Source: Stocksy
Look, I’m going to get straight to the point. New mums are not really interested in you, but they are very interested in what you can bring to the table. The one in the dining room.
It’s nothing personal, but in those dreamy weeks after a new baby is born, 90 per cent of mum’s attention is devoted to that baby. Seven percent is devoted to wondering when she can get up and do a wee, and the remaining three  percent goes towards trying to move the teacup within reach while breastfeeding.
But this does not make you – the lovely, trusted, friend that you are – redundant. Not by any means. There are so many things that you can do to make a new mum feel supported and loved in her most sleep deprived hours of need.
We asked a whole bunch of veteran baby makers what they really valued in their early days of parenthood. Here’s what they recommend:
1. Bring food
Organic veggie boxes are all well and good, but what new mums really want is food they don’t have to make themselves. Can it be stored, microwaved and eaten out of the container? She’ll take it!
She just wants some comfort food that’s easy to eat. Source: Kidspot
2. Give us some shower time
Just come, cuddle the baby and make soothing sounds so that new mum can stand under running water for ten minutes without having a panic attack. Thank you!
3. Grab the bread and milk
Or whatever she needs. A simple text from the supermarket to see if she needs anything would be wonderful.
4. Just listen without judgement
She doesn’t need that judgement and she doesn’t want your advice. She just wants to sob uncontrollably down the phone to someone who will remind her that it will  be OK, over and over again.
She probably hasn’t had a warm tea in weeks. Source: Kidspot
5. Wash the tea cups
New babies tend to  attract many visitors, and they’re not all as switched on as you. Many arrive, drink some tea, eat a biscuit and then leave - a sinkful of dishes remaining in their wake. So when you visit, please wash the teacups! She will love you for it,
6. GIVE HER CHOCOLATE
No explanation necessary.
7. Give her a break - from her other children
New mums who are new for the second, third or even tenth time crave uninterrupted, guilt-free space with their youngest. Often the best thing you can do is come over and take the other kids out of the picture. Tucker them out so they come home and sleep!
8. Bring a box of nappies or wipes
She can never have enough, she’s ALWAYS running out. That emergency box will be her little saviour.
9. Don’t ask, just launder
Really, she has so much of it, she’s positively drowning in laundry. She’ll never ask you to do it for her, because even thinking about it brings on a sense of desolation and hopelessness. Just scope the house, find the washing machine and put on a load. She’ll be thanking you on the inside.
10. Keep it brief
She loves you and she’s desperate to see other adults, but having visitors is exhausting for everyone. So be a darl and don’t hang around all day (unless you’re actually cleaning the whole house and changing the bed sheets. THAT would be lovely).
She may have trouble stringing a sentence together, but she still loves to listen. Source: Kidspot
11. Take her for a walk
If bub is too young to be away from mum’s arms for more than 20 seconds, going for a walk with her is often the best and simplest blessing. Those jaunts round the block can quickly get boring, so your company could make her day.
12. Remember, it’s not all about the baby
The baby only wants mum, but mum needs YOU. Just having someone to offer her tea, make her laugh and chat about inane things is amazing therapy for the heart.
13. Give her a massage
If it’s early days, having someone rock up with oils and a pair of strong hands is basically every postpartum mum’s fantasy. Having a new baby wreaks havoc on her neck, shoulders and hips. Whether the masseuse is you, or if you get a bunch of mates to chip in for a massage voucher, she will be eternally grateful.
14. Pass her the remote
Look, she’s tired, so very, very tired. Sometimes the best thing you can do is put the TV remote in her hand, make sure she has water, tea and a snack within reach, and leave her to it. Go clean the toilet or something. Heaven.
15. If in doubt, do what these guys did
Kidspot writer, Bek Day shared this - and it’s perfect: “The best visitors we had brought two frozen meals for our freezer, their own morning tea, paper plates, coffees for everyone and a soothing face mask for me. They stayed for half an hour, took all their rubbish with them and then sent us all these beautiful photos they’d taken of us with Frankie without being asked.” Those guests can come anytime.
