i went to sushi on bloor and ate alone i ordered the sashimi bronze for ten bucks ten pieces but they give you 16 pieces? decent. i also got an unagi handroll. i had a four person table to myself which was nice until a slew of whimsical annex fuckfaces came in the door and told stories to each other loudly while i was finishing my meal and reading a homosexual crime novel (literally a book about gay gangsters i know i throw around GAY a lot and don’t mean it other than to describe something cheesy but this time i oh nevermind) and this little kid kept rattling the soya sauce bottle on my table wavering it around so i let him do it for thirty seconds before i SLAMMED my left hand hard on the table looked him in the eye and said CAN YOU STOP THAT he was maybe 8 so i felt especially brave, his mom wasn’t looking either HAHA eight year old. this dude saw it all go down and i felt like he mentally gave me a high-five after i did it and prior to that he was like i hate that little white devil.

a party of three teachers were leaning against the two chairs at my table too like it was fucking chat-central and they kept asking the waitress when a table would be ready and they sighed a lot and one told a story about her autistic grade ones and she acted out how one of them kept asking to go to the bathroom.

holy shit people i am drinking a fucking asahi at 5pm does it look like i want to listen to any words from anyone’s fucking mouth right now other than SAKE ARIGATO WASABI ASAHI SAPPORO?

i get that it’s annoying that i am taking up a four person table but it was dead when i got there and every other fucking loner white lady that came in after me asked for a booth or a bigger table and they got one why are you all picking on me it’s because i am beautiful right and closest to the door? maybe if you shut up so i don’t have to re-read the same fucking gay crime novel page ten times i can finish my meal quickly and get out of there so that YOU can waste everybody’s time, leisurely eating your bento box I HATE EVERYONE IN THE ANNEX WHITE PEOPLE ESPECIALLY EXCEPT FOR ME (and some people i know ok i only hate strangers)!! you are not allowed to act all breezy and nonchalant when really just under the surface you will lose your fucking mind if you have to wait two minutes for a table GO SOMEWHERE ELSE IF YOU CAN’T HANDLE WAITING. i’m sorry my eating here alone at this table and arriving before you personally offends you so much.

after that i went to that new nerd-central book store bmv whatever and bought two books and asked if they took books in exchange for cash/credit and they do and of course the dude had to tell me all this extra information about it that i didn’t wask for and he was wearing jogging pants.

then i bought leg warmers and some sunglasses.

bye.

oh fil just came home and brought me one of those iv bags of wine or more accurately a wine skin OR a maple syrup bag something with a little spout you don’t even need a glass HELLO LIVER PARTY!

he has to go away now to his dad’s then a work ski-trip thing so i am alone i rented a bunch of movies i will probably not go to that blogtv.ca thing but if you want to do something fun in lieu of then call me if not then i will just be wine-crying on the couch to match point.

more nyc this batch is brought to you by my little fugly hands

i have the best voice in the world

and now some words from my justin timberlake correspondent SHARPACHU who attended last nite’s concert:

justin timberlake aka my boyfriend forever in life

I think that the only thing I can really say to sum up the concert is: swoon.

I have no pictures. I have two horrible 7 second videos on my camera phone, but I don’t know how to send those to you. We had theee best seats ever, along the perimeter of the restaurant, with nice fancy chairs, and a waiter! We could just sit there, separated from the “regular folks” and watch the hottest guy ever dance and sing. I know that all of us at the end of it had a lot more love for JT.

I think that’s it. Would I spend that ridiculous amount of money on the show again? Yes! Would I pay even more? Um totally.

Oh wait, one more thing, do you remember being 10 years old and reading Tiger Beat and falling ridiculously painfully in love with someone (for me it was Johnny Depp when he was in 21 Jump Street). So you put the photos/posters up in your room of Johnny and you spend an obscene amount of time pining for him, wondering what it would be like to kiss him, wishing that you could just meet him one day because he would totally want to marry your 10 year old being if.he.just.met.you.? That was what the feeling was like last night watching Justin.

Swoon.

-ES.

HARRY FUCKING POTTER!!?!?!!! very weird. parents are pissed about it. whatever he’s growing up and not going to have that fucking lightning bolt on his forehead forever get over it.

shocking blue, venus

we hung out with these guys last nite at c’est what with sean it was fun they are cool they have a show on friday at o’grady’s and while that particular venue seems a bit off they sold me on it, i am looking forward to wasted university tools and hipsters dancing, united as one.

when we showed up sean was having a “business meeting” with leviride so fil and i pulled a mrs. doubtfire and sat across the room at our own table and stared at sean through a fish tank until it was too weird and he called us over though by then fil and i were playing pool, he lied and said he wasn’t very good at it. before that we ate i had chicken tikka masala and fil ordered a lamb burger BUT they brought him a bison burger instead, i had a bite and was um uh this does not taste like lamb, it has an after-taste not unlike lamb but it’s way dry and well, eh, thinking about it now my empty stomache is roller-coastering.

what else.

bob asked what we did for scracth, fil gave his adult job description i just said i talk a lot of shit, basically — he had previously made a blog joke so it was funny that i got to say yeah well i blog. i’d rather say i do nothing, i fringe.

i was just watching this look-a-like show and they got some dude who looks like johnny depp and they made him look even more like johnny depp and now i am jealous that i do not look like johnny depp. it has however inspired me to draw him, some horny bitch will buy my huge johnny depp canvas, surely. i’m not sure WHICH johnny depp to do though, jack sparrow is definitely OUT don’t go there. please advise.

one more thing i like the emily haines & the soft skeleton album, and i know i’ve mentioned before my disdain for her, i know it’s not cos of jealousy, i just realised i hate her for the same reasons i hate myself.

cid is in love with the essence of my being right now he is in my arms kneading at the air purring hornily trying to be as close to me as possible and his huge rabbit-like feet keep pushing the laptop away from me i made the mistake of looking at him a few minutes ago and went PSS PSSS psss i know this love-fest will soon turn sour and it will be time-out for cid. though i might go back to bed and watch tv. i had to get up to make sure i wrote BIASED instead of UNBIASED in my last post, damage control. my back-up plan was going to be resorting to sticks and stones hurling ie I WAS BEING SARCASTIC YOU FUCKS.

UPDATE CID IS NOW A PURRING SNORING DONUT IN MY ARMS.

i am putting final fantasy’s has a good home on itunes the end i think it is better than he poos clouds.

oh and rented vice’s guide to travel it was finally in at queen i have it for the week and it comes with a little book to read. it’s pretty amazing you will shit in your pants if you are a scrawny little mama’s boy or something so watch it.

this guy wrote a top ten canadian bloggers list and lamented that there weren’t enough “smart” canadian female bloggers and now all these nerds are bandwagon-jumping offering up a ton of female bloggers and i noticed i was not included in the majority of those lists, and i’m not surprised. while it is the easy route to dismiss me and pass me off as NOT SMART it’s a cheap shot, for the most part.

before addressing and defending my intelligence honour i would like to point out how fucking pompous it is for all these dudes to state that the “The blogosphere is still a male-dominated thing” — that is quite a bold fucking statement to make, audacious and untrue, pot-stirring, deeming something fact when it isn’t. STILL? when was it EVER male dominated? sorry dude but i haven’t been living in a cave with my eyes stapled shut and my fingers in my ears for the last ten years so i do NOT recall the blogosphere or any fucking corner of the internet EVER being male-dominant. i have been blogging longer then all these fucks and from then up to now i have NEVER noticed an imbalance in blogging when it comes to gender, AND even IF there was, so what? why are they starting a gender war? oh ho ho we “noticed” there aren’t enough “smart” women blogging lets BLOG ABOUT IT. fuck you, losers.

here is the entire quote:

The blogosphere is still a male-dominated thing (for example, only 55 57 blogs out of 326 Prog Blog affiliates are women bloggers – roughly 17%), but that’s slowly changing, and quite honestly, the ones that are out there all write pretty darn well. You just have to take the time to look for them.

oh thanks for your totally fucking biased example, scott.

anyway, again, i’m not shocked at being ignored amongst these people’s lists, funny, i am suppose to be canada’s #1 blogger yet i’m not “smart” ? i didn’t know that if you wanted to be smart you had to acknowledge progressive media and politics and write boring dribble daily. lame.

with these people tooting their i am smarter than the rest of the blogosphere horns you’d think they would “get” my blog and that it is a mockery of intellect.

i am shunned because of all this “exposure” i receive, bitches whining about it WHAT’S SO GREAT ABOUT RAYMI WAAAH. ungh.

sorry i brought this up.

this is adorable:

dad at comedy barn

this will kill you.