It was with pure frustration and that ever nagging question (are they all just after their five minutes of fame?) that I watched the remaining Married At First Sight couples walk away from latest commitment ceremony still together.
Why, why, why?
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Even with no passion, Michelle stays
Michelle decides to stay with Jesse despite saying "I would never say there was ever any passion" on Married at First Sight. Vision: Nine Network
The greatest hope and "shining beacon" for this stupid experiment has been Perth mining gal Susan and Queensland cowboy Sean, and even they were being realistic by having called it a day on their so-called "marriage". They have chosen instead to be friends since they live on opposite sides of the country but will continue to spend time together on the show because Channel Nine is footing the cost of flights.
Sensible. Disappointing for viewers rooting for them. But sensible.
![Why stay? Despite Michelle saying 'this is going to be awkward' he opts to stay on Married First Sight with Jesse.](/web/20170228193631im_/http://www.theage.com.au/content/dam/images/g/u/l/i/e/z/image.related.articleLeadwide.620x349.guj08a.png/1488143087154.jpg)
Then you have Michelle. The Perth twin, who has admitted from the start to having zero chemistry or romantic feelings for pint-sized South Australian Jesse and who practically cries out "I want to leave" at every self-cam opportunity, was given an out by the so-called experts but instead chose to stay!
Michelle's still waiting for fireworks... #9Married pic.twitter.com/VrKTqkjK3D
— MarriedAtFirstSight (@MarriedAU) February 20, 2017
Despite telling everyone on the show that she's a "realist" and it has only been four weeks so "maybe in the future there might be passion [and] every day we're moving at a gradual pace but, yeah, it definitely hasn't detracted or anything", it seems more likely that she has a secret pact with her twin, Sharon, to see the show out together while the other wishes to stay.
And Sharon does want to stay. Despite the 'strippergate' drama with Nick, the pair are at least attracted to one another.
![Heartbreaking: Susan and Sean are now only friends on Married At First Sight.](/web/20170228193631im_/http://www.theage.com.au/content/dam/images/g/u/l/i/e/k/image.related.articleLeadwide.620x349.guj08a.png/1488143087154.jpg)
Strip clubs and chill? 🙅 #9Married pic.twitter.com/Wkg1ihHWZu
— MarriedAtFirstSight (@MarriedAU) February 14, 2017
Married man = changed man? #9Married pic.twitter.com/yF4Bc5X0T2
— MarriedAtFirstSight (@MarriedAU) February 20, 2017
Jesse just gets a Peter Pan label and swipe left (if only this show was Tinder!).
Jesse and Michelle watching Nick and Sharon like... #9Married pic.twitter.com/BtdyGs5Fz4
— MarriedAtFirstSight (@MarriedAU) February 20, 2017
It's not a criticism of Michelle that she's not attracted to Jesse; just a fact. Had she'd been set-up on a blind date via friends or an online matchmaking site she'd have politely made her excuses and called it an evening.
We all know this yet we're too invested to give up watching now. Which is why Nine has announced that it will be commissioning a fifth series of the show, and why wouldn't they with ratings being so high.
![The couple you love to hate: Anthony and Nadia.](http://web.archive.org./web/20170228193631im_/http://www.smh.com.au/content/dam/images/g/u/l/i/d/n/image.imgtype.articleLeadwide.620x349.png/1488074684523.png)
The couple you love to hate: Anthony and Nadia. Photo: Nine
And then there are the couples you love to hate:
- Like Anthony the racing broadcaster (aka Mr 'I have an opinion on everything and everyone needs to know it'), who condescendingly wants to turn "directionless" Nadia into his little lady. And she lets him. With. A. Smile. On. Her. Face! (She has since said that she hasn't always been comfortable with his comments)
- And nagging nurse wife Alene, who needs everything about poor country bumpkin Simon to change; from his looks (OK the locks weren't my cup of tea either) to his ability to answer her every question at lightning speed.
Alene's getting her snoop on... 😎 #9Married pic.twitter.com/MTPeEnXiw0
— MarriedAtFirstSight (@MarriedAU) February 21, 2017
But even if you do, somehow, believe that these couples really are looking for love in their "matched" partner, you have to admit that marrying them and then working backwards is only a recipe for disaster. Look at failed couples Deborah and John, Scarlett and Michael, and Andrew and Lauren.
Speaking of dumped groom Andrew, did it really come as a surprise to the Peth firefighter that a cheesy serenade put on for the cameras would not woo his new romantic interest, the headstrong Cheryl? Wasn't it just a few weeks ago that she was bitterly complaining over her then-"husband" Jonathan putting on show?
Ouch 😘 🙅 #9Married pic.twitter.com/mkdE0IyDAw
— MarriedAtFirstSight (@MarriedAU) February 21, 2017
So why keep watching? Because next week's promo promises that Cheryl's father will do everything in his power to break Andrew and Cheryl up. Damn you, Channel Nine. Damn you!
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