i lost the feeling in my hands again and it was right when i started touching different shirts and shit i wanted whilst shopping and it fully pissed me off and took the fun out of everything if i can’t feel what the fabric feels like then wtf!? i bought a hoodie anyway and underwear and a new hat and four cds here are the cds i bought

the new flaming lips
the new beck
bjork vespertine (someone fucking stole my last copy you know who you are)
travis, singles (i sold mine before i went to nyc cos i’m a genius)

i just “designed” my beck cover/s it wasn’t that fun cos again i can’t feel anything and it took way longer than it should have i am probably going to kill someone cos i am so angry about my loss of touch and my lips are very chapped and i am starving and i am not drinking anymore and now i get to watch fil shop FUN !!!!!!

all i ate today was a bite of two day old pizza so if someone were to sneeze the wrong way near me right now i would pull all their hair out most likely.

i can’t wait for fil to get home he got me a RING!

mikey trying to get laid

i was thinking about your story last night when i was getting fucked up. larry is your only character that is not based on someone you know, but he is like the part of you that even you do not want people to know. am i wrong? -sabrina

well yer close
ive always wanted to be a ridiculously rich piss tank eccentric nut -raymi

the part that made me think it was, was the testing. you’re the type to test people.

um no im not
i fucking hate people who do that
i dont have the capacity to care enough over whether people like me for me or not
i really dont care
as long as theyre there to listen and do what i say they can be monkies it doesnt matter

no one wants it!? ok i am throwing it away last chance!

to add more flare to our tasty celebration dinner out last nite fil decided a portrait of me was imperative. how sweet of him to capture the hair that grows out of my chin, totally enlarge my piercing, my wrinkles (i didn’t think i had wrinkles) and the gap in my teeth before i had one tooth filed down to even them both out, anyway I LOVE YOU TOO FIL!

my arm isn’t broken everyone i self-diagnosed it yep.

now i am going to blow a bunch of money on myself memememememe.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN YA’LL!

my arm really hurts i almost started crying when i put on a sweater fil said i should make a sling i am picturing wearing a sling in a park leaning against a tree writing poems about my sling with my left hand and leaves are blowing in the wind around me and then kids throw rocks at me cos i am a nerd loser with a sling and a dumb hat my aunt knitted or something i probably shouldn’t be typing either.

i also don’t know where my favorite chapstick is so my lips are drying up into nothing and i think about that chapstick at least every five minutes or so.

POEM ABOUT MY ARM*

MY ARM IS BUSTED I WILL RUB IT IN SOME MUSTARD THE WOUND IS OOZING CUSTARD I FEEL PRETTY FLUSTERED

*to be spoken in a boston accent so that busted rhymes with mustard.

here is a thank you for the queef article email:

Thank you for one of the hardest laughs I have had in a year or MORE!!! I almost coughed up a lung!

THANK YOU!!!!

we are celebrating our anniversary tonite so that we don’t have to drink tomorrow i have zero recollection of what the restaurant is called that we will be dining at but it is nearby and fancy and expensive and we have been planning to eat there since last december i am excited.

i smashed my elbow on the bathroom doorknob when i was towelling my hair there wasn’t a swear word sweary enough to say at the time so i just stared at myself in the mirror with my eyes all big and i wanted to punch myself in the face i was so mad.

does anyone else watch top chef at midnite on sundays on food tv like me do you want to talk about it? i might be watching repeats of the first season i don’t know but i am super into it last nite they had to make fancy meals using garbage from a gas station it was interesting and i hate how defensive and condescending they are which means i love this show. oh great i just found this article and i guess it’s now down to these two but i’m sort of glad i found it cos the dude is the super condescending one and the chick is the totally defensive one and i fucking hate them both so much.

**i think i might need an x-ray i just used the arm i elbow smashed to help myself up out of this chair and all the pain came back maybe i have a bone chip i am a fucking loser.

i wonder how much brain damage i have incurred as a result of drinking so much i just typed CLONGSPOT instead of blogspot well i guess i don’t have to wonder anymore.