Could Maidenhead’s fair maidens tempt me to join Theresa's crew? LIZ JONES visits the PM's constituency
I’m in a leafy car park in Sonning, just outside Maidenhead in Berkshire. If I didn’t know already that this is Theresa May’s constituency (she was selected in 1997), I could have guessed. It’s just so nice. It’s Mary Berry country: all big houses in tiny plots behind electric gates.
Theresa May’s village reminds me of Beverly Hills, stuffed with rich people (I spot three Bentleys and a Range Rover convertible) with few worries. Unlike me.
I’ve arrived with the weight of the world on my shoulders: I’m a small businesswoman with no pension, no safety net, no husband. I’ve lost my home, and am now renting.
![Sonnings, Theresa May's home village, pictured, reminds me of Beverly Hills](http://web.archive.org./web/20171207024132/http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2017/04/23/01/3F81CFB800000578-4436418-image-a-18_1492906627121.jpg)
Sonnings, Theresa May's home village, pictured, reminds me of Beverly Hills
To borrow Mrs May’s oft-touted phrase, I’m ‘just about managing’.
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I voted Tory last time, but can’t decide how to vote next. I’m poor, so should I vote Corbyn? I voted Remain, so hard Brexit terrifies me. Could the Lib Dems tempt me to protest?
Perhaps the maidens of Maidenhead can reassure me that the Tories deserve to keep my vote, or are they living in cloud-cuckoo-land, lulled by rich husbands, masses of equity and a boring leader with no real new ideas?
Initial impressions are not encouraging. The car park is stuffed with SUVs.
Inside each is a well-manicured mum, waiting for her infant to be disgorged from the C of E primary school, and each one is on her smartphone.
I tap on a window. Are you reading about what Jeremy Corbyn said this morning, about wealth extractors?
‘It’s not that I don’t care,’ says the mum of two. ‘I’m just not that interested in politics. Who knows what’s going to happen? I’m bored with the Election already. It will make no difference to me. I’ve even turned off Facebook.’
But it’s only been 48 hours! This is about your children’s future!
The woman, a tax consultant, adds a surprising insight. ‘Maybe she called the Election because she doesn’t want to be there. Maybe she wants someone else in power.’
Can she stand up to Trump? ‘I don’t know if she’s enough. But I’d rather it was her than anyone else.’
I move to another car. A pretty 42-year-old mum of two tells me, ‘She’s a lovely lady. Everyone here loves her. Look…’
She holds up her phone, stuffed with joyous messages about play dates, worlds apart from my own emails about tax owing, VAT due. ‘My friend lives in her road, and we went to an Easter egg thing, and Mrs May joined in. But politics doesn’t impact on my life.’
What does she do? ‘I work in a school. I’ll probably vote for her. But she could relate to me more if she was a mum.’
Another car, another opinion. I meet Beth, a dead ringer for Geri Halliwell, who tells me she’s 46, with her own beauty therapist business, and an 11-year-old son. What does she think of Mrs May? ‘She’s very engaging.’
![It’s just so nice. It’s Mary Berry country: all big houses in tiny plots behind electric gates](http://web.archive.org./web/20171207024132/http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2017/04/23/01/3F81CFFD00000578-4436418-image-m-20_1492906707240.jpg)
It’s just so nice. It’s Mary Berry country: all big houses in tiny plots behind electric gates
Does she think the fact the Tories were going to punish the self employed with a hike in National Insurance was unfair? ‘No, I don’t. We should all contribute.’
I move to the school gates. What a nice life, knocking off at half three to pick up a child. But then I spot a depressed-looking woman, her daughter’s hand in hers.
‘I’m having a bad day,’ she tells me. It turns out she’s a 48-year-old single mum of two who works in a school and feels she gets no help at all. Oooh, I say, sniffing blood. Are you ‘just about managing’? Do you want change?
‘I get penalised by all of them. They make it hard. If I work more hours, my working tax credits are cut. I can’t win. But I will still be voting for May. They’re as bad as each other.’
Even in Maidenhead, when you scratch the glossy veneer, there are plenty of women struggling.
But not one I speak to is even contemplating Labour; I see only one pro-Left poster in a window, which states, ‘Tory Brexit will make you poor’.
Take a glamorous 50-year-old mum of children aged 29, 27, 22, 20 and ten I encounter. ‘They all still live with me. And my mum and my stepdad have just moved in, too.’ How lovely! That must be nice.
‘Nice! My parents have health problems, and I always said I would look after them. So I’m now a carer, and I don’t get any allowances. All I get is money off the TV licence.
‘My children have no hope of a home of their own. I have to cook for everyone!’
![I’d arrived from my home in the frozen, impoverished North wanting to tip all these rich southerners out of their cosy lives.](http://web.archive.org./web/20171207024132/http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2017/04/23/01/3F81CFC800000578-4436418-I_d_arrived_from_my_home_in_the_frozen_impoverished_North_wantin-a-22_1492906804253.jpg)
I’d arrived from my home in the frozen, impoverished North wanting to tip all these rich southerners out of their cosy lives.
Do they talk politics at home? ‘My son, who’s in a rock band, is very political, he has issues he’s concerned about [and he feels] no one’s helping him.
‘My youngest is diabetic, so he’s concerned about health. They all want to move out.’ How will they ever do that? ‘I will have to sell up, move to Devon.’
So is she tempted to vote Labour? ‘No.’ But you say Theresa May isn’t helping you. ‘Give her time! She’s not had a chance!’
In the bar of the trendy Great House hotel I meet Elloise Tarrant and April Hollamby. They are both 21, and have been friends since primary school. Elloise is a beauty therapist in a local spa.
Did she vote in or out? ‘I didn’t vote. I didn’t know enough about it.’ How will she vote on June 8? Does she care her PM is a woman?
‘That’s so silly! It’s a good thing, but that won’t influence how I vote. I still live with my parents.
‘I love living at home, but I’m most concerned about being able to buy a house.
‘I have a friend who managed it, she says it’s possible.’
Our waitress is studying dentistry in Plymouth, home for her vacation. She tells me she sees George Clooney all the time. She points in the direction of his mansion; this part of the Thames was described by Jerome K Jerome as ‘the most fairy-like little nook on the whole river’. He got that right, but as in most fairy tales there’s darkness, too: the Cinderallas with menial, low-paid jobs whose only hope of owning a house is to snare a prince.
Is she resentful Clooney lives in a mansion, and she can’t buy a home here, where even a small new-build is £400,000.
‘Oh no, it’s lovely he’s here. All my friends are jealous!’
At the other end of the age spectrum I meet a retired teacher – a natural candidate for a Left-leaning liberal, I imagine.
Nope. Another Tory. ‘I’m really pleased to see more is being done about young people with mental health issues, and that we might see more grammar schools.’
So you’re not considering Labour? ‘No, I don’t like Corbyn. May will fight for us.’
The maidens of Maidenhead aren’t voting for May just because there’s no alternative, or because she’s a neighbour, or a woman. They think she’s decent, stable.
Have they helped me make up my mind? I’d arrived from my home in the frozen, impoverished North wanting to tip all these rich southerners out of their cosy lives.
But it turns out no one’s ever quite as cosy as they might seem.
And May is like me in many ways: a grammar school girl who’s worked hard all her life. Like her, I don’t have children, but I do have nieces, nephews.
I can no longer dream of a bigger house, but I can still think of the bigger picture. As the PM sails towards a thumping victory, I’m not going to rock the boat.
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