When House Rules 2014 winners Lisa Lamond and Adam Dovile married in 2015, they couldn’t wait to start a family. What they weren’t expecting is just how hard it would be – despite just how gorgeous their 10-week old daughter Arabella is!
Here, new mum Lisa, 31, and husband Adam, who won the silver Logie for Best New Talent this year thanks to his gig on Channel Seven’s Better Homes and Gardens, opens up about the struggles she has faced with a newborn and her traumatic birth experience which ended in a total of 20 stitches and no pain relief. YEEEOUCH!
How is motherhood?
It has been the toughest introduction to motherhood, but I love it. She’s pretty textbook. Really clingy, won’t go to anyone. It’s been interesting, but I wouldn’t change a thing. It’s the best thing that has happened to me, and the best thing that has happened to us. But at the same time, it has been very hard.
What has been hard?
She had pretty bad colic, was diagnosed with silent reflux and is now on medication for that. She also had significant tongue-tie and lip-tie, and had a few problems with her neck muscles. At one stage there, the only way she would sleep is if I bounced on an exercise ball for an hour. And after that, I would literally get 10 minutes without any screaming and pain. And then it was a repeat of that all day!
When did you realise Arabella was going to be a challenge?
Probably after a week-and-a-half. Everyone was like: “This isn’t right, Lisa. Go and get it checked out.” It wasn’t a normal newborn cry, she was in pain and it was bordering on eight hours of crying a day. It wasn’t until week six of struggling to breastfeed and nurses telling me she just wasn’t cupping right, that we found out she had significant posterior tongue-tie and lip-tie. She got lasered 10 days ago, and we’re trying everything to keep breastfeeding. But it usually ends up with milk all over her face and screaming, so I express. It’s an effort, but I really want her to get that [breastfeeding experience]. I think it will be a big milestone for her.
Lisa with a snoozing Arabella in their first few weeks. Image: Supplied
How is motherhood different to the way you thought it would be?
I didn’t have any big expectations. It’s so beautiful and such a blessing to be able to go through this. Sleep deprivation can be like torture sometimes! [Laughs]. I’ve had some hard corporate jobs in my time, and this is definitely the toughest job, but the most rewarding by far.
You must forget about it all when you see her smile!
Absolutely! Now that she’s starting to get over all of that pain, her personality is completely changing. I’m seeing her for who she is. She smiles so much and I will forget about these last 10 weeks. I mean, it could’ve been a lot worse!
Who has been helping you?
My mum has been. I couldn’t have done this without her. I came to Brisbane from Melbourne, just so I could have help while Adam kept working on Better Home and Gardens. I have so much respect for single mothers out there who don’t have the support that I have had. It’s really hard.
Arabella looks so much like Adam!
[Laughs] I know. Anywhere we go people tell us how much she looks like Ads. He loves it.
How has Adam been as a dad?
Brilliant! He’s just all over her like a rash. He’s absolutely smitten.
Adam, what do you love most about being a dad?
I love looking at my little girl, and knowing that Lisa and I created her! I also love having the responsibility of looking after her, teaching her about life, and watching her grow. She is changing every day and it’s amazing to see.
What was your birth like?
I had a natural birth. I asked for an elective cesarean but they didn’t give it to me because I was in a public hospital. During my pregnancy, I kept measuring small so I had to get regular monitoring. The day I went into labour, I happened to be going in for monitoring. I was getting pains in my back and I asked the lady: “Would I know if I was in labour?” And she told me my tummy was tight and might be in early labour. She told me to go home and have a shower. By the time I got home, the pain was really bad. The next 17 hours, Adam kept calling the hospital and telling them I was in pain and if we could go in. They kept telling us not to go until the pain was three minutes apart. They eventually said if I couldn’t “hack the pain” to just go in. When we got in, the midwife must of thought I was a princess, because she said something like: “Oh it looks like you might be a one child family, love!”
How did that make you feel?
It was horrible! Obviously it all worked out in the end, but we were upset. I’m no martyr, if there is pain relief for me, I’ll take it! They were trying to get me set up for epidural and then realised I was seven and a half centimeters dilated and my water popped. I had to start pushing and she came out posterior in 20 minutes!
Wow! Was she a big baby?
She was eight and a half pounds. I had 20 stitches and no pain relief. To be honest, it was pretty horrific! I didn’t sleep for about three or four days because every time I shut my eyes, I would get these labour flashbacks. I had to go and speak to someone about it, just to talk through it all and deal with it. It was pretty traumatic for me… and Adam. Adam was a blubbering mess - obviously because his daughter had been born, but I think also because he saw me in so much pain.
Adam, how did you feel when Arabella came out?
I felt like my life had just begun! It’s hard to explain in words how I felt, but to say it was the best moment in my life, is an understatement. I was so proud of Lisa, she really had been to hell and back throughout her pregnancy (having Hyperemesis Gravidarum), and labour wasn’t particularly a walk in the park either. It was hard to watch and not be able to do much for her. I will never ever forget the moment I saw my little princess come into the world!
You suffered from Hyperemesis Gravidarum throughout the pregnancy. Did that lift instantly?
Absolutely! Immediately. I was vomiting during the labour and as soon as she came out, it was instant relief. And I’ve had not one nauseous day since.
What has been the best advice someone has given you as a new mum?
I think the best advice has been to just be kind to myself. Motherhood is a tough job, regardless if you have an easy baby or a harder baby.
What are the best mummy hacks you’ve discovered so far?
Bouncing on an exercise ball. Adam found that out one night when she was really bad and started to bounce. We’ve not been able to live without it since. It’s what helps her get off to sleep. That would be a good tip of mine.
What other products have been absolute lifesavers for you?
The cheap little bouncer. She sits in that and likes to look around. And sometimes falls off to sleep in it. Also my breast pump! I had the regular Medela swing pump, and then ended up hiring the hospital grade one. It has helped us keep this breastfeeding journey alive. It expresses quickly and I’ve also bought the bra that allows me to express hands-free! [Laughs]
I’d love to see Adam’s face when that’s on!
[Laughs] Isn’t it amazing what men have to see?
Have you spilt a bottle of breast milk yet?
Yes! Adam spilt a bottle and I actually wanted to wring his neck! [laughs] It was a full one too. It was about 120mls! He felt so bad. We’re very careful now.
What is the sweetest thing Arabella has done so far?
Her smiles are always good. And the cooing noises she makes. We do a lot of tummy time and she’s already trying so hard to try and crawl.
