So much to do, so little time: your humble Devil is on 18DS's Blogger TV this evening from 9 till 10, should you be at a loose end...

Right in the wings

Oh dear, oh dear; UKIP seem to be very unhappy with Iain Dale's latest list of the most influential people on the Right. In fact, mutterings about "libellous statements" and "retractions" have reached the ear of your humble Devil.

The severe dissatisfaction concerns the entry for Nigel Farage.

48. NIGEL FARAGE MEP
    Leader, United Kingdom Independence Party
    
    Charismatic and unfailingly ebullient, Farage was seen as the man to take UKIP onto the next stage. Instead, he’s presided over a Party that has leaked members, is virtually bankrupt and failed in its stated aim to attract large numbers of Tories disaffected by Cameron’s soft approach to hard core issues.
    
    If Farage was doing well, he’d be in the top thirty on this list.

Firstly, the party has not "leaked members" under Farage's leadership: the membership is up, from 15,000 when he took over, to 16,000 now.

Furthermore, we now have a UKIP group in the House of Lords, with Lords Pearson of Rannoch and Willoughby de Broke hammering the government constantly and epecially on matters of EU law. Other defections include one of Thatcher's favourite economists, Sir Tim Congdon, and several important Tory regional organisers.

Hardly leaking members then.

As for being "virtually bankrupt"... well... Iain, as a Tory Party member, is hardly one to talk. Unlike almost all of the other parties, UKIP has no debts and no loans. Compared to the others, in fact, UKIP's finances are in rude health, despite the depredations of the Electoral Commission. As any government should, UKIP spends within its means.

Let's face it, UKIP have been successful enough that The Sunday Telegraph, led by the Daniel "Shitface" Foggo, made a concerted effort to destroy the party earlier this year, running damaging story after damaging story over a period of months (allegedly being fed information by certain disgruntled, former officers of the party).

And despite this, UKIP has, I repeat, gained members since Farage became leader. As such, Iain Dale's write up in The Telegraph is at best misleading and, at worst, libellous.

Meanwhile, your humble Devil is looking forward to attending the UKIP Conference at the weekend. I have obtained one of 18DS's citizen journalist video cameras to record the event, mainly because 18DS—prop. Iain Dale—is not, despite covering such massively high profile events as The English Democrats' AGM.

Now, that's what I call politics for adults...

UPDATE: I would like to point out that, personally, I couldn't give a shit where Farage came in the list; I hadn't even looked at it until a couple of UKIPpers contacted me about it.

Anyway, Iain has replied here.

Devil's Kitchen has had a right go HERE.

Ha! As Iain knows, the above is not a "right go" by my standards; but I'm sure he knows that.

Well, they used to have 27,000 members.

It is, of course, completely true that UKIP used to have more members; however, that is not what the article said. It said... [Emphasis mine.]

... he [Nigel Farage]’s presided over a Party that has leaked members...

... which is, as I have said, untrue.

They have well publicised financial troubles...

UKIP were rumoured to have only £5,000 in the bank. However, that does not mean that they are not solvent. In fact, there was a statement made at the time...

UK Independence Party chairman John Whittaker has urged party members not to be alarmed by the smears in the Sunday Telegraph today.

Dr Whittaker said that the article was "a disgraceful piece of journalism" and that it is nonsense that the party is ‘down to it's last £5,000’, as the newspaper alleges.

“During the court case considering Alan Bown’s donations, I was asked how much UKIP has in the bank. But this figure has nothing to do with the party’s solvency. Party expenditure is covered by income from donations and membership subscriptions and this is how it always has been.

“In March and April, we received £100,000 in response to an appeal to members. This hardly suggests that financial support for UKIP has dried up,” he said.

The Labour Party is £20 million in debt and the Tories had to sell their head office such was the dire state of their finances, yet no mention was made of this in the latest Sunday Telegraph tirade against UKIP. The UK Independence Party does not have any outstanding debts.

Now, you can choose whether to believe the journalist or the politician; a difficult choice, I know. However, I know Whittaker and, given what I know of him, I will, on this occasion, take the politician's word over that of a journo.

... and have failed to attract a large number of Tories over to them.

This is probably true. I can't tell. I don't think that UKIP ask you to put your previous allegiance on the form. However, Tory membership is still falling, I believe, and whilst they may not have come to UKIP, others have.

There were many on our judging panel who thought he shouldn't have even made the Top 100, let alone the Top 50. So if I were a UKIP supporter, I think I'd quit while I was ahead and thank me for even including Farage in the list in the first place.

Well, thank you from me, Iain. I am sure that other UKIP members will doff their cap in gratitude later. I know that Iain must have fought very hard to get Farage on the list, because here's another quote from Iain's article.

If Farage was doing well, he’d be in the top thirty on this list.

How badly does he have to do to not be included?

Look, I can see why Iain doesn't like UKIP—partly, I imagine, because of the threat to the Tory Party—and he's not alone; many of us indulge in party partisanship from time to time. however, whilst one could argue that Farage might have been lower, the idea that UKIP's leader should not be in the at all when that party's chief economist is cited at #97 and one of their peers at #86 is just silly.

And, in the end, it's just a list and I really cannot be bothered to waste quality rage on it.

What is the collective noun for tedious cunts?

The Dude points us to his latest appearance on 18DS; as expected he puts in a decent libertarian free-market case. However, if you want to see an example of a fucking stupid unreconstructed lunatic Labour cunt, may I suggest that you watch the thing and pay attention to this arsehole, Kerry Underwood?

One of the things that he says, when discussing the LibDems' fucking stupid proposals to "hammer the rich", is that £70,000 is the combined household income of a policeman and a teacher. And then the fat, ugly bastard—who, incidentally, has obviously never heard of dentists—said something along the following lines...

"And I don't think that anyone in the country would argue that teachers and the police are overpaid."

Actually, I would. Look at the recent exam results; look at the fact that last year 28,000 children left school with absolutely no qualifications whatso-fucking-ever. Were teachers to be assessed on results, they would be being fined for being too shit: in fact, I look forward to the day when people realise this and insist that teachers pay us for the shoddy fucking job that they do. Fuck them.

And the cocking police? For fuck's sake, they are a total waste of time and money. Obsessed only with pursuing mainly law-abiding people so that they can blame their shoddy fucking performance on "government targets" whilst they completely fail to get to grips with "real" crime, the police have utterly failed to do their job of protecting the citizens of this country from harm. Instead, they spent their time encouraging the state to lock us up without trial for ever longer periods, and pursuing petty vendettas against the very people that they should serve. So fuck them too.

Both policemen and teachers are—whether they want, in their fucking cowardly way, to blame the government or not—a complete waste of money. So yes, they are paid too much and, frankly, they can fuck off.

And I would tell Kerry Underwood to fuck off too, except that all the people who voted against allowing this fucking twerp to get anywhere near parliament have already done it for me.

On related note, your humble Devil was on 18DS the other week, in yet another fucking tedious programme; believe me, it is as exactly boring to participate in as it is to watch.

I am sick to death of being on programmes where everyone is in agreement: it's about as stimulating as being in an A Level class taken by a state school teacher. I am also bored shitless of being on programmes where we discuss things that are not my speciality; how about getting me to talk about whether we should be in the EU or not, guys? I have exciting things like figures, and studies, and some fucking knowledge of the subject. And, fuck, if I have to discuss cocking Iraq, something that I have very little opinion on (bar feeling that it was unprovoked aggression, and thus against libertarian principles) and less knowledge of (notice how I'm not a Milblogger?) one more fucking time...

So, anyway, unless I get an exceptional offer of something vaguely interesting, you may consider that appearance on 18DS to be my last.

Tim Montgomery: hypocrite

Tory talking heads Iain Dale and Tim Montgomerie can be seen on this Sky News clip, talking about the new internet advertising campaign launched by the Conservatives.

Nine different banner adverts are being placed on fifteen different sites over the next five days. These sites include Facebook, Lycos, daily national newspapers plus many other web distributors. The total number of viewers is predicted to be 21 million. Each of the nine adverts outline specific policy ideas and are interactive – clicking on the advert takes you through to Conservatives.com.

What is a little surprising is Tim Montgomerie's assertion that the Tories do not update their internet sites. There is an element of truth here, but not only is it utterly irrelevent to the debate—since the ads link to the main Conservative site—but also somewhat hypocritical.

Let us remind ourselves that Montgomerie ostensibly left 18DoughtyStreet in order to pursue his internet campaiging. Personally, I suspect that he left because he was totally shit—and an authoritarian cunt to boot—and everyone kept telling him so. But that's just my opinion. Obviously.

Still, keeping on topic, let us look at Mr Montgomerie's record of campaigning websites, shall we?

First up, we have Conservative Home's list of 100 Tory Policies. Well, actually, the number that they've managed to get to is 45. Unfortunately, because the people at ConHome are complete chimps and only include the time on the post timestamps, we are unable to find out what date they last posted to this. Memo to ConHome: put fucking dates on your timestamps, you fuckwits.

How about Tim Mongomerie's CentreRight website? Well, there's been no update there since March 16. Whoops.

How about the famous Chameleon Army? It was trailed on ConHome on April 24 2006, when Tim wrote this...

Labour's next chameleon party political broadcast airs on Thursday. Before then - at 3pm on Wednesday - ConservativeHome.com will be launching the ChameleonArmy.com. Be sure to visit then...

Erm... ChameleonArmy.com just shows a holding page. Fuck me, that's pretty impressive: at least the Tories managed to launch their damn sites, fucking shit though many of them are.

Or how about Tim's Play Political site? What this did was essentially scrub YouTube for vaguely political clips. Launched in April and... er... died in June. Bummer.

Or how about another Montgomerie site?—The Fisk. First post is dated as being January and the last post... Well, the last post seems to have been sounded in March. Oh dear, oh dear. But surely that must be it? I mean, how many campaigns can one cunt kill?

Well, there are two sites that Montgomerie launched that are not even there anymore: there is only a holding page shown for Labour Do Not Do... (http://www.labourdonotdo.com) and a 404 Error for First They Came (http://www.firsttheycame.com). Oh dear, how many more senseless deaths must we witness?

Well, in a brilliant move, Tim Montgomerie has managed to kill a campaign before it was even supposed to be launched! That's right, The Wrong Man site was supposed to launch on September 4th (that's yesterday, folks) and yet visiting the URL, http://www.thewrongman.org/, gives you—yes, you've guessed it—a holding page.

So, with all due respect, Tim, (and there ain't much due, you god-bothering fuckwit) I really do not think that you, of all people, should be commenting on the Tories' lack of ability to update their bloody sites (and, in any case, Webcameron was last updated only a couple of days ago).

Why don't you just shut the fuck up and stop pretending to be some kind of web expert. And, for fuck's sake, really don't try to launch anymore dead-in-the-water campaign sites; they are the equivalent of politicians: huge though the environment is in which they live (in the case of your sites, oh so briefly), they are still a complete waste of fucking space.

Piss off: your opinions are utterly valueless, you twat.

In your humble Devil's final piece for 18DS, he wonders if he is a bad man for wondering, mostly in jest, whether it was actually the government who placed that bomb...

In news that has delighted Drs Rant and Crippen, as well as myself and my impecunious Athenian pal, Patsy Hewitt resigned last night. Good—fuck off, Patsy, you lying shitbag.

My fourth post for 18DS is little more than a final, valedictory swipe at Darling Patsy, written for no other reason than that I can.

A couple of blogs

Last night I ate a scorpion.

No, there's no "and then I woke up" ending to this: I did actually eat a chocolate-covered scorpion at this restaurant. And a cricket, a couple of locusts, some crocodile wrapped in vine-leaves, kangeroo and some zebra. And something else; wildebeast I think. Yes, I ate a gnu. A gnother gnu. Gnu, gnu, I gnashed my teeth on you. It's all the fault of Friday Cities.

Anyway, a couple of blogs arising from FCLers. The Oracle is an Auxiliary working in a hospital somewhere in the south east, and is quite amusing on occasion. Auxiliaries are those poor bastards that do all of those things which nurses no longer have to, such as wiping bottoms and washing patients. I did it for a year and it's back-breaking, exhausting work.

For those of you who appreciate food, I'd like to recommend Ambrosia and Nectar. American Annemarie is now a dedicated Londoner and she really does know her food. She was weighing in with the insects last night with the rest of us, and no doubt you will shortly see a review of the restaurant on her blog.

Now, I'm off to find something to write about for 18DS, and then I shall be back. In the meantime, why not make TEBAF Margot happy and watch all of the exciting propaganda informative videos on the USSR EU Youtube Channel?

My second guest-blog for 18DS is now up.

The floods are a direct result of the government's failure to live up to its promises to maintain our flood defences.

This week your humble Devil is guest-blogging every day at 18DoughtyStreet.

My first post, on doctors as "financial commodities" is up now.

Do we assume that Shane Greer, recently appointed Executive Director of the Young Britons' Foundation, will no longer be presenting at 18 Doughty Street?

Top Ten Things Which Make Me Change Channel
...

5. “Hello, and welcome to Vox Politix. My name's Shane Greer...” [click]

Woah, Iain! Put those claws away...

UPDATE: how strange, then, that I should receive an email from the YBF, annoucing that Iain Dale has joined the YBF Advisory Board...

UPDATE 2: Iain points out that it was a joke. Apologies, my bad...

Clueless: starring Jane Griffiths

Last night, your humble Devil was on 18DS with a former Labour MP called Jane Griffiths. Now, Jane has a blog and, in her latest entry, she finishes off with the following statement.

I never cease to be amazed that people can attribute views to others, without asking. What is wrong with asking what a person's views are?

Well, luckily, in this case, we don't need to. Last night, on Blogger TV, she happily described herself as a "Stalinist". Let us leave aside the outrage that it would have engendered had I declared myself to be an "unashamed Hitlerist" and procede to Jane's blog statement.

I am internationalist, anti-totalitarian and pro-democracy everywhere in the world. I also love life and fun.

Well, actually, she happily described how she voted for the Iraq war because she was an "interventionalist"; Stalin was too. He happily intervened in Poland, Czechoslovakia, Bulgaria, Hungary and numerous other places too. So at least Jane is consistent.

But how on earth can she describe herself as a Stalinist and "anti-totalitarian and pro-democracy"? The answer is that you can't; these things are incompatible. So, Jane, as requested, I'm asking you your views: are you a Stalinist or are you anti-totalitarian and pro-democracy? Which one of your claims is the lie, Jane?

(Now, I know that, having been a politician, you are probably not very adept at telling the difference between the truth and a lie, but won't you give it a go?)

Jane also couldn't see what all the fuss what about the victory of the so-called Metric Martyrs*. I assume that Jane is probably pro-EU: are you Jane? As a NuLabour supporter one must assume that she is and this would make total sense: after all, as a Stalinist, Jane must be heartily in favour of mass-murdering, unelected bureacracies.

Actually, Jane just came over as being slightly confused and out of her depth, politically. She was in favour of central planning, but also in favour of localism. She wanted local authorities to have more power, but wanted central government to keep a hold of the purse-strings.

Increasingly, I find that I less and less time and patience for the incoherent ramblings of the Left; they seem unable to grasp that the last hundred years or so has not only shown up their ideology to be utterly morally bankrupt, no matter how they lay claim to the opposite, but also totally inefficient: it just doesn't work.

How long can these fuckwits keep closing their eyes and ignoring this very crucial fucking point?



* Their victory is not as total as you might imagine. I shall write on it later, but check out Trixy's commentary.

For those interested, by the way, your humble Devil will once more be gracing the sofa at 18 Doughty Street tonight.

So tune in for Blogger TV from 9pm; and then I'm on until midnight...

Your humble Devil is appearing on 18DS's Blogger TV tonight, with James Cleverley, Andy Mayer and Recess Monkey. Should be interesting as we are all of different political persuasions: UKIP, Tory, LibDem and Labour.

18DS in Time magazine

Courtesy of Adrian Monck (who, I must admit, does do a nice line in retaliatory put-downs), I see that Time has done a piece on 18DS and your humble Devil is pictured with Monk and Croydonian.


Now I think about it, I do remember a photographer hanging around at some point. Can that really be the best photo that he took? Or does Time's agenda mean that we all have to look like loonies?

Oh, and good quote from Iain Dale.

Not that Doughty Street is opposed to bias. "Do you know the problem with balance?" asks Dale. "It's boring." Quite a few Britons are starting to agree.

Yup.

Just to update my coterie of visual admirers, I am on 18DoughtyStreet for three hours this coming Monday, from 9pm until midnight. Yes, I am expecting to answer some probing questions on UKIP's finances!

Tune in for your dose of Devil...

Stephen Norris: all mouth and no trousers

Interviewed on 18DoughtyStreet by Iain Dale, Steve "Shagger" Norris has said some very sensible things about the EU.

“The institution of the European Union which I think is corrupted and corrupting and largely redundant…if it were put to me that it were practicable the intention of Cameron’s Conservative party to withdraw ourselves formally from the European Union that wouldn’t cause me a single moment’s distress.
...

So, I'm a thoroughly-signed up Eurosceptic..."

Whilst this is all good stuff, strangely I can't find Steve's name on the list of those signed up to Better Off Out. I imagine that this is merely an oversight and that Norris will soon be apppearing on that illustrious list (a list which includes, I'm heartened to see, Mr Gavin Ayling).

Of course, if this is not an oversight and Norris has not signed up to Better Off Out, one might be forced to conclude that Shagger is all mouth and no trousers and, as such, as much of a waste of time as that fat fool, Letwin (of whom, more later).

And so it rumbles on and on and on...

Matt Sinclair has written a typically well-reasoned response to this flame war between Guido, Iain and Tim Ireland.

At first Ireland was supposed to be trying to influence the future of the blogosphere and prevent it imitating Fawkes' way of doing things but with his hyper-sensitive response to perceived assaults elsewhere on the blogosphere (not deleting a comment doesn't imply endorsing it) he is widening this into a left/right divide in blogs that is a real shame. One of the best things about blogging are those rare moments of genuine engagement and debate across partisan lines, I would cite my ongoing debate about historical nationalism with Westminster Wisdom as an excellent example of this, such debate cannot take place against a backdrop of such hostility. Ireland may feel that he is the one who has been wronged but surely he can see it is within his power, after Iain made a call to end things, to stop the madness. Any offences Guido may have committed against blogging are surely better ignored than answered with this unseemly confrontation.

As this vendetta is pursued it looks more and more bizarre and is inviting some denunciations which I understand must be hurtful. What might have been an attempt to point out the flaws in the style of one prominent blogger has become close to frenzy and is creating a vicious cycle of unpleasant accusations. It should end.

Quite. However, at risk of fanning these flames, I was nosily looking over Iain's shoulder on 18DS last night (you can see your humble Devil at work here) and could see the barrage of emails from Tim Ireland coming in (including the ones that Iain did not read out) and your humble Devil—who has thus far refused to take any particular side—is going to go out on a limb and state the following:

Tim Ireland is a mad, stalking cunt who should fuck off and die rather than continue his petty and unpleasant hounding of people on the most spurious grounds possible. Anyone who listens to or in any way endorses this insane bastard is getting themselves onto the wrong side of one of the most childish fucking arguments your humble Devil has ever seen.

For fuck's sake, Ireland, GROW UP. You have totally invalidated any serious points that you may have had by acting like a spoilt, obsessive child. If you have a problem with Guido and Dale digging into the Smith Institute, go and expose the Policy Exchange: since you have a reputation as a guy who gets off his arse and does things, go and retaliate in kind and not with this pathetic monomania.

Instead, you allow your hangers-on (Chicken Yoghurt, Tygerland and Ministry Of Truth amongst others), whose motives are precisely as partisan as Iain and Guido's, to do your work for you; this is the kind of behaviour that you condemned your targets for, remember?

Your motives and methods are no purer than theirs, you hypocrite, so do us all a favour and drown yourself in a bucket of snot, OK?

And that is absolutely my last word on the subject.

UPDATE: having said that, of course, Unity has a very reasoned post which—damn his Labour-supporting hide!—I pretty much agree with, as per. As an aside, I find it interesting that I often broadly agree (and would happily have a drink) with people like ChickenYoghurt and Unity more often than some of the right-wing loons and fools that occupy the 'sphere.

Chin chin!

Your humble Devil is on 18DS again tomorrow night: I will be twitching my tail on Blogger TV, with Rachel North, Stephen Pollard and Ben Sherread. EDITED: to remove drink-fuelled and entirely gratuitously offensive comments.

Tune in, o my boys and girls: anyone have any questions they want asked?

Caroline Hunt: did you say "Hunt" or...?

I am watching 18DS and it featurs a young Tory blogger called Caroline Hunt; having not heard of her before, I thought that I'd have a look at her blog. With her being a proud member of Conservative Future, I was pretty sure that I would be able to find some piece of fucking idiocy and I wasn't disappointed; since I seem to be on a bit of a UKIP trip at the moment, let's take her recent post on that to start with. I do apologise if I end up repeating myself, but that is because these fucking Tory cunts don't seem to be able to get this shit into their fat heads.

So as I'm sure you've seen Liam Fox made some comments on GMTV this morning saying (essentially) a vote for UKIP is a vote for Labour.

Yes, well, I dealt with the Idiot Fuck-Dwarf's load of fucking nonsense. But Caroline describes herself as "The 56th best Conservative blog on the Internet" so I am sure that her opinions will be of a much higher quality. Ha!

Now this is a subject I care about deeply.

I bet you do, Caroline, but I am pretty fucking sure that you will write something passionate and completely ill-informed that parrots your blinkered leadership's view. Shall we find out, kids?

I cannot for the life of me understand why anyone, anyone would vote UKIP at the next General Election. We have had a Labour government for ten years now. I must be right in thinking that there is not one member of UKIP who would like a Labour government for any longer.

Yeah, but Caro, my little poppet, I see no fucking difference between Cameron's Tories and NuLabour so I actually couldn't give two shits as to which one of these high-tax, Europhile, statist, bastard parties gets in, frankly.

Labour are not interested in their views on Europe, Labour are not interested in their views on immigration, Labour do not support any of the ream of reactionary policies Farage has drawn up to try and increase the sham of suggesting that UKIP are anything other than a single issue party with a one issue agenda - to withdraw from the EU.

Caroline is obviously a fuckwit of the very first water: either that, or Caroline Hunt is, in fact, a David Cameron sock-puppet. I shall quote Trixy on this, since she's spot on (and she fisks our Caro beautifully: go read).

It's also a bit rich for you to say that: 'Labour do not support any of the ream of reactionary policies Farage has drawn up to try and increase the sham of suggesting that UKIP are anything other than a single issue party with a one issue agenda - to withdraw from the EU.'

That's a contradictory comment in itself. If there are other policies, how can it be a single issue party? And why attack Labour for not supporting them when Nu Tories don't either?

Our Caroline is almost as consistent and logical in her arguments as Polly Toynbee.

Now it is not Conservative party policy to withdraw from the EU. However it is not Labour party policy or Lib Dem party policy either.

Which is why people want to vote UKIP (or the BNP) rather than one of the three main parties, you fucking twit.

There are however Conservative MP's who support withdrawal from the EU.

Yeah. And. So. What?

What good is that when it is Tory Party policy—as stated by their Chairman, Francis Maude—to remain within the EU?

It is not the Conservative Party's view that we should be out of the European Union.

Further, Tory MPs have been warned that if they sign up to Better Off Out, or if they are EUsceptic, then they will not get into the Shadow Cabinet.

I'm not aware of any in the other two parties.

Really, love? Tell you what, why don't you check the Better Off Out website, eh? You might find out that Labour's Austin Mitchell MP is a signatory. Sure, there are more Conservatives, but that is, as I pointed out, irrelevant whilst the party leadership is so pro-EU.

All Conservative MP's are deeply concerned about the undemocratic, bureaucratic waste of money that is the current form of the EU.

Yup, but Cameron wants to give yet more power, especially in "green" areas, to the EU.

Deeply anti-EU MEP's like Roger Helmer and Dan Hannan stand under the Conservative banner.

Erm... Up to a point, Lord Copper. To quote Trixy again:
As for Helmer and Hannan. Well, the fact that Helmer was thrown out of the EPP for doing what he was elected to do is illustrative of the true feelings in the Tory party towards anyone with EUsceptic leanings.

Helmer was given the whip back after he wrote a letter to Cameron saying he would join UKIP unless the whip was restored, so clearly he thinks that there is a reason to vote UKIP.
Or, as Wikipedia puts it:

He was first elected to the European Parliament in 1999 as a Conservative Party MEP, and re-elected in 2004. He was subsequently suspended from the party on 26 May 2005 after voting against party instructions on a motion to censure the European Commission and openly criticising his delegation leader, Timothy Kirkhope, in a parliamentary debate [1]. As of 13 September 2006, he has had the Conservative party whip restored[2]. However, he still sits as a Non-attached Member, and not in the EPP-ED Group to which all other Conservative MEPs belong.

So, Helmer doesn't actually sit along with the other Tories. Ho hum...

So if you were UKIP's target audience why on earth would you vote for a party that has not and will not win a single seat at Westminster and will absolutely positively never form a government?

I'm sorry, Caroline, do you know something that I don't? Is there a ban on voting for UKIP? Are UKIP candidates banned from Westminster even if they get elected?

Look, you stupid fuck, if people vote for UKIP in sufficient numbers then they will get MPs. For fuck's sake, woman, that's what democracy is about!

Especially since by voting for them 8 times out of 10 you are reducing the number of votes for the only party other than the Labour party that can form a government at the next general election?

Really? Why's that? Is there some law that says only the Tories or Labour can form a government? Er, I don't think so...

Frankly they deserve what they get if they let in another Labour government that won't have the balls to stand up to the EU.

Oh, right. The party who took us into the EEC, who signed the Maastricht Treaty, who refused to hold a referendum on the Euro, are the ones who are going to "stand up to the EU", are they? Yeah, right.

However if they have any sense they'll vote for the only party that comes close to representing their views - the Conservative Party.

Riiiiiiight.

Look, Caro, you silly bitch, why I support UKIP is laid out in detail in this post, but why don't I summarise it for you?

1. I want us to leave the EU, for reasons too numerous to mention. The Tories don't, UKIP do.


2. I support worldwide free trade as I believe that it makes us all richer. The Tories don't, being pro-EU, and UKIP do.


3. I am against state funding of political parties. The Tories are pro-, UKIP are against.


4. I am against the ID Cards and the National Identity Database. The Tories have only recently decided that they are against them. UKIP have always opposed the idea.


5. I am a libertarian and believe in freedom of association. The Tories, by opposing the Catholic Church over the gay adoption row, have amply demonstrated that they do not. UKIP supported the Catholic Church's right to an opt-out.


6. I believe in selection in schools (along with the majority of the rest of people in this country) and in privatising all schools and funding them through a voucher system. The Tories dropped support for grammar schools, selection and for vouchers, whereas UKIP support my views.


7. Most of all, Caroline, I believe in being ruled by people that I have elected and not in being ruled by a bunch of unelected bureacrats in Brussels, you twat.

Essentially, Caroline, I want to vote UKIP because I agree with their views and I agree with almost nothing that Cameron's Conservatives have ever said. I am fed up voting for the Tories simply because they are less awful than Labour: I want to vote for a political party that I agree with for once.

I have been relatively kind to Caroline, because she is only wee; however, since she is "The 56th best Conservative blog on the Internet" and yet spouts this kind of utter bollocks, and because Polly is in hibernation, your humble Devil will be returning to the subject of Ms Hunt...

We all know it's futile, but it's satisfying none the less

Well, the denizens of 18DoughtyStreet should be happy with the House of Lords.

An EU bid to make internet broadcasters subject to the same laws as traditional television is "seriously misguided", a House of Lords committee has said.

Proposals risk damaging the new media industry, pushing broadcasters to set up outside Europe, the committee said.
...

The EC argues that new broadcasters are effectively competing for viewers and advertising and should be subject to the same rules.

But the all-party Lords European Union Committee rejected this, saying it was not the role of regulation to protect established broadcasters from new competition operating under different business models.

It doesn't make any difference, because it'll be put through anyway and we'll be forced to implement it, but at least the Lords are trying.

Mr Cameron issued a statement yesterday.

I... er... firmly believe that Europe, I mean, the EU is a force for good. Or rather it's not, but when I'm king... I mean, Prime Minister then I will make them be nice and that. And, if they aren't nice to me, then I'll scweam and scweam until I'm sick. Er... What was this law about again...?

Mr Cameron is 24 a prick.