Whitney survives the Walford bus crash and soon feels well enough to snog her father-in-law Mick (Danny Dyer). Max Branning’s evil intentions were then revealed in EastEnders, by Jim Shelley
It was ‘Disaster Week’ in EastEnders. But then again aren’t they all?
In the end the real disaster was not Monday’s devastating, dramatic, bus crash though but the tragic lack of fatalities.
Surprisingly none of the residents were killed off (as is traditional in such soap catastrophes) let alone the most annoying, unpleasant, characters.
Anticlimax? It was ‘Disaster Week’ in EastEnders. In the end the real disaster was not Monday’s devastating, dramatic, bus crash though but the tragic lack of fatalities
My own Top Three would have been Sylvie Carter, Michelle Fowler, and Peter Beale, plus any of the children that have over-run the series recently – preferably Denny.
Everyone over at Emmerdale and Coronation Street must have been laughing: ‘call that a big budget accident?! You didn’t cull half of the cast !’
After two days of ambulances, firemen, and the Vic full of extras covered in dust and tomato ketchup only the bus driver copped it (from an EastEnders’ ‘art attack’).
Ultimately it was Red Herring Week as Tuesday’s candidates for cancelled contracts such as Denise, Dot, Johnny, Honey, Louise, Bex, Shakil, Kush, and his muvver Bonnie Langford all survived.
He'll be OK: Martin Fowler made it, even though he’d spent most of Tuesday wedged under the bus which crashed into the square
Martin Fowler made it, even though he’d spent most of Tuesday wedged under the bus, telling Stacey ‘I luff you’ and still whinging about plans to move the market.
He prevailed even though Albert Square’s inhabitants had taken it upon themselves to lift the bus up and down on top of him (several times) rather than wait for the Fire Brigade or the paramedics. (Don’t try this at home…)
We’d all seen enough episodes of Casualty to know that just because he seemed fine it didn’t mean that he was.
Martin had to have a scan to rule out ‘internal injuries’ and ‘damaged kidneys.’
Worried:He prevailed even though Albert Square’s inhabitants had taken it upon themselves to lift the bus up and down on top of him (several times)
Family plans: When he was fine, Stacey was so happy she told him: ‘I want another bay-bay. I want a Fowler
‘That’s serious right?’ Martin checked, suggesting he always was destined to be selling fruit and veg rather than have a career in medicine.
When he was fine, Stacey was so happy she told him: ‘I want another bay-bay. I want a Fowler. I want to know that I’ll always have a little part of you. We can do it properly this time.’
By which she meant not her having a kid with Kush.
Declaration: I want to know that I’ll always have a little part of you. We can do it properly this time,' Stacy told him
Whitney had been under there too presumably trapped by her enormous hoop earrings, having thrown herself under the bus rather than face another day married to Lee.
For a while her prospects didn’t look good either.
‘Whitney has no spinal injuries but she has reduced consciousness,’ Danny Dyer learnt from a doctor - who obviously didn’t know that everyone was like that in Albert Square.
Injuries: Whitney had been under there too presumably trapped by her enormous hoop earrings
Comfort: Danny Dyer had spent the whole episode doing his sleepy eye/moody growl magic on her, adding stroking her hair into his repertoire
Whitney recovered pretty quickly though. She was soon well enough to sit up in bed and snog her father-in-law
Who could really blame her?
Danny Dyer had spent the whole episode doing his sleepy eye/moody growl magic on her, adding stroking her hair into his repertoire.
Which of us could resist that? Certainly not Whit.
‘Lee don’t want to do nuffink no more !’ Whitney had confided to Danny Dyer on Monday. ‘I’m telling you somefink’s got to change. I can’t go no more.’
Shock: Whitney recovered pretty quickly though. She was soon well enough to sit up in bed and snog her father-in-law
Lovers of the Queen’s English knew how she felt.
‘I feel like I’ve been married to him for fifty years!’
A pretty horrific prospect…
‘You’re a rock to him and to me,’ Danny Dyer told her now, as she recovered (from the bus crash). ‘You’re a beautiful girl.’
At which point she miraculously sat up and snogged him.
The bad news for Whitney was that Denise happened to be watching from the corridor, and (even worse) that Lee then arrived.
Marriage problems: ‘Lee don’t want to do nuffink no more !’ Whitney had confided to Danny Dyer on Monday. ‘I’m telling you somefink’s got to change. I can’t go no more.’
‘I’m going to get you some balloons or something !’ he gabbled, reminding her why she preferred his dad. Lee’s happy pills must have been seriously strong if he thought the appropriate response when your missus survived being crushed under a bus was to buy her BALLOONS.
‘That should never have happened,’ Danny Dyer suggested while Lee was out (the kiss not the balloons). ‘It was surreal. We should just forget about it.’
That might be difficult – for us and the scriptwriters…
Trouble ahead: The bad news for Whitney was that Denise happened to be watching from the corridor, and (even worse) that Lee then arrived
With Friday’s FA Cup match sparing us a fourth installment, the week ended early, by taking an unexpected twist involving (Sex) Mad Max Branning.
He had already – improbably – been hailed as ‘the hero of the moment’, or rather ‘the ‘ero’ and applauded by everyone in The Vic for his role in rescuing Martin
Admittedly it had been Max’s idea for everyone (including blood-covered, traumatized, victims like Denise, Louise, and Bonnie Langford) to lift the bus up.
On the other hand, while they had all strained every sinew doing it he had just stood there, drinking whisky in his famous brown suit.
‘I realised I didn’t get a chance to thank you properly for saving Martin’s life,’ we heard Stacey say, leaving a message on Max’s mobile. ‘I know that it ain’t easy coming back here but I’m glad you did. I owe you big time. Me, and the whole community.’
Disaster week: With Friday’s FA Cup match sparing us a fourth installment, the week ended early, by taking an unexpected twist involving (Sex) Mad Max Branning
Sweet. It was just a shame that at that very minute he was up the Shard with Simon Williams (the sinister Chairman of Weyland and Co, an evil property company probably), twiddling his moustache as he plotted to take over Albert Square and re-develop it.
‘Finally it’s a place where people aspire to live. The trouble is, too many people have a foot in the past,’ he told Max, which was a bit rich on this show.
‘You’re a man after my own heart. Never let emotion get in the way of progress. So, what about the pub?’
‘It’s next on my list,’ muttered Max. ‘Let it burn for all I care.’ Whether Max was implying he had already orchestrated the bus crash wasn’t clear - or very likely.
But burning down The Queen Vic? Given that Walford was populated almost entirely by alcoholics that really would be a disaster.
Hero: Admittedly it had been Max’s idea for everyone (including blood-covered, traumatized, victims like Denise, Louise, and Bonnie Langford) to lift the bus up
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