Hands up who is sick and tired of cooking dinner for their kids every night only to have them complain about what's on their plate.
I have both hands up. So too does Bunmi Laditan, the humorist behind the social media phenomenon the Honest Toddler and author of Toddlers Are A**holes: It's Not Your Fault and her latest novel, Confessions Of A Domestic Failure.
Laditan has now spoken out on her Facebook page about the drudgery of meal time. And it's been shared nearly 22,000 times by frustrated parents everywhere.
"Alright guys, I'm gonna get real with you for a second," she wrote. "Dinner time is some ultimate bulls**t and I'm TIRED of it.
"I'm tired of dinner. It is absolutely insane that every night, mothers and fathers are forced to waste their life force trying to convince their seed to CONTINUE LIVING via the ingestion of essential nutrients. You don't see baby koalas and buffalo rejecting their bamboo and savanna grass do you? You don't see little toddler alligators talking about, 'Mama, this gazelle is too stringy. It's hot. Mama the blood is hot. It's hot, mama. Can you blow on it even though I too am capable of blowing?' You don't hear baby seagulls asking how many more bites of sewer garbage they have to eat until they can go shit on a sunbather. No. It's just human children."
"I'm sick of it. I'm sick of cooking food 1/3 or 2/3 or 0/3 of them like and watching them look at their plates of pan-seared chicken thighs with roasted potatoes and baby corn like it's a pile of duck tongues served with on a bed of infant baby fingers garnished with dirty toenail clippings, backwash and leprosy. It's not poison, kids, it's called FOOD welcome to life."
She goes on to explain that she doesn't hate her kids, she just hates dinner time. She also hates the stupid advice given to parents.
"'Just wait them out, then.' GENIUS," she said. "I'll just sit at the table with one sobbing kid while the other two fend for themselves (i.e. fight to the death). Or better yet, I'll just put the meal away until they're hungry and keep re-serving it to them like this is some kind of internment camp or KGB training exercise meant to break their wills so that I can rebuild them into robotic super spies.
"'Just send them to bed without eating.' Hilarious. I like sleeping. It agrees with me."
She called on parents everywhere to unite and tackle the issue of whingeing kids together.
"We as parents need to come together," she wrote. "Rather than feeding our children individually in our own homes, we need to nourish them at giant picnic tables in the street sitting side by side, too distracted by each other's presence to realise they're eating. Screw traffic - every night at 6PM, we set up the collapsible tables and do it orphanage-style: handing out sandwiches and apple slices and then hosing down the kids with dish soap (bath time) and calling it a night. Success."
After suffering through many a night of complaining kids I'd be keen to give this a go. The only problem is how will we cut the sandwiches – triangles or squares?