Be still our beating hearts! The cheap thrills in this gig can be few and far between. The expensive ones are plentiful, the cheap ones, not so much. After all, if politics is showbusiness for ugly people then business can often be showbiz for the charismatically challenged.
So imagine our delight at receiving an email from Elliott Management's Michael O'Looney – the dreamboat director of comms for gazillionaire Paul Singer's activist shareholder outfit currently making a tilt for our very own big miner, BHP.
Keen readers of this column will recall we breathlessly recounted O'Looney's many and varied pre-Elliott accomplishments – including his stint as a CBS news reporter, his days as a hostage-neutralising NYPD commissioner – and most notably, his square-jawed squiring of his unfathomably glamorous wife, US TV anchor Annika Pergament (shout out to Annika, who's a confirmed Rear Window fan. We're big fans of yours too!).
O'Looney was moved to contact us last week after our story about the lack of traction Elliott's campaign to convince retail (and insto) investors of a need for a change in direction at the Big Australian. In it, we cited SimilarWeb analytics which revealed Elliott's flash, Crosby-Textor-produced "FixBHP" website had attracted only some 2000 visitors between April and July – despite billboards and a widespread campaign to rally supporters to their corporate raiding cause.
Not so, according to the Big O. He emailed to tell us that according to figures from his back end (not a euphemism), the site had attracted 22,000 visitors and their Facebook banner ads had registered some 100,000 impressions.
While we had him on the line, we asked if he cared to comment on rumours doing the rounds that Elliott was struggling to find a big name Aussie businessman or woman willing to attach their name to the corporate raider's effort. After all, who would want to blot their copybook with one of the country's biggest boards by strapping themselves to a putsch that could ultimately fall flat? According to sources, most local execs of any note or quality are nervous about adding their name to an effort that, if unsuccessful, could stymie their chances of other directorships here in Australia.
"The BHP board are not the sorts of people you mess with lightly," said our mole.
So, Big O. What say'st thou? Is it true no one here wants to hitch their wagon to your caravan?
"Unfortunately I need to decline comment," O'Looney responded.
You know where to find us if that changes, Big O. You know where to find us.
