Garry Linnell is a Fairfax Media columnist and the co-presenter of the 2UE Breakfast Show.
A month ago our refrigerator had to be replaced after 18 months of constant leaks. Last week the dishwasher, barely a year old, was hauled back to its manufacturer after a leak caused kitchen benches to swell and warp.
There's a time machine hidden at the rear of my mother-in-law's house. True story. We've kept it secret for a long time because we all love using it and don't want anyone else muscling in on our good fortune. But now it's time to let the rest of the world know how easy it is to journey back to another era.
Two heavily pregnant women share a hospital room. Talk turns to the men in their lives, the fathers of their soon-to-be-born children. The similarities are striking. Both discover he's about the same age. Travels interstate a lot. God help them – he even has the same name. Surname, too. Same guy. Two lives.
Subtlety has been grabbed by the neck, strangled and buried somewhere in his backyard shed.
You're in the middle of a conga line of motionless cars stretching 19 kilometres and the only thing to keep your mind off this situation is to fantasise about what you would like to do to the idiot who caused it.
Who said romance dies as you grow older? Here I sit, deep in the gnarly grip of middle age only to find an old flame back in my life, rekindling all that old magic.
This is a tough city and it demands the stoutest of hearts and minds.
No wonder they call it God's waiting room. Even He seems a little impatient today. Thunder beats a drum solo on the ceilings, black clouds draw a curtain on the light. And in the dining room on this sultry, stormy Sydney afternoon, the residents of an aged care nursing home are enduring the greatest trial life imposes on the old.
What we don't like to discuss is just how living in these new apartment towers will inevitably change the psychology of the city – and those who live in it.
Take your hand off it for a moment. Please. Hard to do, I know. The damn thing is the bane of my existence as well. It's like being the better half of an evil siamese twin. No matter where you go it's always with you, nagging, nudging, distracting and, even worse, playing with your mind.
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