I’m American citizen, undecided voter, loving husband Ken Bone, Welcome to the Bone Zone! AMA

turdBouillon · 2016-10-14T11:34:15+00:00

Glad you made it. Stay golden.

paradox1984 · 2016-10-14T13:51:35+00:00

I have a sudden strange urge for some Chick-fil-A

Persephone_Shade · 2016-10-14T08:06:22+00:00

The troubles with Tibbles.

SoundBearier · 2016-10-14T13:01:57+00:00

But are notoriously bad in the skill positions. Decent on the line if the blocking assignments are simple. On the other side of the ball, yeah, they can get in the backfield, but you're gonna see a lot of penalties.

SillyPepper · 2016-10-14T03:14:42+00:00

Melina went up to him and talked to him about the peak of the coal industry in the 20s and how it has evolved with the nation's infrastructure over the years.

StanGibson18 · 2016-10-14T03:56:07+00:00

St. Patrick center provides temporary housing, job training, drug counseling, and help with mental health issues.

There is a severe homelessness problem in this country. Most of us are one or two paychecks away from being homeless as well. We need to start seeing and intervening on their behalf.

StanGibson18 · 2016-10-14T01:25:58+00:00

Radiohead is my all time favorite, nobody blends genres like Thom Yorke and the boys.

StanGibson18 · 2016-10-14T07:23:58+00:00

I'm not running for president. I can say whatever I want. I looked at naked chicks and wrote stuff about it while taking a shit. I'd feel bad if only 10,000 dudes weren't doing it right this second.

Saezeling · 2016-10-14T10:43:48+00:00

Ooh! I can answer why coral will expel the zooxanthellae (dinoflagellates). The dinoflagellates perform photosynthesis normally, but this ability can be negatively affected by environmental changes--this can be temperature-induced or because algae growth limits access to sunlight by covering the coral.

If the dinoflagellate is not producing enough then the coral will expel it as an adaptive measure. In this sense it'd rather take the risk to try to acquire a new, functional partner instead of dying with the old partner. As the guy I replied to mentioned, often they don't find a new dinoflagellate and end up dying, which results in the worsening cycle we've been seeing.

It's actually been suggested that this process has evolved over thousands of years to allow coral to survive other great environmental changes. This also depends on the ability of dinoflagellates to adapt to all the new changes we as humans have been causing recently. It's likely we won't lose the entire GBR, just that a fraction of it will be able to adapt and proliferate in time.

If anyone's looking for a cool microbiology book that's pretty damn exciting, check out March of the Microbes by John Ingraham. It mentions this, among many other stories and applications of microbes in the "real world" that aren't just really esoteric examples.

Prester_John_ · 2016-10-14T12:15:05+00:00

No joke. I genuinely believe that Russian shilling has played a huge part in shaping the minds of the guillable. Notice how the_donald, worldnews, /pol/ are have very quickly turned pro-russian this election cycle, but especially these last few months. And the funny thing is the mouthbreathers who screech constantly about US propaganda are just gobbling up a different brand completely unaware.

If Russia truly is astroturfing the American media its got to be one of the most successful forms of propaganda in recent history.

Griffin777XD · 2016-10-10T14:10:05+00:00

The US Presidential Election.

The writers are clearly running out of ideas and it's getting too hard to suspend disbelief.

Edit: The type of person who would spend actual real money on this stupid ass comment is the type of person that probably caused this mess.

Edit2: So there's no clear cut answer for how many idiots there are in the world with credit cards but I can prove the number is at least 2.

Edit3: So this post got another gold and someone gifted my account one too, making the total 16$ wasted. Is this funny? Do you sick psychopaths get a kick out of this? Also if anyone plays KoL by all means send me a Mr. A instead of giving me a fucking gold circle. I could actually USE that. But to those gilders, you accomplished nothing today and I hope you're happy with that.

Edit4: I didn't even get to fucking finish that last edit before two more assholes gave me gold, bringing the total up to 6 absolute morons. I'm not even doing this ironically to get gold, I'm just offended that you people are wasting money like this. It's torture. Help me.

Edit5: fuck

Edit6: Nobody is even finding these edits entertaining anymore and the only reason I do them is to give your waste of four dollars some meaning. Any enjoyment that could have been gained from this comment is now diminished because of you. Do everyone a favor and quit now.

Edit7: Okay Okay I have an idea. Please give me gold. I want gold. Gimme.

Edit8: That didn't work. I literally don't have the energy to type up an angry response. You win. Thanks for the gold. Are you happy now?

Edit9: No apparently not. Another four dollars wasted. How about this, if you send my Kingdom of Loathing account a Mr. A, I'll pretend like you gilded me and insult you accordingly. We can both get something out of this, please.

Edit10: See edit 5

Edit11: ITS TIME TO STOP. NO MORE.

RyanMcCourt · 2016-10-14T01:26:41+00:00

Have you ever said "We ken bone" when your wife asks what you wanna do tonight?

StanGibson18 · 2016-10-14T07:25:36+00:00

Be who you are. If people don't like who you are, they're not the right people to have in your life.

Mike737 · 2016-10-14T08:47:42+00:00

I'm going to take a wild guess that this should read "Bats make up 25% of all mammal specie types".

25% of all mammals are not bats....

ToDeathYouSay · 2016-10-12T19:23:40+00:00

I teach essay writing and your comment is the reason my students score so high.

/u/ThePegLegPete made a great observation, and it was clear to "us" observers who are paying attention. Nevertheless, no points are awarded for conclusions that are made where the reader actually has to connect the dots. Don't be subtle... be flagrant. Sorry /u/drew_carnegie...

Altruistic_complex · 2016-10-13T08:38:47+00:00

Stay strong and just focus on getting to the goal. I'm currently sitting in a hospital while my wife is sleeping. They induced her a day ago and we're running into complications despite a perfectly healthy pregnancy. We're still kicking though and all options haven't been explored yet. Most of the issues stem from one undetermined factor. Otherwise we'd be at home waiting for her water to break.

It's not all doom and gloom. There's still a light and firmly believe that it will turn out alright

Edit 1

They just broke her water. I will update everyone. This just happened from one moment to the next. Good news was that her amniotic sac did not rupture previously. Brb

Edit 2

Just got kicked out of the room for the epi. So I wanted to catch everyone up. About a week ago my wife had a watery leak that she wasn't sure what it was. She called some sources to see if she should be worried and they said no.

During our following ultrasound they discovered she was abnormally low on amniotic fluid. Not dangerously low yet but close enough. She shared the story about the event and the recommended we head to the hospital for the night. This was 2 nights ago.

After starting the process of induction she was not dilating the way she should. The issue with this is no one was sure if the bag ruptured or not and there was no way to confirm. After about 3 different people making attempts to find the bag we were warned this morning that due to the lack of dilation and the lack of certainty whether she ruptured or not they had to skip putting in the balloon and perform a C section.

A different doctor (big boss if you will) refused to acknowledge this as a failed induction and decided to try herself. She found the bag (YES!!!) and broke her water. They're now in process of giving her an epi. I will continue to update as things progress.

Thank you everyone for your empathy, kindness, thoughts and well wishes. You all helped me and my wife remain focus on getting through this and wish there was more I could do to express my gratitude.

Edit 3

Ok last update for a bit as I'm getting ready. Epi worked like magic. She had a nice smile on her face when I got back to the room. She's definitely not feeling the pain that she was under when they broke her water. Poor girl cried immediately both from pain and happiness knowing that the the amniotic bag hadn't actually ruptured which was the concern.

She still feels a pressure but not the pain from before. I stepped out with my sis in law (she's basically my sister as we all grew up together) to grab food as I haven't eaten much besides being sleep deprived. Going to do a short walk to digest a bit and come back to the room. Just got the call that she will be pushing in an hour. News keeps getting better and better. I'm so thankful.

For additional info for frequent questions. We don't know the gender as it's a surprise. It was our decision and it's been such a great experience. I stopped caring about what gender the baby will be and more about it being healthy. I can't get disappointed because whatever comes out is mine and I have no preference on gender. I can't remember the last time I thought about it. He experience was much easier than we expected and we enjoyed it so much we already agreed to do it again (yes I want more kids)

My grandmother is still with us and she will have the rare opportunity to see her great grandkids before she moves on. It turns out my appearance is so similar to her husband (my grandfather) that it's uncanny. He passed away when I was much younger. I've made people cry when they saw me for the first time because I'm apparently a splitting image. So I know this will be special for her.

Once again thank you everyone for lending us your ear, thoughts and so much more. I'll update again later when we hit the next few steps.

Edit 4

I'm happy to report that my wife and I created a beautiful baby daughter! Totally rubbing it in everyone's face that I was right (remember it was a gender surprise) Everyone including wifey swore up and down it was a boy (booyah)

I will update later tonight or tomorrow morning the amazing event that transpired earlier. For now the wife and I want to spend time with her. I need to at least nap and eat something. First I need to make sure wifey sleeps so I'll stay awake first. She's earned it. She did such a great job with the birth.

Revolvyerom · 2016-10-12T18:41:39+00:00

I hear you, man. It's right up there with people who complain about other people getting nice things!

qOJOb · 2016-10-12T18:25:30+00:00

Well it seems a lot people enjoyed it.

AwesomePocket · 2016-10-12T18:06:57+00:00

I don't think it was. Some jokes aren't intended to have overt punchlines. It was probably supposed to end there.

xyierz · 2016-10-12T17:50:33+00:00

In this case it seems more like a setup for an obvious punchline.

xenithflare · 2016-10-12T20:33:14+00:00

if someone said that in real life

Exactly. It needed to be said in a certain way, aloud, in order to be understood as a joke. In text form, it was a simple answer to the question posed.

splergel · 2016-10-12T20:10:36+00:00

It wasn't really subtle at all. If someone said that in real life, people would get the joke. Online jokes just tend to be overly blunt, because people move on to the next comment instantly after reading it. If the punchline takes even half a second to get, that's too late.

xenithflare · 2016-10-12T20:00:08+00:00

Maybe you need to spend more time in /r/dadjokes then to rediscover your love for perfectly timed puns

daily reddit gold goal