"The cuddle police can go to hell," according to babycare author and toddler tactician Pinky McKay, ahead of her appearance at the Essential Baby & Toddler Show in Brisbane next weekend.
Ms McKay is the author of Sleeping like a Baby, Parenting by Heart and Toddler Tactics as well as the creator of Boobie Bikkies, which support and boost a healthy milk supply for mothers.
She will headline the Bio-Oil seminars at the expo, where professionals discuss the ins-and-outs of raising children, and take the stage twice a day with her top tips on impulse control, understanding tiny brains, how to manage toddler tantrums as well as feeding advice.
The toddler tactician is a big fan of cuddles for every toddler as well as plenty of nurturing and focused attention and promises to discuss what parents need to learn and where to find it.
Ms McKay said the toddler stage of any childhood is crucial because there is significant brain development under way and parents can feel as though things are going "pear-shaped" when their child struggles to control their emotions and behaviour.
She is a mother of five children as well as a grandmother to three and said her own offspring were "wild" when they were small and believes there are three keys to minimising tantrums - touch, eye contact and focused attention.
Children at that stage of development are becoming more and more mobile, so really focusing on a physical and emotional connection is important.
She also said parents should be responsive and nurturing when trying to put their child to sleep and controlled crying could adversely affect brain development, due to the high levels of stress hormones generated.
"If parents are more responsive to their baby, it means good connections will be formed during the brain development," Ms McKay said.
In addition to being a babycare author, Ms McKay is also a lactation consultant and believes a trick of the trade to encourage successful breastfeeding is smell.
She recommended mothers to not wash their breasts with soap or perfume in the 24 hours after the first feed, because the baby will be encouraged to reattach to the breast by a familiar smell.
In summary, Ms McKay said parents should trust themselves, communicate with each other and surround themselves with a strong support network.
The Essential Baby & Toddler Show, presented by Blackmores, will be held at the Brisbane Convention & Exhibition Centre from Friday, March 3, until Sunday, March 5.
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