THAT'S not what you said in the Jeffries' Tube

((updated 16th August 2016))

How to stop twitter swallowing your time

My twitter feed is reasonably tight, and an effective tool for me to communicate with others while not getting swamped by spam. Here's how I do it:

1. I don't backread further than the first scroll of my timeline. Ever. Twitter is something for NOW.


2. Tweetdeck is your friend. You can put lists in different columns and then arrange columns so that important stuff is more visible. If you want to be an effective twitter user I definitely recommend it.


3. I don't track or care who follows me. If you follow me, I won't notice unless you talk to me.


4. I always check my @ replies before my home screen, and regularly throughout the day, and am happy to talk to people whether I am following them or not.


5. I only follow people who tweet consistently interestingly, and don't pay any attention to whether or not they are following me. If you're a nice-but-dull person then sorry, but I won't fill my timeline with your tweets.


6. If someone posts something on my timeline that annoys or offends me I unfollow them, even if they are someone I generally admire, but I don't generally mute or block unless the offensiveness comes in @ replies.


7. If someone I don't know spams me or sends me an offensive @ reply I mute them immediately. Life is too short to put up with arseholes.


8. If someone I do know is consistently annoying/offensive in @ replies then I will generally mute them rather than block them. I'll admit that it takes a lot more provocation from someone I do know than someone I don't for me to hit mute, and even then it's sometimes only on a temporary basis if they just won't shut up about something we disagree on and I have no spoons.


9. I block very little. I have no issue with people I disagree with or who offend me reading my tweets; as long as I don't have to read their responses I don't care


10. Once a month or so I use Manage Flitter to clear out inactives and/or people I had a fad for a few months ago that I am no longer interested in (last year's contestants on The Voice, for example).

So you can see that the people I talk to on twitter and the people I follow on twitter are two overlapping but distinct groups. I don't think I miss much, because people who post consistently interestingly are bound to get retweeted, so I pick them up eventually. Also, there's no real pattern to the people I follow, other than that I find them interesting: there's politicos and journos, musicians, artists, sciencey tweeps, young folk, old folk... your job or your age or your gender or any other attribute doesn't really matter, as long as you are interesting.

Oh, one other thing: I absolutely do not and never will get offended by people not following me back. Just because I am interested in what you have to say does not mean I will assume that you are interested in what I have to say. If you're not following me then I need to try harder to be interesting.


How to stop twitter swallowing your sanity

Twitter can often be mentally draining, even if it's not draining your time. Tips to prevent a twitter meltdown are as follows:

1. The most important one: know when to walk away. This is a thing that is useful in all aspects of interacting with other people, and not one I have always mastered. Sometimes people will be dicks. It's not always on purpose, but engaging dicks in conversation is often way more wearing on you than it is on them. If a conversation looks to be getting to the point where it's more bother than it is worth, walk away. Mute if you have to.


2. Use Wheaton's Law. Seriously, we can all have days when we are less well-disposed to our fellow human than we might be; if you feel yourself starting to be dickish, walk away. Things which count as dickish on twitter include:
   • Starting a dogpile when someone says something you disagree with. Whether you do this by .replying or quote-tweeting, it's still dickish.
   • Sealioning
   • Replying to a very old tweet
   • Continually @ replying to a person who has asked to be dropped out of a discussion.
   ... as well as the usual ad hominems, gaslighting, etc.


3. Take a break if you need to. Don't be afraid to have a day off, or a week, or a month. Twitter will still be there if and when you decide to go back.


4. If someone sets a dogpile on you, don't be afraid to go locked for a few days.


5. If someone starts serious abuse, don't be afraid to go locked permanently.


6. If someone issues criminal threats, don't be afraid to report them to the rozzers, AND go locked.