Drew Curtis' FARK.com

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Sat February 25, 2017

Source	Fark Headline		Comments
		The best part of a War on Drugs is that you get to accuse anyone who wants to stop your War on Drugs of being a drug dealer source: aljazeera.com \| share:	11

Fri February 24, 2017

		Looks like Peter Parker has some competition (Not safe for work content in sidebar & below article) source: thesun.co.uk \| share:	16
		You have the right to remain silent. Any video you post on Snapchat can -- and will -- be used against you source: actionnewsjax.com \| share:	19

		Too busy to sit through Church on March 1st? Come through the drive through and we'll rub dirt on your forehead source: kansas.com \| share:	13
		Unusually mild winter in Canada thwarting traditional Canadian ritual of putting old people onto ice floes and never seeing them again. What do you mean she's back? source: cbc.ca \| share:	9
		Judge to claimant: Fat, drunk and careless while wearing high heels is no way to go down the stairs lady source: metro.co.uk \| share:	24
		Sword-wielding felon threatens customers at Florida Walmart. 'Inappropriate weaponry at Florida Walmart' trifecta in play source: foxnews.com \| share:	16
		Kentukcy PD: Yea, maybe it wasn't the best idea to put a giant skull representing a vigilante and cold-blooded murderer emblazoned with the "Blue Lives Matter" colors on our vehicles...our bad source: io9.gizmodo.com \| share:	88

		Kissimmee police take EPIC ethics training, which was totally rad and tubular source: mynews13.com \| share:	10
		California Governor wants to spend $450 million on flood control - or about the same amount it costs to build 1 mile of high-speed rail source: sacbee.com \| share:	39
		Actual headline: Mr. Peanut and the Nutmobile have come to Huntsville. And here we thought he was appointed as AG in Washington source: whnt.com \| share:	8
		Photoshop these pelicans source: scontent-atl3-1.xx.fbcdn.net \| share:	14
		Mullet man says hair is not a hate crime source: 10tv.com \| share:	26
		Types of mass transit commuters. #1: Meh. #2: Needs to get kicked off. #3: Kicked off. #4: Needs to be smacked and kicked off. etc source: nj.com \| share:	50
		Is your teenage son constantly tired? If the answer is yes, a new study says he is likely headed for a life of crime source: upi.com \| share:	64
		You know you are in the back woods when a person driving a sleigh reports that a man used his "flying machine" to cause a massive stampede of 1,500 elk and the reporter writes is as "yup, we live in the future" source: thedrive.com \| share:	51
		Deputy suspended after satanic curse allegation source: mysuncoast.com \| share:	33
		Man facing felony charges after pulling gun at Chuck E. Cheese's. To be fair, it's a reasonable reaction to being surprised by an animatronic horror mouse source: freep.com \| share:	42
		Blind man tasered by police who mistook his white cane for a gun. This marks a troubling escalation in perceived violence by British police, who normally claim blind people were carrying Samurai swords before they got tazed source: home.bt.com \| share:	47
		This is a test of your knowledge of this week's weird news. This is only a test. Had this been an actual emergency, you'd be bonkers already. It's the Fark Weekly Weird News Quiz source: fark.com \| share:	21
		Festivus recycler loses load in New York source: bigstory.ap.org \| share:	10
		Photoshop this levitation trick source: gannett-cdn.com \| share:	23
		Meet the new chili that has all of the flavor of the habanero but none of the heat. Also has none of the point source: smallfarms.cornell.edu \| share:	140
		Dutch abortion boat detained by Guatemalan army. If only they'd had a rudder of some kind, they could have stayed at sea source: foxnews.com \| share:	72
		In another sign of how libby-lib the Church has become under Pope Francis, and a probable sign of the end times, Catholics are given permission to eat meat on Fridays during Lent. But only if you are a drunken, subhuman Irishman source: blogs.mprnews.org \| share:	65
		Man caught flashing his genitals in the Intercourse library will soon be thrust in the hole, begging for sweet release source: pennlive.com \| share:	44
		The Australian Navy is way more badass than you realize. Well, sure, they'd have to be to survive all the sharks, venomous eels, spiderfish, aquatic drop bears in the ocean down there source: foxtrotalpha.jalopnik.com \| share:	49
		Beer thief keeps returning to the same store to steal cases of Budweiser. Not sure if this deserves a hero or sick tag, so we'll just call him sad source: wgno.com \| share:	31
		It turns out Kim Jong Nam was auditioning for a sequel to The Rock source: nbcnews.com \| share:	89
		You don't tug on Superman's cape, you don't spit into the wind, you don't pull the mask off that old lone ranger and you don't shoot a bb gun at a cop outside of a Florida Walmart source: wftv.com \| share:	49
		Today's naked woman on a rampage in a church comes to us from the hamlet of Stamford, Connecticut. With why yes, she was likely high on drugs mugshot goodness source: newyork.cbslocal.com \| share:	73
		Latest 'decline of Western civilization' indicator: Oxford dictionary announces latest additions including: "yes" "squad goals" "drunk text" "craptacular" and "drink the haterade" source: upi.com \| share:	79
		Heroism can be found in the most unlikely of places. Yes, even inside a coffee table in Florida source: mynews13.com \| share:	29
		Finding a great fishing spot is great, but the owners of the pier would prefer you not use the same methods your dog does to "mark your spot". Thanks source: palmbeachpost.com \| share:	21
		Brand-new Maserati stolen when salesman falls for the old "Wanna see my new boat?" trick source: actionnewsjax.com \| share:	54
		And here's a list of moronic Canadian calls to 911 source: ctvnews.ca \| share:	65
		In 1970, a shot from a striking teamster driver caused an 18-wheel truck filled with 21 tons of dynamite to vaporize. With photos of the hole in the interstate, and windows broken from over 12 miles away source: news-leader.com \| share:	203
		Two killers who murdered their respective spouses marry each other in Nepalese prison. And the marriage was arranged by the groom's mother, who is also in prison for helping her son kill his first wife. Awwwww source: news.sky.com \| share:	46
		'Fake' psychic in trouble for posing as 'real' psychic. Let that sink in for a moment source: patheos.com \| share:	65
		If you abandoned a live chicken in the bathroom at the Cobourg McDonald's in Northumberland, Municipal Animal Services would like to tell you that unlike McNuggets, it was delicious source: northumberlandnews.com \| share:	48
		Photoshop this man and his beautiful balloon source: c1.staticflickr.com \| share:	29
		Dear Mr. Trump, We got the jobs, we don't have qualified applicants source: wtop.com \| share:	369
		The trial of the next batch of Branch Dildonians continues, featuring a video of these peaceful protestors discussing whether or not to execute federal employees and their families source: opb.org \| share:	46
		It's been 26 years. Whatever happened to Generation X? source: refinery29.uk \| share:	242
		"Get out of my country" -- Those were the last words a 32-year-old Indian-born engineer heard before being murdered inside a Kansas bar source: kansascity.com \| share:	390
		Border Patrol at JFK refuse to let passengers arriving on domestic flight deplane without showing their papers. Move along citizen, nothing to see here source: rollingstone.com \| share:	226
		Iowa legislator proposes bill to limit university hires to party loyalists source: aol.com \| share:	56
		Behold - the deep-sea giant WTF source: thesun.co.uk \| share:	49
		Just in case you were wondering, American troops are still in Iraq trying to clean up the mess from 2007, which was a cleanup from 2003, which was a cleanup from 1991 source: washingtonpost.com \| share:	54
		Lawmaker wants to remove Hillary Clinton's landing strip source: reuters.com \| share:	76
		Allo allo, what's all this then? Dearie, this man in't dead, he's merely restin'. Look, I tell ya, he got over it, and walked off. Put it in the report: "No offences were identified" source: getsurrey.co.uk \| share:	16
		Just when you thought heroes didn't exist, along comes a scientist who wants to eliminate hangovers by 2050 source: melmagazine.com \| share:	55
		Guy wears ladies' bras to work to "understand the brands he works with." That's his story and he's sticking to it source: chicagotribune.com \| share:	66

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