I prefer low-maintenance goldfish . . .

Silence of the Bams

Absolute genius. Had me in tears when I watched it for the seventh time. Better than the original.

SILENCE OF THE BENEFIT SCROUNGERS from drweetabix on Vimeo.

Blood, Salt, Water by Denise Mina (Orion Books 2015)

She’d been as biddable as a heifer for the two days they had her. She came willingly when they picked her up in the van. She asked no favours, made no appeals for mercy while they waited for Wee Paul to give the final word: kill her or let her go.

The Big Bounce (2004)

Heaven Help Us (1985)

Gone Girl (2014)