The fact that our kids are open to being cyberbullied – that is, being victims of any bullying online – is one of the scariest parts of modern parenting.
Frankly, it's only right that we take this seriously. New research indicates that cyberbullying has increased by 60 per cent in the past year.
Tim Falinski, consumer director for Trend Micro (who make parental control devices), says it's a real concern because of its facelessness. "A lot of cyberbullying is often done anonymously, which makes it harder to act on than face-to-face bullying," he says.
While the temptation is to lock our kids up in a tall (wifi-free) tower, the reality is that we can take some far less drastic actions to keep them safe.
1. Restrict access (and there are ways to do this easily)
It's a good idea to restrict the times that your child is able to access the internet.
"Parents think the only solution they have is to tell the kids they can't take their devices into their bedroom at night," Falinski says. "But (there are solutions that) turn the devices off during set hours – this means you don't have to have those arguments every night."
For those in their pre-teen or early teen years, it's also vital to restrict the sites they can get to.
"You can set a profile for your child (on parental control devices)," says Falinski. "You can block them from sites, or you can get notified of the websites they're visiting."
2. Know what's right for your child's age and stage
While you might sit with your nine-year-old when they access the internet, and then block various types of websites when they're twelve, that isn't going to cut it with your sixteen-year-old.
"Pre-teens and teens need to be treated differently when it comes to being online," says Falinski. "As they get a bit older you have to move from blocking things and protecting them, to simply being aware of what they're doing."
3. Put off social media for as long as you can
Many experts suggest waiting until your child is at least 13 years of age before allowing them to open social media accounts. Any younger than this, they may struggle to deal with the things they might see or the cyberbullying that they could experience.
Social media opens up a whole new world, and there's a lot of groundwork to put in before launching your child into that world.
The Raising Children Network advises talking through various cyberbullying scenarios with your child ahead of time, to give them an idea of what could happen and how to deal with it.
4. Balance offline and online time
Research (and common sense) tells us that having strong relationships with friends and family 'in real life' (offline) is great for our kids' mental health.
And if your child finds themselves in a cyberbullying situation, it's those connections that enable them to talk it through, and re-establish their sense of worth in the world.
Balancing out your child's time online with activities, time together, and sports can make all the difference.
5. Keep communication open
Perhaps one of the most important parts of parenting is constant communication.
When in doubt, just keep listening to your child and offering them support.
"Don't make your kids feel bad for telling you the stuff that's happening online," suggests Falinski. "If your kid is being cyberbullied, you want them to feel it's safe to tell you rather than dealing with it alone."