By Daisy Pearce
Last Saturday night, for the first time ever, I felt a sense of normalcy as I pulled on the Melbourne jumper. Not in the form of complacency, but a familiarity in my single-mindedness.
Unlike the first two weeks when there was so much hype and anticipation, I felt the unknowns had come and gone. I am also starting to become accustomed to the peripheral distractions of playing sport at this level.
The noise of the crowd became this subliminal energy source and the only time I considered the game being televised was when I had to jump to avoid tripping on the camera cord as I emerged from the three-quarter-time huddle.
For the first time it felt different from the once or twice-yearly exhibition games we have played previously, where I have always felt we had a responsibility to showcase women's football and prove our worth. This time it felt like I was there purely to win.
Situation normal: Daisy Pearce says she's now all about winning.Credit: Getty Images
It was also the first weekend I'd come across my Darebin Falcons VFL teammates, six of whom were playing for the Western Bulldogs. It provided an experiment to see just how far I was in pitting my allegiance against a handful of players who I have played with for the best part of a decade.
Bulldogs captain Katie Brennan, Aasta O'Connor, Kate Tyndall, Nicole Callinan. Not only have I played footy with these women for a long time, we have shared life's ups and downs and in some ways grown up together. Knowing each other so intimately means they can read your body language, they know your strengths as well as your insecurities on and off the field; it is almost like playing against yourself.
I have always been fascinated by what the dynamic must be like for brothers who play against each other in the AFL, or other sporting siblings such as the Williams sisters in tennis.
I used to find it strange coming up against my Darebin teammates in the exhibition games. Timing meant they were often played in the middle of our VFL finals series, so while the competitor in me was determined to beat them there was always a level of understanding that we had bigger things to achieve together the following week.
You never want to see anyone get injured, but there was a heightened concern if one of your Falcons teammates received a heavy hit, even if they were wearing a different coloured jumper that day. This was the first test of whether that sentiment still applied.
There was a moment late in the game that confirmed to me that things are different now. As Aasta O'Connor (with whom I have played seven seasons of senior football) and I faced off at the opening bounce of the fourth quarter, the ball spilled my way and I kicked to clear the stoppage. She barrelled into me and sent me flying backwards. We clashed heads and both ended up on the ground.
My immediate thought was to get the upper hand in the mind game of football by making sure I was first to get up. Once standing, I realised Aasta was dry retching and holding her head. I wasn't glad to see her hurt by any measure, but rather than worrying whether she was OK, as I may once have done, all I saw was an opportunity to outnumber the Bulldogs at the next contest and I took off.
The collision, and my reaction to it, answered my question. This is not a side that has been thrown together for a representative game and had a weekend to gel. As a playing group and entire club we have shared the excitement of being drafted, we've been challenged physically and mentally throughout pre-season and helped each other through. Already in this short season, we have shared in some of football's highs and lows.
So it's safe to say I am well and truly on this journey. Given AFLW is our new zenith, it comes as no surprise that my devotion has shifted, for as an athlete you are driven to succeed at the highest possible level. It just makes for an interesting time when, due to the current format, we all return to our formative clubs for VFL football during the traditional winter season.
The Melbourne journey continues on Saturday morning at Casey Fields as we take on a tough opponent in Carlton. Rather than relishing the freakish skills of another one of my old Darebin teammates in Darcy Vescio, we have the big task of trying to subdue her.
But the challenge of facing up to the best of the best is the beauty of sport at the highest level. AFLW means we now get to do it every weekend rather than only once or twice a year and it only makes me hungrier.