Don't faint, but the Silver Cross Heritage Collection is finally here! Image: silvercross.com.au
Stop what you're doing! We have a very important public service announcement.
Silver Cross has branched into the lucrative market of children's toys. Yes, you heard that right. Earlier this week, the official supplier of prams to the Royal Family released a toy version of their ultimate vintage pram which is just what the pampered dolls of Australia have been silently screaming out for.
'How much?' you ask...?
One of these Silver Cross Heritage Dolls Prams can be yours for the bargain basement price of just $799! Whoops, I think I just wet my French lace designer lingerie with excitement.
Why your indulged infant NEEDS this toy
Silver Cross says, “while some of the practicality of the full-sized pram can be prohibitive in small houses and cars, these little models offer the perfect compromise - you can still have that iconic pram, and your little one won’t outgrow it."
That's absolutely wonderrrrful darrrling, because if I'm forking out $800 for a toy pram, I'm not sure I could afford a car ... or a house for that matter. Date nights will be a thing of the past. But hey, at least my little schnookums would have a super special toy pram to park outside of our cardboard box. After all, it's all about the image.
Image over dinner on the table. We certainly have our priorities in order, darrrrlings.
But let's be honest.
If I bought one of these pretentious prams, you can rest assured that my daughter would be pushing that thing to high school in the year 2027!
And that might be her reality too. Because nothing promotes teen pregnancy like an overpriced pram to practice on.
Oh the luxury ride for old Ted!
Silver Cross boasts a "Class C-spring suspension for the ultimate Silver Cross ride". These prams also have hand-stitched detail, shimmering hood and apron, some complete with "satin darted cushion with organza trim". Phew! I can sleep well tonight!
The skanky-looking povo dolls at our place are lucky to have clothes on their backs, so I'm not quite sure they would be entirely appreciative of such luxury features. Perhaps it is something we could instil in them. Does anyone know where I can find a reputable Finishing and Deportment School for toys in Western Sydney? I have a doll called Ella who doesn't like to wear pants and a bear imaginatively named Ted who enjoys his spare time between the sheets.
Oh and if you're not quite on the verge of bankruptcy over a child's toy, you might want to check out the accessories. There's the must-have Chrome Shopping Tray available for the small sum of $99, Changing Bag also at $99, and you could probably guess the Sun Canopy will set you back another $99.
But it's all worth it if your child could look this exquisite as she's rocking Dolly to sleep up and down the sprawling pebbled driveway that leads to your cardboard box.
Suddenly the $9 Kmart stroller I bought for my daughter's doll last week seems like the Datsun of doll's prams. I am such a terrible, terrible mother. What ever what I was thinking?
