Cairo Journal; Who Messes With Egyptian Minds? Satirist Points at U.S.

It is startling, to say the least, to be quietly sitting in a Cairo cafe when the door flies open and a troop of armed American soldiers barges in shouting, ''Turn off your goddamn mobiles!''

They are actors, though, and their abrupt entrance into the lobby coffee shop of the Hanagir Theater is intended to mimic the jolt felt across the Arab world when the United States Army stormed into Iraq.

The scene kicks off a harshly anti-American show called ''Messing With the Mind'' now playing what passes for Off Broadway in Cairo. The play has been sold out nightly since it opened in late January for what was originally to be a two-week run.

The low-budget production meanders through a thicket of regional issues including the Arab-Israeli dispute, the inability of young people to afford marriage, the dubious appeal of American goods and the mushrooming of satellite television news networks. But it focuses on the American occupation of Iraq and possibly beyond with biting sarcasm.

''The question is whether total surrender is the only option we face or whether we can resist,'' said Khaled al-Sawy, the writer, director and star of the play. ''Most plays just weep about our general situation; they show us as dying. But I felt people wanted a play that talks about resisting.''

The overall conceit of the play is that Gen. Tommy Fox (Mr. Sawy), the top American military commander for the region, appears as the main guest on the country's most popular television talk show, ''Homesick for Egypt.''

''As you all know, we are now breathing the aroma of freedom,'' Madame Nadia, the show's hostess, says with cloying pertness before introducing her guest and asking him if he has any message for Arab youth.

''I want to tell Arab youth that the only reason we came to this region was to liberate it from old regimes,'' the general responds, going on at times to describe Arabs in unprintable English.

The play uses various aspects of American culture to deride United States policy, including rap songs and booming show tunes. ''That's why we don't like it Hezbollah! That's why we say No Intifada!'' General Fox sings in English at one point.

American political figures put in appearances, either in person or name. The show is interrupted by advertisements for products like Condoleezza Margarine -- ''It's a real problem solver'' -- and a steroid drink called Colin Power. Just one sip allows you to ''trounce four men and conquer four women.''

President Bush, too, shows up, justifying the American-led invasion of Iraq through a live speech on ''Democracy Television,'' a joke about Al Hurra, or The Free One, the Arabic satellite news channel that his administration finances.

''We just want to clean you up, make you human beings,'' Mr. Bush says. ''Arab petroleum is for the Arabs and democracy is for the Arabs. We are going to make you cool, open your minds. We will never forget your favors -- we love you, believe me we love you.''

Naturally the piece also mocks Washington's unwavering support for Israel.

Audiences unfailingly emerge from the theater buzzing with excitement and admiration, because the show amplifies the current mood across the Arab world. But the play has its detractors, generally for being rather thin burlesque.

''It allows people to exercise a kind of hour of hate, or whatever George Orwell called it,'' said Nehad Selaiha, a drama critic for Egypt's main newspaper, Al Ahram. ''It's just a piece of political cabaret which is shallow and one-sided; it sort of panders to the feeling of political frustration.''

Some critics were especially disparaging of what appears to be a salute to suicide bombers in the middle of the play. While General Fox is giving a news conference, parrying questions about American casualties in Iraq by pretending that he cannot hear, a fanatic tries to kill him.

The huge television screen used as the backdrop then lights up with a videotaped suicide note from the would-be assassin preaching jihad. The scene never fails to draw big applause.

Mr. Sawy defends the scene, noting that the attack occurs when there are only American military men on stage, not civilians, and that he is trying to make a larger point when a picture of Cairo's streets jammed with people fills the backdrop.

''The solution is to get people out onto the streets, not through these kinds of operations,'' he said.

Perhaps the most popular moment in the play comes at the end, at a kind of beauty pageant in which 10 correspondents from various satellite television networks file competing reports about United States forces seizing the Iraqi port of Umm Qasr, one of the opening battles of the war.

Libyan TV has Col. Muammar el-Qaddafi declaring Umm Qasr part of his territory with soaring oratory, while Al Jazeera reports having received an exclusive tape from the Qasr family denying any link to Al Qaeda.

Manar, the Hezbollah station, wonders why the Arab nation is not rising up as one to resist the occupation. But one of the biggest laughs comes after the CNN report, which offers a parody of the growing habit among United States networks to present happy news about American soldiers.

''Our boys have entered Umm Qasr, and everybody was hugging them and ululating,'' the CNN reporter says. ''American troops started distributing Big Macs and milkshakes with straws, and they taught those miserable Iraqi children how to play with the straws. They also started distributing ice cream.''