Whats it like being Half-White and Half-Asian? Thats an important question for a changing America. With the flood of interracial relationships, and with mixed-race being the fastest growing race in America, there are going to be quite a few Hapa males around. White-Asian marriages seem to be the most common mix. If close to 50% of Asian women marry White men, and 50% of them have males as kids, that means 1 in 4 Asian-American women are going to have a Hapa male like me as a son. So yeah Hapa males are kind of a big deal when 25% of Asian-American women have them as kids.
So what is it like? Humiliation, degradation, terror, fear, embarrassment, shame, self-hated, angst, debasement, sadness, hopelessness, pain, anger, rage, etc etc need I go on? You can’t imagine the internal conflict. The brutal civil war inside all Hapa males. The Hapa Paradox. We exist because Asian men are humiliated and emasculated, and yet we are Asian males. We are at war with ourselves from birth. The idea that an Asian man like me, is genetically 50% white, and carries ONLY the white-male Y chromosome. The Asian Y-chromosome is dead in me. Asian maleness is dead in me. I’m a Eunuch. I’m an Asian male inside a dead Asian male. That is what it means to be half-white, half-asian. All the way back in the 2nd grade, thats how I defined my identity. I would introduce my essay by saying My name is SEML and I’m half white and half asian. So when I was only 7 years old, that was already who I was. My very identity. The thing that made me me, for better or worse. And life has shown it is only for worse. The law of life for the Hapa male is that Murphy was an optimist, everything that can’t go wrong, will go wrong. Has gone wrong. Life is a daily rape for the Hapa male. One long humiliation. One long emasculation. It feels like acid runs through my veins, like my skeleton wants to jump out of my body and strangle me. That is what it means to be an Eurasian male. The very term Hapa is a colonial term from Hawaii. A slur. And what else do Hapas deserve but slurs? So its appropriate that Hapa pride means taking pride in a slur. Non-Hapas can not imagine what it is like to be a Hapa. To be the Asian son of a white man and Asian woman. It is an unimaginable hell. Dante’s Inferno could not devise a more cruel torture. Its like being strangled from the inside.
What kind of life do WM/AFs think they can give their Asian-looking sons? What goes through their heads, when the DR says “its a boy”? What right do they think they have to rule over an Asian man? What makes a white man and an asian woman a parent to an asian man? How can they curse an innocent infant with such a miserable life that they have created? they make this world a shitty place to be an Asian male, and they they create an Asian male. It is the worst form of child abuse.
Its bad enough being an Asian-American male watching WM/AF from the outside. Can you imagine being a Hapa male, feeling WM/AF from the INSIDE? Feeling WM/AF inside you? It is a rape. Life is just a long torture and rape for the Hapa male. Hated by all. Asian males hate hapa males too, when they realize they are hapa. But Asian men are right to hate Hapas. When they look at me, all they can see is WM/AF. Can I blame Asian men for hating me, when I hate myself far far far more for the exact same reason? If they knew more about me, they would hate me more. To the white race, I’m just yellow subhuman scum. The best I can do is get on my knees, and constantly advertise my white dad, and beg for a modicum of acceptance. The good guys hate me because I’m evil, the bad guys hate me because they are evil. Hapas are unloveable monsters. Freaks. Beasts. Subhuman scum. We wander this earth, hounded from all directions. Strangers in every land. Homeless. Raceless. Strangers to strangers. We are ghosts without bodies. And then I think 1/4 children Asian women produce are in my exact same situation. To be hapa is to be hapless. The one good thing about being hapa is you have 1 WM/AF in the world you can hold hostage- your own parents. WM/AFs don’t have to give a shit what their Asian brothers, fathers, family and friends think. They do have to give a little crap what their own son thinks. So its a big deal to them, when the offspring of WM/AF calls out WM/AF to their face. That is the one power in the world, Hapas possess, the power to be a terrible son. Hows that for a revolt against Confucian filial piety?
Will you call me a racist if I say I hate white men? How can you when I am just as white as I am Asian? If I’m to give the devil his due, and say one nice thing about white men it is that his sperm produces beautiful daughters, while Asian sperm produces repulsive she-beasts.
A whiteboy writes:”WHITE GUYS AND ASIAN GIRLS ARE THE FUTURE , TOGETHER THEY ARE GOING TO CREATE A EURASIAN SUPER RACE OF BEAUTIFUL AND HYPERINTELLIGENT CHILDREN” Glad to be part of that future of beautiful and intelligent Eurasian males, who get treated by the world as Asians and thus look at WM/AFs including their own parents the same way bitter Asian guys do.
So anyway thats just a little window into the world of the Hapa man, one of the fastest growing populations in 21st century America!
Your not a monster. With all the pain your going through, I thought it was really sweet that you still care about making white girls laugh, and entertaining them and making them happy even if you think you have no chance with them. That so cute. Its great that your so willing to give yourself, even with all the shit your going through. The commentors on this blog only focus on how angry you are at those who have hurt you, and ignore how sweet you are to the girls you like. I think its great that you’ve devoted your life to making white girls laugh, and I’m sure someday your kindness will be repayed. Even though I’m white, and the whole Asian thing doesn’t effect me at all, reading your blog has made me really pissed at Asian women, and I never really noticed it the same way before. But I will never look at Asian women the same way again, after seeing what they did to a sweet boy like you. So don’t lose heart. I think if more white girls knew what you had to go through, they would feel it just as much as you do.
You are an idiot. He is just jealous of Asian women. It is not Asian women who created this monster. It is the white race who created this monster. Eurasians living in Asia don’t have half of his issues, problems. They don’t have similar identity crisis. Yes, Asian women are racist, but whites are much more racist than Asians. I am crying for the author of the rant. Whites killed you. They killed a person in him that he could have become. He will never be happy.
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Man are you are such a tool. Won’t share comments that hurt your feelings. You’re just a sorry ass little fag.
If your accusing me blocking your comments, I found it in the spam queue a few hours after you posted it. Funny thing about wordpress, they even sent my own comment on my own blog to the spam queue, as well, thats how I found yours. But I unspammed it right away.
You didn’t even bother to check if your comment had been posted before complaining?
Anyway if your implying that I’m censoring comments to spare my feelings, just take a look at the comments here, its 95% me-bashing.
I especially welcome and encourage comments from people like you in WM/AF relationships, since it is of interest to see how they feel about Hapa sons of WM/Af like me.
White males in WM/AF marriages hate it if their son looks like an asian cuz it looks like his wife had an affair with a chinese guy.
Quite embarrassing indeed.
And on the contrary, White males in WM/AF marriages LOVE it if their daughter looks like an asian cuz then they will magnify their asian fever and ultimately they will molest her.
Google “chomo”… mostly creepy white guy perverts… If you ever meet a white guy who watches anime, keep your asian daughter away from him!!
You are sick.
I found your blog through StuffWhitePeopleLike since I don’t like that website and StuffBlackPeopleDontLike directed me to it. Here is a language learning software you should use to learn Mandarin or Japanese — > http://www.rosettastone.com/
After learning the language leave the USA and go to your mother’s country (China, Japan, Korea) and have babies with an Asian girl if you’d like.
Hapa guy,
What is your take on the string of white guy vs. asian girl murders lately?
http://www.komonews.com/news/local/125378118.html
Ezekiel Watkins stabs Kathy Chou in the neck.
http://abcnews.go.com/US/annie-le-case-police-arrest-ray-clark-murder/story?id=8598755
Raymond Clark rapes / murders Annie Le and stuffs her in a wall at Yale
http://www.cp24.com/servlet/an/local/CTVNews/20110422/110422plea/20110422/?hub=CP24Home
Steven Krys strangles Qian Liu to death at York University
http://articles.nydailynews.com/2009-09-25/news/17932293_1_ex-porn-murderer-reality
Brian Lee Randone chokes and beats Felicia Tang to death in Monrovia, CA
You need to get over yourself and stop obsessing on race. In fact, why don’t you spend some time in, say, China where Asian men are ascendant (over China — and more) and there are plenty of Asian women who would dig you?
Do you by any chance live in America? I’m pretty sure America fucks biracial people right up, simply because of the heavy focus on race there seems to be in that country, and the ‘one drop rule’. I feel very lucky to have been raised in a Western nation in which this whole racial focus thing does not exist. In the UK it is not seen as an identifier in the slightest and generally goes unnoticed when individuals meet. I actually encouraged my brother to stay far, far away from the US when he expressed wishes to attend University there. In fact, I wouldn’t even visit the country, except maybe Hawaii.
There was an American guy in my English classes last year and I avoided him like the plague. The first thing he noticed about everyone was race and I remember him referring to Obama as a ‘Black president’ because he looked Black. Here in the UK, the idea that a biracial person is of a certain race because they look more that way is ridiculous … I recall re-telling the experience to others and them finding it very funny. Don’t get me wrong, British people are still to some degree ignorant and aren’t 100% clued up on mixed race identity, but most do not consider a biracial person ‘just Black’ or ‘just Asian’ because they look closer to Asian/Black than White (most often the case).
Seriously, if you’re in the States consider leaving. It would probably be beneficial to your mental health, and I’m not being funny with you at all.
You wouldn’t visit the states…but you think the one drop policy is still relevant? Most black people in the states identify as black, but most of them are part white from generations ago. It seems like you implying that people who are mixed but chose to identify specifically with one part of their heritage are ignorant bigots. If Obama identifies himself as black, can you blame this American in your English class for also identifying him as black? and I’d bet there is a far higher percentage of Americans in interracial relationships than in then UK where you all seem to have a fabulous relationship with middle eastern immigrants.
Oops, just noted ‘Asian-American’. Sorry, it’s 1.30AM here1
Yeah, your a sorry piece of shit… might as well jump off a bridge or shoot yourself. My son is a Anglo-Asian male. He is incredibly handsome. Naturally talented, and loved by everyone. I only wish I could be like him!
You were born into your body to learn that your soul has no race or color. Find peace in your soul and let go of the illusion of who you think you are and the labels other give. Your life mirrors the inner reality you choose to believe in. Focus on pleasant experiences past, present, future. Peace be with you, from another mixed kid🙂
‘your a sorry piece of shit…’
In the English language, “you are” is contracted “you’re.” Please refrain from using the possessive form “your” when the contraction is required.
‘ might as well jump off a bridge or shoot yourself.’
Suicide is not the answer.
Life without a mate sucks. Men can go without sex if they have an emotionally supportive mate.
Also, the blogger here is probably young. Young men have a lot of sexual frustration. It diminishes as one ages. At forty, one might regret a lonely life, but one won’t care as much about sex.
‘You were born into your body to learn that your soul has no race or color. Find peace in your soul and let go of the illusion of who you think you are and the labels other give. Your life mirrors the inner reality you choose to believe in. Focus on pleasant experiences past, present, future.’
That sounds like an optimistic plan. But it’s better than the recommendation of suicide.
Positive thinking works up to a point. I don’t know if it can handle the stress of involuntary celibacy and social alienation. Perhaps a combination of positive thinking and physical action might help.
For my part, I just got back from the gym. I find that regular workouts distract me from my social alienation. Maybe it would work for you.
Wow, I understand what you’re saying, though i am not a guy. I`m eurasian too, and ever since i was born I wasn`t white, and I wasn`t asian. When I was with my “white friends” i didn’t belong because they saw me as asian. The same applies to the opposite. Once when i went biking with my mother some stranges came up to me as a 6 year old and threw many racial comments at us. I was lost at how to respond, and I was hurt as I’m sure my mother was. Whenever I went to an asian gathering or a festival from my mother’s heritage I heard others talking about me. They would laugh and I felt humiliated. They spoke in another language that they thought I couldn’t understand but of course I did. After all i am asian, if not only half. The things I heard when I was little wasn’t nice, and because my parents separated I couldn’t explain why I was the way I was. Why did you people want a 6 year old to answer to ”What are you parents? DO.YOU.UNDERSTAND.? What are you? Are you lost, you don’t seen to belong…” It hurt. I didn’t fit in. I had never met another eurasian person-and wouldn’t for several more years, I did not know how to relate, and i was alone. I didn’t know who I was, and I was bullied, in turn I did the same to others so I wouldn’t get hurt. I put up a wall and no on could get in. I guess after a while I got sick of who I had become. I decided that I didn’t want to be alone anymore and I decided that would be king and accepting. I decided that I would live my life by NEVER judging another by their race, appearance, or beliefs. It took years for people to accept me. I’m in h.s. now and somehow I fit in, all of my friends are of different races.
I guess what I’m trying to say is that what and who you see yourself as is up to you. If you let others tell you who you are, or rather what you’re not it’s going to hurt and affect you, not them. If you take it to heart you’ll waste your time. Hatred is a double sided blade, where when you think that you are hurting the other person you are really hurting yourself. Trust me I hurt myself for 5 years of my life, and I was alone because of it. I know. Just because you are eurasian does not mean you are worth any less, if anything it means that you are more. You came about because two people put their races aside and overcame this trial. I believe that though things seem tough for you right now, you’ll pull through. You are worth it, i believe so personally. Please don’t hate yourself. It may be tough but don’t give up, someday you will make a change, or someone will. You will realise that being mixed, if anything is something that once overcomed will make you stronger. Take care, and excuse me if I have offended you in any way.
Why don’t you just date other Eurasians?
Eurasian women hate Hapa guys, even more than Asian girls do
You’re ignorant, man. I’m half Asian/half White as well. But did it ever occur to you that someone like us has a Asian father and white mother? That is exactly what I have and love it. I’m handsome (if I do say so myself) and graduated from an Ivy League school. Your comments are extremely telling and anyone with half a brain can infer that you are some disgruntled teenager with no perspective or life experience. What right do you have to stereotype and generalize all of us. You are sad and should not be allowed to call yourself a half Asian.
“Eurasian women hate Hapa guys, even more than Asian girls do”
Another false stereotype. I have been with a lot of different girls and they all love the way I look. Well, save Black women, I just never found them attractive. You need to learn to love the person you are and get over the fact that you feel slighted by your parents, who by the way must have been terrible to allow such animosity to build up in their own son. Your Internet privileges should be revoked for expressing such ignorant thoughts. BTW, I don’t blame you, I blame your parent’s for the utter and complete failure they have in a son. Your problem is not ethnic, rather cognitive.
I’ve always made clear that there is a HUGE difference between WM/AF and AM/WF. In fact AM/WF is the exact opposite of WM/AF and one strategy for WM/AF Hapas is to lie and claim they are AM/WF Hapas. The problem is not being mixed, but the specific issues that create the WM/AF imbalance.
I’m an eurasian too. I used to feel like I didn’t belong to anything and existing was an eternal torture. But after years of self hate, and just simply living a life,
I realized how beautiful we are. You may not believe what I’m telling you now, but you will realize this much later in your life. We don’t belong to any race, and we don’t need to belong to any. I don’t normally tell anyone this, because this will cause a storm of jealousy among people who are not eurasians. We are the most beautiful kind of all.
Its great to read comments that aren’t politically correct; “We (eurasians) are the most beautiful kind of all,” and “..I just never found them (black women) attractive.” Too many people on the internet mindlessly peddle their “pc” views as if they were interviewing for a job. If there’s any place where you can be brutally honest, it’s right here, on the internet.
I’m an Asian guy in New York City. I’m decent looking and successful in my profession. When I’m out on the town I make it a point to approach and speak with Asian women. Frequently, the women I’ve encountered brush me off by saying that they don’t date Asian men, when all they really have to say is that they’re with someone.This kind of meanness is uncalled for and I really do believe that the more integrated and accepted Asian women are into white society the more they hate Asian men and treat them the way other races would. I wouldn’t be surprised if they start calling me chink and gook, while they canoodle with their white men. But, I won’t be cowed. I’m going to keep approaching these women and remind them that they are Asian like me. My friends and I even find it amusing and play a game guessing how often I will be rejected. But, the city is not entirely filled with these types of Asian women. A friend recently started dating an Asian girl who actually said that she would never date a white guy no matter how handsome he was. It seems hard to believe, but I think that because she has many brothers she may actually have some feeling for the Asian man.
Forget about Asian women, dude. Hit on white girls. They’re hotter. Higher mate value.
Wow man thats really sad, you are waiting for the day that an asian girl calls you a chink. What is this world coming to?
Growing up as a half white/asian male in Los Angeles, it definitely has been hard trying to find which groups you would identify with. I do agree with the author of this article in the sense that there will be internal struggles at a younger age. As i got into my 20’s i learned to accept and just be who i am.
In my case being mixed does work out as far as female attraction. Asian women know that im mixed so i apparently look ‘exotic’ in their eyes. Latin women think im hispanic so i appeal to them as well. I’m sure this is the case for most asian/white mixed men.
I grew up in the 60s in Canada, and my dad was Chinese, mom was European, and while there were some racists then, I was comfortable with who I was. So if you have issues, talk to your parents, for it’s not society that causes you to lie about your heritage, it’s your own thoughts.
I think your mix are amongst the most beautiful species to roam the earth and when i recognize it i thank the forces that be for gracing this world. i am just a boring slavic/latin mix. born and raised in NYC i get off in the exotics. old school thinking is no mystery to me. it just plays on fear. don’t fall for it.
firstly you should really chill on that self wallowing & pity partying you sound like a Korean soap opera star, life’s hard nuff as is and there will never be a shortage of lifeshit to deal with. I always found my mixture worked for me. Whities believe whatever the hell I say because we’re always the smart labcoats on every CSI spinoff show, or even on hit shows like Walking Dead so they think I spend all my time getting my geek on, and prob think I’m sagely wise too like Mr. Miagi in that I sit around and meditate on the harmonious universe all my spare time, so I’m cool with that. Truth of reality is hummies will always judge you based on superflous criteria – appearances, dress, race, age, income bracket, but they quickly change their initial thoughts of you depending on you. Why do you even care if there’s a large populace of asian haters out there? or even half asian haters? there’s only one person chiefly who you need lovin from and that starts with the self. no matter how hard you try there’ll always be those who want to bring you down, dislike you, put you down and they’ll grab at shit like how chinky eyed you are or how endowed your junk is. Funny I always find its the white guy haters who diss on asian/half asian males equipment sizes and not the ladies.
Your writing makes me laugh. I’m from China, and being an Eurasian male is the best privilege that one can ever get in that country. Being mixed is beautiful, but I understand what you feel. Coming to America from China, I felt that I lost all of my privileges as the dominant “Yellow Male.” It also helped me realize how ignorant I was to people that were under-privileged, create understanding and develop sympathy for them.
It seems that you are playing a harder game here in the US, comparing with your white counterparts, but it’s also more rewarding if you win.
Good luck and keep writing, man!
You sir, are an idiot. I am a “hapa” male who lives in Australia, absolutely embraces both my asian ethnicity, my English born fathers cultural heritage and have a incredibly beautiful “white”(the whitest of white having blonde hair and blue eyes) girlfriend… You sound like an absolutely miserable c****. I have found my complete sense personal identity and would rather be a halfy than just asian or just white. If you think that hapa males are unattractive I am (not to sell my self) proof that is completely untrue as I work as a model professionally. I have several male Hapas that are born with Asian fathers and White mothers and are also very good looking… I really feel sorry for you. Perhaps the reason you feel this deep seeded self conflict and rage is because of your up-bringing. I suppose that I can relate to some sections of this on a minuscule level. The question “Where are you from?”, has always made me feel as if i was not normal. But I have learnt who I am and when I answer that, I say “My father is originally from England, my mother from Japan, and I’m Australian. I truly feel sorry for you and hope that you find yourself.
Bro, it’s really not that bad
Hey mate, you should immigrate to Australia. Heaps of beautiful white girls are interested in Asian fellahs here. Even the daughter of the former Prime Minister (we don’t have a President) hooked up with an Asian dude, and they’ll have beautiful, powerful, WF / AM kids. I reckon Australia is more genuinely multicultural than America, although foreigners usually have the impression we are a bunch or racists. I’m a white guy, I study Mandarin Chinese and speak Japanese (in connection with my post-grad research, not for picking-up!), and who knows, its not out of the question that one day I could end up siring a eurasian son. But although your tirade is eye-opening (and you’ve got an amusing way of hamming it up!), I don’t think for a second that a Eurasian male of the future will be so self-loathing. Mate, probably part of the reason us pasty white guys are apparently so attracted by asian/eurasian women is that (unconsciously) we don’t want to our progeny’s progeny to be out-competed by high-achieving asians and weeded out of the gene pool! Go easy on us, and hold your chin up: part-asian is the way of the future!
LMFAO @ [Qoute] “Hapas are unloveable monsters. Freaks. Beasts. Subhuman scum. We wander this earth, hounded from all directions. Strangers in every land. Homeless. Raceless. Strangers to strangers” [End Qoute]
Loved your post, it’s really funny- all the dramatics haha. You need to build your confidence up… MAJORLY!!! Let that personality shine bright. Chin up and get back on that saddle!
Head for Australia, the land down under will be the Eurasian homeland in a few generations.
Eurasians from all over the world are heading there.
Caucasian Australians seem more prepared to hook up with Asians than Americans or Europeans, although some may debate this. In any case, there are proportionaly more Asians in Australia than in America or Europe.
Stopover in Singapore or KL which both have prominent Eurasian numbers.
But it is Australia where Eurasians feel the most comfortable.
I hear people talk about Vancouver and Australia like they are Asian Utopias. Vancouver is the WM/AF capital of the world. cephascjy has a ton of comments on what a shithole Singapore is!
As for Australia, the situation is so bad that a Newspaper published an article Why don’t Aussie girls date Asian men?
http://blogs.theage.com.au/lifestyle/allmenareliars/archives/2006/10/_back_in_august.html
Rather than beating yourself up and having to explain AM/WF vs. WM/AF and having to rationalize it for yourself, I think it is important to realize that the two time tested ways for successful hapas have been:
1) New method: Embrace your minority culture. As you already know, whites and asians will respect you more if you are a white looking asian-american person than an asian looking white person.
2) Old method: Pass for white. Obviously this will only work for people who look mostly white.
Although I am not Eurasian (I’m an Asian Female), I can sympathize with you because I live in the states. I have to say that USA is very white, male-dominated so I can only imagine the contradictions you face everyday when you can’t enjoy the same privileges and opportunities as your WF because you look more Asian. Since you and the male figure in your home cannot identify with each other, there will always be a disconnect in your relationship as father and son. Things only worsen if you should have an AM that formed her union based on a hatred against Asian men, which you happen to look more like and share similar experiences with in the states. In other words, you are lost and cannot identify with either of your parents. I do pray that you keep your chin up and may you meet someone who accepts you for you.
Its interesting hos in your post WF = White Father and AM = Asian Mother. In general those acronyms stand for White Female and Asian Man. So I was confused for a moment.
I’m a WM/ AF male baby living in NZ, and i’m proud of who I am. I don’t dwell on the negative thoughts of being a halfy. Not many people are racist in NZ and Australia and the Pacific region.
Yes, I did get bullied for ‘being asian’ in Primary school, but it wasn’t really much. I stood up to them and they now fear me. You need to do the same and stand up for yourself. Stop whining and start doing something, you little shit.
And you probably shouldn’t stick to a stereotype group, mix around with the people you are friends with and you won’t even realize or care about your own steriotype.
I also feel sorry for you. You are at the age where you are able to stand up for yourself. Hell, if I can do it at 9, then you can.
haha what the fuck. be proud of who you are… who gives a shit if your half asian, half white. I’m the same, think of it as an advantage instead of a disadvantage.
I’m a WM/AF male from the U.S. Girls tell me I’m “exotic” looking and handsome, grown women too *cougar alert* lol. I think you should be proud of who you are
I see Asian women who go with white men as whores too, and the white guys who go for asian women are losers. Birds of the same feather and all that.
However try not to be so hard on urself. It’s hardly your fault how and of whom you were born.
Hey dude, keep your head up. Hit the gym, get your cardio on and build your mental prowess, the ladies will flock to ya. I’m a half white \ half asian fella myself here in America. The dominant culture over here perpetuates Anglo Saxon decent as the standard of beauty, it took me a while to recognize the asian side of myself as well but as soon as I did, it becomes a lot easier to love yourself. Don’t let other peoples racial profiling keep you from recognizing and creating your own esteem. Remember that at the end of the day were all human. Beauty is subjective and most of the aesthetic aspects are skin deep. Looking back at my life I wouldn’t have it any other way. I promise when you start to love yourself your life will really start to flourish. Reality is that some will love you and some won’t, if they don’t based on looks then fuck em. My life is not hell, I’m damn lucky, I actually don’t have enough time in the day to talk/socialize with all the people I want to. Rid yourself of limiting beliefs. Treasure those that treasure you. Make yourself into who you want to be.
I have an asian mom and a white dad and i have to say, i cant relate to most of the stuff you are saying. I dont really have a problem fitting in anywhere i go, its all about how you carry yourself and interact with people. For example lets take a black person, if he walks up to me and starts talking ghetto trash that i cant understand, im going to shoo him away. However, if that same man came up to me and held a highly intelligent and punctual conversation, i wuld treat and look at him the same way i would anybody else, the same goes for any race. Contrary to what you believe this is how most ople actually are, unless you live in southern mississipi or some shit. Hell, i went to a private all boys boarding school in mississippi for 6 yrs, one of the most racist places on earth and i never had a problem with any race shit. As for dating i have no problem with dating or attracting females of the asian or white races. It sounds like you are mentally set in your ways, a lot of this shit is all in your head and you have self esteem issues. -cooper
I’m a girl from a white mom and asian dad. I have had a completely different experience than you. Though I’ve had negative experiences in the outside world, with not fitting in, always being different, I don’t understand your struggle within yourself, with your genes and how you were born. Maybe because with the asian dad and white mom, theres not really any of that asian fetish that white males sometimes have? I know that I came from a marriage with people from two competely different countries, and they love each other a lot.. and I feel proud of that. even though I get some negativity outside of my life at home, I’m still glad I am the way I am. And what do you mean in the third to last paragraph? Not to be arrogant, but I like to think that I’m a pretty attractive girl.
@ keiththegreen
“I grew up in the 60s in Canada, and my dad was Chinese, mom was European, and while there were some racists then, I was comfortable with who I was. So if you have issues, talk to your parents, for it’s not society that causes you to lie about your heritage, it’s your own thoughts.”
The dynamics you grew up in are totally different. If this guy is that angry then obviously it cant come from “his own thoughts”. Yes it has to do with society. Now he can’t “blame it all” on society since we must take responsibility for our decision, but society does bring AM down. Your parents probably affirmed you as a kid which is crucial for a child’s self-esteem and evolution. Your parents obviously didnt scorn AM. On top of that, you are CANADIAN!! He, on the other hand grew up in AMERICA, with parents who didnt respect his group. You guys dont have the same issues. Some in common, but not exactly the same. YOU could run to your parents and find comfort when society was treating you harshly, he is raised by the very people that despise his group.
I have seen healthy aw/wm couples but trust when I say that it is extra rare. Most WM dating/marrying AW despise AM (and look down on asians in general), which means their wives’ father and brothers. They go on and say that AM are “feminine”, laugh at their looks behind their backs, I have seen comments from WM on the internet calling the very women they pursued “gooks” in certain circumstances?? I know a WM who adopted an asian boy with his wife (AW) and doesnt have a problem calling AM mysoginists in public although his son is a full AM (and an adult now) himself. I have seen a WM cracking up at the mention of “Seoul’, cause he thinks his city is better. And its not just WM, but mostly. Now everytime I see these couples with a son, I often wonder what that son sees, hears and how he feels.
You can’t project your situation onto his, you guys dont live in the same world at all.
Finally, a video for all of us halfies that explains our problems dealing with people! If your of mixed ethnicity, you’re going to love this video. Like and share for all the other halfies out there!
http://www.qltyctrl.com/16-things-never-say-mixed-race-people-true/
I understand where the author of this blog is coming from. Over the years it has become very clear to me that BOTH many asian women and many white men have issues, mainly that asian women do not like their own facial features and want eurasian looking children, while many white men (and men in general) often want a submissive, subservient and “exotic looking” female. This leads to a jacked up, abusive, dysfunctional inter-ethnic family dynamic, where everyone in the family is valued for primarily the WRONG reasons, or maybe not valued at all.
I am not saying that true love is not involved in these relationships, but it is obvious that many of these couples get together for selfish, superficial reasons. Then we, as mixed children, have to sort out the mental trash of our parents, and it takes a long time to value ourselves for being whole people. It is not uncommon for mixed race children to experience varying degrees of both negative projection and rejection by their non-mixed parents, and the parents will be in total denial about it. The parents, who are NOT mixed, have no idea what it is like to actually grow up mixed themselves. Also, the non-mixed parents and extended family will often pull their mixed children in different cultural directions, each wanting them to be a part of their respective cultures. It becomes a tug of war without the parents realizing it, or being in denial about it. Then you add the social stigma of being the product of WM/AF, and rejection or anger from both cultures, as well as anyone in society that does not agree with inter-ethnic marriage, and you see there is a whole lot of trash that mixed children/adults, especially WM/AF mixes, have to deal with.
Furthermore, the nonsense that asian women and white men say about how their children will be “genetically smarter and better looking”, and that they are “improving the human race” is a lie. It is, in fact, a form of discrimination, especially when they attempt to quote scientific articles proving the superiority of mixed race. It is often a shallow and uneasy justification for relationships that have been built primarily on social programming and superficiality.
At this point, the only way for me to reduce the resentment, is to accept that there is mental illness in the world, and that many WM/AF relationships are the product of an unhealthy society, and although I was born into this society, it does not have to dictate how I feel about myself!
I’m a half asian male just like you and I think this is BS.
I’ve never felt the way you do. NEVER. “We are at war with ourselves from birth”. Speak for yourself. Every person and situation is different.
what SEL writes is the most enlightening thing i have ever read.
If you are a hapa who looks totally white then you dont know what its like. so stfu
Dummy’s Guide to Asian Girls with White Fever
The WHIGGIE (White Guy Groupie)
A brief profile of Asian girls afflicted with “White Fever”
ORIGINS: A subset of women of Asian ethnicity, usually found residing in major U.S. cities, although they have been known to appear overseas occasionally. Closely related to their cousins, Yellow Cabs (Japan), Gwei-Po’s (Hong Kong), Sarong Party girls (Singapore), Twinkies and Bananas.
NOT TO BE CONUSED WITH: Intelligent, emotionally-secure women who are free of identity problems, self-hate, racial prejudice and chips on their shoulders.
CHARACTER TRAITS
– Poorly developed self-identity. Pathetically insecure with themselves and their ethnicity.
– Resentment of father’s traditional, authoritarian upbringing (whether real or perceived).
– Brainwashed into believing that they, as AF’s, are more desirable than other women in exotic lotus blossom kinda way. Willingness to pander to western media sexual stereotypes of AF’s, which they perceive as marketing advantage.
– Thoroughly whitewashed. Desperate need to fit into “mainstream” (i.e. white) society and to distance themselves from their Asian heritage. Racial inferiority complex.
– Feigned air of superiority when dealing with members of own race and any other minority groups. In need of major attitude adjustments.
– Exaggerated, whiny, Encino-esque valley girl accent.
– Delusions of grandeur… “I want it all…and that begins with the right (i.e. white) guy…” Asian-American princess complex.
– Uncanny ability of determine one’s nationality, occupation, earning capacity and make of auto within three minutes of commencing a conversation.
– Exaggerated perception of white males’ value in increasing AF’s social status.
– Ignorant and narrow-minded, eager to adopt and perpetuate fallacious western media stereotypes of Asian men.
– A compulsion to trash Asians, particularly Asian men, in order to justify their autoracist tendencies, placate their guilt and bolster their self-esteem.
– Extremely shallow, self-centered, argumentative and boring.
– Disdains ethnic studies; regards it as a major threat to her carefully constructed, self-deceptive whiggie identity.
– Despises all Asian men, with the occasional exception of their brothers (after all, they share the same genes.
– Believes that racism does not exist because she, as an AF, has never experienced it first hand, or is too dense to realize it. Besides, those Asiaphiles are so nice to her (while plotting to get into her pants.
– Gets a warm fuzzy feeling when watching The Joy Luck Club, while snuggled up to her geeky Asiaphile boyfriend.
– Believes that the only reason an Asian person would disrespect her is because they are racist.
– Has lost count of how many WM’s she’s done this month.
– The wet-dream come true for socially-handicapped Caucasian nerds who are unable to attract Caucasian women.
– Threatened and insecure in the presence of any culturally-perceptive Asian person or any AM not fitting her stereotype of the quiet , marginalized, “model minority” geek.
– Fundamentally insecure, utterly confused, lacking in self respect.
– Many aging whiggies, after being used and abandoned by WM’s in favor of younger, more nubile whiggies and being rejected by AM’s who see through their transparency, develop a bitterness towards all men, period.
– Denial of all of the above.
FACIAL EXPRESSIONS: a) Look of contempt when eyes meet those of any non-white male, converting to beaming grin upon sighting of WM victim/target; b) terminal pout or c) bimboish expression that defies deep thought.
TYPICAL ATTIRE: Anything trendy, mainstream-looking and seductive (especially if it’s black and tight). Big hair (perhaps their most valuable asset) tossed with hand every 15 seconds. Wonderbra. Fanatical whiggies have been known to undergo certain procedures such as eyelid surgery, breast augmentation and vaginal tightening operations in order to increase their marketability to WM’s. Blue contact lenses and bleached blonde hair have even been sported on occasion. Note: Attire may vary depending on the specific type of WM being targeted.
I.Q: Too low to measure.
NATURAL HABITAT:
Personal ad columns (“exotic, slim, SAF seeks successful, generous SWM”), cheerleading squads, sorority houses (role: token “oriental sisters”), T.V. newsdesks, B-grade Kung-Fu flicks, trendy nightclubs (usually found necking with aging WM’s), Chinese restaurants (slumming with the WM and demonstrating that she’s “in touch with her heritage”), anywhere else frequented by White males.
TYPICAL WHIGGIE QUIPS:
Age 10: “Mom, why do we have to be (Chinese/Japanese/Korean)? Do you have to dress like that? And what’s with Dad and his accent?
Age 12: “Mom, I want an eyelid job for Christmas, okay?
Later on…
“I’ve always only dated white guys. I don’t know why, I just have.”
“Race doesn’t matter. I just happen to like white guys. It’s just a preference.”
“We are the world, we are the children…We…”
“I’ve gone out with all kinds of guys…Dutch, English, French, German, you name it. Even went out with a Jewish guy once! After all, love is color blind.”
“Eeeew, Jennifer, how could you go out with that (insert minority group here) guy!?” Totally gross!
“Oooh Roger, you’re like soooo strong and intelligent. Did you say you drive a beemer? Kewl! (giggle).”
“I want to learn English better…you maybe teach, handsome man? Are you U.S. citizen?” (Yes FOB’s can be whiggies too!)
“Like why would I want to go out with an Asian guy? They don’t own me or anything. Uhh, and besides they are all male chauvinist …and domineering too…yeah that’s it! Didn’t you see The Joy Luck Club?”
Like, I’m dating *out* of my race, so how can I be racists?!! Duh!!
CLOSELY RELATED TO: Racists, bigots, wannabes, ho’s, chameleons, white supremacists, a fish out of water.
MEDIA REPRESENTATION/ROLE MODELS: Connie Chung, Amy Tan, Lisa Ling, Margaret Cho, Sheryl Wu Dunn, any of The Joy Luck Club protagonists (except the one who married an Asian dude).
NATURAL COUNTERPARTS: Asiaphiles…who else?
The trend in Asian American outmarriages is decreasing:
http://destroytorebuild.blogspot.com/2012/03/asian-american-interracial-marriages.html
I suspect, with the continued rise in power of Asian economies, the out-marriage trend among Asians will eventually decrease as well. Asians are often concerned with social status, lol. Sub-equal social status in any community and country is stressful. But, if you no longer have to marry out to “marry up” (i.e., marry white) – meaning if Asians continue to have increased economic power, healthier and better image for Asians in the media, along with improved social status – the out-marriage rates will decline.
Reblogged this on oogenhand and commented:
!!!VERY IMPORTANT!!!
Move to Canada. I’m half-East-Indian, half-white; nobody gives a fuck.
You Yanks are all obsessed with race. Here, people are people.
What about the Yazi? Yazi are Chinese male prostitutes selling their services to Chinese WOMEN…
As a Euarasian male, I sympathize for what you’ve been through. But I must say that I mostly disagree on what you are saying in this post especially all the self- loathing rants about “looking like an Asian male”.
While it is hard to fit in a category, I believe being ambiguous is nowadays a good thing. There’s just so much negativity against hapas in this post which I think is pretty racist in its own way.
And I don’t hate other hapa men like you do. I look at them and think to myself that I am not alone. In fact, Asian/ white couples make me happy, cause if not for such pairing, I won’t be here today.
It’s all about self acceptance and awareness. As a hapa, you are the one who’s supposed to know the first thing about that.
It sounds like you had a crappy father to be honest. My son is half thai half white and I honestly don’t care if he looks like me or like his mother, no matter what I will love him and teach him how to be a man and a good person.
[…] >>10185827 https://stuffeurasianslike.wordpress.com/2011/07/09/half-white-half-asian-like-me/ […]
longingfordeath.wordpress.com
Hey, good news everyone!
I am a full-fledged Asian male that was born and raised in NYC. I am different from my own kin and all others in society. I pass as a hybrid though. I have long hair that is naturally brown and not jet black! Also, I have been told I have a white nose. Though an Asian American that is full Chinese I could not identify with my kin as in other Asians that are mildly western because of my western education, life style, and friends.
At the same time, I do not fit fully in the picture with my western friends because I am simply not white at all, but inside I am exactly like any white boy; but there is more! I became this person that could get along with both sides of the coin!!
On the inside, I am neither fully Asian Chinese as well. This I think I could identify with you, the author. I feel the stereotypes on both sides and it does metaphorically rape your soul; only if let it bother you. It no longer bothers me that people ask why my nose is high and sharp, or how exotic I could appear. I am more advantaged that those plain white or Chinese boys despite being a full Chinese American; and so would you🙂