Malatesta's Blog

Anti-Fascists Fight Against Daesh! 

Crivvens! Jings! And Help Ma Boab! To say that 2016 was a big loada boak is an understatement but boaking buckets aside, the UK far right did have an utterly shite one as well with masses of arrests, jail time and public embarrassments. The year started with a right bang in Dover when a load of fascist wank-spasms and shit-cones had a jolly old knees-up that ended up in mass brawling with plod, anti-fascists, and each other – which they then repeated in April. Despite temporary unity of the fractured groupuscules, these demos proved disastrous with accusations of grassing and cowardice followed by some heavy manners sentencing. Co-organiser Paul Podromofo of South East Alcoholics may have avoided a doing over in Dover but he didn’t avoid some ‘soft middle class student’ anti-fascists who proper put him in hospital after a telling off.

Down & Spark Out In Dover

Many of the North West/North East Imbeciles were utterly humiliated in Liverpool. Twice. And after their pint-size piss-pot leader, pregnant woman beater, and Irishman in denial, Shane Carrick William O’ Donnell Ballywinter Rourke Wood O’ Calvert was jailed, they remain somewhat moribund. O’ Calvert hadn’t changed his clothes since he last got out of jail so he was well pleased with his new 2nd hand underpants and grubby prison tracksuit that are better quality than his usual knock off tat.

Lamped In Liverpool!

Rumours abounded at the start of 2017 that Fatty Jeffrey Marshbubbles of Poo & Mash was trying to take over the Imbeciles but as he is too old, lardy and rubbish at fighting to cope with frisky demos, and, after a stint in jail last year for bravely assaulting a woman, he has lost his bottle and prefers to hide in toilets. Poor Fatty Fuckbuckle.

Joe Butler/Jeff Marsh: Jiggle-Oh!

Someone forgot to tell EDL leader Ian Crossland that calling a national demo in London that attracted less than 50 supporters was embarrassing. However, Crossland is a man limited by weak choices and stupidity and when even the most racist basic life-form can see the EDL is a waste of time, he has yet to digest such crucial information. He had been romantically engaged with ‘EDL Angel’ Gail Speight who was hoofed out for fiduciary malfeasance and we miss her drunken, wobbly speeches and the smatter of glamour she provided. After the EDL’s disastrous national demo, ex-convict failure Andrew Edge decided to organise a splinter faction called United Patriots of Britain but this disappeared as fast as socks in Poundland do when Edge is out ‘shopping.’

Gail & Crossland: the Brad & Angelina of the EDL!

Britain First were the only group to maintain a media presence in 2016, usually over some fuck-up or other, but then Pudding-Heid Golding was jailed for breaking a court order and generally being a woodentop. He ended up on the ‘special wing’ tucking into his halal turkey twizzlers at Christmas but not only that, Jayda dumped him, BF sacked him, and all financial support was withdrawn. BF also organised a ‘Singles Division’ which, unsurprisingly, every BF member joined.

Jayda: ‘You’re going down mate – but not on me!’ 

National Action Men, the Combat Under-18s, also got a lot of coverage after being proscribed by the state. They were forced to disband in a huff as they had just printed 100s of quids worth of top quality bollocks on shiny paper which is now in the recycling bin. Plod will be keeping them under heavy manners in case they reform under a new nom-de-guerre. 

Another Impressive Victory For National Action

Tommy Robinson’s Pegida ‘movement’ proved an utter failure with barely 100 turning up for demos and he really doesn’t know what to do with himself. May we suggest he gets a fucken job and looks after his kids instead of gadding about like a twat? Without Robinson, the far right have stumbled into 2017 directionless, leaderless and clueless as a replacement fuhrer has yet to emerge because few on the UK far right are articulate, confident or coherent enough to speak to the media, or keep their warring micro-factions from battering each other.

The far right like wearing silly t-shirts with ‘Taliban Fighting Club’ or ‘Fuck ISIS’ on them but getting pissed and marching round Dover or Liverpool looking like ultra-qwunts is not the way to fight Islamic extremism. Anti-fascist militants from around the world are actually fighting Daesh in Syria and Iraq, and the Bob Crow Brigade are proud to fly the Anti-Fascist Action flag. Anti-fascists in Ukraine have also had to deal with neo-Nazis working for shady government organisations, as well as the neo-Nazis who are on the Russian side but they have also flown the AFA flag and we salute all our comrades in Iraq, Syria and Ukraine.

Victory to the anti-fascist fighters around the globe!