blogging has been hard lately, i don’t think i have ever said that before other than after my nervous breakdown, and even then i didn’t say that, or maybe i did, all i could bring myself to blog was three sentences every two weeks or so. the last month (as christie stated on our hangover shopping spree) has been a drunken blur, if not for digital cameras and other person’s present i doubt i could remember any of it. next year i am taking a december hiatus and fucking off and fil gets zero presents. i’m pretty sure all the boozing and xmas partying on top of xmas partying is directly associated to my kidney pain. i can’t wait for the ultrasound techie to be like doo dee doo doo OHMYFUCKINGGOD THERE’S A FUCKING DINOSAUR WHERE YOUR KIDNEY USED TO BE!!

here is an example of how i blogged post-nervous breakdown. sad.

i feel like people are tired of me and my stupid stories so i made a point to just stop writing them down or remembering them altogether, i think it’s just a phase.

i’m just hyper-focused on my health right now and blogging every single thing some french stranger yelled at me on christmas eve seems inconsequential.

one good thing about funks is you come up with some good one-liner emo quotes, here’s one i’ve said over and over in my head since all this nausea pain began I’M NOT GOING TO LIVE VERY LONG AND YES I AM AFRAID TO DIE. now pretend you read that in rolling stone and it’s printed over a picture of me in a field holding flowers and a milk jug or something. see? gold i tell you.

happy new year.

this is pure garbage.

oh great MORE of them.

pitt needs this.

faeries are in right now.

mom i’m boooooored when are we going to mcdonald’s? here susan play with these until your dad gets home.

1 dollar necklace.

1 dollar nicole richie vacuum the house head thing.

presents from radmad i HATE roe.

fil’s present, i can’t help but feel that this is a dig at me.

cid hates art.

i bought new things!

two necklaces
four underwears
overall shorts
a shirt
a grey cardigan (now i have 4?)
three head wraps (bands?)

MEMEmemememememe!

leaving the hotel video.

and if you want to hang out tomorrow like a regular tuesday nite (for me/us, that’s a friday for you guys) email me mmmkay. not sure if it’s duane’s or tony’s hotel yet.

oh and i have zero resolutions so don’t ask, relying on the passage of time or a date to make changes in one’s life is stupid, how about just owning up to your shortcomings now, fat ass? oh once valentine’s day rolls around my life will be so much better. pfft. the only alteration to my lifestyle i foresee happening will be because of the results of a bloodtest i take for the pain i have recently been experiencing, not because a bunch of families from oshawa, mississauga and ajax will descend upon nathan phillips square to watch a fucking ball drop.

i wish i looked like a cabbage patch doll all the time too.

how to change the world.

look it’s that stupid kid (grey cardigan,right) who drags his mom out to bars and parties and other ridiculous shit in toronto and he’s only 12 or something. sad.

his poor mother, i wanted to go up to her son and say YOU’RE KILLING YOUR MOTHER but christie decided it was time for barfing.

christie‘s under there somewhere.

“missing” cds.

present fil picked out for duane, i wanted to get something cuter but according to fil GUYS LIKE STUFF THAT DO STUFF.

if you can believe it, duane’s drunk outshined pitt’s, we were stunned.

tony sucks as usual.

party pants showed up.

i have a video of duane doing sweet child o mine and it is BRUTAL he will probably kill himself if he sees it. i haven’t been able to watch it yet. i deleted the video of me doing jewel. last nite was so stressful for me i unleashed 5 separate crappings. did anyone at least get me doing oh darling?

this is a picture i looked at earlier and decided I AM BUYING A NEW DRESS but then fil made us steak and potatos and now i am wearing a t-shirt the size of the superbowl, and there is no new dress in sight. i am also on my period.

skipped out on the clinic, i’m feeling better and i do still have an ultrasound appt. soon so i’m hoping kidneys like, fix themselves?

i’m a horrible coward when it comes to these things.

we ate nachos twice yesterday and then chinese food for dessert. i can’t eat chinese food anymore (or as chinese people might say i can’t eat food anymore), the msg or whatever that magical stuff is just doesn’t sit well with me.

i am an old delicate flower.

christie barfed four times last nite.

new term: tampwn’d as in tampon + pwn’d (as in owned).

everybody wins.

example: richard was putting the moves on michelle all night long but she wasn’t really feeling it and too polite a girl to tell him to stop, once he manouvered her trousers off he soon realised he was tampwn’d. burn on richard.

so if some french guy says to me i am acting “so toronto” and then i counter with you are acting so french, how am i the racist one and he isn’t?

more later, my blood pressure just rose in typing out that sentence.

and this all began by me asking why he and this younger dude were arguing over rock paper scissors, and then i had to open my big mouth again and say well actually there is some skill involved, it’s not just chance or luck, you are reading the person and thinking two steps ahead of them and predicting what they are going to do, which then of course lead to an argument about separatism and this guy finally admitting that french people are really racist but before that i proved my point by 2 out of 3-ing this younger kid and beating him at rock paper scissors, to which frenchie calls my spiel bullshit and says i am acting very toronto, oh so cool, which i blew my top about and said he is so french which he exploded over of course and i said fuck off i’m half french don’t give me that defensive shit, oh man it got ugly, showertime.

french people are my new enemy, vancouver you are off the hook heh.

how about ok you’re not acting french, you’re just a fucking asshole?

FIL JUST FOUND ALL OF OUR “MISSING” CDS AND NOW HE IS CONCERNED ABOUT HIS SANITY I SLAPPED HIM FOUR TIMES AND PULLED DOWN HIS PANTS IM SO PISSED OMG DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY TIMES HE HAS DRIVEN ME NUTS ABOUT THESE FUCKING CDS AND THEY WERE IN THE NEW DRAWER CART HE BOUGHT FROM IKEA THIS ENTIRE TIME

meet duane the stain, here’s why:

hospital fil