Freedom Cruise Update: The 70

The first evidence emerges that Ezra Levant's "Freedom Cruise" is not an elaborate hoax.  Through the link given at bottom you can see the uncropped version of this shot, with Ezra himself and FrackNation co-director Magdalena Segieda visible to the right.

Lets analyze what we can see here a bit, shall we:

Minus Ezra and Magdalena,  I count 70 people in this, the ship's theater of the Holland America Line's ms Zuiderdam. My count includes special guests John Robson and Patrick Moore, visible towards the back.  Also, from the flaming hairdoo, I suspect that the dark, standing figure rear-center is Brian Lilley.  These people can be fairly described as Ezra's personal "base", his acolytes.

Note that the facial expressions are, generally speaking grim.  The audience has just seen FrackNation, and has been informed that the second half of the double-bill will be Atlas Shrugged, Part I.  A few of  them are probably praying for death right about now.

And speaking of proximity to death, note also that, generally speaking, this crowd is...how shall I put it...not too mobile. They won't be leading a conservative revolution any time soon, unless their walkers come with a jet-pack attached.

FrackNation's recent "High Seas Premiere" on Freedom Cruise hosted by @ezralevant of @SunNewsNetwork http://t.co/aYiCRxFyKk | @msegieda Q&A
— FrackNation (@FrackNation) August 6, 2013

PS.  Picture can be seen better if you click on it.

Have You Ever Been To Sea, Billy? A Freedom Cruise Update

Just a brief note.

Coming up on their August 3rd sail date, the twitter feeds of Ezra Levant, Brian Lilley, Monte Solberg, and other Freedom Cruise "celebrities" have gone dark.  These folk are either on the move, or it went bust and Ezra has sworn them to silence.

But I am inclined to think its a go.  The Holland America Line's ms Zuiderdam seems to host these kinds of gathering on a regular basis.  Or at least, the same day Ezra's crowd boards, a tour led by Hot Air's Ed Morrissey disembarks. They'll probably pass one another on the gangway.  Maybe a slappy fight breaks out, and specs get busted.

And maybe the Zuiderdam has special facilities, a sealed-off spot way below deck, kind of like the wing of your old high-school where they housed the slow kids, which in my old high-school we referred to as "The Auk Hall".

So Ed vacates, the place gets hosed down, and Ezra and Co. come aboard.  Presto!  The Freedom Cruise is on its way.

Freedom Cruise Update!

With not much happening in Ottawa these days, I thought I'd check in on the state of Ezra Levant's Freedom Cruise.  And the news is...its still sucking.  But in a slightly different way:

Wildrose leader Danielle Smith has also scraped [sic] her original summer plans, including a weeklong Alaska “Freedom Cruise” organized by Sun News host Ezra Levant, to focus on the disaster recovery in High River, part of her Highwood constituency.

No worries though, true believers, the Universe remains in balance.  For while the leader of Alberta's official opposition and possible one day premier is out, she has been replaced by...some guy that used to be an MP!  Yes, Monte Solberg, once "ranked...as one of the top three best speakers and most effective questioners in the House of Commons".  No doubt he'll speak of the day he left Paul Martin speechless, though in fact it turned out Martin had left his speech in the glove-box of his car.

Fun times!

Sarah Palin Guest On Ezra Levant's Freedom Cruise?

No.  Almost certainly not.  Its still just these losers:

The "crazy 8", as I like to call them.  But its another slow news day and I wanted to spike this rumor before it got too far.

Ezra Levant's Freedom Cruise Update: Tips For Travelers

As you know, last year Ezra Levant and the Sun News Network arranged a "Freedom Weekend" up in Muskoka for big-C Conservative zealots.  Since nobody who signed up for that trip has ever spoken ill of it, or even been seen again, Ezra and the gang have decided to try again with a 7-day excursion up the West Coast to Alaska.  A "Freedom Cruise", as they are calling it.  Ezra and co. have even provided a nice FAQ for potential cruise-goers.  I shall reproduce a few of the Q/As below, along with my comments and interpretations:

What to wear

[...]

For this cruise, you will want very casual and comfortable wear during the day. This means slacks, shorts, T-shirts and sweatshirts as well as comfortable walking/hiking shoes. In general you should dress moderately on shore and save the dressy clothes for the ship.

Translation: no fashion showboating in front of the locals.  In  Alaska its dark half the year, and they need a human sacrifice to prepare for sunrise  Also, some of the oil rig workers up there haven't seen female flesh in a yonks.  If you don't want to get yourself killed, gang-raped, and eaten, pretend you're in Saudi Arabia.  This applies to the guys too.  Maybe especially.

Correspondence

All future correspondence will go to the address on your confirmation. Address changes must be received in writing. There is a booking number on your confirmation. Please write this number on all certified checks. It is helpful to include your ship and sail date on any correspondence. A good daytime phone number and email address is important if we need to reach you about your booking. Any changes in your reservation including category, number of people in cabin, names in cabin, additions & deletions to cabin, etc, MUST be received in WRITING.

Translation:  WE will call You.  Don't YOU call US.  And when you are speaking to our guy, Raoul, you may hear street noises.  That's because our booking office is at ground level, not because our agent  moon-lights as a cab drive.

General Cruise Notes

If you consider your cruise ship a floating resort that transports you from one port to another as an added bonus, everything will be placed in proper perspective. If you feel naked without your diamonds and emeralds, or a lot of cash on hand, then bring them along. 

Translation: We've got a poker game, and you are invited!  The big boss Kory's telling us that  $17,000,000 a year in losses can be made back right quick with a ship full of suckahs.  That's plan B if the CRTC doesn't come through.

Ezra Levant's Freedom Cruise: I Sense A Disaster Of Hysteric Proportions

Last year,  the Sun News Network managed to con a few pathetic souls into forking out $1,050 for a $400 weekend up in Muskoka, the extra cash bestowing the privilege of hanging with the likes of Ezra and Brian Lilley.  Here's a picture from Sunday morning, as the guests attempted to escape into the surrounding forest:

Apparently none of them got out alive, or at least nobody has been willing to speak of  this "Freedom Weekend" in the months since.

Now Ezra and the gang have dreamed up a sequel that is even more fiendishly evil--a whole week on a boat with Ezra, Brian Lilley, and Pam Geller who, lets face it, is not as hot as she once was.  Imagine seven days in a dentist's chair, and then throw in sea-sickness to boot.

Personally, I can see no strategy that would get me through such a week.  Drinking every night until the darkness claims you--like you do with the in-laws at Xmas--might work, but a lot of those cruise companies make it hard to smuggle booze to you cabin, and charge 7$ or 8$ for a rum and coke.  So achieving the peace of unconsciousness each night would be an expensive proposition.  This being Alaska, I suppose you could end it all by throwing yourself on the horn of a passing Narwhal...

In any case, the date is early August, and if the CRTC refuses to give Sun News mandatory carriage in April, it may be all over by then.  Your ticket money might wind up paying for Ezra's bus back to Lethbridge.  I sense, therefore, that this "Freedom Cruise" will eventually disappear beneath waves of misadventure, and sink to the very bottom of the Flop Sea.