Braintree

Wilt (1990)

Actors: Roger Lloyd-Pack (actor), David Ryall (actor), Gina McKee (actress), Griff Rhys Jones (actor), Alison Steadman (actress), Togo Igawa (actor), Neville Phillips (actor), Mel Smith (actor), Diana Quick (actress), Anne Dudley (composer), Barbara Hicks (actress), Jeremy Clyde (actor), Chris Blunden (editor), Michael Tuchner (director), Roger Allam (actor),

Plot: Henry Wilt is a more or less failure of a teacher who fantasizes about murdering his dominant, non-attentive wife Eva. At a party Wilt is stuck to an inflatable doll and makes a complete fool of himself. Eventually, he dumps the doll in a hole at a building site. However, he has been witnessed getting rid of the doll and when his wife disappears on the night after the party, the police with inspector Flint strongly suspect Wilt of being guilty.

Keywords: based-on-novel, independent-film, inflatable-doll
Genres: Comedy, Crime,
Taglines: Has the shocking truth about Henry Wilt been inflated? An inflatable love story!

Quotes:

[Henry bursts into the church, to find the vicar trying to strangle Eva]::Henry Wilt: Now you listen here, if anyone's going to murder my wife, it's going to be me!

[Flint has found Henry in the graveyard]::Inspector Flint: I bet if we dug up these graves, we'd find a dead body in every one!::Henry Wilt: Well, so would I!

[Flint has realised that Henry is innocent of all charges]::Inspector Flint: In that case, *I* am under arrest. I am hereby arresting myself, for conspiring to falsify evidence for the wrongful arrest of a private citizen, misuse of police manpower and resources, and for knowingly obtaining an unlicensed firearm from an illegal source, with intent to murder and maim.::[Hands shotgun to Eva]::Inspector Flint: I am not obliged to say anything, but anything I do say can be noted and used as evidence. If someone would care to call the police, I shall be in the cemetery.::[Flint exits, while Henry joins Eva]::Henry Wilt: He's been under a lot of stress, lately.

Inspector Flint: Your wife! Your wife is *dead*!::Henry Wilt: You know what, Inspector, for the first time since I met you, you're in danger of actually being right about something!::[Henry wacks Flint into an open grave with the shovel, and runs off]

[Henry has arrived at the church, looking for Eva]::Henry Wilt: Why didn't I sign my own name. I'd be safely locked up in Broadmoor by now!

[Henry is looking through the kitchen cupboards]::Henry Wilt: [looking at the dog] Where does she keep the Marmite, Dasher?

Cranham: Don't tell the bastards nothing!::Henry Wilt: *Anything* Cranham! Don't tell the bastards anything!

Dave: [Indicating the students] They look like football hooligans!::Henry Wilt: They *are* football hooligans!