Plot
Patsy Brand is a chorus girl at the Pleasure Garden music hall. She meets Jill Cheyne who is down on her luck and gets her a job as a dancer. Jill meets adventurer Hugh Fielding and they get engaged, but when Hugh travels out of the country, she begins to play around.
Keywords: based-on-novel, chorus-girl, craziness, extramarital-affair, honeymoon, jealousy, marriage, melodrama, murder, suicide
[first title card]::Title Card: The highly popular reviews at the Pleasure Garden Theater are staged by Mr. Hamilton.
[first lines]::Pleasure Garden theatergoer: That's an exquisite chorus line, Mr. Hamilton.::Oscar Hamilton: Meet Patsy Brand.::Pleasure Garden theatergoer: I had to meet you because I was charmed by that lovely curl of hair.::Patsy Brand: [detaches the curl and presents it] Then I give it to you and hope you have a nice time. Now that wasn't a very clever line, was it?
[last lines]::Patsy Brand: How do you like that - Cuddles knew all the time!
Levett is an Anglo-Norman territorial surname deriving from the village of Livet-en-Ouche, now Jonquerets-de-Livet, in Eure, Normandy. Ancestors of the earliest Levett family in England, the de Livets were lords of the village of Livet, and undertenants of the de Ferrers, among the most powerful of William the Conqueror's Norman lords.
One branch of the de Livet family came to England during the Norman Conquest, nearly a thousand years ago, and were prominent first in Leicestershire, and later in Derbyshire,Cheshire, Ireland and Sussex, where they held many manors, including the lordship of Firle. The name Livet (first recorded as Lived in the 11th century), of Gaulish etymology, may mean a "place where yew-trees grow". Like many Normans, the family's origins are probably partly Scandinavian.
The year of the family's arrival in England is uncertain. But the family name appears in the records of William the Conqueror. The first family member in England, Roger de Livet, appears in Domesday as a tenant of the Norman magnate Henry de Ferrers. de Livet held land in Leicestershire, and was, along with Ferrers, a benefactor of Tutbury Priory. By about 1270, when the Dering Roll was crafted to display the coats of arms of 324 of England's most powerful lords, the coat of arms of Robert Livet, Knight, was among them.
Miley Ray Cyrus (born Destiny Hope Cyrus; November 23, 1992) is an American actress and pop singer-songwriter. She achieved wide fame for her role as Miley Stewart/Hannah Montana on the Disney Channel sitcom Hannah Montana.
Cyrus recorded music for the soundtracks, Hannah Montana (2006) and Hannah Montana 2/Meet Miley Cyrus (2007), released by Walt Disney Records. With the success of the Hannah Montana franchise she established herself as a teen idol. In 2007, Cyrus signed to Hollywood Records to pursue a solo career. She embarked upon the Best of Both Worlds Tour the same year, in which she performed as both herself and in character as Hannah Montana. The tour was eventually turned into a high-grossing concert film titled Hannah Montana & Miley Cyrus: Best of Both Worlds Concert (2008). In July 2008, Cyrus released her first solo album, Breakout (2008), which was commercially successful.
She began her foray into film by providing the voice of "Penny" in the animated film Bolt (2008). Cyrus earned a nomination for the Golden Globe Award for Best Original Song for her performance of Bolt's theme song, "I Thought I Lost You". She also reprised her role as Miley Stewart/Hannah Montana in Hannah Montana: The Movie (2009). The Hannah Montana: The Movie' soundtrack introduced her to new audiences within country and adult contemporary markets.
Kyrie Irving (born March 23, 1992) is an Australian-American professional basketball player for the Cleveland Cavaliers of the National Basketball Association (NBA). He played as a point guard for Duke University as a freshman before being selected as the 1st overall pick in the 2011 NBA Draft by Cleveland. He won the NBA Rookie of the Year Award in 2012. Irving was born in Melbourne and grew up in New Jersey.
Irving was born in Melbourne, Victoria, Australia where his father, Drederick Irving, played professional basketball for the Bulleen Boomers. Irving subsequently lived in Australia before relocating to the United States at the age of 2. He has dual citizenship in the United States and Australia. Irving's mother, Elizabeth, died from an illness when he was four, so Drederick raised him with the help of Irving's aunts. Growing up in New Jersey, Irving was a fan of the New Jersey Nets. His father took him and his sister to Continental Airlines Arena during the 2003 NBA Finals.
Irving played for Montclair Kimberley Academy his freshman and sophomore years, where he averaged 26.5 points, 10.3 assists, 4.8 rebounds and 3.6 steals and became only the school's 2nd 1,000 point scorer, before transferring to St. Patrick. While at St. Patrick High School, Irving played with Michael Gilchrist, who was widely regarded as one of the best players in the class of 2011. On January 20, 2010, it was announced that Irving was selected to the 2010 Junior National Select Team. The team played at the 2010 Nike Hoop Summit at the Rose Garden in Portland, Oregon, on April 10. He was also selected to play in the 2010 McDonald's All-American Game and the 2010 Jordan Brand Classic, where he was named as co-mvp with Harrison Barnes. In June 2010 Irving was a part of the gold medal winning team at the FIBA Americas U18 Championship. Irving was the #2 player in the class of 2010 by Scout.com, #3 player in the ESPNU 100, and rated as the #4 player by Rivals.com.
Melvin Levett (born April 25, 1976 in Cleveland, Ohio) is an American basketball player. As a shooting guard he was drafted by the Detroit Pistons and then later traded to the Los Angeles Lakers organization, though he never appeared in a regular season NBA game. Nicknamed "The Helicopter" for his lengthy hangtime, he played collegiately for the University of Cincinnati. While in college, he set the University of Cincinnati single-game record for three-point field goals when he made 10 against Eastern Kentucky.
Bliss n Eso are an ARIA Award-winning Australian hip hop band based in Sydney, and were originally known as Bliss N' Esoterikizm for their debut EP The Arrival. Bliss N Eso are currently signed to Melbourne record label Illusive Sounds, and are managed and booked by label co-founders Adam Jankie and Matt Gudinski.
The trio, American MC Bliss (Jonathan Notley), Australian MC Eso (Max MacKinnon) and DJ Izm (Tarik Ejjamai) of Moroccan heritage, have been friends (and have rapped together) since high school. Notley moved to Australia in 1992 when he was thirteen and met MacKinnon at the Glenaeon Steiner School in Sydney.
"When I got to Australia, I met Eso (MacKinnon) and he was the only guy at my school into hip-hop. It was so scarce you'd be lucky to find a hip-hop record in a store let alone a whole section." - Jonathan "Bliss" Notley
"Back then hip hop was basically non-existent; there was no urban or hip-hop section in the CD stores. You'd be lucky to find a couple of albums like a Public Enemy album or something if you went to the CD stores. So I guess that's one of the reasons why Max, who's Eso, and I kinda bonded at high school, I think, because he was really the only other guy in the school who was into hip-hop." - Jonathan "Bliss" Notley
Morning comes slow when you don't know
If your gonna make it there so you bite your nails and pull your hair
You grind your teeth and man don't you do your share
It's a wicked addiction, pure friction
And the truth about your lies is their all just fiction
And now I know so I'm just gonna have to let you go
And it took you to show me how
That it takes two to bring each other down
You brought me down
Day moves quick when you stick yourself sick
For an hour you float then it's all back down
You pass the others as your leaving town
And it's a crooked affliction your mind gets spinning
And your spine gets twisted
And everybody that you know is out to take everything you own
Each other
Night moves fast the shadows that you cast
Run away from you
And everyone that you touch turns blue
And their all watching you
And it's a wicked addiction, pure friction
And the truth about your lies
Is their all just fiction and now I know
So I'm gonna have to let you go
And it's a wicked addiction pure friction
all that I am just what you made never gonna forgive you for that now
and all of of my mistakes yeah all that I made
guess I'm never gonna live them down
wipe them all away it's easier to face
when I don't have to watch them fail
and all that I am it's easier to face
and now I wipe them all away
it's easier to face
took just what you wanted never gonna give it back
you f#*@ed me around for the last time my friend
just because you got a pretty face don't mean
that i'll cave into you again
wipe them all away it's easier to face
when I don't have to watch it fail
know that I am it's easier to face
and now I wipe them all away
one last time it's easier to face
and now I wipe them all away
all of my gifts never gonna take back
all that i am just what you made
wish i simplified it for myself
then i could deny when it comes down
guess i should have lived this misery
and kept everything else a mystery
want to cut my eyes out for you now
so I can never see another face
what an innocent disgrace
what if I had never bothered to find out what I'd lose
guess I should have kept it to myself
guess I should have put it on a shelf
want to cut my eyes out for you now
so I can never see another face
never look into those eyes again
I'll always be an innocent disgrace
holding you hold it in
so long it finally weighed you down
an now i don't believe that you couldn't see it
couldn't see a thing
never look into those eyes again
i'll never look into those eyes again
never look into those eyes again
words are running out again
words are pouring down your face like tears
and every little thing that you feel is running down
from your wicked little mouth again
pain that you feel comes from the way that you've been living easy
and every little thing that you feel comes running down
from your wicked little mouth again
wicked little mouth again
here it comes again
and the words are running down here they come again
words are pouring down your face like tears
and every little thing that you feel comes running down
all along put the blame on you devil in the mirror
don't know who i am
hardened by time a little less than you
detrimental fear you were once to me
just the one now it's split in two
tell me don't you feel it
are you wounded too
wonder are you wounded too
thinking about all that was said i went mad and burned you out
hardened by time a little less than you
and now i finally see it
just the one now it's split in two
tell me don't you see it
and all along all i wanted was you
tell me don't you feel it
was the one that i wanted in you
tell me don't you feel it
all along all i wanted was you
wonder are you wounded too
hardened by time a little less than you
the car is parked her mom and dad are fast asleep inside
she sits across from me she licks her lips and bats her eyes
the time to make the move is now
i slide across the seat i want to try and take it slow
i hope she don't reject me don't think i could take the blow
i get the nerve and then I slide my hand inside her skirt
she crossed her legs and broke my wrist and yeah-
it f@#*ing hurts the pain is killing me
i know i'm not alone
i'm not the only one
broken to the bone
see through me
it's three weeks later and we cut the cast and hit the town
crazy scene and everybody there was getting down i want her badly
so i waited for her in the hall
looked into the room and she was in a free for all
the pain is killing me its f@#*ing killing me now
won't you tell me why she's doing this
won't you tell me why she's doing it
i wanna know right now
won't you tell me right now
i want to hear it right now
so won't you tell me right now
said she has a secret in her pocket
i don't think she's ever gonna show nobody else
bet she has a secret hidden in her past
i don't think she's ever gonna pull it off the shelf
and no one knows why she keeps it to herself
and she wishes she was someone else
said she hears voices screaming in her head
i don't think their demons but there's really nothing else
said she hates her mom but i think it should be dad
i don't think she's ever gonna figure it out
nobody knows her
said she has a secret in her pocket
i don't think she's ever gonna show nobody else
said she hears voices screaming in her head
I don't think she's ever gonna let them out
nobody knows her
take you on a rocket ride to the moon
you wouldn't come back
even though you knew i was tired
standing on the sun you looked so bright
i felt the meltdown you put the clamp down
on me again
i couldn't wake up when i tried
you stood there laughing as i died
read about your ruin as they said it was self inflicted
and i thought just like you to prove yourself again
i held the key to your success
loaded gun in the top drawer you overlooked it
: or did you?
i couldn't wake up when i tried
you left me for a rocket ride
long enough you held your breath
long enough to keep me here
i couldn't leave if i...
i couldn't leave you if i tried, even if i tried
i'd be so much better off without you now
first in cut down she watches his caress her skin
last call she's ready now it's time to fill the need she feels
ain't no one around she takes a hand the cross she wears around her neck
broken heart she tattoos there
last one standing in the crowd is usually the one she's with
gender doesn't matter to her now it's just to fill the need she feels
ain't no one around he takes her hand the cross she wears around her neck
broken heart she tattoos there now
maybe this one will stay she prays
sunlight shows it's ugly face again
it's time to fill the need to feel
ain't no one around he takes her hand the cross she wears around her neck
broken heart she tattoos there now
ain't no one around she's dying there the phone that lays across the bed
one more call she's got to make
with a need to fill
just a need to fill
rub me out make me weak like I'm dying
i won't give in again stronger than you thought
i'm what you wanted, you made me what you wanted, you made me what you wanted
i'm the mess you made
the way I live you don't get now you want to try it
your way to late and missed your call headed on my own
i'm what you wanted, you made me what you wanted, you made me what you wanted
you try and push me try and knock me to the ground
you try and push me but i won't go down
you try and stop me try and stand in my way
you try and stop me but your much too late
i won't give anything, anything, anything:
anything at all you made me what you wanted, you made me what you wanted
you made me what you wanted, you made me what you wanted
i'm the mess you made
don't you settle when you should move the edges around
wide awake you can't get up, overwhelmed
and if this is all you say there is
then iv'e had enough i want to taste the razor kiss
I want to see too much
lost what you learned along the way it's all behind you now
all that you'd just as soon forget always finds you somehow
alone on a ship that won't sail on a sea of regret
another storm out in the distance another day
lost what you learned along the way it's all behind you now
all that you'd just as soon forget always finds you somehow
it's all been a crazy dream endless falls and whispered screams
nothing is what it seems never is never was
now the years go by like days hours carve lines in your face
someone new to take your place never is never was
lost what you learned along the way:
anything that you wanted anything at all
well I would have given to you
now that your gone I take it all away
and you can't find the truth and now your drowning
i would of made you strong
And i wouldn't let you fall
And i want to turn you on again
everything that you wanted everything that you got
i have given to you
now that your gone i want it back again
and you don't feel the same and i take the blame
i would of made you strong
And i wouldn't let you fall
And i want to turn you on again
you don't feel a thing anymore it's all gone wrong
i still taste the blame today
cocked and loaded
pointed in my direction
no protection guess your gonna
hit me with it
slow implosion
no one knows what makes it all tick
guess we're gonna
burn out trying
hollow to the core we are
swallowed
broken by the mold
no one knows how we lost control
no one knows why
one explosion haunts you slow
and small it all is a speck of dust
you'll wipe right off in time
and when it all ends
how can you say you never were a slave
look em in the eye
and face it
no one knows
pointed in my direction
guess your gonna hit me with it
pointed in my direction
stop the lies and i'll promise not to shut you out
i'd give you everything
if you'd only throw away your doubts
shut the blinds open the door, fifteen times
fifty bars of soap
and you use each one never more than twice
and i need to know where you run to now
i need to know where you run and hide
cause it doesn't get better and it don't get worse
always stays the same
cause it's as good as we can get can get can get
take a walk and never step on any lines or cracks
bring the food it's always wrong
you always send it back
clean the floor and line the shelves but it's never right
set the table up the spoon, the fork and then the knife
girls hit back
when you least expect
where you most regret it
girls they don't understand
why i love my friends
more than them
i don't mean to say it but somebody
needs to put an end to them
i don't mean to say it but somebody
needs to put an end to girls
girls decorate the house
with flowers and cows
and pictures of the family
girls think their misunderstood
but i know goddamned well
all the things they do
they do to nerve me
they'll never understand
tell him what you know thought you had me
but i let it go
and now i'm gonna take down the whole thing
everything is going down with me
thought you told him everything
left out a little bit about yourself
and i found out from your best friend
i think its time that i filled him in
and now i'm gonna take down the whole thing
everything is going down
with me
you know to much keep it to yourself
so much at stake but you don't give a damn
and now it's coming back on you
you keep on pushing baby can't you see
always try but your never gonna get to me
i'll make sure this time
tell him what you know i thought you had me
but you let me go
can't take it anymore cause
i got so much i've been saving up
it's such a put on the way you try and hold me back
and its a let down how you fell apart so fast
so you hold on think your gonna finally get your way
and then you shut down shut it down again and
I won't breath until you cave into to me
I won't leave this place now
plant my feet on your ground
wipe your mind i'll wash my hands
memories of enemies are all you have
I won't breath until you cave into to me
I won't leave this place now
plant my feet until you cave into me
nothing left until you:come back down
come back
give, no i can't give
given in
no i can't take it anymore
wake, no i won't wake i won't shine
i won't fake it anymore
i said bye bye-bye-bye
she'll close her eyes and leave this place
bye-bye-bye
she closed her eyes
give, given in i settle in
like a seed the dirt is sewn
when she says i won't wait
can't smile again won't fake it anymore
she don't wanna feel anything at all
you pretend not to notice it standing there next to you
you act so hard don't you really wish it could be home under you
don't even try to make sense of it now
your better off when your by yourself
look in the eye and a motion made but you wind up alone again
so much to tell but you save face and you never say anything
don't even try to make sense of it now
your better off when your by yourself
nothing you can say to yourself
your better off now
think your better than the rest of them
only so much you can stand
so much better than the rest of them
only so much you can stand
don't even try to make sense of it now
your better off by yourself
nothing you can say to yourself
pushing on it never really made her any stronger
waited so long I wondered is she ever coming down
is she ever coming down
is she ever gonna come back down
took away the motivation
feet are moving forward but she's falling fast
took me so long to figure out
last on the vine to know about
intuition try and tell me but I always doubt it
now I want to try it now I won't deny it
pulling under spinning now she's spinning on the way down
and she wonders how it got so heavy couldn't set it down
took me so long to figure out
last on the vine to know about
intuition try and tell me but I always doubt it
now I want to try it
holding on she's hanging on she's hanging all the way down
wait so long I think she's going crazy then she finally comes down
I have no regrets about how I live my life live this lie until now
I took something you took something now there's nothing left to take
It's time to put this whole damn thing to rest to bed to bed now
Chose to stick around even though I confessed
held your own secret even in the bitter end
I took something you took something now there's nothing left to fake
It's time to put this god damned thing to rest to bed
and now it's much too late for apologies now
and now it's much too late for apologies now
it's too much it's too late to late again
all I wanted was everything I could take for free
it's much too late
ever since the first time that i laid my eyes upon you
yeah there was something about it, something about it
i knew i never ever want to find another
yeah there was something
that made me want to
wrap myself around you
til it all connects
wrap myself around you
til it all falls into place
ever since the first time that i laid my hands upon you
yeah there was something about it, something about it
i knew i never ever want to touch another
yeah there was something about it, something about it
every time i get a little further out
yeah you bring me back, something about it
makes never ever want to run again
yeah there was something
that made want to
wrap myself around you
til it all connects
wrap myself around you
til it all falls into place
i never want to find myself
without you there
cause i know there's nowhere else
to wrap myself around you
til it all connects
wrap myself around you
til it all falls in
wrap myself around you
til it all connects
wrap myself around you
til it all falls into place
i'll wrap myself
i'll wrap myself around you
another superstar set in place
and for a year they shove him in your face
then he's burned out on a tabloid cover
strung up and left for dead
nothing left of him now
he's useless
nothing left of him now
started out an underground sensation
androgynous a king or the queen
looks the best when he's near starvation
someday they'll fix his teeth
nothing left of him now
he's useless
take all the pictures back down
useless
nothing left of him now
they'll use him till
there's nothing left now
see him falling down through the charts
he's falling faster falling farther
can't find his way through the plagiarizing assholes
they stole his art and repossessed his car
nothing left now:useless
so much for the i dos
nothing ever takes you off my mind
pictures put in cardboard boxes
now it seems like you've just stopped the time
changed my clock to make it tick backwards
but the time is still slipping away
i smile on the outside, lonely on the inside
you'll never know how miserable i've been
some days i just stay in bed
waiting for a dream where you arrive
but instead i wake up to another day
empty house of memories things you say
stuck inside i wish i'd die
smile on the outside, lonely on the inside
you'll never know how miserable i've been
i'm smiling on the outside, lonely on the inside
you'll never know how miserable i've been
change my number threw the sheets away
all my friends just think that i'm a disgrace
everyday i find something else to miss about you
and i wonder do you feel the same
i smile on the outside, lonely on the inside
you'll never know how miserable i've been
smile on the outside, lonely on the inside
you'll never know how miserable i've been
woah oh oh woah oh oh woah oh oh oh oh oh oh
i could tell you something but you'd never keep it to yourself
never shut your mouth and one day it's gonna get you in the end
shouldn't of told you wish i didn't know you
want to make you just fade away
frustrated so you threw it all away
everything
yeah you threw it all away
everything
yes you love it when your sitting on the edge
tugging on the rope watching everybody spin
soon enough I know your gonna wind up mixed up in it
shouldn't of told you wish i didn't know you
but you love to see me in pain
frustrated so you threw it all away
everything
yeah you threw it all away
everything
now you started over with nothing
everything
you threw it all away ...everything
spinning in circles
till you find another crowd
spinning in circles
i could tell you something but you'd never keep it to yourself
never shut your mouth and one day you'll throw it all away
empty feeling in a crowded room he knew that
he shouldn't have come today
best intentions get misunderstood
he just wanted to see her face again
thinks it might just be the last time
everyday his courage slips alittle more
he knows soon it's gonna have to end
since she's gone and seen the one before
he'd been living in a memory till now
never wanted to face it until now
couldn't even say the name until now
cut his wrist and let the blood spill out
couldn't face it till now
shook her fathers hand good bye
kissed her mother on the face she started to cry
hate so strong it always showed
no one said it but he'd always know
blue flowers on her mattress are all that he sees now
a broken picture of her face that just won't fade
it's finally gonna fade now
cause he'd been living in a memory till now
never wanted to face it until now
couldn't even say the name until now
couldn't even say the name until now
never wanted to face it till now
morning comes slow when you don't know
if your gonna make it there so you bite your nails and pull your hair
you grind your teeth and man don't you do your share
it's a wicked addiction, pure friction
and the truth about your lies is their all just fiction
and now i know so i'm just gonna have to let you go
and it took you to show me how
that it takes two to bring each other down
you brought me down
day moves quick when you stick yourself sick
for an hour you float then it's all back down
you pass the others as your leaving town
and it's a crooked affliction your mind gets spinning
and your spine gets twisted
and everybody that you know is out to take everything you own
each other
night moves fast the shadows that you cast
run away from you
and everyone that you touch turns blue
and their all watching you
and it's a wicked addiction, pure friction
and the truth about your lies
is their all just fiction and now i know
so i'm gonna have to let you go
and it's a wicked addiction pure friction
Disarray, tearing me, what's left to say?
See me break into misery, nowhere left to stay
Can I say, you don't care for me – it's even anyway
Self enraged, you're blaming me. You'll blame yourself one day
You're enraged, keep it in its cage
I don't wanna hear this
I don't need to see this
Self enraged, I'm your source of blame
I don't wanna hear this
I don't need to see this
Generate, all your in hate me – it's your only way
Can you hate for your jealousy – can you get away?
Is it safe? You threaten me – put your rage away
Look away; don't talk to me, just keep away
This feeling of pain
An act of reign
Wont leave my mind
Wont keep me broken
Showered in shame
Who should I blame
For the dreams they've shattered
For the lives they've stolen
My body's thin
Telling me don't give in
This one will do you best
This one will keep you rolling
Seems I can't win
Where should I begin?
I can search for something
To wash away my sin
Leave it all behind
I walked away
Never cried my eyes out
I severed and I simply chose to stray
I closed my eyes
And to bar these lies out
It's too late to call,
Said the blue knight who keeps watch beside my wall
You said the sadness became small
You've grown immune and told yourself you wouldn't fall
Convincing me seems to me
So important when it shouldn't be
When you deceive you only free
The part that keeps you as a part of me
But now I'm shocked and my pride's been mocked, and
You're pushing needles through my skin
In dreams I've walked in where the gun is cocked, and
I see the chamber takes a spin
Cause the pain is sinking in
And I'm rarely lost
But rather broke and crossed
Let me out, pull me in
Before my head caves in
My heart's been tossed
And now my pain's embossed
Pick me up, pull me down
Until I reach the ground
It's too hot inside
As I reach out to my left, turn on my fan and sigh
I try again to close my eyes
I'll be okay – I simply add to endless lies
Reminding me of what I've wasted
Hurts me more than being hated
Cause now my soul's become shaded
And now my heart is coiled and braided
I hope to heal in time
I hope to clear my mind
I'll wash you down with time
Once again, you say I'm mocking
Pardon me but I'm merely talking
Close my eyes and count the sheep
Lying here where I'm sure to weep
But there's something deep inside that
Makes me wanna think, am I really the weakest link?
There's something in your eyes that seems to let me
know
You know a lot more than you wanna show
But deep inside I'm breaking down
I can't take it when you're not around
Makes me sick when you tell a lie
Causing shit as you watch it die
All is stolen, even my own folks are leaving
Not a sound – looks like there's no-one else around
Not a spoken reason, it's not myself I'm pleasing
Look around – seems happiness just can't be found
Here again I've trouble walking
Head down – the laughter is mocking
In this hole I feel the heat
In a place where I'll always weep
But there's something in the sky that
Makes me wanna drink to the point where I cannot think
Something in my mind that seems to let me know
There's only one place where I'm meant to go
I'm still crying in my bed at night
Why do I bother putting up a fight?
Should I crawl into a corner
And let myself explode?
Should I even try to make believe
I have dreams that I can still achieve?
Should I just sit tight and watch it die
Ascending to the sky?
So far I stand, looking closely again
It's loose but solid, so clean and tarnished
So lost again, a map in my hand
So full and empty, with so little but plenty
At times we get so lost and devastated
Our paths are vague but still so regulated
At times we feel so tired of trying to try
Wishing we could change all the things that make us
Cry, I won't try to wash these tears out from my
Eyes, I won't try, cause they're the kind that never
Dry, they collide with everything I've ever tried to hide
And keep inside
Above, I'm sitting, so loose but fitting
I'm starved by eating, so cured by bleeding
My gut is misled by all the pictures I've read
My memory's dead but you remain in my head
Now I'm sealed but leaking
So silently speaking. Now I understand
I've confused my reading
A door closed but open
Brand spanking new and broken
So belligerent and strident
Sure is tight in my throat; I haven't flipped the boat
Sometimes I cry so much it makes me wanna scream
Tied tightly to the tee
Slowly pushing at the seams
I should have had other dreams
But it's this that makes me so unique
Foresee
The situations leading them to asking me
Foresee
That what I need may never be a part of me
Can I take
Can't you see your apathy is killing me
And my dream
Growing sick has become so hard
I must say that I'm growing too old to see
Lost in my zone – no reflection to see or even call my
I must say that I'm growing too old to see
Climbing up the slope; I can't reach the rope
Sometimes it feels like there's no-one on my team
Tied tightly to the tee
Slowly pushing at the seams
I should have had all the dreams
But there's nothing left inside of me
And I know it'll all be the same
I'll cry till it drives me insane
I will always be the same
Alone in my own hall of fame
I cry; can't get rid of this pain
It's more like my own hall of shame
Look into the mirror and see
My reflection's but a ghost of me
Slowly looking back at me
Asking me in two years where I'll be
Sadly lowering my eyes
I continue in disguise
Until this dream that's make believe
Living in a hole; it's hard to get for what you asked
The hardest part of having a good day is making it last
It seems that everywhere I turn I'm still a step behind
I'm going nowhere slow and I think I'm losing my mind
Growing older every day is not a simple task
It's even harder when your happiness is your most worn
mask
Striving harder to evolve and keep up with the rest
The apathetic push you down and make you second best
I look to you to get me up again
The hardest part is admitting that I need a second hand
If only I was meant to work with my ears and hands
What's coming down would be beneath me
It isn't easy living up to everyone you see
But being human we're so stupid we won't let it be
The pressure rises as we struggle here on our own
To the point when you're only happy when you're all
alone
I look to you to get me up again
The hardest part is admitting that I need a second hand
If only I was meant to work with my ears and hands
What's coming down would be beneath me (X2)
I look to you to get me up again
The hardest part is admitting that I need a second hand
If only I was meant to work with my ears and hands
What's coming down would be beneath me (X2)
I look to you to get me up again
The hardest part is admitting that I need a second hand
If only I was meant to work with my ears and hands
Can't clear my head
It's 7:56 in the AM
Self-pity is all I've read
Sitting feeling sorrow till I wish I'm dead
Never occurred to me
My problems were the only ones that I would see
So please forgive me
Cause what you've lost in life is worse than any of my
dreams
At least I can say
The ones I love are still here to love me
I know I would break
If I had to be convinced they were above me
So far, I must say I've been fortunate and lucky
And I hope to God one day
You will feel the same
And I hope you know you're not the one to blame
Can't get out of bed
Emotions are the reasons I have bled
I look to you, my friend
And know that I should be thankful in the end
I didn't want to see
My sadness filtered everything so selfishly
But now I really see
That losing them would be losing a part of me
Now I've found something else
To make me feel fine
What I've found builds and heals
In very short time
We replace what's been lost
But never this kind
If you search hard enough
Tired of myself
Sheets over my eyes
Tired of this mess
Ideas come but
Nothing seems to stick with me
It's hard, you see
Building, pulling
All these strings are tied by me
Tied right to me
Can't believe that this is me
Everything is falling through
The way they do
If I failed to be like you
What would I become, what would I become?
If there's one thing I can do
Consider it done, consider it done
Ambition is thin
Tired of this fight
I'm losing my mind
Struggling to break through
And ideas come but
I could fall – pick myself up
Let it go – burning through my life
Fuck it up – turn the lights out
Let me be – let me feel so weak
But strong enough to rely on
You're there for me, I'll be there for you
To get you through while you fight on
To anchor me – do it all for me
Ambition is thin
Wish I had your blood under my skin
Live to imitate and fake to break
The door that lies between both genres
Saying it's all the same...
Somebody better stop me before I delete you
Before the bullet accidentally meets you
You think you control all you see
Strangle hold around me
Prove you wrong, yes you'll see
Stretch and get down
I'll shoot you down, I will now
I'll shoot you down...
Counting down from seven – a shotgun heaven
Lyrically inclined and set out to blow your mind
I love the way you imitate
The way you hide your face
The way you think you have it all
But really it ain't the case
I see you from the inside
Through the mask you wear – all you wanna hide
All I see through what I learn
Live by what I earn
All I see through what I learn
The colors that we burn
All I see through what I learn
Coming round, freaking out
Till you finally get it all complete
Every day and all the games we play
You've got me strung so high I cannot fall
Why would I underestimate
When you got me backed against a wall
You never see me smile
We're both in denial
That's why I'm letting go this time
I am gonna leave you without crying
Gonna forget you without trying
This time I know it's gonna be easy
I can live without you it won't kill me
I might miss all the times we kissed
But it's not enough to make me stay
You lied to me like you lied to yourself
I hope you find the truth out there someday
You never see me smile
We're both in denial
That's why I'm letting go this time
I am gonna leave you without crying
Gonna forget you without trying
This time I know it's gonna be easy
I can live without you it won't kill me
I wanna believe you but it's impossible
I wanna believe you when you say you'll change
I wanna believe that things will get easier
I wanna believe you but you'll never change
Reason is over now
Credence has been lost
Frozen, my time is now
Broken is my soul
Even though, I can't seem to stay away
So much more has to be seen and will go my way
You've taken all I wanted
You've taken all I needed
Drown my fear and anxiety
Never hear what you say to me
Bleeding my wound won't close
Ending and yet so close
Tears left dripping at all costs
Fists clenched tight, ready for war
When we fight we must prevail
Where is my place in life?
Why can't I get it right?
Tell me what I'm going through.
Where are we going to turn to?
You feel alone I feel abused.
Tell me what are we supposed to do, suffer?
Reach out your hands to me
I understand you because I feel the same
It won't go away
This pain will never go away
I see it in your eyes.
You cannot hide your faces.
You're going through it too.
Where are we going to turn to?
You feel alone I feel abused.
Tell me what are we supposed to do, suffer?
[Chorus]
It's building up inside I know I've had enough
1, 2, 3 blow it up!
You feel alone I feel abused.
We share the same pain.
I know there's one thing we can do
And that's fight together and get away
Let's start with me
Write a list, pick out everything
Underline all my fine points
While still treating this like a disease
Can't you see this is part of me
It's everything that you want to be
So stay with me, stick through everything
And then you'll see it's all that you thought it would be
This is only a test run
Just look around: you'll see nothing has changed
This has not even begun
The way you're acting is simply insane
Let's start with you
Here's my list – wouldn't change a thing
Tried defining my fine points
To become what you want me to be
I can't believe you could look at me
And find a way to destroy my dream
It's hard to see when you're in front of me
So take a leave and watch this be all this can be
So please stay
Cause I know that you need me
And you'll follow me into the fame
So I hope you can trust me
And do your best not to put out the flame
Cause this isn't about me
It's about what I want us to gain
Cause you know you're the only
If only I hadn't kept it inside
If only you'd hear me plead
If only I could bring myself to tell
If only I could understand my side
But now, it all washed away
What you felt no longer an emotion
When we had been left behind
If only we'd speak out mind
When you move too slow it comes back to haunt you
To haunt you, takes over all you see in your eyes
And when you look back it seems so faded
One more time it's slipping through your fingers
And no longer within your reach
You waste your time on anyone who listens to you
You cry on every shoulder
First in line to every disappointment
It's so sad it affects your speech
But don't decline it's simply part of growing
One day you'll learn to
Find a way to try and stick with this
Don't lose it – clench it with your fist
Bring it with you
You don't have to use it but please don't lose it
One more time you're sorting through your options
But your limits are all you see
So take your time – this isn't going anywhere
You'll see it grows with patience in you
Will let you get to sleep the night through
Don't let it make you toss and turn if
You have to let it go
One day you'll learn to
It's pushing you back
Don't ever give up your hope
Try not to react
Opinions are on their own
You cry on every shoulder
I've been yearning for quite some time to make this mine
Ninety-five percent of times I've been right between the lines
Pessimistic ways may be so close to right
Something deep within me makes me wanna fight
To speak of this makes tears run down my eyes
I'm scared like you, cause I'm the only one who tries
I'm growing sick – tired of these endless nights
I look to them and say
I'm doing just fine in my room, feeling this wound
But this I'll take with me to my tomb
I don't understand what I do with these hands
They just sit there and stare and shatter my plans
I've been having no sleep, it seems like endless nights
If it happens one more time, in her I will confide
I'm about to crack without a sound – I think I'm breaking down
Feeling so alone, spending too much time on my own
Facing my own skin has been so hard to bear
To face what's deep within begins to make me scared
Walking away makes me feel much better
About my mistakes, it makes me feel so clever
Watching this break, what would it take
For you to look into my eyes
I'll wake you up when it's all over
Keep a straight face, pretend I'm sober
Pretend I'm fine – I'm out of my mind
I'll pick you up when you fall over
Being your crutch I'll be your motor
I'll push you forward
I'll stay here
Lost in this ocean
Without you I can't swim
And the water makes my head spin
And sink
Talking this way makes you look much better
Efforts so fake, you make me wait for ever
Saying what you say, the words you play
Move on
Free me from this life that I've thrown away
I'm torn
In between what I want and what's best for me
I'm lost
In this dream that no longer exists for me
And I can leave
But this place
Will remain in my mind for ever till I
Break from these chains
Take away this feeling
Lost without a clue when I'm well aware
In circles
Running round in search of a better me
And I can leave
Nothing can keep this from burning out and fading away
Taking time to figure out
To figure out what's running through your head
Everything you said, everything you did
What really got to me I'll never forget
What it is that broke me
And pulled me down and watched me bleed
Wasting time neglecting doubt
My stomach stops to hear my heart shout
To hear my thoughts out, to ease my pain
I'm sick of telling this old tale
To any ear that's open
I'd tell it all to you again
But I've already spoken
And I don't know how
You can say it's overrated
I'm so frustrated
And I can't stand how
You make me feel my life's been wasted
My faith is shaded
Waking up and handing out
Handing out a welcoming
To everything you were, to everything you prefer
What really hurt the most were the
Secrets that you kept beneath your skin
What they were, I never knew
Till the day they made me plead
Breaking all respect without
Explaining what you're really about
To let your thoughts out, to ease my pain
I'm sick of feeling that I've failed
The course that never opened
You're choosing to be crawling through
When you know you should be walking
Bleed
When it hurts
When it rips my heart in two
Don't leave me here, locked in this cold cell
It feeds my fear and it doesn't feel too well
It pulls me apart while it makes my pain swell
It beats down on me and throws me to the edge
Where I fell down and landed on the ground beside you
You've gotta roll over
Head off my shoulder
Gotta start over
Release
Don't shed a tear; turn my life to hell
Don't let your anger stir or let your bitterness repel
It rips through my heart where my emotions still dwell
It beats down on me and throws me to the ledge
Where I stopped, cause I knew that I would never jump off with you
You didn't want to make it last
You thought it would never surpass
The only dream I wish I had
So you chose just to let me collapse
I'll pick it up and try again
While removing this blade from my back
Take a moment to look back where it started
When everything you take for granted
Is everything that keeps you stranded here
Take a moment to look back where it fell through
When it was not so scary
Just temporary
Now that's over
Now everything you ever wanted has been pushed aside
You're face down – broken glass
Waiting for this time to pass
Reckless and underclassed
Hoping this will never last
Feeling dormant, struggling inch by inch
Breaking open; watch me give in again
See the cut up hands of this broken man
Weighing me down, but
Weakened knees; I'm trembling
Pushed aside; I'm failing
Wipe this sweat from my brow
I'm still waiting here
When you left, my heart came along
Nothing mattered I couldn't stay strong
You were a part of me for so long
What you left behind were memories, memories
And I never got to say goodbye
You'll always be a part of me
I still miss you to this day
I always took it all for granted
Never thought it would end this way
As I look back, I clearly remember that day
Every day
I wish you hadn't gone away
My heart is empty without you
I still miss you to this day
When the lights dim for me, you'll be there too
What was meant for you was meant for me too
All this loneliness I hold up inside
When it's all you sold to me
What it was and what I used to be
On the days when it rained
So ashamed at how we'd be
TV watching's got me switching stations
And chasing dreams
To evolve we must elevate
Read... now tell me
So who would want to live for ever
So who would want to live for days
Space and entity collide
To move on we must first understand
What we do and why we do it
What it was all you sold to me
What it was and what I used to see
On the days when it rained
So ashamed at how we'd be
TV watching's got me switching stations
And chasing dreams
I will never be
See all that's been happening