This was published 7 years ago
Dear Jess: Should I say something to a colleague about their personal hygiene?
By Jessica Rowe
Q. I am a caring, mature female manager with a talented early-20s male employee who at times wears well-worn work shirts with underarm stains. Should I say something?
A. Thoughtful Boss, matters of personal hygiene and grooming are always tricky to handle politely. While I was on work experience in a regional TV station I recall being told by an equally caring manager that my short dresses and shiny, opaque stockings were more suited to a nightclub than a newsroom.
Should I mention the stains on a colleagues shirt?Credit: Stocksy
I appreciated being taken aside quietly and kindly advised about what was appropriate attire. Perhaps you could have a private meeting with your employee?
Compliment him on his excellent work and then offer some helpful solutions to his personal grooming. Even fib a little and admit that you needed help when you began your career. And maybe end the meeting with a gift pack of chocolates, antiperspirant and a Target catalogue. They have a good range of men's cotton shirts.
Jessica Rowe answers your questions.Credit: Damian Bennett
Q. I forgot to go to a friend's dinner party – until she rang me, by which time it was too late. She was furious as there were other guests. I apologised and sent flowers the next day but she has been very distant ever since. How can I fix this?
A. Forgetful Friend, I feel your pain. I wonder if your brain is a little like mine – good at the big picture, but struggles to hold onto the details.
One of my least proud moments was forgetting my darling mother's birthday one year, and it took time for me to heal her hurt over my thoughtlessness.
Unfortunately, there's no quick fix. Be patient, keep sending her messages and consider buying an old-fashioned diary to write down important dates – my mum's birthday is in permanent marker in mine.
Contact me via Jessica.Rowe@fairfaxmedia.com.au. Instagram: @jessjrowe. Twitter: @JessRowe.
These answers are simply my views, and I am far from perfect. I struggle through some days better than others with the help of my family, cats, chocolate and antidepressants. Unfortunately, I cannot personally reply to questions.