lightning fast tempos...if we could only figure out what you had to do to actually write a song. It seemed really hard and confusing.
   Ward played bass and sang. Mike played guitar and also sang. I played the drums. Those two guys were a few of the only people in my school who even came close to resembling punks. We set up my boombox in the basement of my parents house and unleashed song after fucking song of unbridled teenage brutality. We were completely untouchable and at the top of our game. I pressed "play" on the boombox to listen to what we had done and....what the fuck? What was this dumb shit that we burdened the world with? Mozart was 5 years old when he composed his own music and performed it in front of European royalty. One of the guys from OLD SKULL was 9 when they put out an LP on Restless Records. We were teenagers and we couldn't even write a legible song with a chorus or even any noticeable "parts". Basically, we sucked....bad. I was embarrassed of our band before the tape was even finished.
   Opening up with the now-classic (to someone somewhere...maybe just me) "Suck My Dick You Fucking Prick" (gimme a break. we were 13), it sets the tone for the rest of the tape. It's amazing how fucked up some of this sounds. It reminds me of shit that noise artists are striving for. One perfect example of that is "Bad Taste". It's no wonder that I quit within a couple of months and started a noise band that only played on the streets. I dare you to download this and listen to it all the way through. Lucky for you, I cut out over half of the tape because I still have some shreds of self-respect buried somewhere deep within me.
   After this tape came out, I quit THRASH. They soldiered on without me. Mike moved to drums.  They got our friend, Andy to sing and found some hot-shit stoner guitarist named Josh to round out the lineup. The four of them delved into the devil's weed and actually tried (unsuccessfully) to write real songs (sell-outs). I appeared briefly on their second tape, aptly titled "Weed", but my days with the band were done. They were trying to be serious and I wanted no part of that
   Lo and behold, THRASH did play at our high school, but did not end up killing anyone...or even giving a wedgie to the principal. I think they got in trouble for saying "fuck" a lot. I'm not sure. My joke band, THE SMEGMAGICIANS opened up for them and we were too busy changing out of our bathrobes, boots and fencing masks to notice....but that's a story for another day.

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JARVIS - 2nd Demo - Tape - 1999

   Remember last October when I talked about how my favorite JARVIS tape was the one with the worst sound quality (no, I don't expect you to remember that, but here is the link to it)? Well, here is that tape. There is something buried beneath the shitty sound quality and the wild mix that makes me believe (in some crevasse of my brain) that this is the very best thing that this band ever did. Many will disagree with me and that's fine, but i have listened to this recording at least one billion times. I fucking love it.
   I'll just go ahead and tell you that I'm not gonna talk specifics about the band much at all because I already did that in the link above and here..
    This tape contains my favorite version of (well, everything) "I Wanna Go" and I think the band is totally "feelin' it" super hard on this recording. On "Changes", you may think "Hey, when did a woman join this band?", but that's just Ryan doing both vocal tracks. It kinda blows my mind still. "Self Effacement" never appeared on anything else and wasn't played live too much, but it's one of my all-time favorites. If you wanna see me get overly fuckin' nerdy about a poorly recorded demo tape that only a handful of people might care about, check this shit out: About 10 seconds into "Changes Pt 2", it sounds like Bob (the drummer) fucks up by trying to change tempos for a split second. He didn't fuck up. (Bear with me here for a moment) There is a really early POTENTIAL JOHNS song that has the exact same fuck up in it (a real one, I assume) and Bob was emulating that exact same flub but doing it intentionally in his own bands' song. What the fuck? At the time, I thought it was genius. Okay, I still do.
   Whatever....you might hate this and the sound quality. I don't care. Some people listen to Fifteen Counts of Arson. Others listen to In On The Kill Taker. I don't. I listen to this tape.

Download JARVIS
Updated June 2015

TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES FROM DAY ONE - Tape - 1997

   Iggy Scam put out this tape in 1997 and it brought to life a ton of bands that I had only read about (mostly in SCAM, the zine) or heard about by word of mouth. It was a revelation to hear real, live songs by bands with names like DARVIS BROWN AND THE SMOKE ASSES, VANBUILDERASS, LES TURDZ, and KREAMY LECTRIC SANTA. It was more than that. It was fucking exciting and it changed my life. It helped to open up my life to a whole world of complete and utter badasses who mostly have remained that way through the years. This is where I first heard "Revolution Sound" by THE STUN GUNS, where I first heard THE DRILLER KILLERS (who inspired me to make my own shirt with a Sharpie), where I was introduced to the genius of "Can't Take It Away" by THE MORONS and so, so much more. "Stupid Fresh" by KLS still sends chills down my spine every time I hear it. This is also where I first heard THE FUNYONS, a band powered mostly by one man named Steve who plays his simple-yet-insanely-catchy songs only on the streets, which I've always respected immensely. You may also know Steve as the principal songwriter behind ONION FLAVORED RINGS, who have been also churning out quality pop-punk for 10 years, even though they have slowed down in recent years. The cool thing is that Steve still plays FUNYONS songs unannounced on the streets of San Francisco all the time.
   This tape proclaimed "30 bands! 51 songs from The Region!" and that term (the region) has stuck around for all these years and has evolved into "region rock". But what the fuck is "region rock" and why should you care? I can't answer the latter, but I can tell you that the term "The Region" was coined by Cinque Adams. It  is loosely defined as an area in the southeastern US that is shaped like a triangle with points in Dogtown, AR, Tom Foote;s house in Chattanooga, TN and the ruins of an old hotel called "The Mutiny" in Coconut Grove in Miami. Bands from The Region mostly shared (and continue to share) ideologies, band members and much more. I don't want to define it too much because it's not mine to define. It's ever-shifting and belongs to the punks of the southeast. Don't think about it too much. Just close your mind.
   The songs were compiled by Iggy using (I'm sure) the cheapest of equipment and the barest of essentials. The same could be said for many of the bands recording their songs. The music was dubbed onto tapes stolen from chain stores and distributed through the US by touring bands, traveling kids, punk post, and a couple of small distributors. I remember getting 10 of these in the mail from Iggy and they were all snatched up by the punks in my town within a couple of hours. I don't even have a copy of this anymore.

   I did a sequel to this comp three years later, which you can find right here. This comp was originally posted on Region Rock and More, (so you can ask him why all the songs are weirdly numbered and out of order) but is no longer available there since Megaupload was shut down by the feds. I wanted to keep it around and easy to access, in case people want to hear it. It's an important document in the history of southeastern punk rock. This is for Forrest Haye, Andrew Ross Powell, Chris Cottie, Brian Turd, Victor Wiley, Mike O'Brien and any other winners we've lost along the way.

DOWNLOAD///Updated July 2013

 





THE SLACKERS - Tape - 1994

   Remember back in the day, about 13 hours ago, when I posted that SLACKERS discography and said something like "Well, it's not a real discography because they put out a tape that I don't have."? Blair Menace, a Huntsville native and lifetime punk, quickly sent over this rip of their tape. NOW, you have their entire discography. This tape is warbly and fucked from years of hard living (plus, it was probably not in the best state in its original form), but it still punk as fuck and awesome.

  Download SLACKERS Tape.
Link updated 4/6/15. RIP Heiko)

THE SLACKERS - Discography - 1993-1995

   I bought a drum set from my cousin for $100 in 1988 when I was 12 years old. I didn't know how to play it, but I banged on it every day and tried to come up with something that remotely resembled anything that I had ever heard in my life. Most of the time, it was fruitless and sounded like a 12 year old banging on some trash. I had read articles in magazines about how when THE RAMONES came along, punks around the world were inspired to pick up guitars and start their own bands because all you needed was 3 chords and a steady beat. The articles would talk about how laughably simple their songs were. When I listened to THE RAMONES, I heard untouchable genius that could not be replicated. Sure, I could sorta play "Bltzkrieg Bop" on guitar (I even taught my dad when I was 13. He had never touched a guitar in his life), but that fucking machine-like beat that Tommy Ramone was playing was impossible for me. I would play the drums for hours and not even come close to sounding anything like it. I constantly felt like a failure at music, but soldiered on, playing in teenage punk bands that never amounted to much. I had this idea that your band had to sound perfect and you had to be on a record label to ever put anything out. My bands would make tapes in editions of 3-25 because we didn't know what else to do.
    As time moved on, I heard bands like BEAT HAPPENING, RAOOUL and SKINNED TEEN, who helped me to realize that you don't have to be a pro musician to play music and put out records. But the biggest influence to me at that time, who helped illuminate a path to a greater understanding of DIY, was THE SLACKERS. They lived two hours north of me in Huntsville, AL and they were punk as fuck. The punks in my town had some cool bands (like HEAVENLY BANGING CANNON, WAFFLE HOUSE RIOTERS, and THE SPASTARDS), but THE SLACKERS were actually putting out records, touring, setting up shows and living their punk lives 24 hours a day. When I heard their first 7", "Where Were You in 92?", I laughed because it was so ramshackle and amateur, but also catchy and punk. Even I could play drums as good as their drummer (I found out later that even though Matt set up a bass drum in front of him, he didn't use it). I knew that I had to see these guys live.

   One of the first times I saw THE SLACKERS play was at a thrift store in Huntsville (next door to the northside Bandito Burrito, for any locals reading) with HEAVENLY BANGING CANNON and THE FUN GIRLS FROM MT PILOT. I remember that during their set, everything just kept breaking and falling apart, but they just kept playing. I think I remember their bass player, Joey getting naked and yelling a bunch. It probably sounded like crap, but they were way more fun than almost any band I had ever seen. It was really fun and inspiring to see this band and they changed everything for me. When I got back home, I immediately got my band to cover "Scram", off of their second 7" and no one in the band was excited about it because they really wanted to sound like PROPAGANDHI. It was disheartening and I gravitated more and more towards the scrappy punk that was rumbling from the Huntsville scene until I moved there the day after I graduated. I lived in my car for my first summer in Huntsville, usually parked right down the street from the van that the SLACKERS singer, Heiko lived in.

SLACKERS live at Lucy's Record Shop, Nashville, TN. 1994

   Joey (formerly of SHITBOY FROM OUTERSPACE and CHEESE ASS CHRIST) played the bass and his whiny, squeaky voice was a drastic contrast from Heiko's gravel-throated roar. Together, they sometimes did a call and response that sometimes worked, sometimes didn't, but was always entertaining. Their guitarist, Robert wrote the more poppy songs and provided a raw, fucked guitar sound that could only be made with the cheapest of equipment. Their drummer, Matt was barely hanging onto the beat in the beginning, but like I said, it meant a lot to this dumb teenager from the sticks. Their first songs like "I Wanna Destroy Music" and "Fatto The Cop" were anthems to me, helping to instill an early hatred of cops and a complete disdain for top 40 radio music. They followed their first 7" with "Circle A Your Day" in 1994, which showed them playing a little tighter, but not by much. The songs "$70 Rock Star" and "You Can't Do Just What You Want To Do" show a little more effort than their first 7", but retains all of the anger they've reserved for sellouts, posers, rich assholes and society at large. Their last recorded effort was a split 7" with the aforementioned FUN GIRLS and shows the band at their tightest. It always felt good as a teenager in Huntsville to sing along to "Society". "Fuck you and your racism! Fuck you and your sexism! Fuck you and your capitalism!" In "I Was A Teenage Anarchy", they sing about sniffing glue, making your own clothes, and being a punk. It fucking ruled and the complete and utter DEAD KENNEDYS rip-off part still kinda makes me laugh.

   In addition to their other tours, THE SLACKERS went on a one show tour out to California where they played at Gilman and ended up jumping onto a show at Epicenter. When they returned to Alabama, they left Heiko in Oakland (where he remains to this day) and broke up. They played one last show at the Tip-Top Cafe in Huntsville where punks came up to do their own impression of Heiko's singing for the band, since Heiko was stranded 3000 miles away. At the end of their set, Joey announced, "I'm starting a new band tomorrow called JOEY TAMPON AND THE TOXIC SHOCKS. If you want to be in it, talk to me about it." Even though I didn't really know Joey, I told him I wanted to be in his band since THE SLACKERS meant so much to me. Without knowing if I even played drums or not, Joey invited me to be in the band and true to his word, we had our first practice the next day. We were a band for the next 3 years and that dumb, talent-less 12 year old drummer inside of me was stoked beyond belief to actually be doing something that I never thought was even possible at one point in my life: playing in a punk band that put out records.

   THE SLACKERS also appeared on the "Play At Your Own Risk" compilation on Recess Records (now resisting the urge to toss out an aside about how Recess was once fun and punk, but has negated their credibility and relevance by putting out the newest SCREECHING WEASEL 12") and posthumously offered up 2 unreleased songs that appeared on the "Fuck The East Bay, This is N.O.K." comp. They are both in this download and they rule. I guess this isn't a complete discography because there is also a tape floating around of some more unreleased songs. If you have that, please send it to me, digitally or otherwise (emphasis on the otherwise).  Now concludes this lengthy essay on a band that you may not care about.

Download it
Link updated on 4/6/15. RIP Heiko)

UPDATE: THAT TAPE IS RIGHT HERE.

If you want to read EVEN MORE about the band, check out my old buddy, Seth's blog right here.

STUMBLEBUMS - Demo - Tape - 1995

   I only got to see the STUMBLEBUMS a handful of times before moving my sorry ass to Huntsville, AL (their hometown) in 1995. I was seriously scared of them because they looked fuckin' punk, were covered in bad tattoos and they usually looked pissed off. Also, they made fun of me and threatened me, so that helped the fear factor. It was funny to play in bands with them later and realize that they were total sweethearts and incredibly nice people most of the time.
    This band sounds like a tug of war between Heiko's (bass player/singer) love of "The Word As Law"-era NEUROSIS and Neil's (guitar/vocals) penchant for writing catchy guitar parts inspired by THE FREEZE, PEGBOY and GENERATION X. Ben (their drummer) stayed somewhere in the middle and worked to congeal their disparate styles into something concrete and punk as fuck. Their live shows were usually a chaotic mess, with punks throwing cans at them and the band trying to hold it together. They were definitely one of the reasons I moved away from my hometown and settled in Huntsville.
  Later in 1995, Heiko went on a one show tour to California with his other band THE SLACKERS (who will have a very long post on here one day) and his band left him there. He still resides in Oakland and has played in ONE MAN ARMY and U.S. BOMBS. Neil played in bands with me and then moved away to Arizona and I haven't seen or heard from him since. Ben, once a dude who scared the shit outta me, is now a tender, sweet man who plays drums in THE PINE HILL HAINTS.

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Link updated 4/6/15. RIP Heiko

JARVIS - 1st Demo - Tape - 1999

   JARVIS got together in 1999 in Huntsville, AL to write some excellent punk/pop-punk/Region Rock that continues to inspire me. Recording studios and options were slim during these days of punk in Alabama (and I'm sure they still are), so, if memory serves me correctly, JARVIS recorded this first batch of their songs with some goth/industrial dude at his house. When they got there, he told them to set up and then informed them that they would have to record each track separately because he either didn't have enough mics or he had obviously never recorded a punk band before. They were thrown into an utterly confusing recording session where the drums were recorded first, then the bass, then the guitar and then the vocals, rather than recording it all together like most punk bands do. I'm surprised that it came out as good as it did. (I'm not gonna lie...the sound quality on this is atrocious, but I still love a bunch of these songs. If you're reading about this band for the first time, I would suggest starting here).
  Quite a few of these songs never appeared on their other tapes or their 7". "Maids N Butlers" was one of the first songs I ever heard by them and I knew when it got to the first breakdown that I had a new favorite band. "I'm Gone Man" is also excellent and hints at the rock that Ryan (bass/vox) would be bringing with later bands like TRUE STEREO. "Sequence" was recorded at a practice and it's hard to tell what is happening in the song but still manages to have a completely badass breakdown. "The Dick Van Dykes" was the name of a sort-of hardcore band that I was in that shared a drummer (Bob) with JARVIS. We took on a challenge with JARVIS to see who could write a better song in the shortest amount of time. I think the time limit for writing the song was one minute. We won. Then, JARVIS stole our song. The song "...Reed" was one of the last songs RICE HARVESTER ever wrote (Harry's old band...the guitarist/vocalist), but it had completely different words. It's about Jarvis Reed (yes, the band's namesake), this kid that Harry's mom sort-of-non-legally adopted when he was younger. Jarvis was staying with them because his mom was addicted to crack and a mess. Harry and Jarvis hung out every day when they were kids, but as they got older, Jarvis went to a different school and they hung out less. Harry was never sure if Jarvis ashamed of him or if he thought vice versa...and he never found out because Jarvis died. I don't remember the circumstances, but it's a sad story.

   JARVIS Tape

50 MILLION - "This One's Pretty Cool, But I Like the Old Stuff Better" - CD - 1995

   I've already explained who 50 MILLION is and I've told you how much I love them, so I'll tell you about the first time I saw them, which is when I bought this CD.
   To be honest, I wasn't going to go to their show in Huntsville, AL back in 1997. I didn't know who they were and they were playing with some pretty crappy bands, but the flyer proclaimed "50  MILLION from San Francisco, featuring ex-members of J CHURCH". I loved J CHURCH, so I went to the show just to see 50 MILLION. (tangential side note: Wade from 50M played drums in J CHURCH for less than a year or so and recorded with them on "The Procession Of Simulacra - The Map Preceeds the Territory" 10", which coincidentally is the first record I ever heard by them.) I was more than a block away from the show and heard this loud, low booming voice of a guy talking somewhere. As I got closer, I realized that the voice was coming from this long-haired guy in front of the venue and he was talking a million miles per hour to one of my friends and telling her she had beautiful eyes. He turned to me as I walked up, saw the HICKEY patch on my jacket and introduced himself as "Shellhead". I found out that he was good friends with the guys from HICKEY (who had rolled through town a few months earlier) and they had told him to look for me and some of my friends. It was sweet. I met his brother Wade (the drummer on this tour) and their friend, Bloomie (the bass player). Shell continued to hit on my friend (very sweetly and not at all creepy, I might add. My friend was enjoying it and talking to him all night). It turns out that she was the ex of "J", this bruiser/greaser who had a reputation of starting fights with touring bands, young punks that were smaller than him and anyone who said anything slightly negative to him. He was a fucking jerk. I was afraid of him because I was young and scrawny. He had fought HICKEY, the SPAWN SACS and even tried to beat up my friend Ivy when she had a broken foot and was hobbling around on crutches. World class jerk here.

     Anyway, "J" was lurking around in the shadows, glaring at Shell talking to his ex while getting drunker and surlier. It didn't help matters that when 50 MILLION took the stage, they played a HICKEY song and dedicated their sweetest, sappiest songs to the woman. 

   As far as their live show went, I was sold. They played everything from awesome pop-punk to metallish dirges to feedback-laden experimental noise. They were pretty fucking amazing that night. Also, they set up all of their equipment in front of the band's stuff that played before them, thereby trapping it back there so that the douchey, crappy pop-punk band that played before them had to wait until they were done so that they could load out. I remember watching the members of that band stare helplessly and hopelessly as 50 MILLION played a 10 minute version of "She Is a Monster", making it drag slower and slower until Shell was laying on the floor, making his guitar feedback and Wade was playing something like 5 beats per minute. It felt like vindication for having to watch that crappy band's piss-poor excuse for pop-punk for 30 minutes.

   Anyway, at some point during the set, Shell tackled me in a faux wrestling match and we rolled around on the floor in a fake fight. "J" took that as his cue to attack and ran up to kick Shell in the head a couple of times, which he defended as protecting me (totally ridiculous, since that dude threatened me numerous times). After the show was over and 50 MILLION had packed up, Shell was talking to the woman and "J" made his move. He started pushing Shell around and threatened to kick his ass for trying to steal his girlfriend. Wade ran up, jumped between them and threatened to kill the guy, telling him that he would cut his head off. (a little background: Wade had parts of his head shaved off. He's an old Texas bad-ass covered in homemade tattoos and has a nasty disposition, but a heart of gold. On this tour, he looked like a completely deranged, sadistic, escaped mental patient.) "J", for the first time ever, looked genuinely scared of someone. I left with 50 MILLION in their van and found out that Wade had a machete tucked into his pants the whole time. He had fully intended to cut off "J"'s head if he didn't back off. As Wade was driving to my house, he calmly said "I'm glad I didn't have to blow his head off with the shotgun". I turned around and the shotgun was right behind me.

   I bought this CD from them at the show, even though Shell told me that it sounded nothing like their live show. I thought it was weird that a band would put out something that was wholly unrepresentative of their sound but I bought it anyway and it bummed me out when I listened to it for the first time. Over time, it quickly grew to be my most favorite thing that the band has ever put out. It's a collection of home recordings by the two brothers that dates back as far as the mid-70's, but mostly sticks to the early-to-mid-90's. A lot of the songs were started by one brother who recorded his part and then sent the master tape through the mail to the other brother to finish. It includes now-classic songs like "Baltimore", "Burn Away", "Egg in the Face", "Evergreen" (which Matty Luv of HICKEY once called "the saddest song ever written") and 22 more. 50 MILLION were (and are) a brilliant band that encompassed the hopes, dreams and ultimate failures of being broke and hopeless, but found solace and comfort in that and learned to be proud of and celebrate their lives, no matter what. They were also drug-addled, drunk and unapologetic, but who wasn't? I'm so very happy that they made it out of the 90's Mission punk scene alive.

Download 50 MILLION

   ...and here is the reason I didn't use "J"'s real name in the story. You may wonder, "Why would you use an alias for some jerk who beat up all of your friends?" Well, a few years after leaving Huntsville, I went back to visit for a few days. Some friends and I went out to the river to hang out and drink a few beers. On the way, they said they were gonna pick up "J" to go with us. I said "uhhh...what the fuck dudes? I don't wanna hang out with this macho fuckwad" (or something like that). They just said it was cool and picked him up. After a couple of drinks, I said "I need to talk to you" and pulled him aside. After all of these years, I had gained some self-confidence and decided to tell him how I felt. I tore into him about how demeaning it was that he beat the shit out of young punks, how fucked up it was that he threatened women with violence and what my friends across the country thought of him. I told him how angry I was at him for all of those years and how much I wanted someone to just beat the living shit out of him. Then, I braced myself for the beating he was about to give me. He didn't. He stood there and listened to everything that I had to say and then he told me that I was right and that he was sorry. I couldn't believe it. This guy had never shown any remorse in the moment or admitted any signs of weakness or apology. He explained that he grew up fighting as a means of survival and as a way of life. As he got older, he didn't see any other way of living and fighting became his only method of solving problems or disputes. He told me that he wasn't happy during that time and worked a lot on changing his behavior to become a better person. He didn't expect me or anyone else to forgive him for all of the harm he had caused so many people, but he wanted me to tell those people that he's really sorry and he wishes that he could make up for it somehow. So, if you ever lived in Huntsville or came through there in a punk band in the 90's, it's highly possible that you know who I'm talking about...and if he fought you for some stupid reason, he's sorry. The rest of that night hanging out with him was great and memorable. I even hugged that motherfucker at the end of the night. Life is strange.

If you want to order stuff by 50 MILLION and many other great bands, please visit STARCLEANER.