‘South Park’ Grapples With President Trump’s Plan of ‘F*cking Them All to Death’

Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton may have written both acceptance and concession speeches for Tuesday night, but it appears Trey Parker and Matt Stone may have made too many assumptions about the outcome of the race ahead of this week’s South Park.

Wednesday’s episode, titled “Oh Jeez,” was a late replacement for an episode that carried the title “The Very First Gentleman” and introduced Bill Clinton as the real winner of the 2016 election. But after Trump’s unexpected victory, South Park had to rethink their narrative at the last minute and come to grips with what the shocking news means for both the world of their show and the country at large.

Over the course of this 20^th season, South Park has cast Mr. Garrison as its “giant douchebag” against the actual Hillary Clinton as its “turd sandwich.” The creators told The Daily Beast this fall that was because they didn’t want to give Trump the “satisfaction” of seeing himself on screen, especially after what they did to him last season. But now they may be regretting more or less letting him off the hook.

Much like the real Republican candidate, as a Trump stand-in Mr. Garrison repeatedly attempted to end his campaign by saying and doing a series of increasingly outrageous things. But every time, Hillary Clinton failed to properly capitalize on his massive failures. “If you vote me in as president, I’ll seriously throw up and have lost all faith in humanity,” he told his supporters at one point. They only like him more. 

Tonight’s episode began with an Election Night party full of shell-shocked viewers, including Randy, who says, “This isn’t how it was supposed to happen,” as the anchor calls the race for Mr. Garrison. In the background, a man shoots himself in the head.

“The people have spoken. Just as J.J. Abrams did with Star Wars, I will make this country great again!” Mr. Garrison said. With his running mate Caitlyn Jenner by his side, he announced, “All my efforts this past week have paid off. And now, let’s begin… fucking them all to death!”

In South Park’s world, the election was “stolen” from Hillary Clinton, who enlisted Kyle’s dad, aka Skankhunt42, to prevent the president-elect from taking the oath of office. And Mr. Garrison was despondent in his bathrobe at home, insisting that he had a change of heart and actually wants to be president.

Back on Member Berries, Randy falls back in line with Mr. Garrison. But like the president-elect, he’s no longer fired-up and ready to go, but rather subdued under the spell of forces that would prefer America as it used to be.

“Well, I don’t know about you guys, but I sure am excited,” Randy said in monotone, eyes staring straight ahead. “America is going to be great again.” When his angsty teenage daughter Shelly tells him this country is going to “suck for four years,” he reassured her: “We’ve learned that women can be anything. Except for president.”

Instead of introducing America’s first First Gentleman, P.C. Principal instead brings Bill Clinton into the South Park Elementary gym to do a song and dance promotion for his new “Gentleman’s Club” with Bill Cosby. Apparently, this was a joke that was just too good to lose despite Hillary Clinton’s loss. Later, the “nearly gentleman” stopped by Butters’ house to give him an important talk about what’s really going on.

“Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned,” Clinton tells Butters. “And believe me, my wife is a crazy bitch. She and all the other women in the world are about to get payback, and we are all completely fucked. It’s my fault, really. I’ve done things my whole life that gradually broke her spirit. And now that she’s lost everything, let me assure you, she is pissed.”