Dear Jess: The perils of being a wallflower during the festive season

Q. I'm very shy and I find this time of the year especially tricky as there is extra pressure to be social and catch up with lots of people. I've run out of excuses for not turning up to parties – there are only so many times I can say that my aunt is unwell! Please help.

A. Wonderful Wallflower, I understand your pain. I would much rather stay at home, eat rocky road and binge-watch an entire series of The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills than go out to a party. Perhaps one way of not becoming a total recluse is to pick just one or two parties to go to over this silly season.

Choose them based on your comfort level with the guest list and the length of time you could stay before politely leaving the gathering. Organise to arrive with another guest, so you have a wing-woman, and have some general questions ready to go. For instance, "Are you going away for the holidays?" "What do you do when you're not out at parties?" "Are you a cat or a dog person?" Most people love talking about themselves, so you can get away with just nodding your head.

Also, be careful regarding how much alcohol you drink. I tend to guzzle my champers if I'm nervous, so I make sure I have a big sparkly soft drink to hold. (It also gives me something to do with my hands!) Lastly, wear some glittery eye shadow – that always gives me a boost.