A forgotten language
“There’s rosemary, that’s for remembrance … pansies, that’s for thoughts. There’s fennel for you, and columbines. There’s rue for you, and here’s some for me. And here’s a daisy for unhappy love.” In Hamlet, Ophelia expresses her feelings towards other characters in the play with these parting words and a flower for each. Flowers have always been powerful communicators, but they’ve lost the nuances they once had.
“There’s rosemary, that’s for remembrance … pansies, that’s for thoughts. There’s fennel for you, and columbines. There’s rue for you, and here’s some for me. And here’s a daisy for unhappy love.” In Hamlet, Ophelia expresses her feelings towards other characters in the play with these parting words and a flower for each. Flowers have always been powerful communicators, but they’ve lost the nuances they once had.
Many of the following meanings come from lists by Lady Mary Wortley Montagu, the wife of the British Ambassador to then Constantinople. She is credited with bringing the language of flowers to Europe in the late 1700s. This cryptic language delighted prudish Victorian England, providing a way of being quite naughty and vulgar, without actually speaking.
Many modern meanings have changed and vary from culture to culture. To avoid confusion, a graceful accompaniment to any gift of flowers would be a floral dictionary. The Language of Flowers by Mandy Kirkby is an updated comprehensive guide.
How to create a flower bouquet like a pro
Many modern meanings have changed and vary from culture to culture. To avoid confusion, a graceful accompaniment to any gift of flowers would be a floral dictionary. The Language of Flowers by Mandy Kirkby is an updated comprehensive guide.
How to create a flower bouquet like a pro
Roses
The rose has retained its reputation through the ages as the flower of love. But beware –colour is a loaded message. If your love is like Robbie Burns’ red, red rose, a single perfect crimson rose is an elegant and eloquent way to say those three little words we all want to hear. Pink roses are multi-taskers, for conveying love, gratitude, comfort, admiration – they are subtle messengers of our finer feelings. White roses symbolise new beginnings and hope for the future, which is why their angelic little faces often appear in bridal bouquets, along with Gypsophila, meaning ‘ours is a lasting love’.
This beautiful pink bloom is Rosa ‘Melody Parfume’, a hybrid tea rose.
Set a romantic pink tablescape
The rose has retained its reputation through the ages as the flower of love. But beware –colour is a loaded message. If your love is like Robbie Burns’ red, red rose, a single perfect crimson rose is an elegant and eloquent way to say those three little words we all want to hear. Pink roses are multi-taskers, for conveying love, gratitude, comfort, admiration – they are subtle messengers of our finer feelings. White roses symbolise new beginnings and hope for the future, which is why their angelic little faces often appear in bridal bouquets, along with Gypsophila, meaning ‘ours is a lasting love’.
This beautiful pink bloom is Rosa ‘Melody Parfume’, a hybrid tea rose.
Set a romantic pink tablescape
If you can’t say something nice … some things are best left unsaid. Be cautious with yellow roses. In Victorian times, they had negative vibes, symbolising jealousy, diminishing love, even infidelity. Happily, today yellow roses are given to convey friendship and celebration, and joyful feelings associated with sunshine and warmth.
Tip: Because of their ambiguity, it’s best to attach a little note explaining your intentions.
Tip: Because of their ambiguity, it’s best to attach a little note explaining your intentions.
Hydrangeas
Hydrangeas, as attractive as they are, could get you into all sorts of strife. The Victorians considered them uncomplimentary flowers, for boasters and cold-hearted lovers. Blue hydrangeas said ‘Although you’re beautiful, you’re heartless and vain’, and ‘No, I won’t marry you.’
Hydrangeas, as attractive as they are, could get you into all sorts of strife. The Victorians considered them uncomplimentary flowers, for boasters and cold-hearted lovers. Blue hydrangeas said ‘Although you’re beautiful, you’re heartless and vain’, and ‘No, I won’t marry you.’
Don’t flip out if you receive white hydrangeas. The colour white can contradict any negativity. Like many white flowers, they are a symbol of purity, grace and abundance – accept them with pleasure.
As ‘sorry’ seems to be the hardest word, today they are often sent as apology offerings, mixed with flowers holding a positive loving message. In Japan, pink means genuine love, because it resembles a beating heart. It can also mean ‘Please forgive my neglect.’
See more lovely white living rooms
As ‘sorry’ seems to be the hardest word, today they are often sent as apology offerings, mixed with flowers holding a positive loving message. In Japan, pink means genuine love, because it resembles a beating heart. It can also mean ‘Please forgive my neglect.’
See more lovely white living rooms
Sunflowers
An unusual floral offering, but one brimming with generous sentiments. Its strong upright stem speaks of energy and stamina, while its pursuit of the sun says, ‘Follow your dreams’. Throughout history, it has denoted power, loyalty and the infallible bonds of friendship. Victorians gave sunflowers as a message of gratitude; in China the wish is good luck and lasting happiness. If you plan on a Valentine’s Day surprise for someone, be aware that a sunflower is a platonic, not a passionate, gift.
Message: ‘Be strong, persevere, have a long and happy life.’
An unusual floral offering, but one brimming with generous sentiments. Its strong upright stem speaks of energy and stamina, while its pursuit of the sun says, ‘Follow your dreams’. Throughout history, it has denoted power, loyalty and the infallible bonds of friendship. Victorians gave sunflowers as a message of gratitude; in China the wish is good luck and lasting happiness. If you plan on a Valentine’s Day surprise for someone, be aware that a sunflower is a platonic, not a passionate, gift.
Message: ‘Be strong, persevere, have a long and happy life.’
Crocus
Truly a happy flower, crocuses emerge in spring, so won’t be around in Australia for Valentines’ Day, but there are plenty of other occasions when they are the perfect bloom. Do you want to express cheerfulness, glee, mirth? Are you celebrating the birthday of a friend who makes you laugh, or a young acquaintance with an important milestone coming up? Crocuses have long been linked to youthfulness and joy.
Truly a happy flower, crocuses emerge in spring, so won’t be around in Australia for Valentines’ Day, but there are plenty of other occasions when they are the perfect bloom. Do you want to express cheerfulness, glee, mirth? Are you celebrating the birthday of a friend who makes you laugh, or a young acquaintance with an important milestone coming up? Crocuses have long been linked to youthfulness and joy.
Sweet peas
Sweet peas were a floral favourite in the 1800s, often worn as buttonholes or in corsages. In 1817, John Keats described them as “on tip-toe for a flight, with wings of gentle flush o’er delicate white”. The fragrant butterfly-like flowers have a variety of meanings. Victorian suitors sent them to say thank you for a pleasant interlude, or to suggest an innocent flirtation. In France, they are a good omen for brides.
Myth has it that sweet peas will cause everyone around you to tell the truth and that a gift of sweet peas ‘will carry a pure woman past temptation’.
Sweet peas were a floral favourite in the 1800s, often worn as buttonholes or in corsages. In 1817, John Keats described them as “on tip-toe for a flight, with wings of gentle flush o’er delicate white”. The fragrant butterfly-like flowers have a variety of meanings. Victorian suitors sent them to say thank you for a pleasant interlude, or to suggest an innocent flirtation. In France, they are a good omen for brides.
Myth has it that sweet peas will cause everyone around you to tell the truth and that a gift of sweet peas ‘will carry a pure woman past temptation’.
Tulips
What a shame tulips aren’t around for Valentines’ Day in Australia, as they rival the red rose as loud and proud declarations of love. They announce that the giver has fallen in love at first sight and will risk all for love, and say ‘You are my perfect lover.’
How to make cut flowers last longer
What a shame tulips aren’t around for Valentines’ Day in Australia, as they rival the red rose as loud and proud declarations of love. They announce that the giver has fallen in love at first sight and will risk all for love, and say ‘You are my perfect lover.’
How to make cut flowers last longer
Forget-me-nots
The most unambiguous flower, these dainty blue sweethearts speak of undying love, loyalty and a wish to be remembered despite separation. They say ‘Remember our good memories, even if we’re not together’. If you still carry a flame for a lost love, tuck a few sprigs in among a variety of cottage garden flowers like lavender, cornflowers and buttercups.
The most unambiguous flower, these dainty blue sweethearts speak of undying love, loyalty and a wish to be remembered despite separation. They say ‘Remember our good memories, even if we’re not together’. If you still carry a flame for a lost love, tuck a few sprigs in among a variety of cottage garden flowers like lavender, cornflowers and buttercups.
Irises
Receiving irises is a bit like finding a note in the letter box saying there is a parcel at the post office, or a text saying you have a voice message. Follow it up by contacting the donor. Someone may be telling you how much your friendship means to them. Yellow irises are more ardent, and may indicate a more passionate regard.
Receiving irises is a bit like finding a note in the letter box saying there is a parcel at the post office, or a text saying you have a voice message. Follow it up by contacting the donor. Someone may be telling you how much your friendship means to them. Yellow irises are more ardent, and may indicate a more passionate regard.
Lilac
‘Do you still love me?’ is the perfumed lilac’s plaintive question. In Victorian floriography, it was linked to the innocence of first loves, a reminder of a treasured time, and widows wore lilac to honour a beloved spouse. ‘Make the most of love while it lasts,’ whispers the lilac, ‘it will be over too soon’.
‘Do you still love me?’ is the perfumed lilac’s plaintive question. In Victorian floriography, it was linked to the innocence of first loves, a reminder of a treasured time, and widows wore lilac to honour a beloved spouse. ‘Make the most of love while it lasts,’ whispers the lilac, ‘it will be over too soon’.
Lilies
Get excited if you receive a gift of calla lilies. Someone wants you to know you are a creature of winsome and unrivalled beauty. White means ‘I’m in heaven with you’, yellow says, ‘I’m walking on air’. Even without a secret meaning, these delicate satiny flowers (not technically lilies) are a lovely floral gesture. Send one already potted, to prolong the pleasure.
Get excited if you receive a gift of calla lilies. Someone wants you to know you are a creature of winsome and unrivalled beauty. White means ‘I’m in heaven with you’, yellow says, ‘I’m walking on air’. Even without a secret meaning, these delicate satiny flowers (not technically lilies) are a lovely floral gesture. Send one already potted, to prolong the pleasure.
The flamboyant daylily is a flirtatious flame-hearted minx, much like its recipient. In China, it is symbolic of filial devotion to one’s mother. It’s also an omen for expectant mothers who want a baby boy, when it is called I Nan meaning ‘suited for a boy’.
Lily-of-the-valley is all sweetness and light and celebrates the return of happy times. After a reconciliation, it says, ‘You have made my life complete”.
Lily-of-the-valley is all sweetness and light and celebrates the return of happy times. After a reconciliation, it says, ‘You have made my life complete”.
Columbines
These candy-coloured blooms are a mixed bag, depending who you ask. Generally, Victorians linked them to foolishness, because of their resemblance to a jester’s cap. Another meaning, for purple specimens, was ‘I am determined to win’. White may indicate trembling anxiety, which is more fitting to its Latin root, columba, meaning dove.
These candy-coloured blooms are a mixed bag, depending who you ask. Generally, Victorians linked them to foolishness, because of their resemblance to a jester’s cap. Another meaning, for purple specimens, was ‘I am determined to win’. White may indicate trembling anxiety, which is more fitting to its Latin root, columba, meaning dove.
Herbs
Although not as showy as some flowers, culinary herbs have lots to say. Rosemary has stood for remembrance since ancient times. Anzac Day marchers wear a poignant sprig on a hat or lapel to commemorate fallen comrades. Send a bunch of sweet-smelling herbs to a friend in need of something special – rosemary, marjoram (happiness), thyme (courage and strength), basil (good wishes), mint (virtue) and lemon balm (comfort, sympathy).
Tip: Dill can be a powerful charm against evil, or paradoxically, an indication of pure lust. Make sure the recipient knows which one you intend.
TELL US
Do certain flowers have specific sentimental meanings for you? Tell us about them in the Comments section.
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Although not as showy as some flowers, culinary herbs have lots to say. Rosemary has stood for remembrance since ancient times. Anzac Day marchers wear a poignant sprig on a hat or lapel to commemorate fallen comrades. Send a bunch of sweet-smelling herbs to a friend in need of something special – rosemary, marjoram (happiness), thyme (courage and strength), basil (good wishes), mint (virtue) and lemon balm (comfort, sympathy).
Tip: Dill can be a powerful charm against evil, or paradoxically, an indication of pure lust. Make sure the recipient knows which one you intend.
TELL US
Do certain flowers have specific sentimental meanings for you? Tell us about them in the Comments section.
MORE
Read more fun Houzz stories
This is a great article thank you.
Thank you Janet for featuring my photo of Columba (columbine). I just love getting flowers from my garden to display in my home as well. When company comes I choose a beautiful array of flowers as a centerpiece for our dining table. At times I use a shallow dish and add a little water, then I use flower heads and leaves to make a stunning arrangement. It keeps for days and adds cheer to my home. When my hostas are new and I need them to fill out, I don't let them flower for the first few years. I cut their buds on long stems and put them in a vase. They bloom inside and make a very classy centerpiece.