Anjem Choudary has finally been sentenced to 5 and a half years at HM Prison Slade under his real name, Norman Stanley Felcher. He is isolated on the nonce wing so people don’t have to listen to all that shit he comes out with. He is allowed a copy of the Koran, Motorhead CDs, and a mucky book, and is let out for 1 hour a day to play on the prison bouncy castle, but not if it’s raining when he has to stay in and do puzzles instead.
Anjem Choudary enjoying a joke!
Former fanny magnet Choudary has been allowed to form a vocal trio, The Candy Apple Steamers (that’s gross, Ed.) and their versions of ‘Where The Girls Are,’ ‘It’s Raining Men’ and ‘I’m Coming Out!’ have been a wow with the sex offenders on their wing!
Anjem: Candy Makers & Loving It!’
Choudary’s supporters have included this fucking idiot, Jamaal Uddin, the exotic dancer formerly known as Cheeky Peeches, who converted to Choudary’s version of Islam because he was a fat ginger who always got picked last at football.
Choudary has also been getting some expert tips from an unnamed adviser (below) on how to make friends in prison:
‘Your face is like a big minge anyway, they’ll love you (long time)!’
He will not be missed.
Be Seeing You!