Mexico has erected a full-length border wall to keep out the millions of Americans hoping to flee from a Trump presidency.
The wall, which stretches the entire length of the Mexico-US border, was built by a team of Mexican labourers who until recently had formed the backbone of the American agricultural industry. They've since pre-empted a Trump victory and returned home, causing the US agricultural industry to collapse.
A Mexican spokesperson said the country could not accommodate such an influx of illegal immigration, particularly from a country full of people crazy enough to vote for a pseudo-fascist reality TV host.
Yesterday thousands of Americans were trapped on the Californian and Texan borders, desperately looking for gaps in the wall. One man said he planned to hire a Mexican immigrant to build him a large ladder to enable him to scale the wall.
He then remembered there were no Mexican immigrants available. He will start work on the ladder himself next month.
This story first appeared at The Shovel.