I’m knee deep in gaffer tape. Rolls and rolls of the stuff have secured two chunky ice-hockey shin pads to my Lycra-clad legs, and I’m wearing shoes that have been meticulously customised with dozens of tiny metal screws to stop me slipping. Before me, the St Lawrence river is a treacherous tapestry of chunky ice and fast-moving water, the backdrop of sub-zero cyan sky spiked by the majestic outline of Quebec City.
I’m about to sample ice canoeing, the latest high-octane winter activity that’s set to feature on every adrenaline junkie’s bucket list. Historically a means for locals to cross the water between the cities of Levis and Quebec, the old-school transport method has evolved since the 17th century into a fast-paced competitive sport. Now, thrill-seeking amateurs like myself can have a go with Canot à Glace Québec’s new tours, launched earlier this year.
The vast width of Quebec’s St Lawrence river (an average of 1km), combined with the region’s brutal climate creates huge slabs of ice that cover the water surface and float with the ever-changing currents. It is the only place in the world with the right conditions for the sport. If canoeing in Canada makes you think of a filtered Instagram shot of a wooden boat on a placid lake, then you’re wrong. So, so wrong.
Our French- and English-speaking instructors, Benjamin and Marie-Janic, are welder and student during the week, but on the weekends they are ice canoeing dons, with a brag-worthy collection of medals between them.
The reality of the challenge sinks in as we’re led to the snowy shores of the river, where a 12-metre, 165kg hunk of carbon fibre waits. The three of us rookies – myself and friends Adam and Sarah-Jane – are told to choose positions in the canoe. “If you fall in,” warns Marie-Janic, “do not panic. The water is far warmer than the air.” If?
The first few minutes on the river are relatively straightforward. We’re rowing backwards with Benjamin counting us through our strokes in a pattern that’s strangely hypnotic. But not for long. “Get ready for scootering!” he shouts. We launch ourselves from our seats and scramble our way along the centimetre-thin rim of the boat into an ungainly straddling position, with one leg in and one leg out of the boat and force our canoe over spiky, frozen blocks of ice.
Our farcical efforts continue for two thrilling, terrifying, hours. Benjamin warns us each time we approach obstacles (“ICE LEFT! ICE RIGHT!”) and we scooter about 20 times. I dunk myself to thigh-height regularly, nearly topple out the canoe on three others, and almost lop Marie-Janic’s head off with my paddle (which is covered in ice-slicing blades).
The icy wind is vicious, but it’s not to blame for the savage pain in my ears. That’s caused by the deafening crunch of the canoe hitting the ice – like a glass skyscraper shattering around me. I swear frantically, loudly and constantly, but no one hears. We learn how to do a race start too, which prompts hysterical nervous laughter. Sprinting our canoe across the top of a large flat slab of ice, we take it in turns to slip, fall and slide off in various directions across the marble-hard surface.
Just as I’m starting to flag, it’s time for a break. We park our canoe by ramming into a floating berg, and for the first time I can truly appreciate my surroundings. We’re totally alone on the river, with shafts of sunlight bouncing off jagged boulders of ice.
If Superman’s planet of Krypton was a real place, this would surely be it. “You could get these views by taking the 10-minute car ferry crossing,” Michel tells me, sipping a hot chocolate he’s brought for the ride, “but where’s the fun in that?”
• Canot à Glace Québec’s ice-canoeing sessions start at $175pp plus tax, including all clothing and equipment rental; available from mid-December to March, depending on weather. Visit quebecregion.com for more information
MORE WINTER EXTREME SPORTS
Skibiking, Austria
As the name suggests, riders sit on something that resembles a bicycle on skis –rather than wheels – and whizz around the slopes in this easy-to-learn ‘sport’. Austria is particularly skibike-friendly and Ski Koch in Obertauern offers lessons.
• From €65 for a two-hour lesson, skikoch.at
Ice diving, France
Whether you’re a total beginner or confident diver, for scuba diving with a difference, try plunging beneath thick frozen ice on a lake in Tignes. You can even do it at night to add to the thrill.
• From €95, tignesplongee.com
Snow kayaking, US
What it says on the tin: kayaking down a snowy slope, with a paddle to steer. Monarch Mountain in Colorado has an annual race day.
• Race entry $25, 9 April, skimonarch.com
Snowkiting, Sweden
This mix of snowboarding and kitesurfing (minus the waiting for a wave) can be practised on flat terrain, uphill and downhill. Åre Kiteschool has lessons for beginners and intermediates.
• From £82 for a three-hour introduction to £399 for three-day all-inclusive camp, arekiteskola.se
Ice surfing, Canada
Also called snofering, this is windsurfing on snow and ice. Lake Simcoe in Ontario has board rental and lessons.
• $35 an hour (rental) or $100 for a two-hour lesson, snowfer.com
Shovel racing, US
Riders sit on a snow shovel, facing the handle, and race down snowy hills. The world championships are held in Angel Fire resort, New Mexico. If jumping on a shovel isn’t your idea of fun, non-participants can enjoy the party, which has live music.
• 3-4 February, angelfireresort.com
Rachel Dixon
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