The expert's guide to packing up a house. Video by Alistair Walsh.
If you’re under 30 years old, it’s perfectly acceptable to ask a friend to help you move.
It’s likely you don’t have a lot of stuff – at least not a four-bedroom house full – and you have probably helped out others in your 20s and are seeking a return of the favour.
Once you reach age 30, however, asking your friends for this kind of favour is a bit of a no-go zone. Here’s why.
Over 30? Asking a friend to help you shift just looks, well, cheap. Photo: Joselito M Briones – Stocksy
Moving is awful. It’s stressful on your mind and your body.
When you’re in your 30s, 40s, or older, you already have enough stress going on in your daily life. You don’t need to be guilted into “helping a mate” at this age.
Also, asking for this kind of arduous, physical help after 30 makes you appear – for want of a better word – cheap.
It doesn’t cost a lot to hire movers for a few hours; if you’re only moving across town, a few hundred dollars will do it. And it will preserve sanity for all involved.
There are some exceptions to this “over 30” rule. If you have a friend with a van, truck, or even tow-bar on their car (if you don’t have one), you can ask for their help moving one or two large items.
Whether it’s a bed and a sofa or a dining table with chairs, let’s call this “single load” help.
It involves a time commitment of 1-2 hours, and should be followed immediately by a beer or a cool glass of wine.
As far as working bees go, these are a different ball game together.
A working bee can be a fun, productive way to bond with friends. You could hold one to paint a few walls, or to get your garden under control for the new season.
A few rules apply to you, as the host of a working bee.
Firstly, all “bees” should be at your house voluntarily, for as few or as many hours as they choose.
All bees must also be provided with continual refreshments throughout the day.
This means you’ll need to prepare sandwiches and bake (muffins, slices, and other items that can be eaten without plates or cutlery are a must) and have them on-hand all day.
You may also want to provide an easy sit-down lunch, and adequate shade if you’re working in the heat.
Tea, coffee, and water should be on tap, and because it’s summer, also consider something cold and fresh like homemade lemonade. Don’t forget sun-hats and sunscreen, either.
Lastly, remember the core purpose of a working bee: community.
That means if you hold one at your house with five bees, you should return the favours and attend five(-ish) other events if asked.
You needn’t be a stickler on that number, but if you’re to request others’ non-paid help on communal activities like this, it’s your duty to pay it forward.
This article originally appeared on stuff.co.nz