- published: 22 Sep 2013
- views: 338121
Eldrick Tont "Tiger" Woods (born December 30, 1975) is an American professional golfer who is among the most successful golfers of all time. He has been one of the highest-paid athletes in the world for several years.
Following an outstanding amateur and two-year college golf career, Woods turned professional at age 20 in late summer 1996. By April 1997 he had already won his first major, the 1997 Masters in a record-breaking performance, winning the tournament by 12 strokes and pocketing $486,000. He first reached the number one position in the world rankings in June 1997. Through the 2000s, Woods was the dominant force in golf, spending 264 weeks from August 1999 to September 2004 and 281 weeks from June 2005 to October 2010 as World Number One.
From December 2009 to early April 2010, Woods took leave from professional golf to focus on his marriage after he admitted infidelity, but he and his wife Elin Nordegren eventually divorced. His many extramarital indiscretions were revealed by several different women, through many worldwide media sources. This was followed by a loss of golf form, and his ranking gradually fell to a low of No. 58 in November 2011. He ended a career-high winless streak of 107 weeks when he captured the Chevron World Challenge in December 2011. After winning the Arnold Palmer Invitational on March 25, 2013, he ascended to the No.1 ranking once again, holding the top spot until May 2014. Woods had back disc surgery in April 2014, and has struggled since to regain his dominant form. By March 29, 2015, Woods had fallen to #104, outside of the top 100 for the first time since the week prior to his first Tour title win in 1996.
Actors: Ric Young (producer), Harvey Lowry (producer), Jeffrey Giles (miscellaneous crew), Arnold Chun (producer), Michael Lurie (miscellaneous crew), Mighty Mike Murga (actor), Mighty Mike Murga (actor), Mighty Mike Murga (actor), Chanel Ryan (actress), Chris Pentzell (writer), Stephanie Danielson (actress), Chris Pentzell (actor), Stephanie Danielson (actress), Mike Nyman (actor), Britt Prentice (actor),
Genres: Comedy, Horror,Actors: Deon Richmond (actor), Michael C. Watkins (producer), Shauntay Hinton (actress), Steve Sirkis (actor), John Gilbert (actor), Herme Chua (actor), Kary Parks (actress), Xavier Green (director), Rachel Greene (actress), Steve Watkins (writer), Kris Campbell (actor), Xavier Green (producer), Steve Watkins (producer), Cailin Mendes (actress), Dwayne Colber (actor),
Genres: Comedy, Short,Actors: Eban Schletter (composer), Norman Lear (producer), Ralph Cole Jr. (actor), Ron Butler (composer), Ron Butler (actor), Ron Butler (writer), Ron Butler (director), Ron Butler (producer), Tohoru Masamune (actor), Sita Young (actress), Chris Dotson (actor), Jaylen Moore (actor), Teresa Huang (actress), Marilyn Rising (actress), Natalie O'Brien (costume designer),
Genres: Comedy, Drama, Musical, Short,Actors: Desmon Heck (actor), Ric Maddox (actor), Konstantin Lavysh (actor), Ingrid Clay (actress), Christina Maria Davis (actress), Holly Gagnier (actress), Elena Fabri (actress), Tony Calle (actor), Tony Dang (actor), Kelly Erin Decker (actress), Denise Carroll (actress), Elyté Salna (actress), Chris Davison (director), Chris Davison (writer), Leigh Ann Smith (actress),
Genres: Comedy, Music, Musical, Short,Actors: Larry Groupé (composer), Dean Cain (actor), Mark Maine (actor), Mark Maine (producer), Mark Maine (writer), Dean Cameron (actor), Jossara Jinaro (actress), Rico E. Anderson (actor), Veronica Alicino (actress), David H. Lawrence XVII (actor), Christopher Showerman (actor), Mark Melnick (editor), David Ellison (actor), Vida Maine (actress), Vida Maine (producer),
Plot: Eric, a highly-gifted golfer but radically-undisciplined college undergrad, finds his world drastically altered after losing a golf bet to a pair of sadistic plastic surgeons. Eric's bad-boy attitude lifestyle comes to a screeching halt as he loses his money, his girlfriend, his dignity and his golf swing. Eric and his best friend Tyler decide to take on the doctors, in a final golf match of "Best-Ball" to get his life back and become the man he should have been all along.
Keywords: ball, bet, black-humor, boy-with-glasses, college, college-student, female-nudity, girlfriend, golf, golf-ballActors: Lincoln Hoppe (actor), Tom Arnold (producer), Joe Hartzler (actor), Cooper Harris (actress), Jason Schmid (writer), Jason Schmid (director), Jason Schmid (editor), Jason Schmid (producer), Adam Harrington (actor), Adam Harrington (writer), Griffin Kohout (actor), Jake Bern (actor), Jake Bern (producer), Jake Bern (writer), Michael A. Reagan (composer),
Genres: Comedy,Actors: Donald Glover (actor), Lisa Goldberg (producer), James Weaver (producer), James Weaver (director), Theodore Bressman (writer), David Weaver (editor),
Genres: Comedy, Short,Actors: Breven Angaelica Warren (actress), Jeffrey A. Fisher (producer), Jeffrey A. Fisher (director), Stuart Rigby (actor), Jon Hotchkiss (producer), Joe Manuella (actor), Jessica Hughes (actress), Devin McGovern (producer), Zach Alden (actor), Joel Friedman (director), Teddy Valenti (producer), Pavel Sfera (actor), Lissa Negrin (actress), David Tittle (producer), Joe Richards (actor),
Genres: Comedy,Actors: Dennis Farina (actor), Quentin Tarantino (actor), Rokki James (producer), Rokki James (actor), Rokki James (director), Rokki James (writer), Desi Singh (actor), Matthew McGrory (actor), Craig Gellis (actor), Sofia Shinas (actress), Elias McCabe (actor), Celeste Octavia (actress), Shannon Fenady (actor), Jay Kruetzer (actor), Peter Tsadilas (producer),
Plot: First day on the job publicist Mark Clock has the assignment of a lifetime; to pick up A list Brad Beau Hodges (modeled after Brad Pitt) and while avoiding paparazzi, safely escort the celebrity to his own surprise birthday party in Malibu. The mission goes sour when Brad accidentally drinks a coke containing roach repellent at a Nuclear Power Plant located in Sun Valley, Ca. Bear (modeled after Kid Rock / power plant supervisor) suggests taking Brad to the nearest supermarket and purchase a laxative as an antidote for relieving Brad from his Planet of the Apes hallucinations caused by the poisoned soda. The two elect to stop at Mark's psychiatrist before the supermarket run. Dr. Rosenblum a psychiatrist who takes control of the situation by choosing to be the designated driver; only Rosenblum has his own plans and appoints to drive to the city of Compton to aid his crack addiction. In the heat of panic, Mark is accompanied with a strange entourage including a Pimp from the ghetto. The entourage escorts the delusional Brad to his surprise birthday party in Malibu. The real heat is laid on Mark when his psychiatrist lures a young make up artist named Fancy "24""Felicity" into a bedroom for sex and drugs. The makeup artist overdoses and now Mark's bizarre crew lead by Toto "Big Fish", "House of a Thousand Corpses" are on a mission to bury Fancy in the Barstow Desert. After the burial one of the most Bizarre situations ever captured in a motion picture will go down.
Keywords: character-name-in-title, independent-film, publicistActors: LeVar Burton (director), John Cho (actor), Spencer Garrett (actor), Ralph Berge (miscellaneous crew), Keith David (actor), Carey Scott (actor), Albert Hall (actor), John Colton (actor), Tom Walls (editor), Mark Carlton (actor), Chris Devlin (actor), Freda Foh Shen (actress), Diane Weiss (miscellaneous crew), Khalil Kain (actor), Richard Keats (actor),
Genres: Biography, Drama, Sport,
Tiger Woods first interview after sex affairs scandal
The golfer apologizes, promising to "start living a life of integrity."
John Daly gives his interesting take on Tiger’s scandal and sizes up other big names on the tour Want to see more? SUBSCRIBE to watch the latest interviews: http://bit.ly/1R1Fd6w Episode debuted nationwide in 2014. Watch full episodes each week on TV stations across the country. Find the airing time and channel for your city: http://www.grahambensinger.com/index.php/when-where-watch Connect with Graham: FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/GrahamBensinger TWITTER: https://twitter.com/GrahamBensinger INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/grahambensinger WEBSITE: http://www.grahambensinger.com/
Tiger Woods talked with ESPN's Tom Rinaldi for his first public interview since his November 2009 accident/scandal. Woods will return to professional golf at the Masters in early April. All credit goes to ESPN.com for the video. Follow me on Twitter! http://www.twitter.com/ethanculver
If you look back at his 2009 numbers, Subscribe and share for more great Tiger Woods videos! http://bit.ly/UnauthorizedStorySubscribe you can see that Tiger's endorsement deals have gone down from $92 million to $70 million. That's a decline of $22 million! Some of the sponsors he's lost include Gatorade, AT&T;, and Accenture. (At least he still has Nike.)
Steve Williams on the inability to escape the controversy of Tiger Woods’ infidelity, saying he was unaware of Tiger’s behavior despite their close personal and professional relationship, and that he understands why people may assume otherwise. Williams also says that he didn’t know Tiger as well as he thought and that their relationship deteriorated very quickly after news of the cheating scandal became public. Want to see more? SUBSCRIBE to watch the latest interviews: http://bit.ly/1R1Fd6w Episode debuted nationwide in 2011. Watch full episodes each week on TV stations across the country. Find the airing time and channel for your city: http://www.grahambensinger.com/index.php/when-where-watch Connect with Graham: FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/GrahamBensinger TWITTER: https://t...
The world number 1 golfer has announced his £155 million sponsorship deal with Nike with a new TV advert featuring Tiger Woods. In the new one minute advert McIlroy and Woods are captured on the driving range taking turns to hit some unlikely shots into a variety of different cups. No Cup Is Safe, the official name of the commercial, is due to air from Wednesday January 16 in the US. It marks the start of McIlroy's ten year sponsorship deal with the sports giant which is reported to be worth £155 million. Writing on Twitter the Northern Irishmen said he was "pumped" to have joined the Nike stable. Read more: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/sportvideo/9800864/No-Cup-Is-Safe-Rory-McIlroy-and-Tiger-Woods-in-new-Nike-golf-advert.html Get the latest headlines http://www.telegraph.co.uk/ S...
Original Tiger Woods Nike commercial. I'm Tiger Woods with all the little kids in the TV spot.
This is a supposedly unaired commercial of Tiger Woods!
See Tiger Woods’ reaction as he watches for the first time the PGA TOUR’s new “How Good Is That” TV commercial. #TheseGuysAreGood . SUBSCRIBE to PGA TOUR now: http://pgat.us/vBxcZSh Welcome to the official YouTube channel of the PGA TOUR. Here you can find everything you need to stay up to date with the world’s foremost golf tour.. Check in for highlights from every tournament plus player interviews, player profiles, tournament previews, swing analysis and all the greatest shots and amazing moments. Teryn Schaefer presents the best social media posts from around the world of golf in ‘Trending on TOUR' and after each day's play brings you the biggest talking points in 'The Takeaway'. Check out https://www.pgatour.com for complete coverage along with all the latest news, scoring, and sta...
Tiger Woods bouncing a golf ball for a Nike golf commercial
The Nike VR_S Covert means distance. And distance means never having to say you're sorry. Unless you're hitting up on Tiger Woods. Then you should probably say you're sorry.
Tiger Woods joins Scot Van Pelt to discuss his book about the Masters in 1997 and what it meant to him in his young career, what Woods needs to do to play in this year’s event and how his back issues flared up in February. Watch ESPN on YouTube TV: http://ow.ly/1YWF30aFCi3 Subscribe NOW to ESPN on YouTube: http://ow.ly/xjsF309WWdG Get more ESPN on YouTube: First Take: http://ow.ly/n47n30aLirR SC6 with Michael & Jemele: http://ow.ly/jXhw30aLiGv SportsCenter with SVP: http://ow.ly/upAm30aLiK4 This Is SportsCenter: http://ow.ly/dhu3309WWgH ESPN Must-See: http://ow.ly/VMLx309WWid ESPN Stories: http://ow.ly/3FiD30aLiQs ESPN on Social Media: Follow on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/espn Like on Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/espn Follow on Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/espn Visi...
Golf great Tiger Woods sat down for a rare one-on-one interview with Charlie Rose on Rose's PBS program, as the charitable group he started with his father, the Tiger Woods Foundation, turns 20. Woods spoke about his struggle to come back after a series of injuries, the fallout from controversies he endured in 2009, and the one decision that remains his single biggest regret.
Tiger Woods - speaking candidly with Peter Dawson, Chairman of Falcon Golf, and former Chief Executive of The R&A; and former Secretary of The Royal and Ancient Golf Club of St Andrews - reflects on the injury struggles he has faced over the past 18 months and his comeback in an exclusive interview on the terrace of the the Burj Al Arab hotel in Dubai. Tiger Woods tells Peter Dawson: "I'll never feel great again". Woods also looks ahead to the Masters, shares his views on how to speed up the game, and discusses his approach to course design.
Legendary golfer and pop-culture icon Tiger Woods chats about returning to golf, playing Call of Duty, and maintaining a strong friendship with his ex-wife. Subscribe To "The Late Show" Channel HERE: http://bit.ly/ColbertYouTube For more content from "The Late Show with Stephen Colbert", click HERE: http://bit.ly/1AKISnR Watch full episodes of "The Late Show" HERE: http://bit.ly/1Puei40 Like "The Late Show" on Facebook HERE: http://on.fb.me/1df139Y Follow "The Late Show" on Twitter HERE: http://bit.ly/1dMzZzG Follow "The Late Show" on Google+ HERE: http://bit.ly/1JlGgzw Follow "The Late Show" on Instagram HERE: http://bit.ly/29wfREj Follow "The Late Show" on Tumblr HERE: http://bit.ly/29DVvtR Watch The Late Show with Stephen Colbert weeknights at 11:35 PM ET/10:35 PM CT. Only on CBS. Ge...
In this revealing video a 14 year old Tiger Woods discusses his golfing ambition and his early battles with discrimination amongst the golfing hierarchy. Subscribe for more: http://ow.ly/lJYwy Welcome to Golfing World. Created by IMG Media, the world's leading sports production company, we are a golf media platform delivering an unrivalled mix of golf content to millions of golfers daily. Catch all the latest highlights, exclusive features and behind the scenes news from all the major golf tours worldwide to the very best instruction, destination reviews and player interviews. With new videos being updated every week from across the globe, be sure to check back in regularly to view the latest news and video. In addition, stay tuned for some exciting developments in the coming months.....
Tiger Woods talked with ESPN's Tom Rinaldi for his first public interview since his November 2009 accident/scandal. Woods will return to professional golf at the Masters in early April. All credit goes to ESPN.com for the video. Follow me on Twitter! http://www.twitter.com/ethanculver
Is it a stare? Is it a glare? It's a peeved Tiger Woods! CNN's Jeanne Moos reports. If you liked this story, check out these videos too: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MOAvFRlczTo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AmRN9e8gH7A
Exclusive interview of international sports anchor and reporter Diego Bustos with Tiger Woods. Tiger's first interview after his 2015 back surgery Filmed in October 2015 in Mexico City ahead of the 2015 America's Golf Cup presented by Bridgestone. Topics in this interview: -Latest news about his back surgery -Recovery plans and route map -Family -Growth of golf in Mexico and rest of Latin America -Importance of the America's Golf Cup for the growth of the game -Latin America Amateur Championship -His love for golf -Does golf loves him back? -Others
Check out the Top-10 shots of Tiger Woods' career on the PGA TOUR (excluding majors), feature incredible putting, clutch hole outs, and amazing finishes. . SUBSCRIBE to PGA TOUR now: http://pgat.us/vBxcZSh Welcome to the official YouTube channel of the PGA TOUR. Here you can find everything you need to stay up to date with the world’s foremost golf tour.. Check in for highlights from every tournament plus player interviews, player profiles, tournament previews, swing analysis and all the greatest shots and amazing moments. Teryn Schaefer presents the best social media posts from around the world of golf in ‘Trending on TOUR' and after each day's play brings you the biggest talking points in 'The Takeaway'. Check out https://www.pgatour.com for complete coverage along with all the lates...
Tiger Woods' Beautiful Golf Shots 2016 Hero World Challenge PGA Tournament from 1 Step to Better Golf http://www.1steptobettergolf.com. Watch more videos featuring golf instruction tips, beautiful women golfers, golf music videos, and funny golf bloopers from the PGA Tour, LPGA Tour, European Tour and Asian Tour. Featured professionals include Rory McIlroy, Bubba Watson, Jordan Spieth, Jack Nicklaus, Phil Mickelson, Michelle Wie, Lydia Ko, Tiger Woods, Lexi Thompson, Ben Hogan and more. Featured tournaments include the Masters, US Open, British Open, and more. Check out the 1 Step to Better Golf 4-book series. Books include 1 Step to Better Golf, 1 Step to Hitting it Long, 1 Step to Perfect Putting, and 1 Step to Swinging Like Tiger Woods. There is no need to get new golf equipment or att...
For golf swing tips, visit http://www.playgreatgolf.net
Tiger Woods' Great Golf Shots from 1997 Masters Tournament from 1 Step to Better Golf http://www.1steptobettergolf.com. Watch more videos featuring golf instruction tips, beautiful women golfers, golf music videos, and funny golf bloopers from the PGA Tour, LPGA Tour, European Tour and Asian Tour. Featured professionals include Rory McIlroy, Bubba Watson, Jordan Spieth, Jack Nicklaus, Phil Mickelson, Michelle Wie, Lydia Ko, Tiger Woods, Lexi Thompson, Ben Hogan and more. Featured tournaments include the Masters, US Open, British Open, and more. Check out the 1 Step to Better Golf 4-book series. Books include 1 Step to Better Golf, 1 Step to Hitting it Long, 1 Step to Perfect Putting, and 1 Step to Swinging Like Tiger Woods. There is no need to get new golf equipment or attend an expensive...
Enjoy and please remember to subscribe if you're a golf nut like me.
Before every round Tiger Woods plays on the PGA TOUR, he goes through an extensive warm up routine, and we have an all-access look at how he prepares for competition. . SUBSCRIBE to PGA TOUR now: http://pgat.us/vBxcZSh Welcome to the official YouTube channel of the PGA TOUR. Here you can find everything you need to stay up to date with the world’s foremost golf tour.. Check in for highlights from every tournament plus player interviews, player profiles, tournament previews, swing analysis and all the greatest shots and amazing moments. Teryn Schaefer presents the best social media posts from around the world of golf in ‘Trending on TOUR' and after each day's play brings you the biggest talking points in 'The Takeaway'. Check out https://www.pgatour.com for complete coverage along with ...
Golf's Greatest Rounds - Tiger Woods - 2007 Tour Championship PGA Tour, NBC, Golf Channel footage
Ellen shocked both herself and the golf pro during this game of golf.
Tiger Woods' Lovely Niece Cheyenne Golf Highlights 2016 KPMG PGA Championship LPGA Tournament from 1 Step to Better Golf http://www.1steptobettergolf.com. Watch more videos featuring golf instruction tips, beautiful women golfers, golf music videos, and funny golf bloopers from the PGA Tour, LPGA Tour, European Tour and Asian Tour. Featured professionals include Rory McIlroy, Bubba Watson, Jordan Spieth, Jack Nicklaus, Phil Mickelson, Michelle Wie, Lydia Ko, Tiger Woods, Lexi Thompson, Ben Hogan and more. Featured tournaments include the Masters, US Open, British Open, and more. Check out the 1 Step to Better Golf 4-book series. Books include 1 Step to Better Golf, 1 Step to Hitting it Long, 1 Step to Perfect Putting, and 1 Step to Swinging Like Tiger Woods. There is no need to get new go...
Tiger Woods joins Scot Van Pelt to discuss his book about the Masters in 1997 and what it meant to him in his young career, what Woods needs to do to play in this year’s event and how his back issues flared up in February. Watch ESPN on YouTube TV: http://ow.ly/1YWF30aFCi3 Subscribe NOW to ESPN on YouTube: http://ow.ly/xjsF309WWdG Get more ESPN on YouTube: First Take: http://ow.ly/n47n30aLirR SC6 with Michael & Jemele: http://ow.ly/jXhw30aLiGv SportsCenter with SVP: http://ow.ly/upAm30aLiK4 This Is SportsCenter: http://ow.ly/dhu3309WWgH ESPN Must-See: http://ow.ly/VMLx309WWid ESPN Stories: http://ow.ly/3FiD30aLiQs ESPN on Social Media: Follow on Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/espn Like on Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/espn Follow on Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/espn Visi...
Golf great Tiger Woods sat down for a rare one-on-one interview with Charlie Rose on Rose's PBS program, as the charitable group he started with his father, the Tiger Woods Foundation, turns 20. Woods spoke about his struggle to come back after a series of injuries, the fallout from controversies he endured in 2009, and the one decision that remains his single biggest regret.
Tiger Woods - speaking candidly with Peter Dawson, Chairman of Falcon Golf, and former Chief Executive of The R&A; and former Secretary of The Royal and Ancient Golf Club of St Andrews - reflects on the injury struggles he has faced over the past 18 months and his comeback in an exclusive interview on the terrace of the the Burj Al Arab hotel in Dubai. Tiger Woods tells Peter Dawson: "I'll never feel great again". Woods also looks ahead to the Masters, shares his views on how to speed up the game, and discusses his approach to course design.
Legendary golfer and pop-culture icon Tiger Woods chats about returning to golf, playing Call of Duty, and maintaining a strong friendship with his ex-wife. Subscribe To "The Late Show" Channel HERE: http://bit.ly/ColbertYouTube For more content from "The Late Show with Stephen Colbert", click HERE: http://bit.ly/1AKISnR Watch full episodes of "The Late Show" HERE: http://bit.ly/1Puei40 Like "The Late Show" on Facebook HERE: http://on.fb.me/1df139Y Follow "The Late Show" on Twitter HERE: http://bit.ly/1dMzZzG Follow "The Late Show" on Google+ HERE: http://bit.ly/1JlGgzw Follow "The Late Show" on Instagram HERE: http://bit.ly/29wfREj Follow "The Late Show" on Tumblr HERE: http://bit.ly/29DVvtR Watch The Late Show with Stephen Colbert weeknights at 11:35 PM ET/10:35 PM CT. Only on CBS. Ge...
In this revealing video a 14 year old Tiger Woods discusses his golfing ambition and his early battles with discrimination amongst the golfing hierarchy. Subscribe for more: http://ow.ly/lJYwy Welcome to Golfing World. Created by IMG Media, the world's leading sports production company, we are a golf media platform delivering an unrivalled mix of golf content to millions of golfers daily. Catch all the latest highlights, exclusive features and behind the scenes news from all the major golf tours worldwide to the very best instruction, destination reviews and player interviews. With new videos being updated every week from across the globe, be sure to check back in regularly to view the latest news and video. In addition, stay tuned for some exciting developments in the coming months.....
Tiger Woods talked with ESPN's Tom Rinaldi for his first public interview since his November 2009 accident/scandal. Woods will return to professional golf at the Masters in early April. All credit goes to ESPN.com for the video. Follow me on Twitter! http://www.twitter.com/ethanculver
Is it a stare? Is it a glare? It's a peeved Tiger Woods! CNN's Jeanne Moos reports. If you liked this story, check out these videos too: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MOAvFRlczTo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AmRN9e8gH7A
Exclusive interview of international sports anchor and reporter Diego Bustos with Tiger Woods. Tiger's first interview after his 2015 back surgery Filmed in October 2015 in Mexico City ahead of the 2015 America's Golf Cup presented by Bridgestone. Topics in this interview: -Latest news about his back surgery -Recovery plans and route map -Family -Growth of golf in Mexico and rest of Latin America -Importance of the America's Golf Cup for the growth of the game -Latin America Amateur Championship -His love for golf -Does golf loves him back? -Others
I got big balls
Big old balls
Big as grape fruits
Big as pumpkins
Yes sir, yes sir
And on my really good days
They swell to the size of small dogs
My balls are as big as small dogs
Well it ain't braggin' if it's true
Yes sir, yes sir
Muhammad Ali said that
Back when he was a young man
Back when he was cassius clay
Before he fought too many fights
And left his brain inside the ring
And sometimes I wish I was Tiger Woods
Tiger Woods, Tiger Woods
Yeah I got a friend whose goal in life
Was to one day go down on Madonna
That's all he wanted, that was all,
To one day go down on Madonna
And when my friend was 34, he got his wish in Rome one night
He got to go down on Madonna
In Rome on night in some hotel
And ever since he's been depressed
His life is shit from here on in
And all our friends just shake their heads
And say too soon, too soon, too soon
He went down on Madonna too soon
Too young, too young, too soon, too soon
And it ain't braggin if it's true
Yes sir, yes sir
No it ain't braggin' if it's true
Muhammad Ali said that
Back when he was a young man
Back when he was cassius clay
Before he fought too many fights
And left his brain inside the ring
And sometimes I wish I was Tiger Woods
Tiger Woods, Tiger Woods
If certain girls don't look at you
It means that they like you a lot
If other girls don't look at you, it just means they're ignoring you
How can you know
How can you know
Which is which, who's doin' what
I guess that you can ask 'em
Which one are you baby
Do you like me or are you ignoring me
Do you like me or are you ignoring me
And all you need to do that
Is one big pair of big balls
Balls as big as grapefruits
Balls as big as pumpkins
Balls as big as mine
But even though my balls are big
Sometimes I wish they were bigger
Even bigger
Big as the wheels on a tractor
Big as the golden arches
Big as the golden gate bridge
Big as the state of Kansas
Big as Mars and Jupiter
Big as the swing of Tiger Woods
Tiger Woods, Tiger Woods